13 Chapter 12. Redemption

Author: me

Type-Moon (Nasuverse)

Chapter 12. Redemption

"Although no redemption will change the past, it has the power to heal us, to restore relationships and connections we thought were lost forever," voice-over

*****

Lunar World is a cruel and merciless place. Soaked in blood and permeated with cold. The shadows in this world lie long, and the light seems unwilling to dispel the darkness. Every day innocents die here in agony at the operating table, in agony on the altars. Every night the Magi go mad here. And it's a pittance on the life of anyone who didn't accept it and try to change it.

But is it so? Whoever said that the world's troubles are the fault of the "World" itself is a fool. It is not the Lunar World that is cruel, but the Wizards who live in it. Mad and oppressive Mages, whose souls have long been corrupted by the yearning for the Source. They are the ones who traded human morality for a grain of power and knowledge. Is there a difference between a monster and a Mage seeking the Truth? There is, monsters are cruel by nature.

But there are also those among them who have realized the inhumanity of their path. Those who are disappointed in themselves and in the world. They are ironically called "The Hanged Men" in the Moon World. The Hanged Man is the Mage who has decided to atone for his sins, often by his death.

Kiritsugu was one such Mage. As a man whose entire life was built on the principle of killing the minority, thereby saving the majority, he was not up to his elbows in blood, no, his entire soul was soaked in death. It wasn't until three years ago that the Magus Killer realized the bitterness of his path. His ideals had been shattered, and that childhood dream of becoming a "Hero of Justice" had turned gray. Perhaps if he hadn't found Sora in that fire, Kiritsugu would have lost his mind long ago. A man with shattered ideals, unfulfilled dreams, and who had lost all meaning to live. That man was Kiritsugu Emiya.

◊◊◊

It was a day after the battle at Einzbern Castle. Sora and Kiritsu had barely made it home, and they were exhausted. The wounds were gone, but the mental fatigue of two days had taken its toll.

- You're going to leave me like this? - Sora did not want to believe that Kiritsugu had made such a decision. - How foolish! Giving up your life for redemption?!

Now Kiritsugu lay unconscious in the room. Weak and crippled, he was unlikely to live longer than three days. At least the Mage Killer was already dead, Kiritsugu's Magical Chains had been swallowed up by dirt and had fallen into disrepair.

- Human emotion is unbelievable. - Luci commented on Sora's disruption, leaning against the door. - I don't understand, if you're in so much pain and discomfort, why aren't you using Synergy?

- Where were you? - Before his adventure, Sora wanted to call Lucy, but he seemed to have fallen through the cracks. - If you'd come, you could have done something to help. And then maybe... - Lucy interrupted him.

- Impossible. Even if I had been there, I wouldn't have been any help. I'm a weak little demon cat. - Lucy didn't usually talk about himself like that, but now, to support his friend, he decided to swallow his pride. - Besides, that's your story. Of course I'm a very important part of it, but you are the main character. So I wouldn't really do anything. - I didn't have to break the fourth wall.

- ...heh, demon cat. - Such an old joke amused him. - Using Synergy at times like this, would I live a normal life then?

- You're already insane. Damn "Creature Larva," if you weren't so weak, you'd have to keep your emotions in check by any means necessary. Otherwise, the destruction of this world would be the least of your misfortunes.

- Perhaps, someday in the future, I will become one, but then it is better to experience the full range of sensations of being human now. - Sora gave little thought to his possible future. He never considered himself to be anything great or serious, let alone beings of the level of the Demiurge or higher. - Well, if you think I'm so scary, why don't you tell me where you put your contraband?

- It's a corporate secret. Just know that the land you rent is of the highest quality.

Finished talking, Sora went to check on his father. Kiritsu's condition was worsening by the hour. As the wielder of the Eye of Knowledge, Sora saw his father's life force dwindling, the curse, that filth, was consuming his loved one's life, and there was nothing he could do.

Among all the Magic he had studied, there was not one that could save Kiritsugu. Only Avalon, the sacred sheath of Excalibur in his astral body, could help, but it only showed its power in the hands of its true owner, King Arthur. Kiritsugu told me that it was a so-called Noble Phantasm, a "crystallized miracle," a weapon created by the fantasies of men based on weapons or abilities belonging to Heroes from legends, myths, and fairy tales. Perhaps if Sora had found a way to use Avalon...

- Sora. - his father's faint voice called out to him. - Do you think I'm a bad man?

- Definitely... but who among the living Mages is a good one? Even I've killed before.

- I'm glad you feel that way about homunculi. Your sister, she is a miracle born of the union of a human and a homunculus. I hope you will find some common ground with her.

- I will save her, don't worry. - Kiritsugu was silent in response, as if he knew full well that his son would.

- It's hard to talk to your child about death. - Stumped and not knowing what to say next, Kiritsugu only continued after a few seconds. - In our library, in the secret compartment of our desk is my diary, read it. Learn more about this world, about your enemies, and about me.

- It is not your dying wish, is it?

- Of course not. With your reading speed, you'll do it faster than I'll die.

◊◊◊

The library in the Emiya family home was arranged in a simple style. Tall, under two meters tall bookcases stood in rows, completely filled with books, they exuded an atmosphere of sacred knowledge. This effect was due to the fact that the cabinets were dotted with magical books, making the level of Mystery higher in this place.

In the corner was a table, the side of which was open. Sora was sitting at the table reading an old notebook, all scribbled in strange letters. It was a cipher. Natalia Kaminski, Kiritsugu's guardian and teacher, had taught his father to read and write in the cipher, and Kiritsugu in turn had taught it to Sora. Reading the diary, Sora was amazed at how little he knew, even after reading so many books on Magic.

"... The original purpose of the ritual was to restore the Third Magic, "Heavens Feel", which had been lost by the Einzberns. Around 1790, three families (led by Justeaze Lizrich von Einzbern, Tosaka Nagato and Makiri Zoken), created a ritual that opened the gateway to Akasha...

...Since, at the time, the Mage Association and the Church forbade fighting to the death, an area in the Far East that was not under the control of the Church was chosen as the venue. The Ainzburns, using alchemy, created and prepared the vessel for the Grail, the Tosaka provided the necessary territory and summoned the Servants, and the Makiri stabilized the original elements and created the Command Spells to control the Servants. The War of the Holy Grail was designed by Justice, and it was also to be the key to the ritual...

...The Great Grail was created by creating a great chain of many multi-layered Signs carved into a bare rock over 50 meters in diameter. It was covered with several layers of chains, drawing many geometric figures. Justeaze stood at the center of it and was the key that reproduced the Third Magic. The Holy Grail must exist without her, as she would be needed for the "Heavens Feel". This process was controlled by Kischur Zelretch Schweinorg...

...As of today, only the Tosaka wish to reach Akasha, while the Ainzbern and the Makiri want the birth of the completed Grail, that is, the restoration of the Third Magic."

Turning the page, Sora saw a complex magical circle composed of many geometric shapes, curved lines, and inscriptions.

- A magical circle for summoning a servant. Except that to summon a servant you must chant an aria and a catalyst... and no, a catalyst is not necessary.

Discovering a hitherto unknown part of the Magical World, Sora immersed himself like a sponge absorbing knowledge. Had it not been for Kiritsugu, he would have never left the library.

◊◊◊

So two days passed. During that time, Taiga came to visit her father and son. The girl in love knew at first sight that something was wrong. No matter how much Kiritsugu tried to prove to her that it was just a common cold, her "tiger" instinct told her that it was not true. It was only by asking Sora that she got the truthful answer.

- He's dying. I don't know exactly how much time he has left, but obviously not much. - Sora couldn't tell her that by looking her in the eye. He was well aware of his older sister's feelings and knew how painful it was to lose a loved one.

- ...dying? - Shocked by this revelation, she was stunned. Kirtsugu, she had fallen in love with him at first sight and for three years her feelings had only grown stronger. And now she is told he is dying, how should she react? - Because of what? Is there... is there anything I can do to help?

- I don't know. The old man doesn't tell me. - He didn't feel comfortable lying to her. But the very thought of introducing her to the Lunar World made him want to lie.

They stood in silence, not that they needed to talk. Beautifully aware of each other's feelings, it was as if they were in a resonance that eased that pain. Looking up into the sky, tears rolled down Tyga's face. Sora hugged her without a word. Standing like that, they felt such a needed, warm and necessary family bond. Only after a couple of minutes, Taiga calmed down and wiped away her tears.

- I'm going to stay at your house. May I? - As if begging, she forced the last words out of her.

- Of course.

◊◊◊

It was an unusually warm, wintry night. Stars were constantly falling from the sky, leaving a fleeting, bright trail behind them. Kiritsugu and Sora sat on the veranda, gazing at the moon. Kiritsugu's face had turned white as snow and his eyes were even more blank, but now they seemed much more alive than ever before.

- You must have read my diary, what did you think of your old man's life?

- You were cool. - As if he were a child, he answered without hiding his thoughts. - Are these "Origin Bullets" really that strong?

- They've never let me down, not once. - Kiritsugu answered, remembering his missions. - I'm not a Mage anymore, so everything I own is yours now.

- Why are you doing this? Why this atonement? We could live happily as a family, but... but why?

- Life doesn't always happen the way you want it to. - As he waited for these questions, Kiritsugu sighed. - I am a selfish person, Sora. And I apologize for that, but I can't help it. As a child, I killed my own father out of revenge, but I justified myself in saving many lives that would have suffered from his quest for Source. I justified myself and acquired the dream of becoming a "Hero of Justice. I wanted to save people, Sora, but by saving one, you condemn another to death. And that vicious circle has closed. - Telling Sora what he had never said before, Kiritsu felt relieved, even if his son was disappointed in him.

- In the end, the Fourth Grail War broke me. Having lost my wife and daughter, I went mad in that fire. The fire burned me, too. But when I saw you standing there, unbroken, unconscious, I felt hope again, because I could save someone. In that moment I knew I wanted to protect you, to give you what I didn't have, a family. I know I wasn't a good father, but I tried to do everything I could to make you happy.

- Silly, silly old man. - Sora made a terrible discovery about his father...

He realized that the man before him was not his dying father, but a little boy. A boy like himself, a boy who had grown up and played the role of father as best he could so that his child would have something mythical and infinitely important: a protector who protects his child from the disastrous possibilities of life. The pain of this realization tore his heart even deeper.

-As my parting gift," Kiritsuga took Sora's hand, "I will give you my most precious possession as Emiya, the Magical Emblem. - Sora felt a flow of Prana through his body, and his forearm began to heat up.

- Ever since you were a child, I have been drawing magical circles and inscriptions on your hand. From the moment I decided to teach you Magic, I knew what my last lesson would be to you, Sora.

- An array of several dozen magical circles glowed on his small forearm, pierced with jagged lines and runes. - When you save someone, don't do it because you're a "hero" or because you have to, but because your heart told you to.

Letting go of his son's hand, he looked up at the sky. The moon, which had seemed to him all his life a symbol of horror and vice, was now so beautiful. Turning his gaze to his son's tearful face, he only smiled paternally and covered his eyes...

That's how his father died, no, that's how his Dad died.