2 Meeting a Deity

I open my eyes and behold a being far larger than myself. They stand easily ten feet, tall, with waist length blue hair and purple eyes. They exude a sense of pressure, a sense of power. So I respond in the only reasonable way I can.

"... Da f*ck?" I mean, what would YOUR reaction be if a truck literally fell out of the sky on you, and you end up in front of some androgynous looking quasi-giant? Honestly, I'm kind of proud that I didn't start screaming.

The quasi-giant chuckles. "This is why I chose you, such an unusual reaction. The person I summoned just ten minutes ago, Terra time, started screaming about how they couldn't be dead, and that they had so much to do." They snort. "I got so irritated that I sent them to the world of Goblin Slayer as a woman with a cocky attitude."

I wince in sympathy. 'May you be granted a quick death my predecessor.'

The being continues. "You though, compared to everyone I usually get, are completely calm. And I could tell by your expression just now that you understand what I intended with the last guy. The people I get with that kind of knowledge are usually trouble in a different way."

They sigh again. "They'll either get super excited and think everything will go their way, or immediately try to make demands or try and trick me into giving them OP benefits." They shake their head. "I usually give them bad luck commiserate with how much they got on my nerves."

Another chuckle. "I remember one person who's luck was so bad, they were reborn as a succubus. Then they got eaten alive by a box a few hundred times to the point where it affected their soul. Anyways," they wave their monologue away, "given how calm you are, we can expedite the process."

I nod my head and try to keep a respectful tone. "Thank you for your consideration. May I ask why you've summoned me? And where the truck that killed me came from?"

They blink before frowning and pulling a folder out of their robe. "A truck," they mutter, "that's not right, it should have been a frozen turkey..." They flip through the folder while my mouth drops open at what I just heard. Who gets killed by a frozen turkey? Was I actually a side character in someone else's comedy based story?

"Ah, here it is!" My contemplations are interrupted by the being's exclamation. Apparently I got my timing wrong. Instead of a plane carrying frozen food, a plane carrying various vehicles was flying overhead." They shrug before tossing the folder over their shoulder. "Oh well, not like it really matters at this point."

They clap their hands. "So, the reason I've summoned you." They give me a big grin. "I'm bored."

They continue on before I can say anything. "I'm constantly needing to summon people from a limited pool of candidates for the same old tasks. 'Oh no, the world is in danger, gotta summon a hero to save it!' 'The Demon Lord's resurrection is due in a year, better summon a hero!' 'Ah, my magic is going out of control and it opened a portal to who knows where? Guess it'll suck up some random people in another world to bring over!'"

They snort. "I'm sick of being the chauffeur for everyone else's summonings, it's unfair I tell you! Not to mention that nearly everyone has the same goal of somehow going back to Terra." They look at me, waiting for a response.

I can feel my lips curling into a sneer. "Yeah, I never understood why that was in books. Like, sure if they left behind family or people they care for, I could kind of understand. But even then, it's like they're saying that the family and friends they make in their new world matter less than those on Ear- eh, Terra. And for those that don't have anybody, it make even less sense!" I throw my hands up into the air in frustration.

"I mean, look at me. No friends, I'm not close with my family. Heck, if I didn't go to work I could be considered a shut-in! You've basically said that I'm getting reincarnated. Am I going to try and go back to the dull and dreary lifestyle I had on Terra? Hell no!"

They give me an amused grin as I take deep breaths after my rant. "Oh, and what about modern amenities, like indoor plumbing? There's no guarantee that the world I plan to send you too will have magic either. Would you still take that chance?"

I stare at them with determination filled eyes. "For a life of adventure, even one without magic, sacrifices must be made."

They blink. Then they throw their head back as they give out full belly laughs. This goes on for a good fives minutes before they begin to calm down. They're still laughing as they speak. "Heh, I like you, you have just enough madness in you that you'll provide quality entertainment in the place I'm sending you. Don't worry, there will be magic. Oh, and there will be a system in place for that reality."

They give me a curious look. "By the way, how does it feel knowing I killed you simply for my entertainment? Do you want revenge? I won't get mad even if you do you know, it just means I have something else to look forward to."

I shrug my shoulders. "Nope. We both get what we want. You get entertained, I get isekaied. I see this as an absolute win."

They smile before shrinking down to my level. "So interesting. Oh yes, I never introduced myself did I? You may call me Soahc. Tell me, what is your wish for this new world?"

I look the now introduced deity in the eye and reply, excitement and determination filling my voice. "I want to be an adorable cat girl."

"... Wot?"