Pain

I've spent the majority of my life in pain. From before I can remember I was treated differently then the rest of my siblings. For years I tried to run away from the abuse, or escape with video games or books. But no matter what, I always had to face reality.

I spent years being suicidal, depressed, and downright hopeless, but nothing changed. And even now, I've moved away from my abusive family and am living my own life. I am haunted by the nightmares of my past. Life has never been easy; and yet I'm still here. Physically alive but mentally drained and ready to give up.

I work at a local restaurant where I have to put up with people upset about the tiniest things. And you would think my coworkers would back me up when a lady is screaming in my face about her water being tap. But no, they just chuckle and laugh at me and leave me there to suffer.

So today I've decided...

I'm gonna end it.

I'm gonna put an end to my pain and suffering once and for all. I don't care if there's nothing after. Or even if there is. I can't take it anymore.

That's where I am now. Standing on the side of the bridge. The water is lower now due to it being early September and I can see jagged rocks sticking out along the banks. My landlord was planning on kicking me out anyway. My family won't care what happens. They never did.

I look over the edge and my heart jumps oh so slightly. 150 maybe 200 feet below the water is flowing softly. It's quiet, but I enjoy the silence.

Without another thought I fall forward off the edge.

I close my eyes and smile.

Finally... peace