Boy problems

There Was this one guy that caught my attention over and over again , he was my friend but from my friend he went to meaning something more to me, I liked him and he said he liked me too but he lied, he actually liked one of my very good friends and he didn't tell me about this until the day I found out and I saw them being cuddly and lovey doves and I confronted him about it .Well I actually didn't , Instead I had one of my other friends confront him because I was too scared to know the truth , too scared to hear it from his mouth that he had lied to me and instead went on to date my friend .

My friend didn't know that I liked him cause I hadn't told her before , I mean I didn't expect them to start dating a week after he told me he liked me .

I couldn't hate her for it because she didn't know but I couldn't bring myself to be happy for them , only one of my other friends knew about this , Decided to act like nothing had happened between us , well nothing actually did but He acted like he hadn't told me he liked me a week before asking her out.

I pretended to be happy for them I didn't want to seem jealous and unhappy for people who are happy with each other and so i pretended to be happy for them and make jokes and laugh when they talked about each other.

Until a week later when he came telling me he made a mistake my dating her and that it should have been me . A part of me happy but no one should be happy about someone saying dating their friend is a mistake .

He started to lovebomb me with messages and In person and talking about how it should have been me and I fell for it . And the guilt ate me up inside , when he had broken up with her , I didn't even want to be in a relationship with him anymore , it was wrong .

My friend was the kind to break up and not feel anything except she was really in love and Praise God that that was the case here , she actually met a guy she liked like a week after the break up .

I feared she would hate me for not telling I her I liked him or for liking him still even when they were dating . But she didn't , infact she just wanted him to treat me right but he was a different type of guy and after they broke up, he started dating a girl no one in the friendship group knew about . Where she came from , we didn't know , why i wasn't good enough again I didn't know .

It hurt , bad and I was in love with this boy . I was hooked , it took me a long time to get over him , maybe because he constantly came back to give me hope then shatter that hope again after a while .

Eventually I realized he was never going to like me and what he really wanted was a 'Friend With Benefit'. To him that's all I was good enough for but I was better than that and no matter how hard it was I had to force myself to move on.