Hellshine

Greetings everyone,

I'm Kyung Dal and I've just started my journey as a writer. "HellShine" is the title of my first Webnovel. I have always wanted to read a story with such plot, but I wasn't able to find the one I wanted so I decided to write it myself. Even though I still lack in many things, such as the language, but I'm trying my best to write well. "HellShine", as the name suggests, it is related to Hell, a place which we all consider as Satan's home or better to say a place where all the evil things have gathered around and as we know already our world is like the mentioned Hell because there are still bad guys who keep forgetting they're humans. I hope you'll be reading my story and following me in this journey. I will be waiting for your comments and I'm always there to hear out your ideas about the story. You can reach me via email: IamKyungDal@gmail.com

Feel free to tell me your real thoughts on the story and I make sure to listen to your opinions and write the story in the way that we all want.

Don't forget to be extra careful in order to escape the hateful Covid-19. Nobody will be happy if you caught and our hearts will be in so much pain, so do everyone a favor and take care of your health.

Best regards,

Kyung Dal

P.s: I'm not well aware of the copyright laws so I might as well say, I designed the cover with "Medi Bang Paint" which is available on Play Store. And if you had any ideas on the cover, let me know. I'm not much of a designer so any help from you will be appreciated. Thank you

Chapter ONE

Hasn't it happened to you before? When you start to feel nothing? Like when a child smiles at you, and you keep on staring and feeling nothing? Or like how your face doesn't seem to be willing to change not anymore?

Sometimes it even drives me mad how I became like this but at the same time, I don't feel mad, and it's more like feeling nothing at all.

Like any other child, I grew up in a family, getting my share of love and nice memories with my brother, I did a good job in developing my character. Having good grades, listening to parents and obeying them, respecting elderly, willing to help without hesitation, loving the world, caring about the nature and the innocent kids who were abused, loving my country and willing to devote myself to its glory. Yes, that was me. People praised me, loved me, and accepted me, but it all seemed fake. Having a perfect personality and getting an amazing respect from society, they didn't seem to be real. I mean we all know when something's going smoothly then that means, something's fishy. Were they pretending to be nice to me or was I pretending to be nice? I couldn't answer the question no matter how I tried. Which was real? I did not know.

Years passed and I became a high school student with a heart filled with love for the world. Everything seemed to be fine, I was studying for university entrance exam which was 3 years later, my brother had gone to university, my family was still living happily together. Everything was fine until the pandemic started. The virus that had made a chaos in the world, was indeed life changing. Many nations had gone berserk but our people seemed to be doing fine. We were used to such disasters. From ancient times we were the nation that had suffered the most. Throughout history, we were standing still and not stepping back, fighting with all we had and we dare not to give up because we thought it was a shame. Considering all the horrible situations we were through, the pandemic was a piece of cake. Soon we quarantined the whole country, schools were closed, only essential jobs were open in the shortest time possible. We were standing still but the virus didn't vanish, and that was the time when everything changed in a way which no one had expected.

Our people's behavior changed, instead of being careful and help the nurses and the doctors they rebelled. Me who was still studying and trying not to lose my focus, noticed them. People weren't paying attention anymore. Nurses died, innocent people died. It was unbearable when I had locked myself in the house and they were out, spreading the virus. I had said goodbye to every outside activity that I had and they were having fun. What were nurses working hard for? For those bastards? For those murderers? Were they really the people I used to care about? I couldn't get the vibe I used to get, they were different. The blood that we all used to share was gone. They weren't the citizens whom I knew. They were inhuman.

That moment I realized that I need to study those creatures alongside my lessons. The faces, the actions, the words, in order to find real truth about the world. It didn't take that long to find out the truth, which I was blindly ignoring and thinking the society had accepted me. Yes, all my life I was being fooled by the sweet talks and the fake smiles that I had encountered but I do know for a reason that my smiles were not real like them. As time flew, hatred towards humanity arose from inside me. I cursed the people that I used to treasure, I wished for their death numerous times without a trace of guilt or sadness. I wished for their fall, I wished for them being destroyed by nature. I no longer called myself a human because I didn't want to bring myself down like them, those inhuman murderers. Since I was studying really hard nobody would talk to me so I was alone at the moments when I was becoming a real monster, my family still believed I was the person I used to be. They wanted me to be happy and laugh hysterically like I used to, and if I didn't laugh, they would try their best to make me laugh. But I couldn't feel any sincerity in their actions anymore. It felt like they only wanted me to smile and then go back to their own fake world. "You want me to laugh? You're not gonna share my sadness with me? Do you only want me to laugh while there are numerous issues tearing me apart?" That was what I used to tell myself, I never told them not even for once because I had forced myself to respect them. Even if the society hadn't accepted me, I needed my family to accept me, even though I really didn't need their approval, at least not anymore.

I was alone in my sadness and rage, and my family had no idea what I was going through. Whenever they saw me, I faked a smile. It was a fact that I hid my sadness from them and I never wanted them to comfort me, but at least shouldn't have they understood that I wasn't fine? I mean people, the eyes are the key and they reveal everything, but why didn't even my own mother never understood the pain inside me? And it's not like that I wanted them to know. I didn't want anyone to know that I was sad or angry, I just wanted to be alone.

At some point I started to fear myself, the good and pure self of mine used to bring itself up and tried to act against my impure side. One second I was happily and angrily wishing for people's death and the other second I was praying to God to keep them safe and happy. The situation was like this for a while, goodness and badness were fighting in me and because I had to study, I neglected them. I really didn't want to lose my focus because there wasn't much time left until the exam, that horrible exam which ruined my life as well as other students' lives. Many committed suicide for this ridiculous exam because the pressure was heavy. It was indeed heavy for me as well but I didn't feel anything. Everyone in my family were worried about the result but I was just not feeling any stress. I never had stress to begin with even from the very first moment of my life. So I studied and didn't pay attention to the war in my head, and Thus the day came, the exam day.