Chapter 1 - Klaus Eichel

My life continued in a daze for a while until the second tragedy hit, a tragedy by the name of Klaus Eichel. Even in my disregard for what was going on around me, hearing his name stopped me in my tracks. There was something akin to fear growing within me but I couldn't place exactly why this was happening. His name felt familiar yet distant, like a dream long forgotten. How could his name evoke such a feeling when he was a new student, one that did not even step foot in our kingdom until earlier this week?

Soon enough, my days of wandering came to an end. I became fixated on Klaus in a way that did not make sense to others. I did not care about who he was or what he was doing. The present was of no concern to me. What I wanted to know was why he was so familiar. Perhaps I was chasing his past, or my own through him, but I had a gut feeling that when I made sense of his familiarity, I would make sense of the world. As nonsensical and grandiose as that sounds, I felt it stronger than any grief or sadness that plagued me thus far.

Driven by my curiosity I found my eyes following him constantly, hoping for anything to resurface the forgotten memories. It may have been my own complacency in knowing that this world has a tendency to look over my actions, but I expected him to behave as everyone else. When everyone remained oblivious to any strange behaviours I exhibited, I unwittingly became dependent on their ignorance.

"Do you need something from me?" Asked a voice standing in front of me as I sat in my desk, packing up my belongings to head to lunch.

The voice was unfamiliar so I hesitatingly looked up to find the source. It was Klaus. Confused by the sudden approach, no words came to mind as I stared at him quizzically.

"Are you not going to respond? Despite constantly staring at me?"

"Sorry?" I didn't understand. I couldn't. Why was he approaching me and why did he do so in a manner unlike all the others?

He sighed and rubbed his forehead with his fingers, which only confused me further. He appeared frustrated or in pain, I'm not sure which. I had lost connection with such feelings for some time now.

"Listen. I have seen you staring at me for quite some time now. Is there something you wish to tell me? Or perhaps, do you need something from me?"

"No? My apologies, I umm... Hadn't realised I had been staring." I tried to respond calmly but it came out more as a question.

"Is that so?" I knew he didn't believe me. My mind was running with how best to escape this situation, but I came back with nothing.

Realising I had no intentions to carry on the conversation, Klaus continued. "Do I know you?"

"No." My response was quick, and some might argue discourteous. Even I questioned whether that was the truth, but the truth could wait. It mattered less than being away from this man that was causing the acid in stomach to rise at an unreasonably fast rate.

For a moment we stared at each other in silence before he turned away and left. Strange, I thought. That was the best word to explain his entire existence in my life. The rest of the day I felt antsy, fidgeting and waiting for classes to be over. Every part of me wanted to run and never turn back. There was a feeling of impending doom, that from here on out things would only get worse. But where would I go? That was the issue. I knew near enough nothing and no one. Outside of existing, what could I do in this world? How would I survive, and most of all, did I even want to?

As soon as classes were over, I had my bag ready to sprint out of the building but who would be the one to stop me? Klaus. In a way, I felt like only he and I existed at this point. Or maybe it was just him. Everyone else, myself included, moved as puppet. Only Klaus appeared different. Only he had this trait that I suppose we could attribute to free will.

"Max!" He called out, successfully gaining my attention. I momentarily questioned why my name rolled off his tongue so smoothly.

His voice was still unfamiliar to me but when he said my name I turned around out of habit. The name was still not one I was accustomed to but when he called out to me, it felt like my very own. I was afraid that being around him meant I would accept this new identity, and memories of my own identity would disappear. No matter how much I wanted to avoid him, I knew I would listen to him out of curiosity, if not obsession.

"Yes?" I spoke to the ground rather than Klaus.

"Could we speak for a moment?"

"What for?"

I looked at him after I received no response and saw confusion staring back. With an eyebrow raised it felt like he was asking me why I was behaving like this only towards him, and how I had survived in the social world with my attitude.

Slowly he answered "I figured it would benefit both of us to get to know each other a little."

I despised myself at this moment for even temporarily piquing his interest.

"Thank you for the offer but there's no need for that."

"Do you always speak like that?"

"... Like what?" I could feel my heart pounding in my chest. Unsure of what to make of his question, I felt like I had been caught out in a lie I hadn't told.

"Do you really not know? The way you speak hardly seems natural. The way you use words seems to me that you are trying to sound a certain way, like you are pretending to be someone you are not."

Before he could continue, which I knew he would, I ran as fast as my shaky legs would take me. I didn't know what he was talking about but I had no intention of finding out. I couldn't shake the feeling of being caught despite feeling certain I had never lied, at least not to him.