Chapter six

The night was dead, cold, and lonely, exactly how I liked it. I had to admit that the house felt weird without my mom. She was always here since it was just the two of us. Maybe I should….. No, it's too early to call her. I need to remember what a terrible son I am.

But I miss her.

I wanted to talk to her, I wanted to tell her how tired of life I was. I wanted to tell her that I only did what I did to her because I wanted the world to see me as a cool person, and not the nerd title that seems to follow me all the way to my grave. I am not one to open up about my feelings, but once in a while, sometimes a year, I do. And my mom has always been that person who listens.

My eyes were starting to sting.

God, I was so weak.

No, I really had to talk to her.

With a sigh of defeat, I pull out my phone from my pocket before flinging my bag across the living room. I stared at the number I knew all too well for only God knows how long. I was not even sure of what it was I was going to say, but it was now or never. I dialed her number and held the phone to my ear.

It went straight to voicemail.

Okay, that was weird.

My mom never lets my calls go to voicemail; she never even switches off her phone due to the fear of me needing her urgent attention. Since my dad died three years ago, my mom has done everything in her power to make sure I was always her top priority, and she has made sure that she was always there for me.

These thoughts were making me regret what I did to her even more.

I tried calling her again, but like the first time, it was sent straight to voicemail. I am left with only two possibilities: either she did not want to speak to me or something terrible had happened to her phone.

Or her.

I shook away the last thought because I sincerely did not want to believe that. If that were true, I had no idea how I would take it. So I decided to go with the first theory and give her some space. I will just leave a note. Hopefully she will listen to it when she is no longer upset.

"Hey, mom. Umm, I am sorry for not calling earlier. I wasn't sure how to approach you after the way I behaved. I really am sorry about that. I was just... you were embarrassing me, and everyone was watching. I would have been made a fool of, and I really want the remaining three months I have left in high school to be memorable….." I dragged out, and my hands went up to my hair. "Still, it is no excuse. I am really sorry. I hope you are having fun on your trip and the sales are okay."

I sent it and dropped my phone on the nearest couch.

It felt good to get that off my chest.

I jugged up the stairs and quickly freshened up. It was hard getting my clothes off with all the aches and bandages, but I finally got the hang of it. As I washed my face, I could have sworn I heard a knock on the door. But it was almost seven p.m. and I wasn't expecting anyone. It was probably just in my head.

My hair was dripping with water as I came out of the bathroom in a pair of grey basketball shorts. I would like to believe I looked manly, if not sexy. But there was nothing sexy about the way I screamed when my eyes fell on someone sitting on my bed.

And that someone was Cassy Miller.

She still had on the same outfit as earlier today. Her eyes scanned through one of my comics, flipping the pages lazily as she said, "I knocked, but you didn't answer and there was no doorbell. I thought you had fallen asleep or you weren't home."

My hand was perched atop my chest as I tried to calm my racing heart. "How did you get in?"

She pointed towards my open window without taking her eyes off the comic. I couldn't believe how careless I'd been; if Cassy had been a robber or serial killer, who knows if I'd still be alive. But I am not going to let my mind go there.

My eyes were practically glued to Cassy. She had one foot on my bed and the other dangling off the edge. With the short skirt she was wearing, her posture wasn't leaving much to the male imagination. But I refused to be swooned. The events of the past hours were still freshly engraved in my memory.

And the emotions were still in my heart.

It was probably why my tone had changed into a defensive and somewhat annoyed one. "Why are you here?"

She must have noticed the change in the air because she had chosen that moment to drop the comic and meet my eyes. For a fraction of a second, they were as wide as saucers. They trailed down my wet hair to my face and torso before pulling them all the way back up to align my eyes. There was something about the way she licked her lips that set my heart ablaze, but I did my best not to show it.

"I wanted to make sure you were okay," she said softly, dropping the comic on my bed before coming to stand before me.

She was almost taller than me.

God, she was perfect.

I hate the fact I still admired her after what she did to me. Is there a chance I am possessed or under some spell?

My thoughts were contradictory to my words and actions. The laugh that left my lips was bitter: "Oh, after kicking me in the face and knocking me out?" I asked sarcastically, and I could see her flinch slightly from my words. Regret swirled within her beautiful silver eyes, and I was happy I was capable of making her feel something.

"I am sorry." She whispered after a moment of silence. Her head hung in what I assumed was shame, but that was an emotion I doubted someone like her could feel.

"I'd appreciate it more if you said that in front of the people you humiliated me in front of," I said, keeping my face as stoic as possible. I was doing an incredible job at hiding my excitement.

Cassy Miller was in my room, and we were the only ones home, and it was night.

Oh god, oh god, oh god.

But I had to admit that her next words hurt like hell. "I can't," she said, making me frown.

"And why is that?" I asked, even though I already knew the answer.

"I can't apologize to someone like you," she spat out, and damn, it hurt more than I anticipated. It felt like every word was a stab at my heart.

"Someone like me," I repeated, my eyes were probably glazing over and I really despised my weakness. "Thanks for coming all the way out here to tell me that."

Her eyes widened in what appeared to be panic, and she took a step towards me, but I took one back and said, "Please leave." I said, pointing towards the window she had crawled out of.

"Jeremy—" wow, she knows my name; "please, I did not mean it like—"

"I know what you meant; now please leave. I do not even want to think of what Brad would do if he found out you were here," I said, and I saw the consideration of my words on her features. The thought of Brad finding out about this terrified us both.

She stared at me for a while, and I decided to ignore her. I walked towards my study desk in the corner and grabbed one of my math textbooks. I sat down, turning back on her and focusing on the numbers and statistics before me. I had to give it to her though; she was practically a ninja. Because the next time I glanced behind me, she was gone.