I Feel Guilty

Uncle Daniel told me she was kinda closer to you, is it true? on my Birthday i met her for the first time, she never been at home, well even if she was kinda, not that much closer to you, she should have attended your funeral.

Aren't you upset with her? maybe i'm overthinking but i need to know a little about her, her habits, characters or should I even trust her like i trust Dorothy? oh no! i guess this is too much i need to stop, you maybe worried about me.

With a cute smile; Mommy, i've been single for nineteen years old, what if i falls for a French handsome boy? would i stay single? maybe he will fall for me too and i hope you can like that, right?

Don't worry i will try to be careful with boys, but i know, i will find true love there.

I will compete and focus on my dreams, boys can't fool me, they can't ruin my dreams because i won't allow them to do that. in a quavering voice; i think i'm too skinny to have a better man, i have to eat much food, at least i need to grow my butt a little, ummm like Isabelle haha! she isn't skinny and she isn't fat, that could fit me too, Good night Mommy! she slept on the grave again.

Early in the morning, she waked up and went back home, then took a shower, she had breakfast of course, she wasn't no more sad again, she went to visit San Francisco Zoo.

At the time when she went back home, she found that someone broke into the house, she got scared; "who's there? who are you? what do you want? show yourself before i call the police. don't try me, i can be dangerous, who are you?" she took a knife but her hands was shaking.

It seemed like that person was in the bathroom; "hey! who are you? no more hidding, get ready, i'm coming to you hehe! you better come out."

And when Donna pushed the bathroom's door holding a knife in her hands, Isabelle screamed very louder; "oh my God! Donna?" Isabelle? It's you? i'm really sorry, i didn't know that it was you, i just thought you're staying in New-York with my Uncle. well I'm sorry, i thought it was a thief or a serial killer, please don't mind me, I'm not what you're thinking now.

Donna it's okay, it's also my fault, i didn't inform you that I'm going to come. could you please close the door? okay!

Isabelle kept on showering, she came out of the bathroom, she wanted to have a long conversation with Donna, "Donna your hands are shaking, are you alright? did i scare you? i'm sorry but calm down, it's okay, put that knife on the table, i wanna talk to you and i won't harm you, I'm your Uncle's friend.

Donna placed the knife on the table, her hands was still shaking; okay, now we can talk well how are you? "i'm fine thank you! how are you?" i'm good, sorry, i should have informed you that I'm coming but, i didn't remember, and your Uncle and Dorothy were very busy.

So, i need your passport and ID card to request for your France Visa, oh! and photo passports of course, but we don't need to hurry that much, we still have enough time!

Where have you been? you left the house open, that's very dangerous,.."i went to visit San Francisco Zoo, i had fun!" that's great! could we have fun together? "yes of course!" thank you!

I didn't attend your Mother's funeral, that's so sad, even if we weren't that much closer but, i should have at least come to say my last word to Helen, i feel so guilty!

Well, Ms Isabelle, i can't lie and i don't like that but honestly, i wondered a lot about you, from the time when I was young up to my 20's Birthday it was my first time to see you, Mommy was lonely except that Uncle and Second Mommy Dorothy were her closest people, the time they were in New-York, Mommy seemed to be lonely and sad.

I know i have ruined her life somehow but, i know that i have motivated her too. where were you? you never been here, by the way how did you get here?

Well, it seems like i abandoned your Mother as i told you, i feel guilty, hope your Mother will forgive me and i hope you will forgive me too, i will try my best to pay for what i have done, i came here because i want to visit your Mother's grave too.

So Donna, please forgive me, okay? i will do everything i was supposed to do for Helen for you, trust me! "okay, hope Promise is a Promise, right?" Promise! what are we going to do right now? what are we going to have for dinner? "since i don't like to eat that much, let's have pasta salad!" i'm okay with that.

So, they had pasta salad for dinner; "Ms Isabelle?" you can call me Aunty "okay! i'm scared of sleeping alone." don't worry daughter, I'm coming.

So Isabelle slept in Donna's room, in the morning, they had a morning walk; "Aunty, i'm tired, can we take a rest? let's sit over there!"

come on don't be lazy. "fine!"

When they went back home, Donna accompanied Isabelle to visit Helen's Grave.

Helen, i know you may got angry at me, you may hate me as you want but, i'm here to say sorry, i mean it, please forgive me! i abandoned you, i wasn't here when you needed me, please forgive me! Isabelle bursted into tears; i can't believe now you're gone, i embarrassed myself the time i didn't attend your funeral, i was scared and dealing with some family issues, but now i promise you that i will take care of Donna.

From now she's my responsibility, i will make your family proud!

They went back home, Donna bursted into tears and Isabelle got confused; "Donna, what's wrong?" honestly, i know everyone is working hard to take care of me but, i miss my childhood, my Mother was cute, we used to go to Jeffrey's Toys Store and visit San Francisco Zoo, we used to watch cartoons together.she smiled; Mommy was kind, and nobody deserved her!