1 if only

hey guys this is my first time doing this forgive me for any mistakes thank you, enjoy.

if only I never loved you maybe I wouldn't hurt this bad. if only gave up at the start, if only I never met you maybe I might of had a better chance at love pfft who am I kidding as if I would ever had a chance at being good enough NO I will be myself and love myself haha if only I knew it would be a disaster again and again why don't I give up why??