1 Fading Portrait

Ria flinched when she felt someone grabbed her shoulders. Pero agad rin naman siyang kumalma nang makitang si Jacob pala ito, her boyfriend for four years.

"Good morning baby," Jacob greeted and kissed her in the cheeks. That made Ria smile. She greeted back with a hug. "What are you doing?" he asked at nagbaba siya ng tingin sa mga papel na nagkalat sa table sa harapan nila.

"I'm trying to finish my piece para mai-submit ko na ito sa client," Ria answered as she flashed a sweet smile. Napangiti rin naman sa kanya ang binata.

"You are?" Pinulot ni Jacob ang isa sa mga papel at maigi itong tiningnan.

"What do you think? Maganda ba? Tatanggapin kaya iyan ng client?"

Muling napangiti si Jacob at marahan siyang tumango sa dalaga. "It's beautiful," he said na nagpangiti lalo kay Ria.

"Really? I've been awake the whole night just to finish this!" Kinuha niya sa binata ang papel saka ito marahang hinaplos ng kanyang namumutlang kamay.

"Uhm…do you want to go out? Pwede tayong maglakad-lakad," Jacob suggested pero napailing si Ria.

"Nah…I'll just stay here. Tatapusin ko na muna ito. It's due tomorrow, remember?" Nilingon niya ang nobyo na nakatayo sa likuran niya saka ito nginitian. Jacob forced a smile.

"Okay, I'll just stay here too."

Naglakad patungo sa bintana si Jacob kung saan kita ang malawak na bakuran sa labas. You can see bunch of flowers outside na may iba't-ibang kulay. People are walking there—smiling and talking to the people they're with.

Naupo si Jacob sa tabi ng bintana saka niya muling binalingan ng tingin si Ria na naging abala ulit sa ginagawa. Isang ngiti ang iginawad niya rito bago niya kinuha ang cellphone sa kanyang bulsa. Agad niya itong binuksan at nagtungo sa gallery kung saan daan-daang litrato ang agad na bumungad sa kanya. He started scrolling—looking at every picture intently.

Ria took one paintbrush and dab it at the paper. She did that for a couple of minutes bago siya napalingon sa gawi ni Jacob. Jacob's still seated by the window at abala ito sa pagkalikot sa kanyang cellphone. Ria frowned when she saw him smile, na para bang naaaliw ito sa tinitingnan. Binitawan niya ang paintbrush na hawak saka siya napatayo at naglakad patungo kay Jacob.

"What are you doing?" she asked pero hindi siya sinagot nito at simpleng tiningnan lamang siya. Nagbaba muli ito ng tingin sa kanyang cellphone kaya tuluyan nang napalapit sa kanya si Ria.

Ria found her boyfriend staring at another woman's picture na nakasave sa cellphone niya. She felt annoyed…and betrayed.

"Who the heck is that?" naiinis niyang tanong.

"I can't help but admire her," Jacob answered without looking up. Bahagya siyang naguluhan sa sagot nito. Muli siyang nagbaling ng tingin sa litrato at doon niya napagtantong kilala niya ang babae. It's someone who she met a few years ago. But that woman passed away—that woman is dead.

"Why do you have a picture of her? She's already dead." Hindi maintindihan ni Ria kung bakit may litrato niya si Jacob. She can't understand too why her boyfriend admire her when in fact she's already dead.

Ibinaba ni Jacob ang cellphone niya saka napayuko. Isang malalim na hininga ang kanyang hinugot bago siya muling nag-angat ng tingin sa girlfriend.

"Let's eat dinner? Ano ba ang gusto mong kainin?" he said ignoring Ria's question at pilit niya itong nginitian. Inirapan siya ng girlfriend pero dahil kinulit niya ito ay nagpahila na rin ito sa kanya. They went on the dining area together and ordered food that they shared with few of the people there. After dinner ay hinatid rin pabalik ni Jacob si Ria sa kanyang silid. Sandali silang nag-usap bago nagpaalam si Jacob na uuwi.

Pasalampak na naupo si Jacob sa kotse niya. Muli niyang ibinaling ang tingin sa gusali sa harapan at ang kaninang pinipigilang luha ay tuluyan na ngang kumawala.

"Don't fade…" he pleads saka siya napayuko at isinandal ang ulo sa manubela. Sandali siyang nanatili roon para pakalmahin ang sarili bago nagmaneho paalis ng lugar.

• • •

Nakagawian na ni Jacob na puntahan si Ria everyday after work. This is his routine for the last two years, but this day ay may dinaanan muna siya bago nagtungo sa girlfriend.

"Hi baby!" he greeted Ria at agad naman itong nagbaling ng tingin sa kanya. Pero agad rin itong natigilan nang makita ang batang hila-hila ni Jacob. "This is Jeah. I brought her here para makapaglaro kayo." Dinala niya ito palapit kay Ria and the kid looks excited upon seeing her. Pero hindi pa sila tuluyang nakakalapit ay napatayo na si Ria at napaatras.

"Take that kid away from me!" sigaw niya. Ria got hysterical and this frightened not just Jeah but also Jacob na mabilis kinarga ang bata especially when she started crying.

Ria's shout filled the room na umagaw na rin sa atensyon ng iba. Jacob tried to calm her down but Ria ignored everything at patuloy na nagwala.

"Stop this already Ria!" hindi na napigilang sabihin ni Jacob. He wants her to stop, not just this but everything that's happening to her. Ria didn't listen at first pero nang makita ang takot sa mukha ni Jacob at ang pag-yak ni Jeah ay tumigil din siya.

"J-Jac…" She tried to reach out for them pero napahakbang na palayo si Jacob. "I'm sorry. I don't—I just…"

Napailing si Jacob. "I'm trying my best Ria. Nakakapagod pero sinusubukan kong magpakatatag para sa atin…para sa anak natin. But this is too much!"

"A-Anak?"

"Yes! Jeah's our daughter Ria. Please remember that. Please…"

"But…but I don't have a child. I don't…" Hinawakan ni Ria ang kanyang ulo—grabbing it like she's hurt there. Magkasunod namang pumasok ng silid ang doctor at mga nurses ng facility para daluhan si Ria. One of them took a syringe at tinurukan ng pampakalma si Ria.

Agad rin naman itong nawalan ng malay. The nurses laid her on the bed while the doctor checked her up.

"You said she's getting better…" Jacob said. "She's been here for two years now, pero hindi pa rin siya gumagaling. You clearly said that she's getting better…but look at her. Is that what you call better?"

Nagbaling ng tingin ang doctor kay Jacob at pilit siya nitong nginitian. "Mr. Alvarez, I know this is hard to believe but for the course of two years…Miss Garcia improved a lot. She now remembers her name, and she remembers you. We don't know when she'll recover but we need to support her. Don't give up on her yet. Miss Garcia is fighting too. She's also trying to get cured, hindi mo man iyan napapansin…but she's trying." Tinapik sa balikat ng doctor si Jacob bago ito lumabas ng silid kasama ang mga nurse.

Nang tuluyan silang makalabas ay agad na nagbaling ng tingin si Jacob kay Ria. Pati si Jeah na tumahan na ay nagawa ring lingunin siya. Ria's lying on her bed—now asleep and breathing softly.

Napahinga nang malalim si Jacob saka mahigpit na niyakap ang anak.

• • •

Ibinaling ni Ria ang tingin sa kanyang gilid nang magmulat siya ng mata. Agad niyang nakita si Jacob na nakaupo sa isang silya sa gilid ng hinihigaan niya. Karga niya ang ngayo'y tulog na si Jeah.

Ria felt a sting in her heart nang makita ang dalawa. She tried to look away pero napansin na siya ni Jacob.

"Baby, are you awake?"

Nilingon niya ang binata pero hindi niya ito nagawang sagutin. Bumaling ang kanyang tingin kay Jeah na nakasandal ngayon sa dibdib ni Jacob.

"The little girl…" she started but Jacob cut her off.

"I'm sorry. The babysitter didn't come so I have no choice but to bring her here."

Napayuko si Ria especially when she remembered the incident earlier. Hindi niya mawari kung bakit naging ganoon siya but when saw Jeah earlier, she felt fear.

Naupo siya sa kanyang hinihigaan and Jacob tried to help her pero dahil karga niya si Jeah ay hindi niya ito nagawa.

"She's our daughter?" Ria asked.

"You remembered what I said earlier?" Tumango siya bilang tugon and this made Jacob smile. "For the last two years, you don't remember things as easily as this."

Ria forced a smile—not really sure what to say.

"I'm sick, right?" tanong niyang muli.

"Ria…"

"I know I'm sick. Well, I'm not really sure but I think I am." Muli niyang binalingan ng tingin si Jeah. "Can you tell me everything? Can you tell me why I can't remember having a daughter?"

"But…" Jacob hesitated.

"Please Jacob. Tell me everything."

Napahinga nang malalim si Jacob saka niya tinanguan si Ria.

"Two years ago…you went on a vacation with your sister. Brianna and you decided to go on a resort to have fun and create more happy memories together. But an accident happened."

That time, the two rode a boat to an island  na gusto nilang pasyalan pero lumubog ang bangkang sinasakyan nila. Brianna's an excellent swimmer but Ria's not kaya tinulungan siya ng kapatid. But Brianna drowned and died.

Isinugod sa hospital si Ria and they found out that she's two weeks pregnant. She then woke up a few days after the incident but she didn't take the news really well. The news about the death of her only sister resulted to her mental breakdown.

Dinala si Ria sa isang facility para mabantayan ang mental health niya pati na rin ang kanyang pagbubuntis. Ilang linggo siyang tulala after nang nangyari but eventually she started speaking again.

"But you started behaving like you're someone else…" Napalingon si Jacob sa table na laging tinatambayan ni Ria. Nagkalat roon ang mga papel na kahit gaano mo pa tingnan ay blanko talaga.

Napalingon din doon si Ria. She can see her art materials there. Those papers na may mga guhit niya. Her paintbrushes na madumi dahil sa mga pinturang ginagamit niya. Pero lahat ng iyon ay nasa isipan lamang ni Ria. She never made any paintings—she only believes that she had.

"There's even a time you called yourself Brianna."

Napayuko si Ria after hearing that. After Brianna's death, Ria blamed herself. If her sister didn't save her…she might still be alive. That's when she started imagining and believing that Brianna's the one who survive the accident and not her. She started living as Brianna. Even after giving birth to Jeah, iyon lamang ang nasa isip niya. Kamakailan lamang nang mag-improve ang kondisyon niya. She started calling herself Ria again, and even remembers Jacob now. But as the doctor said, it will take time for her to completely recover at bumalik sa dati.

"Ria…" Jacob called at inabot nito ang kamay niya. Nag-angat siya ng tingin and she can see sadness in her boyfriend's eyes.

"Why didn't you give up on me?" Ria asked.

"I can't...because I love you."

Ria smiled at hinigpitan pa niya ang hawak sa kamay ni Jacob.

"That woman in the picture…that's me, right?" tanong niyang muli na agad tinanguan ni Jacob. He reached for his phone at hinanap ang picture na tinitingnan niya noong nakaraan. It's a picture of Ria before the accident. "You said you admire her—that you admire me. Why?"

"Because you're an amazing person Ria. You don't give up on things, especially those important to you." Tiningnan niya si Ria at nginitian ito. "And you gave me Jeah."

Napangiti si Ria. Muli siyang napatingin kay Jeah saka niya marahang hinaplos ang pisngi ng anak.

"It will take time, but please stay beside me hanggang sa gumaling ako."

"I will…And thank you for not fading away baby. I love you so much!"

"I love you too Jacob…you and Jeah!" Hinalikan ni Jacob ang noo ni Ria at mahigpit niya itong niyakap pati na ang anak.

They don't know how long it will take…but now they're sure their love will never fade.