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Filthy Gamer in Narutoverse

Tired of one bad choice in the personalization of his trait, Kaye, now Kai, logically planned his suicide for a better chance of reincarnation to get rid of the curse that his trait had almost become. Now, Kai is in a world where people breathe fire and fart thunder! *** Warning: I'm still playing with the idea of a female and submissive Orochimaru and if you don't think fem Orochi is a waifu with a long tongue and a quirk of swallowing things then... welp. The harem and r18 stuff will happen later because I generally write them after developing a few things but the work is at a fast pace in the terms of mc's strength and growth. Slight AU. *** I do not own the cover pic, credits to the creator. If you want me to take it down, I will.

FanHarem · Anime & Comics
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237 Chs

Don't Stop the Grind

4 days of training not only included one hour of physical exercise, 6 hours of memorization about detailed human anatomy by the end of which Kushina would be on the verge of tears, and then came their distinct training as Tsunade taught a genjutsu to Kai, a basic run down of poison and antidote creation that Kai was happy to overhear as Tsunade didn't have any issue with that and taught Kushina the [Weaving Water Sword] that he had long mastered so by the end of 4 days and diligent grinding, Kai had two more skills aside from Body Flicker Technique.

[Demonic Illusion: Hell Viewing Technique (15/15): Ensnare the target in their worst nightmare whatever it may be and collect information by spying on the resulting Genjutsu. Increases the strength of mind at each level by 1. Each level reduces chakra consumption by 3.3℅. Current Consumption: 80/sec.]

Of course, Kai couldn't practice this genjutsu on villagers so animals in the training ground it is!

[Basic Chakra Poison (20/20): The ability to develop chakra-induced poisons. Each level increases the ability to mix chakra into poisonous herbs and attack and infect enemies.]

This was purely an informative skill that Kai practiced by mixing chakra with red pepper, black pepper, and any other condiments before moving to weeds, grass, and whatnot, forming diarrhea poison, itching powder, and stashing them for further troll— ehm, missions. Of course, this skill in itself held the knowledge of antidotes since they are two faces of the same coin.

And the four days of training brought advantages to his stat, too.

[Physique stat reached a threshold. Physique growth markedly improved.]

[Reduce the consumption of all stamina-based skills by a 10℅ and increased stamina regeneration by 10 times.]

[Mental Stat reached a threshold. Markedly improved the function of the mind and spirit energy.]

[Increase the willpower and ability to resist genjutsu by 1℅]

[Name: Kai

Age: 5

Title: Senju Guardian

Gamer Traits: Skill Tree; Sleepless Gamer

Rank: Genin

Hit Points: 100℅

Stamina: 100/100℅ (10.1/min)

Chakra: 7098 (2028*250℅) || (210/min) (60*250%/min)

Physique: 100/1000

Mental: 89/1000

Perception: 43/1000]

[Skill points: 307]

Reaching 100 in Physique meant that the physical gains from Ran D Taijutsu and below are all but lost. And increasing his physique with sheer physical grinding was hard but doable. After all, the chakra passively nourishes the body to some extent and he is still growing.

On the other hand, after the initial boost, it was the Perception stat that is hard to increase with just basic chakra sensing.

Still, Kai felt confident. His Chakra reserves officially surpassed Mikoto's by a tiny margin but it still wasn't a solid reserve found in most of the Chunin-ranked shinobi. Again, these ranks were based on contribution than just the skills but most chunins had close to, if not more than 10000 points of chakra. Kushina, on the other hand, threatened to reach 20000 this year... then again, Kai felt he could do that, too... in three years when he himself is 8-year-old.

It wouldn't do for him to be envious of others while grinding away with his own trait...

Even now, Tsunade had yet to teach them an actual iryo ninjutsu and made it clear that she would build their knowledge about it first and foremost since Iryo Ninjutsu was 60℅ information, 30℅ chakra control, and finally, 10℅ innovation.

Everyone silently stood in the administration office above the layer of the classroom in the Ninja Academy where Hokage gave missions to the ninjas. Tsunade stood to the side as Hiruzen observed her team.

With the forehead protector tied on his forehead, Kai wore a mesh shirt covered by a dark-blue vest and a darker-colored pair of pants with the usual shinobi sandals and a kunai pouch over his left thigh. Of course, this didn't include the seals on his finger-cut-gloved palms that held the items to use during Body Replacement Jutsu and his senbon needles laced with fast-acting diarrheal poison. Among his team, he looked the most ill-prepared but just happened to be the deadliest. His height was just a few centimeters short of Kushina and Mikoto at this point.

Kushina, on the other hand, had her long red hair tied into a high ponytail with two thick locks framing her round cheeks. Aside from a chokuto tied on her back, she wore a similar mesh top that reached her waist and a yellow kimono tunic over it with wrist guards and a pair of dark-grey pants, and her calves bandaged till her sandals.

Mikoto wore a black crop top with her mesh shirt visible underneath. Her raven hair was neatly tied into a bun with a single lock from the left while her bun was kept in place with a red senbon needle that can be used in many ways. Her left thigh was kept bandaged over which she had her kunai pouch tied and the back of her crop top was marked with a large Uchiha symbol.

"Hmm, they look ready for this mission," Hiruzen nodded as other staff members kept to themselves and went through various mission requests. Tsunade sighed and finally let a reminiscent smile touch her lips while Kushina almost bounced because of the Third Hokage's words.

Even Mikoto's dark pupils glinted with a hint of joy while Kai just kept a blank look. He realized by now that a blank look worked just about every place because of how naturally airheaded it looked.

"I appoint Team Tsunade the D-rank mission of painting the fence of one Jinoki Hara."

Okay, Kai now really felt blank while Kushina's smirk froze and Mikoto's gaze went dull.

[Rank-D Quest: A fence painted

Summary: Paint that fence.

Rewards: 2 SP

Failure: Lecture from one Hiruzen Sarutobi.]

---

"Tsunade Sensei..." Kushina whined as she pressed the paint-drenched brush on the wooden fence while Tsunade barked, "You two should learn from Kai-kun! Look at him!"

The pouting Mikoto and Kushina looked at Kai who was done with the third of what was appointed to him and he flashed a mocking grin.

"He's only doing this because..." Kushina wanted to fight. She did. But... why was HE doing this? What could motivate him to be so quick about a task this pathetic?

Even Mikoto frowned but then she looked at Tsunade who had her arms crossed and felt her gaze attracted to two large things... the law of gravity dictates that larger objects attract others... 'He couldn't be trying to... the DOG!' Mikoto's glare sharpened and she huffed out of a sudden and started painting the fence.

Kushina and Tsunade only dumbly looked at the Uchiha before shrugging and then Tsunade's glare did make the redhead get back to work!

---

[Earned 2 SP]

'Ah, what a bountiful harvest.' Kai smiled as he walked under the scrutinizing gazes of his teammates and worse, his Sensei.

Even Tsunade expected Kai of all kids to revolt. The boy was a genius... but was he really THAT obedient to even complete a D-rank mission with such gusto. She knew that once her sensei reads her report and their current temperaments... he would jump in joy and squeal like a little girl. Strong shinobi are needed for the growth of the village. OBEDIENT and strong shinobi are necessary for its survival.

But... Tsunade knew her grandmother. She was a... well, she-devil in almost every possible sense and she couldn't see her taking interest in a malleable personality even if the boy still rubbed her feet.

'Why should I even be worried? Actually, it's great. With this, missions can be completed quickly, they will have more time to train and we can soon leave the village for riskier missions to train.'

Once they dispersed, Tsunade returned to the clan compound and a small shadow bolted in her arms.

"Onee-san! You took so long to return! I'm already done with my mission!" Tsunade looked down at the boy who hugged her and looked up with a bright grin. Unlike his rather 'aloof' persona, Nawaki was just a cheerful kid. Smiling and touching his forehead protector, Tsunade grinned, "Is that so? You've already become the shinobi of the Senju, hmm? Is Orochimaru teaching you well?"

"Yep, Sensei taught us the body flicker technique! It's so cool! Oh, and we also completed our 15th D-ranked mission today!"

Although Tsunade smiled and outwardly agreed with Nawaki as he led her back to their residence while explaining his exploits exaggeratedly but she was greatly alarmed inwardly. Why wouldn't she? Even Tsunade could see that the best way to cripple a clan is by removing the clan heirs and it was clear to everyone that Tsunade wasn't satisfied with being a Matriarch and the responsibility would most likely fall on Nawaki. Should someone target him...

She shuddered internally.

Even if the Senju holds familial relations higher than power and Nawaki's death may not cause any problem to the clan... what about her? The death of her brother would still leave her devastated.

After having snacks with her brother, she went to the intimate funeral of their recently deceased where he was cremated. Most Ninja clans have the tradition of cremating the dead and even the Konoha Cemetry only held the tombstones and nothing more. A shinobi's body is a wealth of information and there have been just too many grave robberies to not cremate the corpses. The First Hokage was cremated after his death and it is said that the Second Hokage went out with a literal bang, leaving none of his body for others to exploit.

The only thing that separates a noble shinobi clan from an ordinary clan and civilians is bloodline or unique jutsus. The Kekkei Genkai has always been a topic of great research and their clan's kekkei genkai happens to be their resilient body and a high chakra growth rate during their growth spurts.

'Son of a bitch! She knew!' Tsunade realized something. Iwagakure has been an enemy of Konoha for too long to NOT take the body of their recently fallen. Why would Iwa leave it when they could have sealed it for later use?

If she can see that someone was behind this act who wanted to weaken the Senju but not strengthen the other village then so could Mito and as she said... someone from within the village did this!

She really should have given more attention to the clan's political training... or she could now learn from her mistakes and let someone else learn it thoroughly!

There was a clear candidate and she now had the perfect excuse!

After the funeral, a member left to contact the cemetery and have a tombstone erected for the man while Tsunade sat in front of tens of leading shinobi and kunoichi of the clan.

Clearing her throat, Tsunade began calmly. She was far younger than these men and women but she was also far stronger and unlike the Konoha council, these men had her back and taught her what would be good for the clan but none of them could compare to her grandmother.

"Thank you for coming back at such short notice... I feel that there is a need to discuss some changes for the upcoming event and our preparations must not be lacking. First of all..."

And with that Tsunade didn't stop for the night. Some of her changes were brought to a more better path from the Senju Council and once they left, Tsunade was eager to slap all their faces once they tried to persuade her into taking the role of the permanent matriarch!

As If!

The problem was that... she might just alert whoever was behind these acts. It was either this or letting her clansmen get slaughtered unknowingly. She thought that Grandma would have had a better approach but she made it clear that helping Tsunade was not a problem but she won't just make decisions for her and Tsunade grudgingly accepted that. After all, she also didn't hold the hands of her team while teaching them new things, and thank god for that!

The changes they mentioned would be introduced slowly. The quickest Tsunade felt that others would notice is in a month or so, just right for the timing of another council meeting.

---

The month has been dull for Kai. The only friend of his this month was the grind. The only lover to him was the grind. The only release he needed was the grind!

Oh, and missions, too!

D-rank missions rule!

Low risk and high rewards, at least, to him.

[Earned 46 SP.]

Although this was one of the rare months where he had no new additional skill, the fact that Kai managed to persuade Tsunade for more D-rank missions than the agreed 20 was horrifying to Mikoto and Kushina. They would fight him... but the bastard had gotten strong. So they fought him together without a hint of shame that one was almost 6 years older and the other 4.

And it just turned out to be too great of a physical grind that Kai loved every single second of it.

Yet, the lack of new skills allowed him to focus on the incomplete skills he had. After all, he can only hold 5 incomplete skills at once and Kai loved this space as empty as possible. So, he gave into grind in the night, too. Expending amount of chakra that would appall Chunin and Jonins!

Since Mito already seemed to know what he was upto, he went all out with the grind. Sure... he acted to sleep, too. Scratch that, sleeping being optional meant shit. He loved to sleep and would sleep whenever he was free of the grind despite the protests of Tsume, Kushina, Mikoto, and Minato to hang out. The hell would he do with the plebs? Eat dangos? Ramen? Nah, the month is always short, the day even shorter and if he could make use of the free time to grind away one of the more needy skills, he would!

He would have time for fun... later. He could always make time, right? Yes... he can...

But just a month of not paying them too much attention made their 'changes' far too prevalent and before he could curse the sweet grind for missing out on some rather amusing trolls and shits he could have caused with his storage of itching powder, he was called in by a mischievously smiling Mito who had a task for him.

***

Shoutout to Andrew, The Rew, Keldris, Primordi, ExitialeUmbra, Danny, Nikita Yablochkov, and Angel Diaz!!

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