Chapter 3: Gates apart

I love classes. I really do, except history.

I love pretense play. The teachers pretend to believe that the students are listening with gusto while the students pretend to listen with burning motivation.

'How cute.'

I nod as if understanding why a certain someone decided to (unalive) a certain someone and act like I give a lot of value to the reasoning behind it and all this lasts until 3 in the afternoon.

The bell saves the students and maybe the teachers too.

I pack up slowly, not rushing to leave the class…

Yes, complete lies.

I'm hurrying at a pace even Max Verstappen cannot beat me at to pack up, urge Ceres to pack up so I can glimpse at a certain someone leaving school.

A few months ago we used to walk till the school gate together. Sometimes Ceres, him and I or most of the times, Ceres and I with 'her'.

However, now… we just walk to the gate in separate groups. Ceres and I walk together behind him and his friend. I pay attention to his aura which seems a bit off owing to the scolding for his hair style; a typical everyday issue between the teachers and him.

"Are you two not talking?" Ceres asks, looking concerned. It was just a few days ago that I confessed to having a little crush on him to her on our apartment rooftop.

"No, we are…and that's the sad part." I smile not explaining further. This wasn't the place for this conversation.

"Ok, we'll continue this at the usual place?" She asks as sweetly as always. Have I said how thankful I am for her? Yes? Oh.

As the trail ends, we reach the school gate. He passes through the gate and makes his way to his bike, his sweet heart you could say. I stand still some distance away.

I don't know if it was some centimeters or meters but I am that distance away where it feels like he's a whole world away from me.

Once out of the school, we become strangers. Of course, nowadays it wasn't any better within the school either.

Although we stood on the same path, our feet touching the same rain wet mud; it feels like we're far away. At least further than this so called distance where it seems as if only a gate is separating us.

To exaggerate, if a gate is a world, then we were gates apart.

And that is how you know I dropped mathematics. I sound poetic in a dumb way and I didn't use mathematical terms. Nice.

Ceres nudged me to keep moving. As I cross the gate and look forward, his eyes and mine collide and it gave me an illusion that maybe a few gates opened up to show me a clearer path. I offer my instinctive smile which he returns with some kind of wave and a 'bye'.

I refrain from looking back or I wouldn't be able to hold back from speaking aimlessly again. I don't want to do that. I do not want to be stuck in a situation where I know and am shown that the person I want to talk to doesn't have as much interest in talking to me.

It'll hurt.

Badly.