Rekindling Grudges

A week before my flight to Las Vegas, I was summoned to the HQ. I had just finished digesting the information Fox sent me when the Director said he wanted to see me for an important matter. I went there midday, my head already swarming with ideas of the said important matter. Ever since I was appointed in the Elites unit, I had always been given fairly dangerous missions. Although this might be my most dangerous one yet, the Director has never asked to see me before I went to any of the past missions. This would be the first.

The last time I visited the HQ was a few days ago already, when I sought after Fox for information. Today, it was the usual environment. Buzzing voices busy with cases, known figures of the government going in and out of the building probably visiting for some investigation, and of course, the commotions every now and then whenever significant information about a major case is freshly received. The usual FBI HQ at the heart of the Big Apple, Manhattan.

I went straight to the top floor, where his office is and knocked quietly. I heard a faint 'Come in', and I twisted the knob. The Director's office was spacious, with his desk space elevated by a few steps and a small sofa set on the remaining space that isn't elevated. I saw him sitting behind his desk and signing paperwork, when he raised his head to my direction. Director Morris Hammington, one of the top figures of the US government, is a middle-aged man with a bald spot atop his head as well as a fairly chubby body. Nonetheless, he's a terrifyingly powerful man.

"Hawk," he addressed me by my codename. Our unit's direct boss is the Director, and so we're quite acquainted with him – I'm just not in good terms with him. "Have a seat," he motioned to the couch.

I muttered my gratitude and chose the seat facing him, waiting for him to speak.

Our eyes met and we were quiet for some time, until he finally started, "The success of this mission lies solely on your shoulders, as I'm sure you're aware. The organization you're about to bring down is one that has been reigning supreme underground for decades, their legacy passed from generation to generation. How do you plan to execute this?"

His strained and grumbly voice, tone flat, rang in my ears. Aside from his title and reputation, the Director also has terrifying similarities with my late father. Probably because they've been comrades before or because they're great rivals, I don't know. Regardless, I hate seeing him because he reminds me of my father.

"I'd like to keep my plan for myself until I'm certain it will succeed, Director," I replied, relaxing my shoulders. "May I know of this important matter your message mentioned?"

He nodded and pursed his lips, irritation flickering in his eyes. I, too, remind him of my father. "Of course. Because this mission is of highest importance, we cannot afford to make any mistakes. So, I personally request you to use your real identity and leave it to us to remake your IDs. This is to ensure the Rios group to believe your background. They're highly secured and it is near impossible to infiltrate their base."

My real identity? I frowned. I didn't think I needed to use this level of cautiousness for this mission, but he does have a point.

"This order is only for you. Jaguar and Leo are free to use one of their fake identities because they're only doing supporting tasks. You, however, need to be careful with every move you do," he continued, clamping his hands together. "Don't worry. We will ask for your opinions on the minor information we can change."

"So, I'll use my family's name? And my birth name? Don't you think that's more of a risk?"

"Fallon Ravestreen. Orphaned at 16. Those are the only real ones we'll have you use. The rest will be faked. But you'll keep your appearance. Do not use fake lenses or wigs or you'll have a high chance of being caught. This is another long-term mission; you'll have to settle with your true appearance because faking every day for months will be hard."

"But, Director—"

"This is a personal order from me, Hawk. Were you just about to decline it?" He cut me off and raised a brow. I bit my tongue. "Do not act like this is your first time on a solo mission, Hawk. You should know the most about flunking important missions."

I gulped, remembering the number of solo missions I accomplished. That feat has become one of my remarkable achievements and to ruin them would be the death of me. This work is my life. And what am I so afraid of? I don't have a family that would be in danger should my birth name be hunted down. My family is the agents. I have more life as Hawk than as Fallon Ravestreen, and to use it like a fake identity is nothing…But that was the last I have of my parents.

I looked back at Director Morris, whose challenging gaze struck my pride. I raised my chin and remarked, "I'll do it, Director. Is that all?"

He nodded and looked back down on his paperwork. "That is all. You may go."

I didn't find the will to bid him goodbye. Taunting me just because I'm a living reminder of his horrible past, how childish. But I'm thankful of how he pushed me to surpass my limits by assigning the most dangerous missions to me, even though that wasn't his objective. He was helping me without realizing it.

As I left Director Morris' floor, I came across Leo and Jaguar talking by the vending machine. I stopped on my tracks. I couldn't hear what they were talking about, but I did see Jaguar hand Leo a can of cola. She scrunched her nose and shook her head, pointing to a juice bottle in the vending machine probably saying she prefers that one over the cola. He followed where she pointed and slightly smirked. He said something that made Leo smack his shoulder, pissed.

I turned on my heels and went the other way. My palm unconsciously landed on my chest, feeling my heart beats accelerating. Leo is a petite girl with average height and a bright personality. Although she's also an orphan, that didn't stop her from grinning widely every day and treating everyone kindly. Her big, pure heart was probably what caught Jaguar's. I bit my lower lip, willing my heart to calm down. I've always envied Leo and her tendency to charm all the guys. I never paid attention to that until she charmed the only man I've always seen in a different light.

Maybe during this mission, I will forget the unrequited infatuation on him. I'll leave with a broken heart and hopefully, return with a healed one.