Chapter three

Music was the true definition of therapy.

It didn't matter how bad one felt; put the right song on and you would feel like you were floating among the clouds or even drowning at sea, whichever way one wanted to put it.

Richie Rod was my therapy.

As I listened to his song "Blank Heart," all my negative emotions were immediately washed away. My head continued to bob up and down as I could feel the bass of his music in my heart. The rhythm was practically similar to my heartbeat.

It's been three days since my mom left for Boston, and I have not spoken to her since then. Yeah, I know what you are thinking. I am a shitty son, and I knew that already. But I just couldn't bring myself to speak to her, not after what I did.

I know she probably hates me now.

I was currently in the library studying for a test that was due in three days. I think I was the only one here apart from Miss Elizabeth, the librarian. But she was asleep, so that didn't really count.

I raised my watch to check the time, and it was time for the second period. I packed up my things in a haste and took off my AirPods, but the moment I did, something immediately caught my ears.

Sobbing.

I had been in the library all morning, and there was no one inside when I came in, and I could bet on my life that I didn't see anyone come in. But it really wasn't any of my business. Slinging my bag over my shoulder, I decided to ignore the cries of whoever it was and head for my next class.

But my feet froze at the library entrance. It felt as though the strings of my heart were being pulled back. My curiosity got the better of me, and I found myself retracing my steps.

I walked past every aisle and once I got to the last one my eyes landed on a pair of swollen silver eyes.

Cassy Miller was staring straight at me, and like always when I was around her, I was paralyzed. Once she saw that I wasn't going to make any moves, her face immediately morphed from one of sadness to that of anger.

"What are you staring at?!" She snapped, and I unconsciously flinched from her tone. She must have caught my actions because her head fell to her hands and her shoulders began to tremble. With a shaky voice, she said, "I'm sorry."

I found myself shaking my head and walking towards her. I was actually approaching Cassy Miller; even though Brad wasn't here, I could still see his angry eyes staring right at me and his desire to rip out my heart.

I sat beside Cassy on the seat next to her and said, "No, I'm sorry I was just surprised to see you here." I was probably staring at her like a lunatic because my eyes were as wide as saucers. I couldn't help it though—it was hard to believe that I was talking to the girl I had a crush on for three years for the first time. She was always surrounded by her numerous friends and terrifying boyfriend. I never really had the guts to walk up to her and say hi.

Cassy straightened her back and brought her hand to her face to wipe at the tears. "Oh, here," I said, offering her the tissue I always carried around in my bag.

"Thanks," she said to me before wiping away her tears and blowing her nose. I watched with awe as she bunched up the used tissue and made a perfect shot into the trash can situated at the far end of the isle.

She was so cool.

We sat together in silence, and I could tell she was getting uncomfortable from the way she tapped her foot on the floor. "So, what made you so upset?" It was probably none of my business, but I was curious, not to mention worried.

She looked down at her hands on her thighs, and I found myself doing the same. My eyes were suddenly glued to her exposed, creamy-tanned thighs. Cassy wore a black skirt that stopped just above her mid-thigh and a crop top that left little to the imagination. Her skin was so smooth; I really hoped I would get the chance to touch it someday.

I don't mean that in a weird or perverted way or anything. Maybe just a hug or a handshake or something... God, I was such a loser.

"It's nothing," Cassy said, perhaps a bit too quickly for that matter. "I should get going. I have chemistry now."

I watched as she attempted to get up, and my hand reached out to grab her wrist, but I quickly retracted it. And as always, she caught the movement. Nothing ever went past her.

"No, please. I…I am worried," I know I sounded weird and dumb. When I said I hated the fact that I was socially awkward, I meant it.

She looked at me with those eyes that always showed up in my dreams; when her head tilted to the side, I was starting to wonder if she saw me as crazy. But then she said, "It's really stupid and lame." I couldn't stop my eyes from going to her hypnotizing pink lips as she pouted them.

"If it could make you cry, I highly doubt it is. Tell me," I said softly, and I didn't miss the way the corners of her lips lifted a bit.

Did I do that?

Was I really about to make Cassy Miller smile?

My fifteenth birthday wish was finally coming true!

"Umm, It's this artist. " don't know if you know him," she started, her hesitation evident.

"What's his name?"

"Richard Rodney," she answered. My eyes probably looked like they were about to bulge out of their sockets.

"You mean Richie Rod?" I asked, and she looked at me with surprise.

"Umm, yeah! Oh my God, you know him?" She asked with disbelief in her tone.

"Know him? I practically live for him!" I took out my phone from my bag and showed her my favorite playlist; they were all songs from Richie Rod.

"Wow," she said as she took my phone from my hands.

I was going to pin that phone to my bedroom wall.

"Yeah, he's my idol," I said sheepishly, and I knew I was grinning like a lunatic.

"Mine too; I've loved him ever since I was nine when he released his first song, Blank Heart." She handed me back my phone, and I honestly couldn't believe that I was actually having a conversation with Cassy Miller. I wanted to punch myself, but I honestly wasn't ready to wake up yet.

"That's my personal favorite," I said, and we fell into another moment of silence. "So why were you crying about him?"

She frowned at me, and I regretted asking that question if I knew it would warrant such a reaction from her. "I thought you said you were a fan."

"I am!" I defended quickly.

She pulled out her phone and began to swipe through it before showing me an article. The headlines had my heart dropping all the way to my stomach.

Richie Rod was missing.

"He's been missing for three days now, and no one knows a thing about his whereabouts," Cassy stated as she retracted her phone and put it back in her Versace bag.

I wanted to slam my head against a nearby wall.

Here I was wallowing in my own misery, not knowing that the man who had indirectly helped me through most of it was missing.

"I... I had no idea," I sighed, my head falling to my hands as I tried to get my bearings.And I couldn't afford to be selfish right now; Cassy is obviously way more upset about his disappearance than I was about him. "But don't worry, I'm sure he'll turn up soon." I reassured.

"I hope so," she said with a sigh before rising to her feet. She began to walk away, and just before she was completely out of sight, she stopped and said, "Don't tell anyone we had this conversation. For your safety and mine."

And she was gone.