Ep. 77 - Rimuru Joins the Battle, Good Old… New Universe?

At any rate, everyone in the gang is now an Incarnation, even the maids, my apprentice, who became the Incarnation of Defiance, and the Shipgirls and Gungirls. Pretty cool.

"Tula, we need to get out of this place! I'm dying here! Too boring!" said Yang

"Deal! I'll get the slime, then we can go away. You guys decide on a universe, we're leaving when I get back."

Yeah, no. Fuck this shit. Too boring. Peace is absolute bullshit. I hate it. War is much more entertaining when you are the one to cause it. Not so much for those that actually fight in it.

I teleported next to Rimuru, who was taking a bath in the onsen.

"Hey, Rimuru. We are about to leave. Want to come with me?"

"Yup! I've been waiting for this!" she said and got up. "So… Am I your wife?"

"If you want. Weiss has already talked with you, so it's fine for me."

"Then I am. Let's go."

And so, Rimuru joins the batt- Wait! Wrong franchise. And so, Rimuru joins the group as my wife. I took Veldora out and manipulated him into becoming the protector of peace. I also strengthened him a little to the Origin God level.

We teleported back to the Tower and I started my little project, a very quick one. I simply moved the core of the Voice to the Tower and left a 'relay' in this world, so that we can continue to evolve when we reach the requirements. It took me a couple of seconds since I didn't use time-dilation.

I reached the gang with Rimuru in tow and sat on my throne. Oh, there is something I forgot to do. I snapped my fingers and changed the material of our thrones to the same one that made up the Infinity Stones, just that I filled it with our respective laws. They were very shiny now, so I like it.

"So, which universe?" I asked.

"Ours. An alternate one. I want to mess with their Ozpin and our younger selves." said Blake. "Oh, how stupid I was back then, can't believe I hid my real identity…" she whispered. Weiss went near her and hugged her a little.

"We were all pretty strange in the beginning, then we became awesome." Sun said.

"I totally want to see a young Jaune. He must be adorable" said Jeanne. I press 'X' (reference!). He was pretty awkward and… sad, really. Ah, the version where I didn't exist. Our Jaune is cool, no doubt about that.

"I have the feeling you are dissing me..." muttered Jaune

"Totally your imagination. Should we make a grand entrance or just act like normal humans?"

"I want to become a student, so let's act like normal humans. You manipulate this Ozpin guy into accepting us into Beacon and create one big 'experimental' team with all of us, then we start messing with people." said Loki

"Ooh, deal!" I said. I stored the floating island in my Inner World and opened a portal for us to enter a good old new universe. Sounds stupid, should never say that again.

After we stepped out of the portal, we found ourselves in Forever Fall. In order to remember the good old times, Yang created a chalet, just like the one I had built in the beginning.

"Home sweet home…" she muttered. "We should take a trip back to our original universe. I am starting to miss dad…"

"We can go there whenever we want. Even now." I said.

"No, let's stay here a little, then we can take a trip back home. I want to show dad how awesome I became!"

"Well, without wasting too much time, we should totally check out when we are and what changed compared to the universe we know." said Pyrrha.

I already knew. Amat-Mamu is great on this front.

[What do you mean 'on this front', Master? I am always great, you just can't appreciate my greatness!] she said. What's with this sassy Skill?

Basically, Grimm creatures sometimes gather into naturally occurring 'Dungeons'. Salem here is the bad girl, for real this time. She also creates spatial cracks that lead to a separate dimension full of Grimm, which people call 'Gates'. but those cost a lot of energy and are pretty much reserved for invasions. It's pretty much Solo Leveling combined with RWBY. I dig it. Oh? Ruby is older? Torchwick is a good guy and a student at Mistral? Neo, Cinder, and gang too? And Ozpin is evil…

"What the fuck?" we all said at the same time.

"This… This is a clusterfuck! Tula not existing is pretty normal, Dungeons and Gates could pass, me being older too, but Ozpin being a bad guy? I mean, the only thing he's ever done in our universe is drinking coffee and leading others!" said Ruby

"Ruby is right, but this also makes this universe much more fun to mess with. Actually, where did Neo go in our universe? You didn't kill her, right?" said Weiss.

"No, actually. Let me check." I said and used Amat-Mamu. "Oh, she was so depressed after Torchwick's 'unfortunate accident' that she offed herself. What a pity. Well, I will be her wingman in exchange."

"Damn, that's dark and sad. Poor girl. Maybe we should heal and manipulate Torchwick in our universe, then resurrect Neo…" said Ruby. Well, I'll think about it.

"Well, there is a little problem: Beacon has already started." said Hinata.

We all looked at her and laughed our asses off.

"D-dear! Please don't make such jokes! We are Gods! Time is our bitch." I said and snapped my fingers, turning back time to the day of Torchwick's heist, at least according to canon. I also manipulated Ozpin's mind so that we would be admitted as an 'Experimental Hunter Unit' codenamed 'INCARNATION', since I could.

She raised her finger and opened her mouth, then thought a little and said: "Fair point. Beacon starts tomorrow, correct? What are we going to do the rest of the day?"

"I have two options: we either find our younger selves and act creepy, or we hold a massive throwback barbecue." said Nora

"We were still traveling at this time in our universe, so I'd say we can act creepy tomorrow and have a massive barbecue today. Tula, you go get some good booze, me and Jaune get the food. Sun and the others can set things up here." said Ren

"Ooh, I already like being back here!" I said. This brings back so many memories. Well, not like I ever forgot them.

When I got back after visiting every single liquor store in Remnant and also getting some booze from other universes, I found a huge bonfire, grills, our old instruments, and the couches, just like it was a decade ago.

"You're back. Here, come with me." said Weiss, grabbing my hand and leading me inside. I found everyone there.

"What's this? Someone died? That shouldn't be possible…"

"Idiot. We wanted to have a toast to you. Thanks for being our friend, and husband in my case. Life with you guys is incredibly fun… Thank you." said Yang.

"Thank you, Tula. I love you, you idiot." said Ruby.

"Until now, you have kept your word: until the end of times. So, I expect you to continue sticking with us." said Weiss.

I smiled. "Hey, I thought that this last decade was enough to make such things pretty clear. I would never leave my wives. Plus, you all are like family. I would never ever leave you guys. How am I supposed to have fun alone?" I said, joking a little.

"I brought the booze, so let's toast and get this barbecue going!" I said, making all the stuff I bought appear. I literally went through every store in Remnant, so you can imagine the quantity of bottles that surrounded us.

I can assure you that the amount of alcohol could kill a few elephants, though it was just barely enough to get us tipsy, and we had to lower our tolerance to achieve that.

The next day, we woke up late in the morning. The chalet allowed us to relax more than usual, so we just let go. Normal things like a barbecue are good every once in a while.

I woke up with Merlin on my face, Rimuru melting on my chest, Yang, Ruby, Weiss, Loki, Freya, and Hinata on my sides. Aah, I can die happily now. I feel like I've already said that, probably more than once. I slept a little more. When I woke up again, Ais had snuggled in as well. No, she is my daughter, don't get strange ideas. I'm not from Alabama.

At any rate, we slowly started getting up around lunch time.

"Haven't slept that well in a while… Guess no place is like home, huh?" said Sun after coming down to the living room.

"I second that. The chalet is just our home." added Jaune.

Ren was just chilling with a peaceful face, same with me.

"Wakey wakey! It's morning! Actually lunch time! We should be getting to Beacon right about now!" started shouting Nora. Ren had flashbacks of Viet- First year.

"Mph… I really am getting second thoughts about leaving this bliss… Well, let's get presentable and go. Oh, I am getting so many ideas on how to mess with smol Weiss, Ruby, and Yang!" I said with an evil smile. Maybe a super overpowered Zwei that can talk…

After a few minutes, we were all ready to go. Amethyst, Luminous, Milim, Vados, and Leona will wait for us in the chalet. We teleported just outside of Beacon, to look at it for the first time in so many years. We all have experienced googols while evolving, so we are much older in terms of 'spirit', but Beacon will always be Beacon. We immediately spread out to find our targets. I was with my wives, Blake, Rose, and Sun, looking for the younger team RWBY.

Guess what, we found all four of them around a Dust trolley.

"Ugh, my dark past…" said Weiss, Ruby, and Blake at the same time.

Ruby went to help Ruby (young) up, Weiss prevented Weiss (young) from shaking that Dust vial, while Blake went to shut Blake (young) up.

I was trying to hold my laughter, but I really couldn't after seeing the younger girls staring at their counterparts with wide eyes.

"Pfft! Weiss, Ruby… You shouldn't scare random strangers like that." I said, attracting their attention. I then looked at the younger girls. "Sorry if my wives have scared you. May I know your names, little girls?"

"R-Ruby…"

"Weiss…"

"Oh, just like my wives, what a coincidence! I am sure we will be great friends…"

"Yeah, just great! I am going to mess with you so bad…" said Weiss to her younger self. Ruby just nodded, while her younger self smiled and was happy to have found some friends. The rest were just details.

Finally, Yang saw her older self right next to me and couldn't hold herself anymore.

"What is happening here?! Why do you guys look exactly like us?!"

"Oh, Yang… Always so quick to lose your composure."

"Hey!" said my wife, then she punched my gut.

"Anyway, you will soon discover who we are, maybe. You four should stick together. Or not, who am I to tell you what to do? See you later!"

We started walking away leaving a group of four stunned girls.

"That was a great first impression, I'd say. Creepy to the right point so that they would be spooked but not disgusted. Good job, Tula!" said Sun, nodding sagely.

"The smaller versions of us were so cute! How fun would it be to corrupt them!" said Blake

"Blake, go easy on them, I doubt they would resist your… 'Charm'." said Rose, shivering a little. Blake definitely didn't go easy on the wolf-girl.

"They were so lovable! Can't believe they will grow up to look like bombshells!" said Loki, then she looked at Ruby. "So jealous! Why am I the only flat one?!"

"Oh, dear. That's part of your charm!" I said and received a glare in response. Whatever might I have done?

We headed to the auditorium while memories kept resurfacing. It's nostalgic, you know? Our adventures started here, though in another universe.

When we arrived in the auditorium, I saw that Jaune and Pyrrha were right in front of their younger counterparts, just like Ren and Nora, so we went next to them.

"Hey there! Met your targets?" I asked, lowering my voice so that the kids wouldn't hear me. I received some nods in response, so I looked behind me and gave a smile to the future JNPR.

Oh, Ozzy's here! Let's listen to his speech for once!

"I'll...keep this brief. You have traveled here today in search of knowledge-"

"Nope."

"-to hone your craft and acquire new skills."

"Not really, just want to mess around."

"And when you have finished, you plan to dedicate your life to the protection of the people."

"Pfft! Sure, let's put it that way."

"But I look amongst you, and all I see is wasted energy, in need of purpose – direction. You assume knowledge will free you of this, but your time at this school will prove that knowledge can only carry you so far. It is up to you to take the first step."

BULLSHIT! I am the literal Incarnation of Knowledge and can say with certainty that nothing is better than that! Ugh, why did I ever decide to listen to this fucker?

"Hey, don't you think you should listen?" asked the young Pyrrha

"Oh, Pyrrha. You have no idea just how much he is wrong. Don't worry though, you will surely know in the future." I looked to her side and saw the rest of JNPR. "You four should stick together. I guarantee that you'll do great things."

That night, we refused to sleep on the floor with some kids, so we stayed just to mess around with our younger versions. Well, not mine, since I don't exist.

I saw that Ruby and Yang went towards the gloomy cat.

"Blake, Yang, Ruby… You should take care of your counterparts. I will go with Weiss to pick on her 'little sister'." I said. "Actually, we should say that we are their long-lost older siblings. That would mess with their minds nicely."

"Let's do it!" said Sun, already laughing thinking of how he can mess with his younger, stowaway self.

I found Weiss (young) preparing to go to sleep, setting up her sleeping bag. I crouched behind her and started smiling.

'Yep, she is adorable, but I already have my own Snow Angel…' I thought, looking towards my Weiss.

The young girl seemed to notice that something was off since she started looking around, before turning around. I held my finger high and booped her cheek.

"Hello there, Snow Angel. Why are you so serious? You are but a child, let loose."

She was confused and wary but said: "Look, I don't know who you are, but we should all be serious. Hunters protect humanity, not some mall like a security guard. And I have an objective, which I will accomplish."

"I see, that is very important. But, why don't you try and make some friends? They could help you with your objective. You can't do everything yourself, after all. Remember those three girls earlier in the afternoon? I know for sure that they are trying to become friends back there. Why don't you come with me and Weiss to greet them?"

"Friends, huh? I really want to know why she looks almost exactly like me. Even the scar…"

Then my Weiss took the opportunity to mess with her.

"Oh, that? Well… Why don't you call me 'big sis'? I am your older version, so why not?"

I didn't wait for her to respond since I know that the Ice Princess would never call her 'Big sis' or anything similar. I took her on my shoulder like a sack of potatoes and brought her towards Yang, Ruby, and Blake.

Their faces when they saw me handling Weiss like that were golden, while their younger versions were very confused.

I placed Young Weiss on the ground and left her to make friends, then I regrouped with the gang and went back to the chalet.

Well, I used Omniscience to hear what Young team RWBY was saying.

"So… Who thinks those guys are incredibly shady?" Yang asked, to which the three girls nodded.

"They come out of nowhere, look like us, have our names, and seem to know us well… This is really strange. The older 'Weiss' asked me to call her 'big sis', and the thing is that it didn't feel strange at all… Plus, that guy. I hate him. He's creepy." said Weiss.

"The older 'us' called him Tula. He seems to be their husband. Well, the older Blake was with another guy. And she is a Faunus…" said Ruby, looking at Blake's ribbon,

"W-well… I am a Faunus, so that is normal… But that is not important. The guy, Tula, told us two times to stick together. What should we do?"

"I will ignore that detail about you. I wouldn't mind being your… 'Friend'. Though, I'll say it now: I am the leader!" said Weiss.

"Fine, fine. As you wish, princess." said Yang

"Yay, friends!" said Ruby.

Since I wanted to spook them, I made a floating letter appear. It had 'Read me' on the outside. The four girls were scared out of their skin, but Yang took the letter nonetheless and started reading aloud: "Congratulations on becoming friends! You four don't know this yet, but you will probably face many adventurers together, a lot of hardships, a lot of fun. Stay positive and trust each other, nothing too bad will happen, I promise. - Tula, the creepy 'older brother'"

"Creepy." said the other three girls together.

Oh, fuck you too then!