1 "Modesty is Serenity"

Part 1

Author's Pov

"Helena, come down, my child, and have dinner. After eating, do your rest preparations; you need to boost your energy, or you'll be sick. Come, have dinner, then rest for a while." Helena's mother called her in a loud voice to come. Helena came downstairs while saying,

"Yes, mom, I'm coming."

Then everyone sat at the dining table—Farris, Mr. Ahmed, and Fatima. However, Helena was setting the table and putting the dishes and plates with her stepmother helping her.

"Do some shame, Fatima. Go and help mom and Helena."

Farris said to Fatima while pouring water in the glass.

"I'm not born to do these household chores. I have my standards, and I can't let myself get tired. Got it?" Fatima made an attitude-filled look while putting a cucumber piece in her mouth and said to Farris."

As Farris knew his stepsister's nature well, he didn't say it again to her because he knew he would get another useless answer from her. As Helena and her stepmom set the table they both pulled out chairs and sat opposite Farris and Fatima while Mr Ahmed was sitting on the head chair.

Mr. Ahmed recited Bismillah and then a Dua before eating, instructed his children and wife to do the same. Helena, Farris, Mrs. Ahmed, and Fatima followed him, though Fatima made a displeased expression at his instruction because she tends to be reluctant and doesn't always do this when she is not with her father. Despite her family being modest and religious, Fatima's views differ as she desires a more modern and open-minded lifestyle, influenced by Western culture.

In contrast, Helena is devout and follows Islamic teachings diligently, influenced by her father's devoutness and upbringing. She always follows the teaching that she has told by her father about Islam and Deen.

After dinner, everyone went to their respective rooms, with Helena and Fatima sharing one. Helena went to the bathroom to performed her ablutions (wudu) and then returned to her room to pray her Isha Salah. She spread her prayer mat and started her Salah while saying Allahuakhbar, however Fatima lounged on the bed, scrolling through her phone and laughing at something she saw.

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~ Helena's POV ~

Tomorrow will be a big day for Me. It's the day when the results of my university admission test will be announced. I've been waiting anxiously for weeks, pouring all my efforts and hopes into that one entry test.

As I completed my Salah, i raised my hands for Dua and said,

"O Allah, the Most Gracious and Merciful, You know why I'm here before You. Please forgive me if I've ever disappointed You. I turn to You with hope and trust in my heart. You know how hard I've prepared for the university entry test. Ya Rabbi, I seek Your mercy. Please grant me success. You are the Greatest, the King of the entire universe. There is no God but You. Accept my humble plea and bestow Your mercy and blessings upon me. Please make the results come out in my favor.

Answer my prayers, O Lord. I rely solely on You. Shower Your mercy upon me and grant me success, my beloved Allah. Amen."

I got up from prostration, while wiping my tears and gently caressing my face with my palms.

As I lay in bed, I couldn't help but toss and turn, my mind was racing with thoughts of what the outcome might be. Also I was getting nervous while thinking about my result and my heart was beating faster than ever. I replayed the test day in my mind, remembering how hard I studied and how nervous I felt walking into the exam room. I was recalling the questions i answered confidently and the ones that left me unsure.

As i worried and talked to myself,

'What will happen if I don't make it? Will I have to wait another year to try again? What will my parents say? And what about my dreams of studying at my dream university? Then I shook my head to clear my thoughts and said while sitting on the bed, No, I have to stay positive. I did my best, and that's all I can ask for.

Then I closed my eyes, and said in my heart, "O lord please have mercy on me." But alongside my worries, there was a glimmer of hope. I knew i had done my best, and i prayed that my efforts would be enough. I hoped to see my name on the list of successful candidates, to feel the joy and relief of knowing that my hard work would pay off then I glanced at Fatima who was carelessly engaged in her phone.

Then I muttered to myself while looking at Fatima, "how careless she is , how she is unconcerned about her own test result and look at me duh here I'm going crazy. O Allah please give me patience ya Illahi." And with that i went to sleep, with reciting my dikr."

"On the next morning, I woke up at 5 am as it was time for Fajr to begin. I performed my ablution and went to the cupboard to take out the prayer mat. As I spread my prayer mat on the floor, I cried out loud in nervousness as my confidence was diminishing. I started my Salah, saying 'Allahu Akbar,' and then bent down in prostration."

As I done my Fajr Salah, I raised both palms and started my Dua with trembling lips, then I stood up from the prayer mat and went to the bookshelf where the Quran Sharif was placed. I took the Quran Sharif in my hand and returned to my prayer mat. Then, I sat on it and opened the Quran after placing it on the rail. I started reciting the Quran Sharif, my eyes getting red and puffy, but I held back my tears. After finishing my recitation, I kissed the Quran and placed it back in its rightful place."

Then I lay down my bed and didn't realize when did I fall asleep

After some hours, everyone came from their rooms as it was Sunday, and they had all slept in late. Around 11 am, they gathered for breakfast. Suddenly when I saw my test result i rush out from my room, shouting in shock, "Baba, where are you, my beloved baba? Mama, where are you all? I got it! Yayyy, I got admission to my dream university! Can you believe it?"

I said in joy to my father, holding his arms with my hands.

"I knew you could do it, Helena. I'm so proud of you, my child," Baba said with proud.

I replid to my father joyfully, my eyes was shinning brightly holding his both arm while saying.

"I couldn't have done it without your support, baba. Thank you for believing in me,"

Baba said while caressing my side head and then he hugged me gently,

" You've worked hard for this, my dear. This is just the beginning of your journey. I'm so proud of you,"

I replied while hugging him with watery eyes.

"I'm so excited to start this new chapter, baba. I promise to make you proud. I'll never let you down. I just need your support and your trust, nothing else."

Baba caressed my back and his eyes was filled with pride, then he said,

"You already have, Helena. You already have. You are my pride, my child. I'll support you and believe in you no matter what."

Then i went near to my stepmother and exclaimed,

"mama look ! your daughter did it she made it mama Helena made it."

Mama kissed my both cheeks then she said.

" Oh, Helena, that's wonderful news! I'm so proud of you, my dear."

I appreciated my stepmother for her praise with joyful and teary eyes.

"Thank you, Mama. I couldn't have done it without your encouragement. if you hadn't been with me, I couldn't have done it."

"You've worked so hard for this, Helena. This is just the beginning of your journey. Just keep going and never look back my child. You deserve this." Mama offering her words of encouragement while hugging me.

Then I replied while looking at her,

"Thank you, Mama. Just stay by my side always, I need your support as much as I need Baba's."

Well, well, well, look at you, making the whole environment dramatic! Huh...

Farris exclaimed as he approached near me, spreading his arms wide to hug me. He then turned to my stepmom and said, "Hey, pretty lady, just move aside and let me congratulate my brainy granny."

Everyone laughed at his statement. I chuckled while covering my mouth with one hand. I heard Farris teasingly say,

"Brainy granny moving up in the world from 'sleepy student' to 'academic superstar.' Congrats, girl, you nailed it. "

I playfully hit on his chest with an annoyed look.

Farris suddenly remembered that today would also be Fatima's result day. He looked around but couldn't find Fatima anywhere.

"I know where she might be." Baba said confidently, as he aware of Fatima's nature.

Baba went to Fatima and my room to check on her, with Mama, Farris, and I followed closely behind.

We were all concerned about her absence . I felt and thought that she didn't come out to congratulate me and even didn't tell about her result.

As we reached in our room, Baba smiled a little and saw Fatima was sitting at her computer table, clearly nervous about checking her result while biting her nails. Baba went to her, and gently caressed her back, and said,

"Oh, my dear Fatima, why are you so nervous? I know both my daughters have brainpower. Let's check it together hmm. Don't worry, just have faith in Allah."

Fatima looked back and forth at Baba's eyes with a worried expression. He checked the result and saw that Fatima had also passed the test but with a lower score than me. Everyone cheered for us both, but Fatima couldn't hide her disbelief and inner disappointment at not reaching Helena's level.

Meanwhile, I understood Fatima's expression and hugged her back figure with shoulder, saying, "Congratulations!" Just then, Farris came near Fatima, he understood her feelings, and hugged her too, saying, "Our little naughty girl is ready to rule Seoul National University. Woohoo. Come on, girl, get up, let's celebrate tonight together." Everyone laughed a little at his statement.

At night around 7 pm, we all went to the shopping mall for me and Fatima to purchase new clothes for our first day of university. As we reached the shopping mall, we all stepped out of the car. I was very happy, and the excitement was showing on my face that visible to everyone, that i would go to university after a week.

On the other hand, Fatima hung her head in a disappointing look. Then i noticed her and came near to Fatima and hugged her with her side arm. Fatima rolled her side eye to look at me a little she jerked away, and went from there. I kept looking at her back figure with a shocked expression.

Farris came near to me while placing his arm around my shoulder and asked, "What's wrong, brainy granny?"

I looked at Farris's face with that shocked look and said,

"Ahh uh n...Nothing. Let's go inside." Farris shrugged his shoulders. Then we all went inside the mall and started our shopping.

Meanwhile, I went to a hijab shop where I bought some different colors of hijab scarf - nude, tea pink, lilac, and off-white. I also bought a university bag along with white shoes and other important stuff and clothes.

Fatima bought some western-type clothes and a bag too.

As we all finished shopping, Farris said to us, "Now it's time to fill up our hungry stomachs. I can't feel any butterflies there, huh. Let's go and celebrate."

Everyone laughed at his statement, wondering why he's still so mischievous at this age. I hit my palm against his arm and got into the car, while on the other hand, Fatima's mood seemed to get better as she had bought so many things.

We all went to a nearby restaurant. After we ordered our favorite meals, Baba asked me and Fatima when our classes would start. Fatima wasn't aware of the schedule, so I replied, "Baba, they'll start by next Monday."

After some time, the waiter brought our meals and served us.

As we finished dinner, Fatima and I sat quietly in the car. I looked at Fatima, noticing her lost expression then I asked. "Are you okay, Fatima? Whatever it is, you know you can talk to me about it, right?"

I asked softly, while caressing Fatima's hand. Fatima jerked her hand away from me and said, "There is nothing to tell. Don't worry about me; I'm alright."

I was shocked by her attitude, but I ignored it because I knew what was disturbing Fatima. Then there was silence between us until we reached home.

We all returned home and went to our rooms to rest. I went to perform my Isha Salah, while Fatima went to bed. I reminded her to pray first, but Fatima didn't respond and turned away, and fell asleep.

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A/N

Roller coaster journey of Helena's life has begun.