Reality Checks

Elijah...

I nod at her, wondering what is it that she is about to say next and that she expects will offend me.

She takes a long breath and says,"I really think you should think about shifting. You see..." before she can continue I get up and sit straight on the couch.

"What do you mean shifting? Like changing the house?" The expression on her face gives me my answer. "Uhhhh... What are you talking about Eve? I can't do this. This house, these memories is all I have left of her. I can't leave her behind. This is my home. She is my home." I say, getting a bit agitated, trying to make my point. Evelyn suddenly stood up. The heel of her shoe knocking the floor with every step that she takes. She is heading towards the kitchen. A shrilling voice echoes from the inside of the room.

"Care to join me here, Eli?" I walk inside and see her holding a white tupperware box in front of an open refrigerator. That's the box that contained the white gravy pasta. The last thing that Scarlett ever made for me. I watch her remove the lid and in a moment the entire is filled with a stinky, sour, bitter smell. All in all, it smelled like rotten eggs, that too left to rott for months. Whole of the box is covered with a green fungi, which has now turned black in some of the areas. Evelyn breaks the silence,"Do you see this? What is this box doing in the fridge Eli? Why is it even here after all these months?" She asks. I can't help but avoid the edge of her tone and accusations in her eyes. I don't even know what I did wrong.

"I don't know Eve. I just forgot about it." I say with a shrug. Why are we even having this conversation in the first place.

"You forgot that there is a box... NO! a stinking box in your fridge breeding bacterias and fungi still unknown to science?" a question lingering in her eyes. I am getting sick. When I don't answer she continues,"You remember Elijah? We actually ate this pasta together. Now that I stand here, With this box in my hand, I can't seem to remember what it actually tasted like on my tongue. Somehow this stink has managed to ruin that very assence and aroma of the pasta not just in this box, but also in my memories. It's not happy anymore. I am not happy remebering it's taste anymore. It makes me want to puke." The moment she finishes, I look up and there it is all. I can see it.

I sprint towards the bathroom and vomit my guts out. It's just soo....

I have no control over the tears now. If they want to get out, they can. I don't have the strength to stop them. When I enter back into the kitchen, after cleaning up a bit, Eve is still there. But now the box is in sink filled with soap water and she is standing there looking at me, with arms crossed in front of her.

"I don't have to step into your bedroom to tell that Scarlett's nightsuit is still hanging on the handle of her closet. That her journal is still on her night stand with a few printed papers spilling out if it. Or that her perfume bottle is still there on the the dressing table, it's lid lying open beside it." she says. This time her voice a bit softer. "You know what this means Eli, don't you?"

"What's so wrong with it? I don't want to change anything in this house. It is our home. I want everything to be the way she left it. I already gave away almost all of her belongings. It makes me feel like she is still here, when I see all these things." I snap back. Why can't she understand?

"Except that she is not, is she? The house stails. It stinks. So are going to be your memories of her in a few years if you keep it like this. Why can't you accept that she is gone Elijah Ross? Huh? She is not coming back. There is no way you can bring her back. So stop waiting. SHE IS DEAD. DEAD."

"Don't say that. Please don't say that. It is so cruel" I cry out kneeling on the ground.

"Yes it is. But it is true, isn't it? Do you remember while eating the pasta from this box was the first time you actually laughed after the funeral? How we talked about her cooking skills? We were remembering her in a good way. It was like she was there among us. Now look at this box and tell me if it reminds you of that laughing, cheerful Scarlett. Because it sure doesn't for me. Do you think that keeping things just the way she did is going to keep things the same? It won't. Because it looks nothing the same. The house has lost it's freshness, it's light, it's warmth and most importantly, it has lost that feeling of home. Nothing's the same. It will never be. Things have changed and you can't do anything about it. Unless, of course you actually intend to keep them just like they were. Do you unterstand me? " she kneels beside me, placing her hand under my chin. Forcing me to look up. Her left eyebrow raised in a challenging way.

"Yes." it comes out in a whisper as a I close my eyes. She is right. The moment she hears my answer, I am engulfed in her arms. This time she doesn't cry with me. She has always been the stronger one.

"Then stop confining Scarlett in these life less things. There is only one place where you can keep her alive." she pulls back to look me in the eye. "Just one place Elijah. And it is here." She pokes her index finger on my chest and I know what she is saying.

"I don't know how to do that, Evelyn. You all keep on telling me that I should let her go and on the other hand you tell me to keep her alive in me. I have absolutely no idea how to do that. It is just so confusing. All of this." This forms a little smile on her face.

"Oh My Lil Boy.... Don't worry. You will know, once you stop trying to bind her. Let her go first. She will come back to you in a way you could have never imagined." I take a breath and sigh.

"Okay. Okay. I will try. But I cannot shift from this house." I repeatedly shake my head.

"That's Alright. Just don't stale her memories. She does not deserve that. Bring her memories and this house back to life, will you?" she asks expectantly.

"I will try." with this I pull myself up and extend a hand towards her.

Placing a hand on her shoulder, we walk back towards the living room.

"So, do we know the sex yet?" I ask trying to change the topic.

"Are you insane? It is going to take another month or two before we get to know that. But Neville and I were thinking of keeping it a surprise. It will be more fun that way, don't you think?" I laugh at this.

"And then you call me the insane one. Ofcourse you should know it before hand so you can be prepared. You know, with all the accessories and all." and just like that the conversation continues for the most of the night.

The next morning Neville comes to get Evelyne even before we could say "Good Morning". Well someone is missing his wife. After doing breakfast at my place, they take their leaves, but not before Eve kisses my forehead and tells me to take care. The moment I turn back towards my house, it all comes back rushing to me. I promised to try my best, so I will.

Putting on a mask, around my nose and mouth, and gloves, I get ready to wash that pasta box. 'Damn that does stink like hell'

After 5 hours and 42 mins, the curtains are in the washing machine. The bedsheets are hanging on the stand in the backyard, already washed. So is Scar's nightsuit. Her perfume bottles, creames, her paperwork, journals, almost everything is now secured inside the wardrobe and has been locked. I couldn't seem to take of the large photoframe hanging just above the headboard of our bed. That picture is too beautiful to take down. Some of the Photoframes which were too delicate have been carefully packed in bubblewraps and placed in the small trunk in Scar's wardrobe. The entire floor has been vaccumed and the tables, fans, chairs anything that I could find has been dusted. Now I know why we used to have Sunday dinners out. And why she used to scream at me whenever I stepped inside with my muddy shoes.

Flashback...

"Elijah Ross You better not step into my house, with those shoes or I am having you for dinner tonight or a week of sleep on couch. You pick." placing her hands on the either side of her waist she says.

"Uhnmm.... I think I will take the first option." I say playing with the light stubble under my chin.

"Gladlyyyy" she sings. Staring at each other's eyes for a while we burst out laughing.

Elijah...

I laugh at the memory. "How did we get from that to this Scar?" And with another sigh I close my eyes. I really need some sleep.

Sayonara.

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Hello Everyone!!

So I am back with another chapter. Another two and I have this big surprise for you. Hold you breath because Elijah's life is about to change. If you are liking the book do comment vote and share. It matters a lot.

love and light

Shreya