1 My school year!

One day I decided to write to my teacher that treated me badly in 3 years. I wrote her a letter in 2014 but still have not sent it to her by uncertainty. December 2016 I was fighting between life and death. And those days I spent in intensive care, I began to think about the meaning of life. And that was when I decided that I should write down what I had written to my teacher, here on Wattpad. My purpose with this is that I want people to know what happened to me when I was a child. And to get other parents to think when it comes to their children. It's not only children who bully children, some adults bully children. And it happened to me. I will write exactly how I wrote to her.

And please no unnecessary comments !!

I tried to write several times, but have not known how to begin a letter. In this letter, I wanted to describe how I experienced my three years as a student in your class at Ängåsskolan (how you made me feel). I hope that you read the entire letter and not just throw it away. I want you to know how I feel. For today, this is in the way of my studies and my trust in teachers. This is something that has been following me since I was a child. You may not remember any of this, or you're playing stupid when you read this. But I have a very good memory when someone hurts me. Hope you read and understand what you have done to a helpless child.

When I started first grade, I was very happy and expectant of what will happen during the first school year. I was prepared to learn new things, such as read, write and even learn to count. But what I did not know, I had a teacher who hated me without any reason. I was a child (6 years old would be 7). During the three years with you as a teacher, I have felt insulted and humiliated. I have never felt such hatred from someone else. To stand in the dunce's corner doing nothing was the punishment for me without a crime. I hade several times been sitting in front of the class next to you and when someone asked (sometimes they didn't wonder what I did there and you just had to tell them what I did there) what I did there, then you said that this seat is for those who can't behave like a human, and those who not doing well and can't listen.

What I remember through these three years as a student in your class was that I was a very obedient, kind, and wonderful person who always did well. If I've been naughty under your classes like you constantly said that I was, I remember nothing out of that side of me. I was always kind and did as I have been told to do, no matter how you treated me. But who I am today, you are responsible for. What I remember more is that every time we went to the dining room, you forced me to sit with you and other teachers. Remember how you made me feel especially in front of the teachers. You embarrassed me in front of them. When my siblings and cousins were arguing with you in the dining room, and why they did it was that they saw me crying at the table and I told them how you treated me. And I saw that you were scared and tried to put all wrong on me like you always did.

I remember a break when everyone was out playing and you came out of nowhere and pulled my scarf and strangled me with it. My cousin came, she was standing on the other side and hurried to take you away from me. My cousin followed me home and told my mother how you dragged and strangled me with my scarf (i cried all the way home). When my mother and I came to the school to talk about this, you tried all the time to say that I was lying. When my mother didn't believe you then you became angry and took out a towel and said: - Look what I found. Your daughter never showers after sport. Your daughter is dirty. My mother had to constantly say to you that it was not our towel plus I have my wet towel at home that I always come home with. But you refused to listen and kept on explaining how dirty I was. I just don't understand how someone can treat a child like this.

Every time I wanted to read books and start a new level (more advanced level) to develop the Swedish language and you never accepted it and said that I will never become anything and should be left at readability level. Everyone in the class was before me. I wanted to be at the same level as them, but you stood in the way of it. When someone in the class asked why I didn't have the same book as them, you answered that I was not as smart as them. I just don't understand why you hated me so much. What did I do to make you hate me so much!? This is something I will never get an answer to. It bothers me because it ́s I who have to go around and live with it. And it takes a lot of energy from me. (Not that I think about it all the time) but when I'll tell the relatives and strangers, or if anyone was wondering how the teachers are in Sweden. I speak the truth.

And then I can walk around and think about it. This can pop up in my mind no matter where I am, and then my energy goes and it bothers me so much. I tell this to many as I can, and even shows the yearbook and which school it was. I want everyone to know this and should be vigilant when it comes to their children and their teachers! Once I get my children, I will spend much time in their classes just to ensure that no one dares to touch or harass my children, do not even look at them! I will teach my children to fight, which is called SELF-DEFENSE! Will teach them not to take crap from anyone, neither in school nor outside of school. Such as the society looks like, so you must be able to defend yourself. If you had problems in your life or not at all (which seems like it) then you have no right to treat a child that way. You have violated the children's Convention. I've talked to the police about this and they have asked me to report this even if it's a long time ago. But I told them that it was a long time ago and I'm older now, which is just an excuse, I can not stand trial now that I don't feel so good. And not only that, you're old and can't handle jail. At least I have a good heart, unlike others.

I'm now looking for a psychologist to be able to trust teachers and dare to give the studies a chance. You have done that I find it difficult to trust myself and my surroundings. Seriously, what have I done to you? it's said that jealousy plays a major in the behavior you had. You made sure I got to go from 3rd grade to 2nd grade, instead of letting me change to a better class, to a better teacher. You even got my friends, and the whole class to go against me. How can you be so cruel! This is something I can't forget. And once I started 2nd grade again, I did everything to avoid you. But when you saw me in the dining room you could not help but come up to me and ask me with a big smile on your face and asked how I was doing in the new class and with a little laugh. (I wanted to slap you right there, but I'm a better person than you!). I'm glad that I got away from you and the class. I came to a better class who liked me and a teacher who did everything to make me feel good. I love that teacher, she was the best teacher I ever had, I appreciate everything she did for me to feel comfortable in the class.

I remember even when I was in second grade, I sat with my friends and talked in class when we learned to count, and you went around to help others who needed help. A few of my friends and I was joking with each other and then someone said a bad word (even if it was me, which was NOT! You have no right to hurt a child like that). You pulled me by the arm and dragged me out of the class and scolded me. You made me cry and didn't even let me explain. It was very painful when you pulled me. And say, sit here and be ashamed of what you said.

What I remember more was that I never got help in your classes when I raised my hand (the same thing when your son was working as a substitute teacher with us). From that day I never raised my hand in the classes, because I never got help anyway. And today I sit very quietly in the classes and pretend that I understand all that is said.

I remember in the school I attended (high school), the teachers and even the students got mad at me for I kept myself on the easiest things (levels), that I could do without even trying something new (more advanced level). They always asked why do you look down on yourself? When I got this question, I knew why. It's just deep down I imagined myself that I can't be anything and are not good enough as I am. Those words are within me today, those words come from you. You've been in my mind for a long time and you don't deserve to be there. My brain is only for me and only my thoughts.

Now as I write this letter, it helped me a little to get out of my chest, that I carried within me. But this is something that will remain and follow me for the rest of my life. Every time I started courses that I liked, I ended up that I dropped out of the course. Because I could not trust myself when it came to studying. And the teachers didn't understand me. It felt like the teachers didn't care about me. Maybe it was so or not at all, but you made me who I am. Therefore, I believe that all the teachers are exactly like you. The purpose of this letter is to let you know that you have been a bad teacher/person. You destroyed my future. But I'm not going to let it be in my way. I'll have my future and throw it in your face. Make sure you die of my success. It's very hard to rely on teachers. If I had children and they went to school, I would spend all my time there just to make sure that they are well and don't have a teacher like you. God knows how I would handle such a situation. I do everything for my children!

As a teacher, you should be there and help the children to develop and learn things in life and make sure they are prepared. Prepared us for what will come. And not violate the Children's Convention. I'm just hoping you get a bad conscience over this (if you don't get it then you are not a human. A very clod person without a heart), and live with it as long as you can because you deserve it! You'll suffer as I Suffer/suffered through the years that have passed.

Today I'm 26 and still live with this.

For what? What did you get of this? Did you get some kind of kick out of it? You're a disturbed person.

I want you to think through everything I've written (and do it properly). How would you feel if someone did that to your children or grandchildren!?

You are/were and will remain the worst teacher ever. The teacher's profession suits neither you o your son.

Karma is A Bitch!

From your old student!

From: Hasime Gashi

mar 08, 2017