Chapter 3: Meeting in the Eye of The Skeleton Head That Was on Top of the Mountain That Was on Top of the City That was.....

"Excellent!" Sirius said in a very evil tone. "We have very serious matters to attend to. Let us gather in the eye of the skeleton!"

"Very good Narrator! Thank you for correcting your previous buffoonery!" Lord Sirius chimed.

Gathered in a deep, dark cave, lit by candles in the eyes of a giant corpse skeleton, Sirius and his league of seven followers gathered in the shadows to discuss their evil plan.

"Now, my minions," Lord Sirius said. "Now that we've gathered here in this darkness, I would like to show you something most evil."

With his hands behind the fire, he took two index fingers and moved them behind the other palm of his hand, moving his fingers around in a circle. The image of a giant spider appeared in the shadows on the wall.

"Oh no, a spider!" a female voice cried in panick.

Picking up a giant hammer, the woman jumped at the shadow on the wall and smashed it as hard as she could, sending rocks and shrapnel all over the room. When she had finished, there was a giant hole in the cave, now filling the entire room with light.

"It wasn't real," Sirius said, with his eyes rolling around from the shock. "Why is it that every time you're in a meeting, something gets destroyed, Mira?"

"Haha, sorry, got carried away again," Mira said, smiling, her long pink pigtails dangling out of the side of her black hoodie.

"Don't worry, Lord Sirius," a young man with gray hair said as he walked up to the wall, placing his hand in front of the area that had been destroyed. "Time heals all"

"Repair," he chanted slowly. One by one, small patches of dirt and dust began to combine again, forming into a rock formation. The rock formation slowly gathered piece by piece until it had completely replaced the wall.

"Thank you, Crucis," Sirius said, patting him on the shoulder.

"There's nothing that time can't heal," Crucis said, returning to his seat.

"Oh wait! You missed a spot!" Sirius said pointing to an open area that wasn't repaired.

"Ehhh that part would take too much time" Crucis said.

"WHAT!!!" Sirius boomed. "How can you be so lazy! You have plenty of time! You literally can control time!"

"Yeh but Some Time but not all the Time...Time controls me as well, and I think its Time for a nap"

"Are you really going to pick now to" Sirius began.

By the time he had raised his hand in angst Crucis was fast asleep filling the halls with his snore.

"Whatever talking to you is a Waste of Time! Enough playing around," Sirius said, getting serious. "I wanted to ask about the status of..."

"Bzzzzzzzzzz."

A fly flew by Lord Sirius, irritating him and throwing him off balance.

"Stupid insect," he muttered. "As I was saying, I wanted to inquire about..."

"Bzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzr!" The fly flew in his face once again, interrupting his speech and irritating him. Sirius swatted at the fly, but wasn't able to grab it.

"I was just saying that..."

"Bzzzzzzzzzzzzzzt."

Slice!

A sword the length of the entire room zoomed past Lord Sirius' head, and with the edge of its razor-tipped blade, it sliced the fly in half effortlessly.

"My apologies, Lord Sirius," a man with long purple hair said. "But I could not stand to see that insect bother you any longer."

"Thank you, Epsilon," Sirius said, nodding his head.

"Now, as I was saying!" Lord Sirius began.

"AAACHHOOOOOOOOO!"

An enormous man in a dark robe let out a tremendously loud sneeze that tore the cave to shreds. A shockwave erupted from his mouth, traveling through the air like a cannon, blowing apart the cave walls once again. Sirius was knocked to the ground covered in green boogers. He scowled and writhed as the green abnormality stuck to his clothes and skin.

"Sorry, boss," the giant red-skinned man said, scratching his head.

"Gamma, you big oaf!" Mira said, smacking him on the head with her giant hammer.

"Aww, c'mon!" Gamma scowled. "You know I have a dust allergy!"

"No matter," Lord Sirius said. With a snap of his fingers, a dark energy enveloped him, removing all of the slime from his clothes and leaving him sparkling clean. Crucis, woken up by the giant sneeze, repaired the wall again with his time-altering abilities.

"As I was saying..." Sirius said, stopping mid-sentence as the shadow of a giant monster appeared on the wall just behind him.

"Sirius! There's a monster behind you!" Gamma cried.

"It's just a shadow puppet," Sirius said, placing his hand on the wall. "See?"

Jumping through the wall, a giant panther with black armor burst into the cave, toppling Sirius over. On its back, a black-haired woman with a neck tattoo pounced from the wall.

"Sorry I'm late!" she said, barging into the cave. "Where's Master Sirius?"

All six of the fellow comrades pointed to the ceiling, where Sirius was engraved into the top.

"My LORD!" she exclaimed, falling to her knees. "I am so sorry!"

"For your cuteness, Celphi…" Sirius said, looking into her tiny shiny hazel eyes. "You are... forgiven," Sirius said.

Celphi nodded her head and cutely walked over to the other side of the room.

"Now... before I-"

Sirius paused, looking around the room for trouble but found nothing that could interrupt him this time. Paranoid that something would occur, he wearily cleared his throat and began once again.

"I just wanted to-"

He once again cut off his sentence, searching for the next catastrophe.

"Okay," he said, dabbing his head. "Now, as I was saying."

"HOUSTON WE ARE PREPARING FOR LIFTOFF!" A voice boomed in the distance.

"What's Houston?" Gamma said, scratching his head.

"Ready to lift off in 3..."

"WHAT!"

"2"

"What the hell!"

"1"

"YOU IDIOTS!!!!!"

BOOOM!!

The room shook and swiveled as a giant rocket shot out from the bottom of the skeleton head. The seven members of the evil Council were pressed against the floor from the force of the propulsion, and within minutes, the giant skeleton head had blasted into outer space.

"This could only be the work of one mad scientist!!! " Sirius cried as his head spun towards the back of the room. "Cygnus!!!" He screamed at cloak in the distance

"Hehehhe, hello master," a short, sniveling man said turning around.

"Why are we blasting into outer space?" Sirius boomed.

"Well, you are always telling me to give you your space, sir... So... here it is! Outer space! You literally have all the space in the universe now!"

"YOU BAFOON!" Sirius screamed at Cygnus. "Next time put space between you and me! you go it!"

"Aye sir!" Cygnus said laughing

Sirius turned around searching for help from on of his bishops.

"Crucis, do something!" Sirius cried.

"Sorry, my Lord, I can only undo things that affect matter, not people."

"Why am I not surprised?" Sirius said tearing his hear out of his head. "Is there no one who is not a buffoon in my ranks!"

"Don't worry, my lord. I will take care of this," A man with red hair said. He was the tallest of the group and had a giant red hand that stuck out from his cloak.

"Ah, Antares, you never fail me, my second in command." Sirius said getting teary eyed.

"Prepare yourselves," Antares said, placing his giant red hand on the other side of the skeleton head.

BOOM!

Antares's giant red firework exploded, catapulting the base back to the evil mountain of Mt. Dickidous and perched back where it had been originally.

"WOOHHHOOO!!!"

"That was fun!"

"Let's do that again!"

"Should I rewind time? We can do it again if you'd like!"

"Wait! No one told me what Houston is!"

"Blasted! I almost got us to orbit the sun! And I would have gotten away with it too! If it wasn't for you meddling kids and that!"

"ENOUGH!!" Lord Sirius screamed.

He rose from the ground with a dark veil of darkness covering his body. "All of you, simmer down!"

With a snap of his fingers, he enveloped the seven in shadows and slammed them into their chairs.

"We don't have time to be joking around! I have a most important question for all of you that demands your immediate attention!" Sirius commanded

"Yes, sir!" The seven said, standing at attention.

"The question is…" Sirius said, sinisterly shrouding the room with darkness.

"MCDiggins or Wendol's?" He said, drawing out two ice cream cones. "MCdiggins' ice cream machine is back up! But someone has to pay for this treachery! I was denied ice cream for 24 hours!"

"Wendol's!" The group answered unanimously.

"Really? That simple?" Sirius shrugged.

"Of course! Wendol's machine never goes down and the frosties are so much better! Here, you have one try sticking a fry into your frosty!"

Celphi got on her panther and rode up to Lord Sirius. Drawing a fry from her combo meal, she placed it into his frosty.

"What is this madness!" Sirius screamed, appalled by what Celphi was doing.

"Open up!" She said cutely, dangling the fry over Lord Sirius's mouth.

Intimidated, and yet intrigued by the cuteness of her efforts and the astounding resilience of his supporting seven, Lord Sirius opened his mouth and ate the fry.

"HOW DARE YOU!" Lord Sirius screamed. Once again rising from the shadows.

"I'm sorry… I thought you would like it…" Celphi cried.

"I didn't like it… I loved it! How dare you just bring this to me now! How could you deprive me of such a succulent snack!"

The ministers rejoiced, filling the halls of the Skeleton Eye with mirth and joy.

"Yes!!! Now let's all go out for Wendol's!" Antares cheered.

"Wait! Before that, there is one last thing we must do." Sirius chimed.

"What is it, my lord?" Antares said, falling to his knee.

"Tonight," Sirius said, raising both of his hands proudly. "WE MUST REMOVE MCDIGGINS FAST FOOD COMPANY FROM EXISTENCE! Muhahaha!"

"Muhahaha!"

"And just like that, the group all maniacally laughed in unison as they set out to destroy the McDiggins empire, briefly stopping to assist Lord Sirius who had choked on a fry, and then again when his lactose intolerance kicked in. Nonetheless, they valiantly—"

"HHAHAHAHA!" His henchmen laughed.

"NARRATOR! STOP NARRATING OUT LOUD, YOU BUFFOON! EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU!"