FreshMelon
Updated! This isn't a review of me praising my work. This is a sort of disclaimer in case readers don't get suddenly disappointed. 1. The MC - Don't try to understand him. Because he has many dynamics to him, it would mislead the readers into thinking that he is 'THAT type of character' when he isn't. His attitude on certain points would also be questioned. Sometimes, he would act out of character. It has been explicitly stated that the story is aware of it. In time, the questions would be answered. 2. Plot too weird and random - As a beginner author, there are scene jumps in the beginning but it would disappear some chapters later. There would be some random events but they aren't closely related to the main plot. 3. Atmosphere - 80% of the second volume is gloomy, not dark. Don't get the wrong impression from the beginning and the synopsis. 4. Pacing - Events happen one after another. But I wouldn't call it fast as if the time is considered, it is slow. The MC doesn't get the time to breathe. This is my response to the well-deserved criticisms. If there are any questions, you can comment. I usually respond to the comments.
Not a shameless author here. It's probably very early for a review but since I have nothing to do, I might as well write this. Also, I want to make things clear. If you go into "see who voted" and see my profile, understand that it's not that I'm shameless. I was scrolling down my novel page in admiration for my work when a guy voted, I got too excited and pressed the "vote". I know it's a minor issue but still. Coming to the novel, I like to think that it's flawless but as an author as well as a reader I know it's not. The writing being one of the biggest flaws (which I'm trying to improve). Regarding the world-building, I believe it's more or less okay. If it appears bad, then it can only be attributed my not-okay writing. Understanding reader's dissatisfaction with main characters, I made the MC. He isn't a Gary Stu but he will get the job done. There are several social norms I would talk about in a sarcastic way. They are not to be taken seriously. Everything else is subjective. You like it? Good. You don't like it? Not good but I understand.
The story is not bad, but it has a ton of sudden jumps with no context. He transmigrates to another world (this is fine so far), he plays a video game once or twice (which I have a hard time finding why he got it in the first place, he may or may not be blacksmithing- I cannot really tell. He meets 15 different people and I still don't know who is who half the time. It does not really clarify what his systems are a whole lot
A very stressful novel... Don't get me wrong, The novel is not bad. It's surprisingly good BUT very had a heavy atmosphere within it ... The MC barely has any rest or relaxing time throughout the first 150-Chapters I read... The Major cause of this is his three identities. The others in the novel can't be measured easily as side characters or supporting characters or even background characters... The roles change so fast and unpredictably... Mr. author is not taking it easy on us whenever we feel that everything is okay and we can predict the next step a completely different scenario play for us and we become more confused... The MC has no real goal or plans just a collection of dangerous events and a war between his brain and his heart ... AGAIN it's very stressful and you absolutely shouldn't read it casually. The world is complicated and vague without any in-depth knowledge about it until it's become relevant to the MC. The only thing I feel for the MC for those +150 chapters is how miserable his life... no matter what fortune he chanced upon it, he always in very depressing situations.
I just read through all of the chapters available for this novel, up to 247, and I must say that I have been thoroughly enjoying this novel. I didn't have a lot of expectations going in but the quality of the work and the depth that each character and situation had to them truly kept me on the edge of my seat the entire time, making me want to keep reading. It is a very complex story with a lot of elements that I know some people might not particularly enjoy or may be off putting to them, but getting past the hiccups in the beginning and understanding a bit more about the situation that isn't very apparent on the surface level has been a truly rewarding experience, and I recommend you if you have just wandered by this to give the novel a chance. Some parts of the story I didn't particularly care for (for example, *perhaps a bit spoiler, just scroll all the way down. I didn't mark the review as spoiler because the larger portion of this review doesn't have any, and this is just for providing some criticism for the Author* . . . . . . . . . . . . The introduction of the third world didn't really hook me in to much, and I ended up skipping to the end of the larger arc that happened because I wasn't as invested into it like I was with his original world and the second world he found himself in. It seemed particularly random at first, and the events didn't seem to have much of an important place in the story [though, I may just be ignorant as I hadn't read through it too much. I will say, I've been able to keep up with the story for the most part without getting any context from this part of the story]. Author, one criticism I'd have when you go about this again is to try and give a more solid connection to the new world and the character and his reasons for going there to create more investment for the reader. It seemed forced and out of place the way that it happened.) . *END of spoilers* . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Truly a hidden gem, it's a shame that it is so underrated as I am writing this review, and I can only offer words of praise to the author for giving so much effort into your novel here. Please keep going, I'm excited to see what happens next with the story.
I like the story but for me it's too busy. It would be fine if the mc chose 1 or 2 missions each time or more if they were simple but it gets to the point where it is too much. Once the mc realizes that he needs to get stronger all of the systems require something. I stopped at chapter 45 because I couldn't keep up with the story or see where it was going.
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