29 [28] - Broken
Chapter 28
Leaning against the wall, Jennie stands with her arms crossed, looking with wilted expressions at Jisoo, who is sitting in front of her a little far away from her while she is being examined by the doctor who is now measuring her blood pressure to check if she is still under the influence of shock or not. He and the nurse had treated her visible and superficial cuts, cleaned the blood off her face and wrapped her hand with a gauze after stitching it up.
Jennie herself still has not completely wrapped her mind around what happened and cannot get herself to process it. She herself feels as if her mind has gone blank.
Everything just happened so sudden and so fast.
"Jennie, where is your arm sling?" Lisa asks as she approaches her with Chaeyoung, bringing her out of her thoughts.
- "Aah.. I left it at home, it hinders my movement." Jennie replies tiredly after turning towards Lisa and looks down momentarily.
Lisa tries to protest, but Jennie beats her to it and stops her, "It's fine.. really."
Lisa keeps staring at her a little with uncertainty, and then sighs as she turns her gaze away.
"Jennie, are you okay?" Chaeyoung asks when Jennie breathes in sorrowfully and leans back against the wall.
- "I don't think I'm the one you should be asking this question." Jennie says in an exhausted tone, as she turns her head to look sadly at Jisoo. Lisa and Chaeyoung both turn to look at Jisoo too.
Lisa sighs again and goes to lean on the wall next to Jennie too, and Chaeyoung does the same and stands next to Lisa.
"I still can't believe Matthew is really dead."
Lisa remarks and breathes out helplessly, and they remain thus, letting silence descend between them. They hear the sound of hurried footsteps and turn towards the sound and see Sehun running towards them with Jin Young following behind.
Jennie moves away from the wall, furrowing her eyebrows, looking quizzically at Jin Young's presence next to Sehun, but she does not say anything and only draws her attention to Sehun.
"Jisoo.. what happened to Jisoo?" Sehun says breathlessly when Jennie stops them as he looks at Jisoo with great concern.
"She's okay.." She says, and pauses, rolling her eyes on herself. She rephrases meaning her injuries,"I mean.. nothing serious."
- "I have to talk to her." Sehun says glancing at Jennie and then returns to look at Jisoo.
"Not now.. I don't think she wants to talk about anything now." Jennie says apologetically.
Sehun stares at her a little, and then looks at Jisoo and stares at her too, wearing worried and sad expressions. He sighs deeply as he turns his gaze away in despair.
"Do you know what happened?" Jin Young asks as he steps up a little, addressing Jennie.
At first, Jennie doesn't answer him, she just looks at him with disdain, and then answers as she turns her gaze to the other side.
"Not yet. The police are not accepting to reveal anything at the moment."
Silence reigns between them as each one of them looks randomly around, not really knowing what to do, when Sehun suddenly turnes around and starts walking out of the corridor, past the standing policemen, and Jin Young follows him, leaving the girls looking their way with confusion and bewilderment.
. . . . . .
Sehun comes down to the reception area and makes quick strides, looking intensely, intending to talk to the police officer. When he approaches and spots him standing, he sees Teddy standing next to him too, both seeming to have a conversation.
"Teddy?" Sehun calls, furrowing his eyebrows with confusion as soon as he walks up to them, attracting the attention of the officer and Teddy. "What are you doing here?"
The officer sighs as he looks at both of them and answers on Teddy's behalf,
"He was the one who reported and called the police."
-"What?" Sehun says with an increasing questioning.
**
"That's why you want me to plant a bugging device?" Teddy asks incredulously and then goes to sit on one of the chairs.
- "Yes.. I want it to be very small and unnoticed. You can make that right?" She says as she walks towards him with her hands in her pockets and stops at a distance from him.
Teddy remains silent, staring at her as if he's thinking about it and then follows:
"I can, but it will take a few hours and also.. how do you know for sure that he will confess or even that he is going to follow you?"
- "I will find a way, and I don't know when he will show up exactly, but he will definitely do so, that's why I have to move quickly."
She says knowing that her panic attack and turmoil yesterday has more likely exposed her or at least made them suspect her.
"So?" Jisoo says with anticipated expressions raising her arms a little while her hands are slightly still inside her pockets, to attract his attention when silence fills the space for moments.
"Where would you put the bugging device?"She adds curiously.
Teddy looks at her a little, and then lets his gaze wander over her clothes.
"Your coat buttons."
He says with a pondering expression, and then gets up and advances towards her, looking at her coat, specifically the medium-sized circular buttons, compared to the size of the normal small button.
- "Can you put it behind the button?" Jisoo asks him astonished.
"Yes.. but you should always wear the coat or keep it beside you."
-"not a problem." She says nodding her head.
"But.." Teddy suddenly interjects making Jisoo look at him while squinting her eyes in question, "Isn't it dangerous to do this on your own? What if things got worse and got out of control?"
"There is no other option." Jisoo sighs helplessly.
"I can't just go and accuse him. I have to bring an evidence and make him confess willingly."
She pauses for a moment and follows,
"You will be listening to everything. If you feel that things are about to go wrong, call the police immediately. "
Teddy expressions then change from confusion to perception and understanding.
"You can track me from the device too, right?"
She adds and he nods confidently.
**
"This is an audio recording of everything that happened." Teddy says after explaining to them what happened, handing the usb drive over to the police officer.
"Practically, it was self-defense." He adds, and then sighs, looking at Sehun and the officer.
. . . . . .
"Doctor, can we take her home now?" Jennie asks as she stands in front of the doctor at a distance from the girls and Jisoo.
- "Yes, but someone always has to stay with her because she is still under shock."
He answers and she nods to him with understanding, and while they're thus, one of the policemen approaches them.
"Excuse me, we would like to take her statement now." The man says, standing next to the doctor and Jennie, causing her to look at him with unease.
- "Can't you put it off until tomorrow? She's not in good state now." She says and looks at the doctor with a hopeful eye, so that he will intervene and agree with her words.
"She is right." The doctor says facing the policeman. "As you can see, she is not in a condition that allows her to give a testament. She has to submit to rest first."
The man looks at the doctor first, and then at Jisoo, he sighs, nods to them and leaves.
"Thank you." Jennie says to the doctor after the policeman has left
The doctor smiles at her and nods to her in appreciation and leaves as well, leaving her standing alone, she keeps staring at him as he goes and turns towards the side where Jisoo is and keeps looking at her with concern and uncertainty, sighing deeply before looking at Lisa and Chaeyoung, who were mirroring her expressions, as if to ask them whether it's time to go talk to her or not.
They nod to her slowly affirmatively encouragingly and she starts walking towards Jisoo.
🎶▶️ The Beginning of The End - The haunting of bly manor ost.
She walks steadily until she's standing in front of Jisoo and squats down gradually so she's at Jisoo's eye level, to be able to look at Jisoo's face, who was looking at the floor with her head down.
"Jisoo.."
Jennie begins with a soft tone as she puts both her hands on Jisoo's knees gently, attracting her attention to look at her with tired expressions, Jennie swallows thickly and calmly continues, "Jisoo, we have to go.. we have to go home so you can change your clothes and so you—"
She cuts herself off, lowering her gaze for a moment and follows as she looks back at Jisoo,
"So you can rest a little."
"What about Matthew?" Jisoo asks, looking at Jennie with genuine curiosity and with clear concern. "We can't leave him here."
She turns her head towards the mortuary room, and Jennie's features are scattered with grief, she doesn't know what to say, so she stays silent as Jisoo returns to look at her.
"Jennie, we can't just leave him here and go. He'll feel lonely."
She says, making Jennie look at her with full eyes and pained expressions.
"Jisoo.."
Jennie starts again as she takes a shaky breath trying to speak clearly and steadily.
"Matthew.. Matthew can't come with us anymore." She says and Jisoo looks at her disapprovingly. She furrows her eyebrows and sits upright in her seat."He has gone to a better place."
"No. no no.." Shaking her head, Jisoo protests. "He can't.. I'll talk to him." She says and then gets up and walks past Jennie as she advances towards the room while Jennie stays in place feeling helpless.
. . . . . .
Jisoo enters the room, leaves the door close behind her, and sees two men in nursing clothes standing at a table in the middle of the room with Matthew's body covered entirely in white medical cloth. In the hand of one of them, a clipboard.
They turn to her and exchange looks between them afterwards, knowing to whom she has come here, and then they begin to walk out when she begins to walk forward, leaving her alone in the room.
Jisoo remains standing for a while, looking at the table and at the body laying on it, she then walks slowly towards him until she is close and stops. She lets her gaze wander from his head, down his body and to his feet, blinking several times, she fixes her gaze in the direction of his head.
She raises her left hand slowly towards the cover to lift it and before reaching it, her hand stops mid-air and she pulls it away. She stays hesitant for a moment before reaching out and grabbing the end of the cover, feeling her hands starting to shake and her breathing hyperventilating. She pulls the cover slowly, revealing Matthew's pale face little by little.
Once her eyes fall on him, she feels a sudden chill all over her limbs and coldness, tugging at her heart, and she steps back a little unwillingly.
She stands in panic, staring at him with disbelief, and then advances once more, staring deeply at him and slowly reaching out with her right hand until she gently touches the front of his hair with trembling fingers, she then slowly runs them over the rest of his hair.
**
Jisoo laughs sarcastically and follows, "Oh you're such a show off."
"Okay okay, I'm joking. All I know about the stars is all my mom had told me." he says calmly, looking at the sky.
And Jisoo stares at him thoughtfully.
**
"Isn't it time for you to wake up?"
Jisoo quietly asks, lowering her head towards him, caressing his head gently and looking at him with watery eyes.
The door to the room opens behind her, and Jennie walks in as quietly as she could and stands at the door.
"There is still a lot that you haven't told me.. there are still a lot of things that I don't know about stars.."
She raises her head and glances at the direction of his arm and moves the cover a little to reveal his hand and firmly grasps it with the other hand and looks back at him.
"You can't just go like this.. you can't—"
She chokes out and falls silent when her eyes suddenly flood. She leans forward and gently places her forehead on his forehead.
"I didn't even get to say goodbye to you." She says through the tears, in a faint, almost whispering tone, closing her eyes, crying and holding his hand tightly.
It was more than losing someone who helped her, much bigger and deeper.
Jisoo was seeing him as her friend, a friend that she cares for.
Even when Jennie first told her about his truth, she almost couldn't believe it, which is why she was very angry with him. She wasn't able to comprehend that Matthew, who she was spending time with, was the same person who Jennie talked about, because both versions were totally different.
She was prepared to hurl insults, reprimand and even beat him up, but deep down she was also ready to listen to his reasons and excuses.. because there's always a reason, it had to be.
She was giving him the chance to justify himself despite her anger and hurt..
She was ready to give him the benefit of the doubt.. She was ready to forgive him..
And she did.
And she wanted to tell him that.. she wanted him to know..
That he's accepted.. that he's forgiven..
He was her friend.
🎵⏸
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Jisoo walks down to the reception area a few hours later with the girls surrounding her; Jennie on her right side, Chaeyoung and Lisa are on the other side. She was walking steadily, dragging her steps heavily, with her wilted eyes fixed on the ground. She walked, feeling the weight of her chest increasing with each step as she forced herself to step forward and resist the strong feeling within her that was telling her to return.
She was going home, but what about Matthew?
She was like the walking dead.
"Jisoo!"
The girls stop along with Jisoo when they hear Sehun's voice as he was coming towards them, he stops when he approaches and stands before Jisoo.
"Jisoo, my dear, are you okay? Are you hurting somewhere?" Sehun asks worriedly, looking at her sadly, and holds her arms.
Jisoo raises her head to look at him and keeps staring at him with lifeless eyes.
**
"If he had been there that night, and if he had given you some of the attention that he gives to his work, your mother would have been alive until this day.."
**
Her heart..
Her heart is the place that hurts the most.
She kept staring at him for another few seconds before turning her gaze away and lowering her head. She removes her arms from between his hands, walks past him, and leaves on her way to the main door.
Jennie remains standing in shocked moment, looking at Jisoo and at Sehun, who remained still, looking at the void, feeling very confused while Jennie felt awkward by what happened and surprised that she immediately went after her without saying anything. Lisa and Chaeyoung feeling the same, they followed them along.
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At home, in her room, Jisoo sitting at the edge of the bed as Jennie, who is now in the midst of taking off her coat, sat her down.
Jennie kept looking at Jisoo as she took off her coat, watching her closely. She throws her coat on the chair and goes and opens the inner bathroom door and lets its light illuminate the room a little. She saunters to Jisoo and kneels in front of her as she did in the hospital.
"Jisoo .." Jennie calls softly with caution as she looks up at Jisoo with caring eyes, "Would you like to shower first? I'll come with you, but I'll take out some clothes for you before that. "
She says and falls silent, waiting for Jisoo's response. She stands up when Jisoo nods weakly to her and helps her to stand as well and accompany her to the bathroom. She closes the door and heads toward the wardrobe, and before she opens the door, she hears the home phone ringing from the first floor, ringing loudly to the overwhelming calm inside the house and she goes to check it quickly.
. . . . . .
Jisoo stands naked, looking with a distant expression at the bathtub and at the shower head, she walks forward and steps in the tub.
She opens the faucet and water starts pouring on her head like a waterfall, she ignores its coldness at first until it gradually becomes warm and closes her eyes. She raises her head backwards as she feels the water washing her all over, washing her head and body and coaxing her a little.
She remains like this for a moment and then opens her eyes slowly as she lowers her head and looks at the floor of the tub and sees the water mixing with a fainted color of blood and she keeps staring at it as flashbacks start to come down at her like a lightning.
**
"Especially since he made you look like her a lot.."
—-
"She didn't even let me touch her!"
**
Jisoo raises her hand and places it on the wall tiles as she shivers, still staring at the floor but not really looking at it, watching as the water drops fall heavily around her face.
🎶 ▶Miss Ripley Ost - Glass
**
"What can we do? it was her fate, even I couldn't prevent her death."
——
"I.. will never hurt you."
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"Maybe I should have just taken you..
Just like how I did with your mother. "
**
She slowly raises her hands and holds them out in front of her, looks at them, and remembers when she first met him and when he kissed the back of her hand to then a feeling of dirt and disgust fill her. She felt as if her body was full of filth, and so she lifts her hand and starts to wipe and rub the back of her other hand, determinedly so.
Wanting to wash that feeling away desperately.
When another flashback hits her..
**
"No matter what you try.. no matter how strong you become.. you remain just a girl."
**
The movement of her hands increases as she scrubs her other hand, she directs her hands to her neck and starts rubbing it as well, recalling how he dragged her and sat on her stomach, and his attempt to choke her, with his filthy hands tightening around her neck and her feeling of dirtiness increased exponentially to all parts of her body.
She begins to scrub her arms, hands and her whole body in a hysterical way as another memory inflict upon her, in which she was killing him brutally.
Reliving how the piece of glass harshly cutting his veins, remembering the blood sprawling all over, and suddenly, she sees her whole body stained with blood, all blood, only to become more troubled, more unsettled. She felt helpless, neither the blood is leaving her body, nor the feeling of dirt, no matter how forcefully she scrubbed her body.
"It doesn't go away.. it doesn't go away.. it doesn't go away.."
She begins to mumble to herself deliriously as she continues to scrub her arms.
Just right then, the door opens, and Jennie enters with clothes in hand, and as soon as she looks at Jisoo in that state, she freezes in place and her eyes widen alarmingly. She immediately throws the clothes aside and rushes to Jisoo.
"Jisoo.. Jisoo.."
Jennie tries to draw her attention calmly as she extends her arms towards Jisoo without being able to touch her due to Jisoo's constant movement, trying to talk her around.
"Jisoo, calm down.. look at me—"
- "it doesn't go.. it doesn't go away.." Jisoo continues to repeat those words as she looks at her body in panic, starting to rub her arms harshly, can't even hear Jennie at this point.
"What is there? What happened? Jisoo look at me.. Jisoo stop!
Stop!"
Jennie pleads, getting more panicked about Jisoo's state. She slips one leg inside the tub as she moves closer, ignoring the water falling from the shower, and tries to hold Jisoo's hands to stop her, but Jisoo pulls her hands away to goes back to scrub her body again.
"Jisoo, I'm Jennie. It's me, Jennie, please calm down!"
Jennie says worryingly as she tries to hold Jisoo's hand and fails again.
- "It won't go away.. It doesn't go—"
"Jisoo, stop it!"
Jennie calls in a loud stern tone as she steps fully inside the tub, surrounding Jisoo sideways with her arms, not caring about the outpouring water. She holds both Jisoo's arms firmly and clenches her teeth from the sudden stinging pain in her shoulder, trying to hold Jisoo's arms still as she was still moving them hysterically.
"Stop..stop.. please.. you're okay.. there's nothing wrong with you.. you're okay.."
Jennie coaxes with urgency through gritted teeth, as she tightens her arms around Jisoo and feels the burning in her eyes, her chest is hurting to see Jisoo like this and she doesn't know what to do. All she knows is that she has to hold her tightly and closely.
In the heat of the moment she spontaneously steps back and her foot slips a little causing her to slide down gradually and sit on the wet floor of the tub, pulling Jisoo with her to collapse in between her legs.
"It doesn't go.. it doesn't go.. it doesn't go.."
Jisoo continues to mumble with her head buried in Jennie's bosom until she can hardly move her body because of Jennie's firm hold on her.
"Stop.. Jisoo stop ... please stop.. you're okay.. you're okay.. there is nothing there.. there's nothing.. I'm sorry.. I'm so sorry.. you're okay.."
Jennie repeats her words as she cries, with her arms around Jisoo like a blanket and the severe pain from her wound not even a concern to her, she tightly hugs her.
She was sorry because Jisoo had to go through all of that, she was sorry because of how Jisoo is feeling what she's feeling right now, she was sorry because she couldn't do anything to prevent it..
While they're thus, Lisa comes running after hearing the noises and stop at the bathroom door, shocked by what she is seeing; Jisoo, fully naked in the tub, constantly babbling, shaking in turmoil, and a completely soaked Jennie, hugging her and holding her arms still, whispering to her some words, trying to ease her, and crying.
At that, she quickly turns around and stretches her arm in front of Chaeyoung when she comes and feels her approaching to stop her before she sees what's inside.
Before she sees Jisoo in that state.
Chaeyoung looks at her with confusion as she hears the noises from inside the bathroom. Lisa locks eyes with her, teary eyes, wearing sad expressions and shaking her head, indicating that she mustn't not step any further.
She herself couldn't bear seeing Jisoo in that condition.
Not because she saw it as an embarrassing sight, but because she had never seen the strong and resolute Jisoo, who once was walking with her head held high, that broken and that wrecked before.
Jisoo who was like a resilient castle, standing like a shield before them, is now totally crumbling down before her eyes.
It was shattering.. heart-wrenching.
And so she won't look. She won't, and she won't let Chaeyoung look and see that either.
🎶⏸
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Sitting on the sofa in the sitting area of the lounge upstairs, with her forearms resting on her knees, Lisa was clasping her hands together with her head leaning against them, and constantly shaking her leg, and Chaeyoung was sitting next to her with her arms crossed near her chest.
As they were sitting in silence, Jennie walks in on them as she walks in drained manner, staring into the void on her way to them.
When Lisa notices her, she immediately sprints up along with Chaeyoung and steps towards Jennie. That when she spots a large blood stain on her blues from the side of her injured shoulder.
"Jennie! Your wound is bleeding!"
Lisa exclaims when she walks up to her and as she reaches out to hold her arms, the strength abandons Jennie and she slumps at the closest sofa and Lisa instinctively lowers her body with her when she does, so that Jennie falls into her embrace as her head rests on Lisa's arm.
"She's in pain.."
Jennie begins with a trembling tone, filled with hurt and frustration, and looks at the ground as she gradually begins to sob.
"She's in pain and I can't do anything about it."
Lisa stays still for a while, her arms draped loosely around Jennie and cautiously, to then she gently encircles them around her, and begins to stroke her back while she is also holding back her tears.
"Shhh.." Lisa says with a soft, subdued tone. "It will pass.. it will pass..
We're here.. we'll all take care of her.. she will be fine.."
She has to.
"We'll get through this.."
She says hopefully and hugs her while Jennie drains her own pain through her eyes.
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To be continued
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A/N: next update next week if everything goes well :)
Also, one of the reasons I update late -beside my graduation project and studies- is that I have been writing my new story, which is already published in my native language. I will start translating it once I finish this one, so stay tuned.
