6 Operation Get Over Christian

The days seemed to pass slowly after he left. I didn't know what to do with myself. I was baking for god's sake. Mama and Charlie were worried, so was Ciara. I would do nothing stupid. I just felt like I had lost my best friend. Call me overdramatic, but I was in real life pain over this boy. I mean, everything seemed perfect, and then just like that, it was snatched away from me. Summer was ending, and Mama was talking about moving. If we moved, I may never see him again. I couldn't believe his mom had forbidden him from seeing me. Mama says if it's meant to be, he'll come back, but I'm not so sure. His mom was pissed, and I had yet to hear from him. Maybe it wasn't meant to be.

*****

Three weeks later,

The operation gets over. Christian was underway and working just fine. The summer was almost over, so I and the girls were spending more time shopping at the malls and hanging out as much as we could before the school year started. I still missed him every day, but I felt like it was time to move forward. I couldn't continue to hold on to a dream that may never come to fruition. However, the unofficial breakup was killing me.

What better way to get un-depressed than going to the mall, right? So, we did. We spent hours there. I didn't buy much, just mostly walked around. My friends were wild and goofy. They had no chill, but they kept me laughing. It was fun, but I felt like I was wearing a mask, like they couldn't really see me. Every tall, light-skinned boy looked like him. From the corner of my eye I saw him a millions times, only to realize it was not Christian.

I had just gotten home, and my mama was in the kitchen cooking while I went straight to my room to put up my new clothes, smiling as I stood in front of my mirror and held up the different outfits I had just bought when the phone rang. Immediately, my heart skipped a beat, and I held my breath, waiting for some sign that once again never came. Quickly, I shook it off and continued putting away my clothes.

Then in walked my mother cordless phone to her ear. She was smiling, or really it was more of a smirk and nodding her head. She said nothing, just a bunch of "um hums" and "Hums". Since she had come into my room, I figured it had to have something to do with me, so I patiently waited for her to get on with it. A part of me, a part I didn't want to acknowledge, prayed for some news from Christian, even if it was just to say he was okay. I needed so type of closure.

Mama sat on my bed and continued her conversation. I listened intensely. "Well, I can understand how you feel," she said, "and mother to mother, I will let you know if I see him."

"Um-hum mm," she said after a brief pause. "Okay, and you too."

She finally hung up and lifted an eyebrow at me, still smirking. "Guess who that was?"

I hunched my shoulders. I seriously did not know. I was guessing not the call I was waiting for, since she hadn't handed me the phone.

"That was Christian's mom." She said after a moment.

My heart dropped as I hoped he was okay. Operation get-over Christian is currently on standby. "Is he okay?" I asked.

"He snapped on her ass. She tried to put him on punishment. Said he couldn't leave the house, unplugged all the phones, and wouldn't let him even go to the store. So, when she was gone, he found the phone and tried to call you, but she caught him, and he snapped. She said he went completely off on her, broke her fish tank, and left the house. She does not know where he's at and she wants me to call her if he comes by." Mom said.

My chest was tight, and it took me a couple of minutes to realize I was holding my breath. I let it out in a whoosh and looked at my mom. "Are you going to call her if he comes by? Do you think he'll come here?"

I realized I didn't want my mom to call her if he came here. I didn't like his mom. She came off as a bitch. Not to mention she doesn't like me. Still, I felt kind of bad that he had flipped on his mom. I would be six feet under if I broke anything in my mom's house. Still, I couldn't help the wave of protectiveness I felt for him.

"Anna, I'm going to have to call her if he comes to see you. He's still a minor and his mom must be worried sick. I mean, she called me. After the way she acted when we met, she must be worried." She said, hugging me. "I saw how close you all got over the summer and let me tell your first love can be the most important thing to a teenager. Mark my words," she said, standing up, "he will find his way here."

She walked out of the room, but I was staring at the wall, the picture of us. The picture we took at union station on our first date. It was a strip of five pictures. Some were goofy, and in two, we just smiled. On the last one, though, we had kissed. Love? Was that even a factor in this situation? Is that why it was so hard to get over him? Was I in love with Christian? I lay on my bed and fell asleep with those thoughts floating around in my head.

"Annett!" My mom called from somewhere in the house. I jumped straight out of my sleep, my heart beating fast. The dream I had was weird as fuck. I had a dreamed someone was holding a gun to my face. I was looking down the barrel. I wiped the sweat from my face and got up from my bed. I shook off the disorientation I felt from waking so abruptly. As the horrifying feelings faded, I went in search of my mom.

I made it to the living room only to stop in my tracks. The epitome of my thoughts standing right in front of me. Christian. He hadn't been in the dream, but it was like he had been in the back of my mind while looking down at the barrel of the gun. I had been worried about him. I had felt him close and now he was standing in my living room.

Damn, was he looking good. With his jeans riding low and a wife-beater on that did nothing to stop my bad, bad thoughts, I only stared at him. As I looked at his face, he smiled. And then I knew.... I did, in fact, love him. From his now nappy Afro to those dreamy chocolate eyes, to those jacked-up teeth. I loved him and I did not know what to do about it.

*****

Christian

I had to see her. After weeks of dealing with my mom, I couldn't take it anymore. I mean, did she seriously expect me to stay cooped up in a house with her until school started, when all I wanted to do was see Anna? I don't think so. That was some bullshit, and she knew it now. I had left this time for good. I had talked to my aunt, and she said it was fine if I stayed with her. What my moms didn't understand was that Anna was my peace.

For years, I had dealt with her being an alcoholic. Drunk as hell. That's when she thought I was her personal punching bag. I can't remember how many times I had dodged a bottle being thrown at my head. There was no breathing room at her house. I walked around on eggshells, afraid of my mother, afraid that she would try to kill me.

The punches hadn't fazed me, neither had all the cuts from the bottles. I was twelve when I found out my mom smoked crack. That was one of the first times I had flipped out on her. She had wanted me to go get her more drugs. I had refused, and she threw the bottle. I had thrown a lamp, not at her but a wall. Those actions had only driven me towards the streets. They made me seek comfort elsewhere.

The first time I had gone to get her drugs, the dealer had taken one look at me and welcomed me to his crew. I welcomed every punch when I was jumped in. They were nothing compared to what I had faced at the hand of my mother. They taught me everything, and the next time my mom needed her to fix, I already had it.

When I left her house this morning, my first stop had been my aunts. Then here, a few houses down from my aunts to see the only face I've been thinking of for days. Anna supplied a peace even the streets couldn't. It was with her I found everything I was looking for all these years. It hit me like a ton of bricks a few days ago that I couldn't let this end like that. So much left unsaid and so much left undone. Naw, it would not happen like that. I was keeping her.

I looked at my girl, her eyes shining like she was about to cry, and all I wanted was to hug her, kiss her, tell her how much I missed her and what I went through to be here. I never told her much about my family. About the fact that my dad was a dead beat crack head and that my mom was that and more. With all the good I saw in her, where did that ever fit into any of our conversations? I would tell her now and I would let her know I would never leave her again. Never. As hard as I think I am. I don't think I could take it.

I loved her, and nothing was ever going to come between us again. I smiled harder when her mama walked out of the room and in two steps, I was in front of her. She was trying her best and failing at holding back her tears. I leaned down and kissed her, just a peck, and then she jumped into my arm, hugging me tightly.

"You bastard." She suddenly said, jumping down. "For real, you couldn't at least have tried to call me. I was so worried."

I pulled her back close to me. This little thing never ceases to amaze me. Who knew a little chocolate five foot nothing would be the one to bring me to my knees? "I would have if I could have Anna. Believe me, I tried. My bird, just a little on the crazy side, had a nigga feeling like I was twenty-four-hour lock-down or some shit."

She grabbed my afro and pulled me down to her height. "Don't you ever do that again?" She said, looking serious.

I laughed and straightened up. "No way in hell. I'm moving in down the street, so we will be seeing each other like we used to and I'm not leaving ever again. You're stuck with me" I meant every word.