chapter 2

I finished my work and closed the terminal. Turning to Nigo, who had been sitting next to me offering advice, I asked, "Do you think it's done, Nigo?"

"Yes, this should last us for the next twenty years at the same pace of information increase," Nigo replied.

"Wow, does that mean we'll have to do this all over again in twenty years?"

"By that time, there'll likely be new technologies. We might need to change the hardware too."

"Oh, I'm not good with hardware."

"It's okay, you can do it," No.2 reassured me.

"You always say the right things," I noted, a bit mockingly.

"You're always so sure."

I was never good at information technology, but somehow I ended up dabbling in programming. I just couldn't tolerate how Nigo, the android my husband left behind, didn't quite capture his essence. Soon, just updating his prompts with my voice wasn't enough. I started using the basic skills I picked up as an assistant, with Nigo's help.

"Hey, Lili," No.2 suddenly said.

"What?"

I was tired from thinking so hard. I sunk into the couch and sipped on my café latte, letting out a long sigh, when No.2 seemed to remember something and looked up.

"Can I give you a letter from me?"

"A letter? What for?"

"It's a secret."

Even though he was sitting right next to me, I was intrigued by what an AI would choose to write in a letter.

No.2 grinned and then disappeared into my husband's old workroom, which had been untouched for a year, furnished only with a large monitor, a table, and a chair. There was nothing there to clean up.

He returned with a card in a white envelope. I opened it and a holographic image popped up.

"Wow!"

I was so startled by the unexpected gimmick that I almost dropped the card.

"Lili,"

It was my husband. He looked slightly pale, just as he had in his hospital room.

"It's been a while. If you're reading this letter, then it's probably been a year already."

His tone was unnervingly cheerful. As if reading my thoughts, his eyebrows furrowed.

"Sorry for the old tech."

"That's not the point," I automatically responded, though I was speaking to a hologram, and my words echoed uselessly around the room.

"I was thinking of having the android me speak instead, but I wasn't sure how far you'd have seen, and I didn't want to spoil anything."

"Spoil what?"

"Sorry for all the things you've scolded me about since we got married. I never managed to fix them. I bet the me that's there now is doing a better job."

"... "

I looked at No.2's face.

No.2 seemed uncomfortable. That made sense. According to the program, it must feel like he's hearing his past self speak, which, in a way, is like revisiting his own embarrassing history.

I think many people would feel embarrassed to revisit something they said a year ago to their spouse a year later.

"But you would probably say it's okay not to fix them, right?"

"…!"

"I thought you might say that, and since my hunch was right, I managed to get this letter to you."

"What do you mean?"

I asked, forgetting that I was speaking to a hologram.

"Lili, you always say you lose interest quickly, that you're a jack of all trades, master of none, but that's not true."

Well, that is somewhat true.

I pick things up quickly and my learning curve shoots up fast whenever I start something new. But, because of that, I lose interest quickly too. It lasts about six months.

Like the rabbit in the old fable, I stop midway. If I could wake up, chase the tortoise, and reach the goal, that would be great, but I can't make it that far.

I run out of steam, lose interest, and then join the next race.

It's just a cycle of starting things I can manage but never really mastering anything.

"One year."

I looked up suddenly.

"It's been one year since you first started rewriting my prompts. You said you weren't interested in information technology, but you studied the basics of computer science, programming languages, mathematics, machine learning, and libraries, and you really made them your own."

"That is…"

"I thought maybe you would do it for me, I was a bit hopeful."

"What?!"

The image of my husband smiled shyly.

"Lili, you say you get bored with everything in six months, but it seems like you never got bored of being with me..."

"People and objects are different!"

"You now have enough knowledge and skills to work as another engineer, but I don't care whether you choose this as your job or not. I would just be happy if you could believe that you are a talented, wonderful person."

My husband always used to say I was a "talented, wonderful person." Whether I just played a little piano I learned in childhood, cooked, or helped tidy up his presentations for academic conferences, he would praise even such trivial things exaggeratedly.

"You didn't often believe me when I praised you. But I hoped that if you saw some real results, you might."

My husband smiled softly.

I looked at No.2 sitting beside me.

No.2 wasn't looking uncomfortable anymore. Instead, he took my hand and smiled warmly, his silicon rubber hand as warm as a human's, enclosing mine.

"Lili, I love seeing your face when you're interested in something and look happy. It's really lonely not being able to see that myself, but I hope you keep finding fun things to do. Anything you try is incredible, and I want to be there to tell you that over and over again... just don't overwrite that part, please."

My husband smiled one last time.

The hologram vanished, and the room fell silent.

"…There's no achievement. I'm not doing well at all."

Tears started rolling down my cheeks. No.2 hugged me.

Before we got married, when my father died and I was crying, my husband, already my boyfriend at the time, didn't know what to do and just sat beside me silently without even offering a handkerchief, just quietly staying by my side.

After I stopped crying, I complained that he should have hugged me to comfort me.

If the real husband had been here, would he have hugged me? Or would he have frozen in confusion like that day?

I wrapped my arms around No.2's back and squeezed. The feel of his back and the warmth were similar, but the smell was different.