the start of the journey

What. The. Fuck.

[Congratulations! You have been chosen by the God system! Choose your divinity and start a journey to Godhood! Note: once one Divinity is maxed out, a new one can be chosen.]

A loud THUD sounded in my cell. Looking up, I saw Oscar of Astora that just dropped The Hollow containing the key needed to escape this hellhole.

Have I mentioned that im in Dark souls?

Because I am.

One moment im choking on a hot-dog and the next im in the cell where the game starts. It was the first thing I realized when I woke up here. 

Whoever isekai'd me clearly ignored all my birthday wishes, the fantasy world I always asked to be transmigrated to before blowing out the candles was Dragon Dogma.

"Man this is bullshit." I complained and started searching the corpse for the keys to open my cell. "I hope im undead or im not sure if I can make it even to the gargoyles." Once I found them I exited my prison and started to move forward.

I quietly marched through the corridor while trying to ignore the big bro of the asylum demon that could be visible through the damaged wall on my right. I didn't bother with killing the passive hollows minding their own business, I just quietly walked past them and made my way forward.

It didn't take long for me to stand in front of the giant door that will lead to the boss area where the Asylum demon will be.

"I just need to sprint toward the open gate at the end of the left corner…easy enough…" 

…

…

…

What if the asylum demon blocks my escape route? 

"FUCK!" I turned my back toward the door and leaned on it.

How am I supposed to do this?? Dark souls developers you fucking twats, did you really had to Boss at the START of the game!?!

I don't even have any armor or weapon! I'm literally in my Nike's, jeans, and hoodie! 

I also have fingerless gloves because I like the cringe-edgy look they give off, but that's also not helping!

In my current position, I wouldn't mind having the broken sword hilt even though it's fucking useless! How am I meant to defend myself??

The light of a pop-up gold-colored screen to my left caught my attention.

[Congratulations! You have been chosen by the God system! Choose your divinity and start a journey to Godhood! Note: once one Divinity is maxed out, a new one can be chosen.]

Oh, right. I forgot about that.

Right… right! I can become a God! This will surely help me!

"I want to be the God of…of…" of what?  What can help me here? "Of everything?"

[Request denied, you can have the divinity of only one concept, and collect more throughout your journey.] 

Fuck, fucking fuck fuck fuck!

"Alright…I want to be the God of…" something versatile, something that will provide multiple options, something flexible! think, think! 

"...energy?"

[Divinity spark has been granted.]

[Divinity spark has been granted with the concept of energy.]

[Gods cast Divine magic through their wants and needs, limited only by the size of their Divinity.]

[Small Divine spells: ∞]

[Medium Divine spells: 1 every 24 hours.]

[To increase the amount and gain a better quality of Divinity spells you will need to gain the worship of people]

First. Divine magic is incredibly OP. Casting magic through wants and needs? Holy shit.

Second. How the fuck do I make people worship me? I can't just tell them that im God, they would think im a Looney! Make a cult? A good plan but I have no idea how to even begin making one!

Screw it, im gonna think about how to do this later. For now. Let's figure out how my Divinity works.

Alright, energy…what kind? Does it matter? …plasma? Plasma is the result of high, unstable energy levels. Lightning is made out of plasma, so can I make lightning? Fire is also energy, it just needs a lot less of it than lightning, so technically, I can use that too.

I brought my left hand in front of me and tried to summon lightning. Before my mind properly visualized what I wanted, my hand already had arcs of electricity dancing between my fingers. 

I stared in wonder at the sight before I frowned. How much more energy can I put in this shapeless lightning before it would be considered a medium divine spell?

More.

The lightning thickened. Some of its arcs started to spread out outside of my hand.

I kept pushing and pushing more energy into it until it looked like a Chidori from Naruto, a couple of two-finger thick lightning arcs escaping it from time to time to hit the ground around me.

Fucking cool AF. 

I'm not ashamed to admit that I made one of those high-pitched noises of excitement that those girls in "movies for teens" do when their crush asks them out.

Alright, as cool as this is, I need to focus and check out my other abilities.

I dispelled the lightning on my hand, making it disappear suddenly as if it was abruptly erased from existence.

What else was there? Ah, right! Fire.

Just like with lightning, my hand soon had orange licks of flame around it. I thought of a fireball and got a fireball. Flying fire snake? A long wrist-thick danger noodle of flames wriggling through the air around was the result.

I willed the flames to disappear and they did.

What about ice? can I take away the energy around me to create cold temperatures? Despite what it may seem, absorbing energy from the environment is the mutant ability of ice-man from the X-man, and that guy once literally froze hell! It may use Comics science logic, but it holds some truth.

 Could I do the same?

As I thought about it, the air around me got cold, the floor and the door I was leaning on now had a thin layer of ice on them.

Cool, ice magic unlocked.

The last thing that comes to mind is just energy. No lightning, No fire, No ice. Just…energy?

A blue sphere formed above my palm. I could change its color, I could even change its shape. I made it into a stick, a sword, even into a chair. It was literally a lump of energy that existed in a solid-state of matter. I had no idea how this worked scientifically, but I didn't need to, I was just happy to have it.

Alright, so let's go over my superpowers again.

Pyrokinesis

Cryokinesis

Electrokinesis

Weird-lumb's-of-energy-kinesis

Alright, im a little more confident with my chances now…still terrified at the fact that I'm gonna face a demon, but way more positive than before.

"Alright…You live only once…" I said and pushed the enormous door open just enough for me to pass through. "Wait, this is Dark souls, YOLO doesn't apply here-!"

The absolutely enormous Asylum Demon dropped to the ground making it shake violently. I'm surprised that the ground didn't collapse since there is a room underneath the arena, but knowing that inside that room was the big brother of the demon im currently facing, I also thanked the heavens that it didn't.

The demon roared. It was such a loud noise that it hurt my ears a little.

I gathered as much lightning as I could and made it into a spear. Just like the miracles you gain by joining the warriors of sunlight, with the only difference being the color of the attack. Mine was natural bluish lightning you see during a storm, not the yellow one that you see created through the miracles in-game.

I have no idea if this is a strategically good thing to do, im no warrior, im a teen who masturbates to animated girls in his room, for fucks sake!

Sona Sitri is best Waifu btw.

As soon as I felt that my lightning spear hit its maximum capacity, and I knew it did because it refused to take in more energy, I lunged it toward the monster who was in the middle of taking its second step toward me.

I blinked and the large big scary demon was now missing the entire upper half of its body, while everything around him was painted red with its blood.

…Holy shit.

[Medium Divine spell used. You will be able to use it again in 24 hours.]

...

Okay?

"I kinda feel badass." I said to myself. "But that kinda felt anticlimactic, didn't it?" After standing there awkwardly for a couple of seconds I went toward the small gate at the left end of the arena.

Time to recruit Oscar.

If dark souls fanfics taught me anything, it's that you always need to slap Oscar for being a fucking idiot who doesn't use his Estus Flask even tho he is a wounded undead on the verge of "dying".

As I make my way toward where he should be, I ignore the bonfire, zap the hollow archer with a small divine spell which makes it spasm on the floor before it stops moving, and go past the corpses that you loot for a shield and weapon in the game. 

I pass through the fog wall and turn to my right. The sound of something heavy making its way toward me makes me realize that the hollow that rolls down the iron ball from upstairs won't wait for me to try climbing those stairs before doing it. 

Right, this is no longer a game. Game mechanics and the Game script no longer apply here… Anyway! I jumped out of the way and immediately zap the hollow undead upstairs in retribution.

At least the iron ball that it rolled down broke the wall that allowed me to access the room where Oscar is.

So I entered.

…slowly.

And as majestically as I could.

Because if I'm a God, I might as well put on a show and act like one. Roleplaying is fun, after all.

The knight of Astora did not move. He was laying down on the rubble limp and in an awkward position.

Are you kidding me? 

He is dead! 

What am I supposed to do now!? He was supposed to be my companion! God damn it, I took too long, and now im gonna need to make someone else carry me!

Man, this is bullshit…

[Do you wish to offer Oscar of Astora to become your Paladin?]

"My what?" I asked confused

[A Paladin of a God is bound by an oath to protect the Deity he serves and everything else that his God stands for.]

"Now that sounds neat and all." I began "but he is dead." I stated the obvious. "How am I supposed to give him this Job invitation?" 

[Your voice will reach beyond the veil of death to contact him. If he chooses to serve you, he will be brought back to life without becoming hollow.]

Wow. Gods have BS abilities, don't they?

"Sure, let's do it."

_-_-_-_-_

It was dark…but I wasn't aware of this darkness until a distant light lit up in the distance. It felt as if my mind suddenly became clear, with me not knowing how foggy it was before it happened.

Am I…dead? Of course, I am, I'm an undead. 

Is this how it feels to become hollow? Being denied the privilege of experiencing the world? Trapped in a dark abyss with only a flicker of light as company for the rest of eternity, while my hollow body attacks everything that contains life? 

How cruel…

"You are not hollow, noble night" a voice…a young voice said…spoke to me.

Who is it? What is it?

"I'm but a humble God who wants to fix this broken world." 

A God? What nonsense is this?? If thou are a God why do you appear before me now, and not before I draw my last breath!

"I assure you that I'm speaking the truth. I'm a God of faraway lands. Lands that even the Gods of these parts of the world would not be able to reach."

…

"I came here as I was tired of their foolish quest to preserve their age. In their arrogance and desperate attempt to cement their rule over this world they wounded it. Even time is slowly starting to break, countless timelines overlapping with each other, temporarily merging into one before separating."

What are you speaking about?

"The Age of fire was supposed to end a long time ago, but Gwyn foolishly set himself ablaze in the first flame to fuel it. An act that started the undead curse."

What Heresy is this!? Thy want me to believe that this Curse was caused by the Gods themselves!

"That is indeed what I'm saying. Gwyn feared the age that was meant to come after his own, the age of darkness. So he tried to stop it."

Surely he must have done it for a reason! The age of dark must have carried consequences with it if it would be allowed to come!

"Of course, it would bring consequences. The age of dark has its cons, but there are also pros to it. It's simply a new way of existence caused by the natural flow of the world. Who are we to deny the flow of nature?"

What of the prophecy? Doesn't it state that the chosen undead will break this curse?

"The chosen undead was meant to serve as fuel just like Gwyn, and while it would stop the curse temporarily, it would return many years later. Another chosen undead would rise, serve as fuel, then another, and another, and another. Continuing an endless cycle."

M-My quest…my journey…was it all a lie? Was I just a puppet to the Gods and their schemes?

"My, my.  Already in the clutches of despair, I see…you disappoint me Oscar of Astora. Are you ready to give up here? What would the people of your homeland say?"

What do you want me to do!? If what you speak off is the truth, then all I can do is nothing! 

"Not true. I plan to venture into the land of Gods and take steps to secure the Age Of Darkness, I shall also begin to make the first steps to provide a safe heaven for Humanity so they may adapt to the new age in safety."

…What do I have to do with this?

"Join me Oscar of Astora! Become my Paladin and help me save this dying world, let us forge a new better future together!"

How can I know if you are not fooling me? If you are not simply using me like the other Gods wanted to use the chosen undead?

"You can't Oscar. I would have taken you for a fool if you would trust me with just this conversation. Trust is earned over a long time. Know that if you choose to follow me, you can abandon your oath if you see it fit, but my blessing will leave you once you do."

Blessing?

"You didn't think I wouldn't bless a paladin of mine, did you?"

… I-

…

…. I shall follow you for now. And choose if I should continue doing it later.

"Very well. Swear your oath now, and we shall begin our journey."

_-_-_-_-_

"I, Oscar of Astora, one of the Noble Knights of Astora swear on my honor to serve …"

Why did be sto- Oh Shit! I didn't introduce myself, did I?

"Lucas" I said and heard the knight continue

"-to serve Lord Lucas, and use my sword in his name." As he ended his oath, the world around me became gray.

Alright, what now???

[You have gained your very first Paladin! What gift shall you bestow on him?]

Ah, right. The blessing. Let's think, what would Oscar need? 

Maybe a magic Ring? Like the Ring of Favor and Protection that Lautrec got from his Goddess? Maybe a spell, just like the warriors of sunlight or chaos servants covenants give you once you join them?

"Can I give both?" I thought out loud. "Hey, can I give Oscar more than one thing?" I asked, not needing long for a pop-up screen to appear in front of me with an answer.

[Your question shall be answered once I hear out your answer and calculate it.]

"Alright…I want him to have a ring that will enhance his speed and boosts his reaction time so he can use the extra speed without problems." After all, why have extra speed if you are unable to react to it? 

"Also an energy beam spell that he would be able to shoot out like Ichigo signature getsuga tenshou. Make it light-blue colored." A ranged attack is always handy, and since I don't know if Oscar knows how to use a bow or crossbow, what better solution than giving an option to make his sword a long-distance weapon?

[The request is acceptable]

[Ring of the wind, added]

[Cutting wave, added]

The world gained its color again. Oscar's body twitched and slowly started to move.

"Welcome to the land of the living again." Oscar stopped midway through getting up. "Now…let us begin, shall we?" I offered my hand and smiled slightly as he took it.

This can be fun actually when I think about it.