1 Prologue : An offer if you mind

Leon sat on the couch sipping wine. His suit all rumpled, with visible stains of sweat he tried to wipe off with no effect. That little redhead was too horny, or drunk or both to even wait for him to undress.

Most people were already under tables, with only a few still standing including a bunch of girls conquering a giant mountain of coke and two naked guys arguing who has a better ride.

Windows, were sealed shut as the sun slowly rose over the hills his estate was situated on, making it hard to see with their reddened eyes. Only a dim light illuminated the wast room, from a lamp that still worked.

No hard feelings about that. Leon wasn't that kind of guy to be pissed about it, especially that now Leon's all assets now sum up to nine-digit number in dollars.

He will buy a new place anyway. Leon looked around for anything to refill his glass. He has emptied it many times since yesterday... but on the other hand, it was a special occasion. Leon grabbed first bottle only to realize it was empty, and next one and next.. and another ten.

Leon's heart filled to the brim with fear as he stood between a choice of imminent sobriety or mowing his ass. Just, why !? Why didn't he thought about that. His brain desperate for a ethanol started to spin wild fantasies of beverage dripping out of everything, absorbed by his skin, nurturing him and giving warmth, and then eureka!

Images of something greater than him flashed through Leon's mind. But he was ready. He already had a rough idea of the sales pitch!

"Really, bottles are so impractical and obsolete. Once emptied you had to reach or in the worst case get up to grab another one, but with a brand new alco-hole your desired beverage will come straight out of the wall!"

"Shut the fuck up!" One of the girls barked before burying her head in coke mountain again.

Leon stood up ignoring that pathetic lowlife, with passion burning deep in his heart. That's it! A new revolution and evolution in drinking with him spearheading the future! Deep in his soul, he already saw those headlines, rising stonks, and shittons of money.

A part of his brain still wasn't sure why someone would like to risk getting his house flooded with beer when something go south, but that more rational piece knew well all it takes is to make it cool and futuristic or something to get rich idiots to pay, with a flashy app as a cherry on top.

With a loud *thump* someone or something hit the wall. Growling in pain, it tried to back off, only to tripp on some garbage.

Leon looked down at that pathetic being, scrambling down in darkness yet still vicious enough to try to cut him from the light. He knew well that bloodsuckers only came for his cash, not his intellect.

What a sad world it is, that in order to bang a girl he had to invite one first, better a bunch for a reasonable arrange of choice... but why invite guys then?

Suddenly, something in his pocket vibrated, emitting earsplitting noise. Shocked, Leon fell back on the couch. Swearing, he took out his smartphone, to see what moron decided to bug him at 6 am.

Leon froze. Suddenly his mind became earing clear, yet all he could do was an empty stare at the name.

The device trembled in his hand again and fell through his stiff fingers. Now darkroom wasn't that cozy. Shadows danced on the wall, hinting at someone hiding in the corners or behind the windows.

Leon's slowly picked it up, his back cowering in sweat, and forced himself to answer.

"It took you ages." Said voice without a hint of anger.

Leon didn't answer.

"A piece of advice. Next time you bribe someone just make sure no one is around."

"Wait, I have no idea what you're talking about" Leon tried to say, but managed to utter a bunch of incoherent words.

Man on the line ignored him and continued cheerfully.

"You know, for a last few months I thought some people were right that the American dream is long gone , but would you imagine ?!. Janitor! A fucking janitor forgot to take his stuff and went back! And now he's set for the rest of his life! God bless America and its people pulling themselves by their bootstraps! Would you imagine! Would you !"

He didn't want to.

"Anyway, I'm in such a good mood I've decided to give you a little head start. Invest it well !" The call ended, leaving Leon's with thousands of thoughts swirling inside his head.

FBI OPEN UP

A cloud of dust and splinters erupted from hallway as the doors broke, glass exploded everywhere with the Swat team making their way any possible way in, starting pandemonium.

Now people wake up, and upon realizing who is to blame start to panic. One Swat team member didn't notice the guy sleeping next to the door. Tripped, he accidentally fired his rifle fueling chaos.

Leon's survival instinct kicked in. Ignoring orders he rushed throught kitchen and on the hallway. With sounds of heavy boots near he got into the attic, closing the heavy metal door behind him.

Leon always had a thing for those bank vaults although never considered it could be actually useful.

With the voices ordering him, to open or screaming in fear he descended to the bottom full of shelves and cabinets filled with valuables. Leon smacked through anything on his way to the place where the small button was hidden, which opened a secret door, leading to his small office, where he finally began to try formulating a coherent plan.

First, he began to look for any potent drugs that could knock him out.

This way, he could avoid at least the charge of non-compliance and have an alibi for destroying some papers that shall not be revealed.

Fumbling around he finally managed to find everything he needs. Upstairs everything seemed to calm down, as the only thing he could hear, were almost rhythmical blows of a battering ram.

With a strike of a match, he lighted a small pile of papers, making sure everything was eaten by hungry flames. Leon sat on a comfy armchair and put a finger-size box on the desk, wondering how big a dose of LSD should he take, or even should.

Without a team of layers he had no idea how to awoid legal probles, and he already dugged himself quite deep.

"Shit, shit shit" Leon vented out frustration on the wood, punching it until the pain forced him to stop. No matter what he's gonna do, he will soon find himself in the rich guys prison if he;s lucky.

He had a feeling that guy would be satisfied with only that.

Finding ourselves in a small predicament, aren't we?

Leon jumped in place, then spun frantically trying to find a speaker.

"Behind you moron."

A pale blue orb of light hovered over the floor. Although without any facial features Leon could swear it had eyes directly pointed at him.

"The fuck are you?" He said with an afterthought it might not be the best way to talk to space Jesus.

"It depends who asks" orb responded casually "and by the way you don't have to worry I will turn you into dust... probably I am very understanding" Leon could swear it laughed at him.

"You can read my thoughts?!"

"Perhaps, or I simply expected you to be a... certain kind of person" Orb floated up to his face and slowly descended.

"Oh, and to clarify I'm not a product of your mind, and if I was, it would mean you're already high with that little thing you hold so your actions don't hold meaning anyway. So cheer up, you are not crazy, and in the worst case you will only die of overdosing"

"You sure that's the worst-case scenario?" Leon bit his tongue a bit too late.

"Ohhh, Smartie I like that." Orb applauded. Leon did not like that.

" I'm enjoying myself so much being your guest I've almost forgotten to tell why I've visited you in the first place" Orb clapped its hands in spite of having none.

"I have a proposal. Work proposal to be specific. I would like to have you as an envoy of sorts. Interested ?" Orb orbited his body, as he stood still.

"You see I'm "flattered", but unfortunately.." armored door creaked under blows. " I'm kind of wanted right now." Leon scratched his head, letting out a forced laugh.

"Leon, my dear almost underling." Suddenly orb appeared right in front his. Leon instinctively backed off, falling on the chair. "I'm profoundly disappointed you believe some... goons with pif paf toys could be of any problem for me. Your answer."

"In this case, I gratefully accept your offer. NOW DO SOMETHING!!!"

"Wunderbar. Now let's go through the contract." A pile of papers materialized on the desk.

"Sigh here and here with your DNA when you've done" Leon felt something heavy dropping on his lap.

"Now, some unprofessional would accept spit, urine, feces, or breast milk, but since we're adults here and it would look like shit, use this."

It was a giant kitchen knife. A part of Leon wanted to ask orb to explain how should he use it, but a momentary pleasure of awareness he owned that mocking creature wasn't probably worth the risk of it actually explaining it...probably on him.

"Now would you like me to read it?" Orb hovered next to him and ignoring him began to loudly recite

"Terms and condition of eternal servitude of being known as Leonard Voller to the being known as the sovereign venerated great divine god-emperor..."

Leon ignored him, and with closed eyes stit the blade on his finger. Grimacing out of pain, he smeared the document with blood in required spaces and

"Oh, but I see you didn't read terms and conditions. It's not a computer game. Maybe you could spare it few seconds." Last words were smeared with vicious satisfaction.

Doors finally gave in and fell down the stairs. Leon could see the barrel of a rifle.

"JUST DO IT!" He screamed.

"As you wish."

The entire world faded to black.