The first time.

Chapter one: Recalled Memories

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9:53 am

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Good morning.

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Yes I am.

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No, it's really all I can do. This situation is, awkward at best but this is my duty.

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Ok, lead the way.

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Thank you, oh this is quite comfortable!

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Yes, I'm aware this will take quite a while.

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Ah, tea is fine I really don't have a taste for coffee anymore.

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Ah haha no it's ok, I'm doing well, I think I am. As you know my situation was.... is, very unique, I'm honestly just happy that I found a solution.

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Yes, this could be so much worse.

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Ah yes, the rest of my recollection.

Well you're already aware of Vera and how she was treated by the villagers, how she had to survive on her own by selling medicinal herbs which was incredibly difficult given how they forced her to live on the outskirts, which was basically Forrest. They even went to great lengths to avoid her when she did manage to make the very long, trip to the village.

She was... feared.

Irrationally of course, but in a time where proof was nothing and everything, her 'standing' with them could have been remarkably worse so I think that's one of the reasons she was, the way she was.

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Yes, I'm smiling because most of my memories of her are ones I look on fondly as she was a very cheerful person had a strong sense of justice, always smiling and so very rough. I remember she punched me once and its not the type of hit you'd expect to get from a woman in her early twenty's. She had a good reason for punching me mind you but it still hurt.

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ah.. yes I guess speaking about her in the past tense isn't the most accurate, as to me she's still very much alive.

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Describing her; fair skin, long auburn hair, lashes and brow also a very brownish-red like her hair. Dark green eyes, small nose, full lips, light freckles that you wouldn't even notice if you weren't looking closely and-

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My relationship with her? That's, complicated.

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Right.

From the beginning.

Well it all started when I was a child, a wee baby as she'd often call me at the time. I obviously wasn't a wee baby though. However it was clear that she thought of me as such.

At first I'd think she was an aunt that my parents often let me stay with and called her as such. A habit which took years to break, even though she discouraged me from calling her, Auntie Vera and insisted that I just call her Vera. It was strange as I didn't get to see her much while growing up. Maybe seven of eight times before my twelfth birthday? Anyway it was really something as I'd randomly wake up in her house, each time she'd be just as surprised to see me as I was her.

Well...

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"Oh hello there, aren't you a wee baby." she got up from the table where she sat and came over to me before picking me up.

She was smiling and this immediately stopped the urge welling up in me to start crying, not knowing where i was really scared me but she somehow made that better. Even at this point my 6 year old self probably thought that she was really pretty and I distinctly remembering feeling happy again because of her smiling and baby talk.

"How did you get in here little one?" she rocked me gently.

She spoke funny and I don't remember responding, how ever that didn't deter her from asking more questions.

"Are you lost?" she continued to ask in a way almost as if she didn't really want an answer her intent more on pacifying me, her smile and very friendly nature making me feel like she was already someone I could be ok around.

I yawned.

"Oh how cute, are ya sleepy little one?"

I nodded and she became even happier at my reaction. "We're communicating now aren't we? Well off you go~ wee baby." And like that i started to drift off to sleep in her arms. My small arms around her neck.

I didn't even question just how strange it was that I suddenly felt that I could just sleep comfortably in her arms. Almost like she willed me into a comfortable sleep. Her warm embrace filling me with... comfort.

I remember...

The smell of various herbs and plants I don't know, even now but more prominent was the smell of hay so I think at the time she probably owned a horse, though at the time my young mind didn't really place the significance of this.

Her house also seemed old in comparison to my house, no maybe the correct word is 'rustic' maybe? The design was defiantly different but I simply saw it as a strange place.

A strange place filled with warmth, comfort, happiness and my new friend.

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Did I want to stay you ask? I think that at the time I was compelled to think that... maybe. However I think she wanted me to have a normal life. I thought the reason I kept coming back here, was due to her wanting better for me than her situation could afford. It was weird, almost as if she knew me before we even met, knew my life's story before it was even told. However at the end of the day she kept sending me back here and each time it would seem like an eternity before I could see her again.

I would look forward to each new visit to her house. Where she would teach me many things. Herbs that could heal and strengthen for example. But mostly I just looked forward to this time as an escape.

And with each visit she would seem the same, like no time had passed for her at all.

This didn't seem so strange at first. Somewhere in my subconscious I just assumed that she was older than she looked as we never spoke about her age.

We didn't need to. I had so much fun with her during those times. I wish they would never end.

But slowly I started to realize that the 'visits' to her house were getting farther and farther apart and after my 10th birthday I didn't see her again until two whole years after. Before I saw her again on my twelfth birthday though something happened, something so traumatic that i would be changed by it it henceforth. My perception of many things different. This traumatic event I'd refer to as the, 'first time'.