11 Shopping with Gojo Satoru: A Lesson in Fashion... And Mild Threats

Disclaimer: This is a work of fan fiction based on multiple existing anime/manga series. The characters and settings used in this story belong to their respective owners and creators, and no copyright infringement is intended. This story is purely for entertainment purposes and is not intended to infringe upon any existing intellectual property. I do not own any of the original works that inspired this fanfiction, and I fully support the original creators and their works.

(This chapter is sponsored by... Gojo Satoru. Yes, that's right, he's one of those people who'd force *COUGH* Pay someone to write a story about him.)

Onto the story...

-Story Start-

-Third Person POV-

Finding clothes that would fit Satoru was of no issue.

Clothes, coats, and much more being torn is a common occurrence in this Monster Infested World.

Moreso when you are in a swordsman's wet dream of a town.

Where duels and spars are prominent.

And more prominent is the slashing and tearing of clothes as a subsequent result of said duels and spars.

Thus, it isn't much of an issue to find merchants and salesmen who procure and sell clothes for the common folk of the town, who are all swordsmen in one way or another.

The real issue, at least In Alistair's eyes was to find something that would fit Satoru's rather foreign look in terms of style when they arrived in front of the Clothes and Wears Stand.

It was a new temporary stand, and Alistair decided it was worth checking out for both Satoru and himself.

Satoru, to Alistair's surprise, was polite, cordial, and casual with the Salesman as he picked something out for Satoru.

"What?" Satoru smirked at Alistair's bewildered expression.

Alistair's eyes narrowed in suspicion, "You're acting... Normal, even proper." He stated as if the Satoru in front of him was an imposter.

Satoru shrugged with a smirk, "He'll be an important contributor to my looks," he announced with a pose, pointing a thumb at himself in sheer pride and grace. "I can't have him give me something hideous that will tarnish my unparalleled handsomeness. It's only right to treat him with respect!" Satoru couldn't help but emphasize.

Satoru broke out of his pose to add another self-stroking compliment, "Not that it really matters, I'll look good in anything~!" He flashed a cheeky grin.

'I spoke too soon...' Alistair deadpanned, but later relented and gave a small chuckle and helpless shake of his head at Satoru's self-assured and amusing character.

In the Holy Land Of Swords - Clothes simply serve a practical purpose, their practicality comes first.

Comfort and especially warding against the cold.

Alistair's emphasis on the importance of fitting style and good appearance is unmistakably a concept etched into his psyche from his times as a member of the nobility.

Clothes maketh man or something.

Sure, Practicality is most important in his eyes - The biting Cold shouldn't be torturing you just so you can look good.

But why pick one when you can have both by paying a bit of extra cash?

'Though even if we don't find something practical for Gojo it should be fine as long as it looks good on him... He seems, unbothered by the cold.' Alistair thought to himself in slight amusement, as he glared at Satoru's current uncouth, soon-to-be proper appearance.

Noting the fact that Satoru has a way to keep the biting cold from affecting him much.

Or at all.

After a few minutes of waiting, the Salesman arrived with a set of black colored clothes, a shirt and pants.

"Try it on! Tell me what you think!" The Salesman encouraged as he handed the shaded Satoru the shirt and pants.

Satoru took them in hand and began to undress without a moment's hesitation.

Alistair, man of the hour - disappointed a few of the female onlookers by blocking the view.

Deciding to spare the sight from the fair ladies in the close vicinity of the Commerce Area who were about to bear witness to a bare Satoru.

And the definition of "Fair Ladies" seemed to be a bit inaccurate.

...Sword-equipped, likely illiterate, musclebrain, aggressive, and more times than Alistair would like to admit - Charged up to the max with Libido as swordswomen.

On second thought, Alistair wasn't protecting the innocence of the "Fair Ladies" from the sight of a naked Satoru.

Nay, he was protecting Satoru's chastity from the hungry cougars.

...It is uncertain if Infinity can block those.

"So~?" A full-on Cheshire grin was on the merchant's face as he pointed at a decently sized pool of water he was periodically heating up so it wouldn't freeze.

Satoru wordlessly moved to check himself out and hummed pleased, "Not bad~"

Satoru, now properly dressed, was pleased.

No longer was Satoru a primitive barbarian jungle man.

No!

'Gojo Satoru is now a functioning member of... Whatever the society of this world is called!' Satoru proclaimed in his mind proudly, as he posed in front of the makeshift mirror.

"Not bad indeed. You look good Gojo!" Alistair gave Satoru a thumbs-up.

Satoru ignored Alistair's compliment as he was mesmerized and grinning smugly at... His own reflection.

A little bit of confidence and self-love goes a long way, right?

...Alistair wasn't too sure this was the case for Satoru.

Alistair decidedly ignored this gesture for now and fixed his gaze onto the grinning merchant

"How much for those two?" Alistair pointed at Satoru's clothing.

"6 Asuran Gold Coins for the pants, and 2 Asuran Gold Coins for the shirt." The merchant readily admitted the "fair" price.

Currency was one of the main concepts etched into Satoru's mind when Alistair for the most part, with assistance from Relna educated the "Primitive" Satoru.

From basic examples that Relna once provided, Satoru translated the value of this Land's currency for his convenience:

Asura Gold Coin is equivalent to 100,000 Yen.

Asura Silver Coin is equivalent to 10,000 Yen.

Asura Large Copper Coin is equivalent to 1,000 Yen.

Asura Copper Coin is equivalent to 100 Yen.

As such, Satoru raised an eyebrow at that large of a price point.

'Isn't that a lot?' Satoru fiddled with the picture in his mind.

He was unsure, as he still lacked a proper picture and examples of what is valuable in this world.

A pound of wheat here, for example, could be worth a hefty amount of gold.

Whilst back in Japan, a pound of wheat would be worth chump change.

Satoru still lacks perspective.

Anywho.

The one supposed to pay the said price - Alistair, his jaw nearly hit the floor, only to be stopped by collecting himself.

Well, fair pricing - This is what Alistair assumes, nevertheless, Merchants are known crooks. It is best to question the pricing before purchase.

It is only logical to do so.

Alistair smiled politely and easily, "Is there a reason behind these prices, good sir?" He inquired.

Slight skepticism radiated from Alistair's posed question, despite the polite smile.

'Decent-looking clothes wouldn't cost this much unless made with expensive materials or by a well-known and sponsored tailor' Was the thought that rang aloud in Alistair's mind.

The merchant huffed confidently, "I'm glad you asked, friend! It's made with Fenris Fur! An S-Rank monster from the Demon Continent! Its fur is fire-resistant and good against the elements! Be it cold or hot! Furthermore, it is as tough as an Alpha Luster Grizzlies Hide! The pricing is only fair considering the transportation and difficulty of acquiring such fine material! What do you say?" The merchant went through the explanation thoroughly, as if he'd been preparing the answer for a while.

Alistair, fell into a contemplative silence as he digested the explanation and checked through the validity of such a claim.

A conclusion formed, 'Two things stand out to me here. First, the pricing should be higher were it to be Fenris Fur. Tailoring opportunities for such a material does not come to just anyone. Only some of the finest Tailors enjoy the luxury of using it. I, myself know having seen and worn such cloth. In addition, not much of it is salvageable considering the difficulty of taking down such a beast. The pricing should edge around the 15-20 Asuran Gold Coins, not something commoners can pay. Secondly, Fenris's fur by its looks, does not appear like what Satoru is currently wearing, despite how exemplary it looks.'

'The only conclusion is simple. This is the other side of the world from the Demon Continent's mountain ranges that are the habitat of the Fenris Wolf, people rarely see something like Fenris Fur. Despite appearances, the Holy Land Of Swords is wealthy and those who are of Sword Saint rank and above are also of the same scale of material wealth. A scam for these knuckleheaded, wealthy, illiterate, and lacking in financial smarts swordsmen seems likely and perhaps easy... Only the Town Mayor, nobles, people who are merchants or former merchants, and Master Gal usually sniff these scams out.' Alistair concluded in slight disappointment.

Alistair sighed vocally, 'Another scam stand... Don't they learn?'

As Alistair was about to open his mouth to chastise the Snakeoil salesman a loud and surprised squeak came out of the merchant.

Alistair blinked and in front of him was the merchant and Satoru being dangerously close to each other.

Satoru's dark shades penetrate deep into the Merchant's eyes, who gets more nervous that he can't see Satoru's own eyes to try and probe Satoru's emotions.

The merchant forms a nervous smile as sweatdrops form on his forehead, "E-Erm is something the matter, friend?" He questions the tall and intimidating man who's at a kissing distance from him.

...Pretty strange that such a thought crossed the merchant's mind, but whatever.

"Are you lying to us?" Satoru asked with chilling cold, glaring through his shades at the merchant and surprising both the merchant and Alistair.

The merchant's nervousness skyrocketed, but he tried his best to remain firm in the face of the intimidating man inches away from him, "N-N-No, sir!" The merchant doubled down, despite the rather obvious lie.

If before Satoru's glare was freezing cold, now, it was downright subzero. Killing intent was clearly radiated.

A strange pressure began to press on the Merchant's shoulders and chest as he was about to collapse.

"Gojo! Don't kill hi-" Alistair began to panic as well, forgetting prior to Satoru's threat that he was just as Eris described him.

Very Dangerous.

And perhaps that is not even the tip of the iceberg.

But, as sudden as the tense atmosphere came, it left just as suddenly, the Merchant's shoulders and chest were now free of all pressure, "That's good! It'd be a shame if you did lie... Oh~? You want me to take these for free~?" Satoru said with a cheerful smile as he backed off the personal space of the merchant.

Both the merchant and Alistair breathed a sigh of relief.

The merchant, heard something odd in Satoru's statement, his prior nervousness now turned relief was exchanged into pure confusion, he proceeded to pose a question, "I never mentioned these would be fre-" Only to be cut off and promptly shut up by Satoru's subzero glare returning.

The merchant got the message this time, "I-It's all yours, friend! Take it!" He mumbled out, nearly soiling himself.

The pressure once again dissipated, "How generous~! Thanks! I'll be sure to come back for some more shopping! A benevolent salesman is someone I can get along with~!" Satoru praised and thanked the salesman, his carefree smirk carried not a hint of a threat.

The merchant, seemed quick to the uptake as he got the message of that one as well, "I-I'm sorry... I'll be leaving for Sharia in a few days... So I'm afraid I won't be able to experience your exquisite patronage."

Satoru smiled in faux disappointment, "Aww... Well, good luck with your travels! If perchance you see a glowing blue orb on your way there... Make sure you run away okay~? I'd hate it if a kind merchant such as yourself gets... Mildly injured~!" Satoru waved goodbye to the disturbed and distressed merchant, making his way out of the temporary stand with his newly acquired clothes on him, accompanied by a bewildered and yet amused Alistair.

"Did you have to take it for free? I planned on calling him out on his scheme and intending to pay a fair price for your clothes - which are more than likely made out of Charred Boar's Hide down in Northern Begarrito, the price of that shouldn't exceed 8 Asuran Silver Coins for both the pants and shirt. 1 Asuran Gold Coin if we're generous and taking into account that we are a year's worth of travel away from where these Boars originate from." Alistair questioned innocently, adding an explanation of the clothing Satoru wore as he grabbed a sleeve of Satoru's shirt to examine it.

The rugged and slightly warm feeling of the hide, contrasted with its smoothness and midnight black coloring - Characteristic of Charred Boar's Hide.

Satoru shrugged in amusement, pulling away from Alistair, "I don't know what you're talking about~ He gave it to me out of the goodness of his heart!"

Satoru seemed touched by the kind merchant's gift.

"Pfft, Hahahaha! ... At least you didn't kill him. I feared the worst there, Gojo." Alistair broke out into laughter, only to chastise Satoru slightly to not kill others... Unnecessarily. 

'Which he thankfully didn't do.' Alistair couldn't help but add in his thoughts.

Satoru threw Alistair an odd look as they entered the street where the Inn Alistair recommended was located, "Why would I kill such a kind man?" Satoru asked with a genuinely confused look.

Alistair deadpanned at him, "Alright, I get it. I'll drop the subject." 

-Scene Change-

In the bustling heart of the Holy Land Of Swords lay an establishment that served as both an inn and a tavern. The atmosphere was one of relaxation - A place frequented by swordsmen from various races, travelers, and the various merchants, envoys, or visitors.

The sound of clinking glasses and the smacking of wood by the seemingly drunk men and women in the dining hall of this establishment rang aloud to its entirety.

It makes one wonder how the guests who stay here even sleep at night.

...This point is further reinforced by the fact it isn't even evening and they are already intoxicated.

It is safe to assume this scene is only enhanced when the sun's down.

Anyways.

The receptionist's counter was adorned with a tall white-haired man with shades leaning on it, wearing a bored expression.

Next to him, a blond-haired man was deep in conversation with the receptionist.

As the receptionist counted out Asuran Large Copper Coins along with three Asuran Silver Coins, the white-haired man's disinterest was evident, reflecting the establishment's primary purpose.

"Alright! It adds up to a month's worth of stay here! Here's the key to the room, breakfast and lunch are free! Drinks aren't on the house though, so you better pay up! Ya hear?" The attractive, rather tomboyish, and Sword-equipped receptionist cheerfully said as she handed Alistair the key to the requested room.

It is important to note that this receptionist is one of the rare few who are literate and not completely monkey-brained in this town of sword-swinging meatheads.

"You got that, Gojo? No drinking without paying!" Alistair drew Satoru's attention by dropping the room key in front of his bored face, which had been in intimate contact with the reception table.

A swift, "I don't drink" was uttered out of Satoru's mouth, only for his attention to be grabbed by the dropped key.

Oh and how important it is!

Satoru's eyes narrowed at the key.

Satoru's keen nose for mischief got a whiff of another opportunity.

Satoru knew that Alistair had permanent lodging in the Sword God's Main Dojo.

Nevertheless, when Satoru senses an opportunity, a chance, to cause a little mischief.

Who is he to say no?

"Alistair, why is there only one key?" Satoru questioned innocently

Alistair mirrored Satoru's expression, "What do you mean why? It's for a room in the Inn. Enlighten me on the reason as to why we would come here if not for that?"

Satoru ignored his question... To give another of his own, "So, this room... How many beds are there?"

"Only one! Dear Customer! Any more would require additional payment!" The tomboyish receptionist pointed a finger at the contemplating, whimsical, albino shade-wearing monkey.

Satoru stroked his chin at the revelation the receptionist gave him, "I see, I see..."

Alistair's confusion was painted ever so clearly on his face at whatever Satoru was cooking up in that eccentric head of his.

And Alistair's disappointment was also evident when Satoru...

"You'll make me blush~ Kya~!" The eccentric teen faux blushed as he insinuated that Alistair's intentions weren't exactly... Pure.

...The Narrator has had enough of this guy.

So...

To Be Continued! 

-Author Note Start-

Yo, people!

I've been feeling a little goofy

So here's the new chapter!

Did it come out early?

No, it didn't!

Did I say it would come out early and quickly?

Yes!

Did I lie?

Of course, I did!

Hope this chapter was to your satisfaction - The next chapters gonna be Gojo's decisions and contemplations on his next move so to speak.

So do stay tuned for that!

If the pacing isn't to yer liking, then Sorry.

It's not something I'm good at - and I'd like to develop each place Gojo goes to.

Whether minor or major.

Anyways! Most importantly! Did I portray Teen Gojo well in this chapter? I'd appreciate feedback on this on each chapter! As this is the most critical part of the fic! Woohoo! Feedback! Yup.

Question for the people:

(1) Burger with no Tomatoes? (Facts!)

(2) Burger with Tomatoes? (Blasphemy!)

(3) I'm vegan? (Politically correct!)

(4) Write another chapter you peasant? (Leave me alone!)

Have a nice day!

-Author Note End-