36 Treat me like a fucking Luna!

"Babe" I heard Damien say as he opened the door slightly and peeped inside

I guess Claire must have told him about my state of mind.

I am angry, no angry doesn't quantify it, I am livid.

Firstly, I never thought he'd leave me as quickly as he did today. After such huge emotional stress I went through today, I'd thought he'll stay by my side and be the source of my happiness all through but then he became the exact opposite, he became the source of my sadness.

At first, I was worried. Him rushing out of the room with something related to fear on his face, Claire's panicked expression and shaky body dragging me almost roughly and putting me in what she called a safe room did nothing to calm my skyrocketing nerves.

I thought about the possible things that could be happening but couldn't place my fingers on the right one. At first, I thought it was the Elders but then, with their joyful reaction when we were leaving, I could tell it wasn't them.

'What then could be their source of panic and anxiety?' I thought as I paced around the dimly light room while praying nothing bad happens.

Something approximated to 30 minutes later, Claire opened the door calmly and with a smile and relieved expression, she hugged me and told me everything is fine and that it was a false alarm.

Still, she didn't tell me the details of the so-called false alarm, she told me not to worry and that Damien would soon be home.

She then invited her friends and some other new faces home and they joked, gisted, and had a mini party in the living room. I couldn't join though, I don't know why but I felt greatly left out. Mostly like I didn't belong with them or anywhere here to be precise.

Never have I ever wished to be hugged by my dad but at that moment when they were all laughing heartily and being generally happy, I couldn't deny the great sadness I felt in myself.

I almost cried, okay no lies, I cried. I rushed into the room, inhaled Damien's scent on the bed, and cried so hard.

It was very tempting to just pick up my goddamned phone and call my dad, aunt, and my friends then tell them what's happening and that I miss them and that I'm sorry and that I hate them and so on but I didn't, I couldn't. If I call my dad while crying, his overprotective ass would demand I come home immediately, if I call my aunt, she'll tell my dad and then he would demand I come home and if I call my friends, the same train would happen and the last thing on my mind now is going home.

I can't go home. Not after I had bluffed about how impossible it is for me to run home crying to my dad, it'll be such a great scar to my ego. And also whenever I think of going home, my heart aches badly because I know that means leaving Damien and that I can't do.

All trains of thought ran through my head until one stayed.

Why the fuck does he have to take care of things himself all the fucking time? I am his Luna right, his Queen, a supposed second in command, then why the hell does he have to make me beg him before he tells me most things that goes on in his pack? Why must I always be in the darkness and why doesn't he dim it fit to pull me out of it?

Why does it feel like he takes me for granted and he doesn't think I can handle even harsh situations?

Did my action today even convince him that I can handle things greatly? Of course, it did, his face and smile said more than words and I'm sure of it, I'm sure of what I felt from him. Then why the heck can't he trust me with vital information? Why does he have to treat me like a fucking glass all the fucking time!?

I couldn't eat anything with the way I was feeling. Claire and Prisca came to me at a point and I couldn't hold back my tongue at them as I screamed and demanded them out of my room

Scarlett also came once with food and I did the same but being the hard-headed bitch she is, she placed the food tray on the table and told me to eat it before it goes cold.

The aroma was nice I wouldn't deny that but then I had no appetite, I didn't feel like eating and that only made me sadder.

I think this is the first time I would be looking at food and wouldn't be able to eat it. It felt weird but still, I didn't even try to take anything

After what felt like an eternity, the so-called mate of mine is not entering the room and calling me babe, to what do I owe this honor, please?

"Layla" he called again as he entered the very dark room and stared at me

My eyes which had been adjusted to the darkness burned painfully as the bright light shined into it.

"What the fuck!" I screamed as I sat up in bed and covered my eyes which felt blind as it was seeing many colors

"I'm so sorry, I thought you were asleep already!" he said as he rushed towards me using his goddamned intimidating super speed which only did justice to my bad feeling, reminding me of why he treats me like he does.

"Whatever" I replied before lying back on the bed and shutting my eyes tightly while praying for sleep to engulf me quickly before his cologne does.

"Babe," he said again as he touched me slightly, awakening my insides as small but many sparks rushed throughout the point of contact.

I felt love and hate at the same time because of this. I love the feeling I wouldn't lie but then what right does he have to soften my resolve so quick and just by touching me slightly?

"Don't touch me!" I stated before putting distance between us. Even if it hurts and makes me feel empty once again, I'm not going to crave his touch. I'm not even going to let him near me, not at all.

"I'm sorry," he said after what felt like hours of silence, and with a word so small, I lost the grip I had on my mouth.

"Don't you tell me sorry you bitch! You kidding me, like seriously! How can you just come all of a sudden after promising me you'll be back soon and then say sorry? Just like that!? You think this is easy right? This is funny? Not it must be fun. Of course, it is fun, I mean common, having a small and weak human around, who would feel nothing, or even want to feel anything apart from wanting your touch, attention, love, kisses? It's fun!"

"Ba..." he started but I didn't even allow him to finish

"And don't you dare babe me, you bastard!" I screamed as I stood up from the bed, anger surging through every inch of me "Why call me babe when you don't dim it fit to treat me like you care about my feelings? You call me Luna but you don't treat me like a fucking Luna! After everything I've done to show you how capable I am! And then you call me babe?! You make me worried, cry, fear and messy, and then you call me a fucking babe!?"

"Layla"

"Don't call my name!"

"Then what the fuck do you expect me to do then!?"

"I don't know but then don't fucking yell at me!"

"I'm sorry, honestly I am, just let me explain myself okay?" he said in a small voice that I'm sure I would have pitied if I were in my right senses but then the only thing I could think of right now is how easy it is for him to neglect what I feel and say

To be very honest, I feel like breaking something, anything, and mostly the first thing I set my eyes on, the food on the table, and without wasting time I moved towards it with purpose.

"I said don't tell me sorry!" I screamed as I flung the food tray off the table with full force and clouded mind. The glassware with no halt or delay shattered with a huge noise and scattered around the room but mostly on the floor right beside where Damien was standing.

Looking into his eyes with fury, I saw the pain that was edge on it, and immediately I knew the pain wasn't emotionally inflicted but physical and to confirm my speculation, I looked down to see the large glass in his foot and the blood that was rushing down from the wound.

I calmed immediately and with the way my anger flew off, it was like it was never there.

Rubbing my hands together in despair, I looked at the now bright red eyes of my mate and I knew I just made the greatest mistake of my life, inflicting pain on an Alpha wolf.