Moments.

Keigan looked at me closely for so long that I almost thought I had stopped time for a moment. "No. If you don't want to use it, then you don't have to."

It was surprising, to say the least, considering what he went through to get it. Still, it wasn't like not forcing me to the ground and shoving magic dragon juice down my throat made him any better of a person. 'He doesn't seem smart enough to play mind games, so either he knows I'll take it, or he really is ok with me not.'

I popped the cap, 'I guess it doesn't matter either way…' Just like he said I put a drop in each eye and drank the rest. It was a bit hard to swallow, somehow tasting like a shot of vodka mixed with honey, and drunk while sick with strap throat… Dont ask…

At first, it just stung a little, not as bad as pepper spray, but like I got soap in my eyes. I felt an intense heat start burning in my face. Somehow not even that was uncomfortable though, it just felt like I was blushing really hard.

Then my blood began to boil, and I could have sworn I heard it turning to steam. It was similar to the feeling I had when I received the blessing from Rafi. Instead of an intense warmth though, it was like my skin was melting off.

Airsidh's feet slowly came down from the table as he leaned forward. "Hey, that dragon sight thing… One of the ingredients doesn't happen to be a dragon's heart does it?" I clenched my fist, resting it on the table, trying to cough but at the same time unable to breathe.

"Yeah, why?"

"And she's using it now! Help me get her away from the table so she can't hurt herself."

'Airsidh's yelling?'

Without asking why Mara quickly followed his lead. Pins and needles were running down my skin so intensely that I didn't even feel myself move.

"Guys?" My breath caught in my throat as the burning started to spread from my skin, to deeper in my head, lighting up my nerves like fireworks, several of them feeling like they were tearing apart and turning inside out.

"It's going to get worse before it gets better…" My brother said softly.

My head swayed as my vision started to flash between filters that seemed torn between a near-black horror movie and a candy-lined kids' TV show.

I raised my arms and covered my face, trembling as my eyes caught fire. Eventually falling to my knees. I screamed but no sound came out of my mouth as every fiber in my body tensed. "AH!" A short sound escaped in the middle of the pain, but my voice cracked, so even that was hardly audible.

 the pain grew worse until my whole body felt numb. Adrenaline rushed through my blood and my instinct to fight took over. I jumped back up to my feet and opened my eyes… I could see… Everything…

My vision had taken on an orangish hue of gold and I could feel my eyes reshaping themselves like the magic stone door in the courtyard did when it was opened. I simply accepted what was happening, closed my eyes, and focused on trying not to die as my insides turned to mush and even those rebuilt themselves. Somehow it felt like it passed in the blink of an eye, but at the same time took hours. I wasn't sure if I had lost consciousness, or how many times I had if I did.

Even my soul felt as though it was being melted, turned into a liquid and sloshing back and forth as the darkness inside began to boil and a molten gold poured into the mix before taking shape and hardening. I was changing down to my very core. When I finally opened my eyes and became aware of my body again, surprisingly my eyes were indeed the only thing that noticeably changed. When they moved it felt like stone gliding against stone, and as I rubbed them, they no longer had any "Squish," like an eyeball should. Other than that, I felt normal. I looked inwardly at my soul. It was trembling, but still seemed to move when I guided it, even if it was a bit stiffer than before, again like stone grinding against stone. My manna was a different story though. Rather than becoming stiffer, it had changed into a raging river that I was almost afraid to touch for fear of it flooding. The current inside of me was so fluid and strong that I might as well have been manipulating warm honey, compared to the now flowing stream of water through smooth stone channels.

"Siya," Keigan said my name, and in an instant my eyes snapped to his and peered almost inside of him. Somehow I was still on my feet as well. The burning had begun to rescind and I began to feel normal again. Despite the ordeal, my heartbeat was calm, and my breath felt easy, like waking up from a peaceful dream, only increasing my confusion and keeping me from speaking.

"Hahaha, I knew you would do it. And to find you here standing no less!"

I blinked several times, trying to get used to how different it felt, the colors all being more vibrant than I remembered, but having an orange tint, like it was always sunset. I raised my hand to rub them, but my body still wasn't ready to move, and I began to stumble.

"Yet another step towards new heights." Keigan grinned, stepping forward to catch me, but I pushed myself off of him and caught my balance on the wall instead.

"Stay… away from me! Every time you're around, something like this always happens… I-I almost freeze to death… O-or I get stabbed… Or mauled by wolves… JUST!" I swallowed and took a deep breath, trying to regain my bearings and cool wait for my head to cool down. "Just… don't come near me." 

"I, I can't forget what happened… You abandoned me again… Sure you came back that time, but only to force me to the ground… I lifted my hands to my eyes, calmly forcing them to stop shaking as the pain finally vanished. "I can still feel what it was like, clawing at the dirt." 

"I was covered in scratches and bite marks, corpses were all over me before suddenly you forced me into the dirt… Do you know what that's like? Having your arms twisted and your wrists bruised by someone who swore they would protect you… But I guess you didn't even do that much did you… You just said you wouldn't kill me…"

I leaned into the wall with my shoulder holding my wrists, slumping over and shaking. I wasn't sure if it was because I was still afraid of him, or if it was because of the pain I had just gone through, but the anger inside me built and built. At the same time, it was calm. I was calm. I was finally able to say everything I had been holding in for the past month.

"You said you'd have my back. Do you know what it's like to have a person say that, and hope that they actually mean it, only for them to let you get stabbed in the back, literally stabbed in the back a moment later? And for that same person to abandon you when you need them most, and when they finally come back only hurt you more? All of that… All of that, only for them to finally not be there at all when you fight the monster that is only hunting you because of them… Even now every time I see you it hurts…" A single tear spilled from my right eye, and the pain vanished in its entirety, but as I caught it with my hand I noticed a golden gleam as it splashed on my palm, as if I cried fairy dust. Ironically, the effect of the thing that caused so much pain, was also what calmed me. Any anger I felt vanished and turned to a dull nothingness.

He tried to approach me again but stopped instantly as I raised my hand. "I'm not looking for an explanation… You suck at those anyway. Just… Give me some time to be alone for a while, let my head cool off. If you have anything else to say you should wait until then… I doubt I'd hear it right now anyway. Your voice pisses me off…"

I followed the wall along the edges of the room to keep my balance and trudged up the stairs to my room, sitting down on my bed until my senses normalized again. 'Maybe I went too far… From his perspective he was gone for over a month, going through who knows what to get this for me so that I could see again without worrying about damaging my eyes when I use magic… It was made from dragon parts… A dragon he hunted…'

'This family is insane…'

I fell onto my back, staring up at the ceiling. 'No, It would've been too far if I was just blowing up at him because of this, especially because it actually helped. I wasn't even complaining about the dragon sight though. It was everything else he did. For helping my eyes recover I should almost thank him, but for everything else? Unforgivable.'

The door opened and Mara came through. I didn't look, but I could tell just by her footsteps, and the way she paused before entering. She came over and sat down on the bed next to me. "Siya… I never asked about what happened in that dungeon… but it…. Hurt you…. Deeper than you let show… Didn't it…"

When I didn't respond she fell on her back too, laying down next to me. I felt my eyes twitch as the mattress moved under her weight. For a moment I couldn't just see her. Her breath, her skin, the beautiful silver and gold of her hair, but I could see her manna, circling calmly through her with a strange pureness that felt so close to my own. Strange as it was, focusing on that was what put my restless thoughts at peace. "It was a nightmare…" I finally said softly, turning my head to look into her eyes.

A long silence overtook the room. It felt like she didn't know what to say. Or like she knew what she wanted to say, she just didn't know how to say it. 

"It… is over now though at least."

I sighed with a smile. It was almost funny how hard she was trying. She had never said a sentence that sounded so clunky in her life. "I know that… But… knowing that isn't enough to stop it from not being over."

She laughed. "Did you even hear yourself?"

"Yeah… It doesn't make much sense does it…"

Every time she blinked her eyes seemed to sparkle, and I felt like the more I stared into them the more I started to see… Something deeper. "Listen… You're father is…"

"Can we talk about this later… Even if I wanted to listen my head's too hot right now… I forgave you… But you changed how you treated me before I measured up to your standards, not after like he did. Even if he wants to be the best loving father from this moment on it's too late, it doesn't mean anything anymore because he didn't care until after I measured up… That's not a father that's just… I don't even know…"

She let out a sigh with another soft smile before reaching around and pulling me close. "Just… Don't let him ruin the way you think ok? After everything you've overcome, it seems like a shame for him to be the one thing you still shake at the thought of… Although I guess he is the one thing haunting you that's still alive…"

I rolled onto my side and rested my head on her shoulder. "I know he makes you happy at least some of the time… But if he ever hits you, like he did me…"

After a pause I felt her chest rise with a deep breath before she let out a small groan, making me a bit concerned.

"He hasn't right?"

She sighed. "No, it's not that. I was trying to think of how to answer the question. See, if he ever tried he'd probably end up eating a knife and sleeping in the stables, so he wouldn't dare. But, thinking about it… You said he hit you… And well… He didn't eat a knife… Or sleep outside…"

I understood why she felt bad, or at least conflicted, but it almost made me laugh. "You're scary sometimes Mom…"

She groaned again. "And he pisses me off too you know? Hey, you're living tomorrow, right? I'm sleeping in here with you tonight."

"Wh-what? Wait, hold on. Those two things are entirely unrelated!"

"What, you seemed fine with it when we shared my bed? Is this another one of those weird things you get all shy about?"

I was left speechless, not sure how I was supposed to respond. After a moment I slowly cleared my throat. "I'm not your only daughter you know…" 'Lu is leaving with me… What about her?'

She let out a laugh so hearty it almost felt fake "You're right, I'll go get Lu, your bed is big enough for all three of us."

"That's not what I…" 'She's already gone…'