I'll Meet You In Ilsan

This is the moment of my life where everything feels pretty much exciting. I'm 19 years old, young and crazy, and reckless. So what could happen? I'm a kpop fan, a die hard fangirl of a kpop group called BTS. I follow them everywhere in social media-in facebook, twitter, instagram, YouTube. I even write blogs about them on tumblr. I'm a certified ARMY with a heart. My room is full of posters of the boys, albums, army bombs, photographs, cards, magazines, and any other stuffs that are related to the group.

Every day is the same day. I'm lost in the Internet waiting for updates and interesting stuffs about the boys i love. I've been like this for two years now and my life has been one heck of a ride. It's pretty amazing. I have friends who are online, and we're like a family because we love the same group and share the same stories.

But I've pretty much avoided people in real life. I know what they're gonna say about me for being a fangirl, and no matter how hard i try to explain to them, they'll never understand. I'm not sad though. I'm actually happier than anyone thought i would be. I don't need them to tell me what to love and what to do.

I just found comfort being alone, making good vibes with myself, dancing to the beat of the songs I love like Idol, crying from reading the lyrics of The Truth Untold, and dancing again. People think it's crazy to listen to songs you don't even understand. But they're wrong cos they don't know anything. They don't know i understand what those songs meant. But it doesn't matter. I am happy doing these things and stanning BTS is the best thing that ever happens to me. They shouldn't care. I shouldn't care.

Anyway, so in my not-so boring life, i have BTS to cheer me up. I actually live in a country 1,633 miles away from them. Yes, that's quite far for a fan girl to live. But i feel connected to my idols through their songs. Apparently, the songs they released meant the whole world to us as fangirls. It's like the one road that we can always travel to, and no matter where we are in the universe, we can always find our way back to them.

So, being a fangirl means having that ultimate bias of your life, the one idol that always makes your heart flutter by just breathing or existing. Trust me, we fangirls all had those moments where we die a hundred times just because our biases were slaying and killing it. For me, i had been lucky enough to be stanning the ever-famous, most worldwide handsome Kim Seokjin. Most fangirls would go for the hottest guys, but being a Seokjin stan means you've got all the world's happiness put in a massive jar and you don't have to worry for the rest of your life because you're gonna be laughing and laughing till you die. Kim Seokjin is the funniest, craziest, most reckless and amazing guy i ever know. That's why i chose him, among all others. When i saw him for the very first time, I thought "He's the one" and my heart doesn't need any justification about why i decided to spend the rest of my life being in love with this man. For the past two years, I've been falling over and over with this guy and dying a thousand times and getting born again a million times. Okay, that might sound exaggerated. But the truth is, I've been dreaming, as much as every fangirl in the universe does, of meeting the one person i keep feeling in love with over and over again. The one person that took up so much space not only in my phone's gallery but also in my heart. The one person that always and always make me want to imagine my love story with, my fairytale, and my perfectly perfect happy ending. My bias, my idol. And in this case, it's Kim Seokjin. Always have and always will be.

I believe that he's my soulmate. And as crazy as it is, i think i was made for loving him. Or so i thought. So i made a promise to myself. One day, when I'm old enough, i'll go to South Korea and find him.

I'm 19 years old now, Kim Seokjin is 26, and the year was young. When I'll be 25, he'll be 32 years old. Old enough for me but korean men are younger than their age so we'll be suitable for each other for a time. Thinking about that makes me smile.

As i walk out of my house after thinking about Kim Seokjin, i put my headset on, ready to shut the world out and listen to my BTS playlist. I put the song Euphoria by Jeon Jungkook on top of my playlist because it gives me the kind of calm feeling everytime i listen to it. I put on the cover of Autumn Outside the Post Office by Kim Seokjin next since i love his voice in this song. So calm and so full of love. Then I sprint towards my university ready to take my 4:30 class.

Once my class is over, i walk home again. Alone just like the last time but never lonely. I put my headset on again and had a good time listening to my BTS playlist, getting inspired by each song. I passed by the park and when i reach the part where the pond is located, something caught my eye.

A piece of crumpled paper was thrown at my feet. I look around looking for the person behind it but the majority of people are lounging in the park in the distance. I wouldn't have picked it up had it been just a crumpled piece of paper which doesn't mean anything. But i catch a glimpse of writings in it that says "Korea". And beacuse it's that word Korea, and I'm into that word lately, i picked it up, and hold it up for me to see what's written in it. It says" Looking for a trip of a lifetime? Visit Ilsan, South Korea. The city of flowers and wonderment... "

Wonderful, i think. It's a torn piece of paper from a travel brochure dated January 12, 2012. Too long ago. I don't know what it's doing here. Maybe some kid tore it and throw it away. I'm about to hurl it into the pond but for some reason, i just couldn't get rid of it. I study the writings and found some words written on the back. It's written in korean so i don't know what it says. I put it in my pocket, making a mental note to look it up on google once i get home.

Few moments later, I'm at home taking a bath when I remember the paper in my pocket. Before I went to sleep, I take it out and type what's written on it on Google translate. The result goes like this in English "If you read this, meet me In Ilsan, at the entrance of La festa. I'll wait for you. I love you."

Oh it's a love note. But what the heck is it doing in the Philippines? Ilsan is in South Korea. It's 1,633 miles away.

But as I read the words, I can feel the sadness in it. Perhaps, the one who wrote this was heartbroken. Perhaps, he/she was waiting for someone he/she loved. A tragic love story, I guess.

I feel so sad that I don't notice my tears falling. It feels like I'm drawn to that note, like it's me whom this letter was written to. I can't stop my tears from falling and I don't know why. Something about this letter is overwhelming. It forces me to feel some feelings I don't know I have. I know I shouldn't feel this way but I do.

I've been crying for hours for reasons unknown when my eyes suddenly feel heavy. I didn't realized I'm closing my eyes and drifting to sleep with the note still in my hand. And everything goes dark after that.

In my dreams, I saw a man writing a note to his lover who broke his heart and left him. Then I look at his face and recognize him immediately.

I know those features. Those lips, eyes, and shoulders. It's him.

Kim Seokjin.

But how could that be?