Almost Vomiting

(Levar Point of View)

Not even halfway through the movie, I just can't take it anymore. There is so much gore and so many jumpscares. I just can't keep watching. I am so tempted to just hide away. I can't close my eyes as I keep seeing the gore. I hate this so much. I can't take this. I want to leave so much but I can't seem to. I might vomit soon if I keep watching. I really can't take this. I can feel my legs. I am shaking so much. I just want to run out of the room but I can't. I can't take this. 

I jump slightly when I feel an arm wrapping around me. I look over and I see Asaka looking down at me worried as she has her right arm wrapped around me.

"Darling? Are you alright?" I can tell she is trying to stay quiet to not interpret the movie.

I nod my head slightly as I rest on her. When another kill happens, I bury my head into her arm. I just can't watch it. I can't. It's too much for me but I can't close my eyes or else I will see it more. I have my head facing away from the TV so it isn't dark and I see it again but I don't have to look at it. I can still feel myself shaking but it's not as much as before. I still can't feel my legs but I do feel safe. Why did I feel so safe? Is it from Asaka? It has to be. This is nice. I'm sure that she is just holding me because she saw me shaking and just wanted to see if I am fine. I'm sure that it is nothing else. But she is so warm and she feels safe. Like a home that I have never had. I honestly want to stay in her arms. She is so soft and warm. I don't want to leave her arms. Wait, does this make me less of a man? No, it wouldn't. Does she think so? I mean she wrapped her arm around me first and I mean it's clear that she is a lot stronger than me so I doubt that is what she thinks.

After a few minects of Asaka holding me, I have stopped shaking and I can feel my legs again. This feels nice but I should get off of her. After all, if I am feeling better then I did before so I should get off of her but still, this feels really nice. I don't want to leave. If she knew how I was thinking right now she might hate me. After all, there is so much she doesn't know about me and I am like cuddling her arm. I just hope that she doesn't see differently with me doing this. 

When I hear that the movie is over, I feel Asaka moving around as I hear some whispering between Asaka and Frey. I don't care to hear what they are saying because then I would have to move and plus they are being quiet so I'm sure they are talking about something I shouldn't listen to. I don't know why they are talking about it in front of me but I don't really care. Also, I am tired. I don't know why I am so tired but I am. I stay still, not wanting you to move from her warmth but she starts picking me up. I grab onto her. I hear her chuckle slightly as she carries me. I feel her set me down on a bed before she quietly leaves. The room seems to be the same room that I woke up in to begin with when I came here. I kind of wish that she stayed and would cuddle with me. Wait. No. What am I thinking? We are friends, that's it. I shouldn't be thinking about this. I know the feeling of trying to befriend a male and they fall in love with me, I can't do that. We are just friends. Right? She does see me as a friend, right? I mean I don't know what else our relationship would be. After all, she did bring me to her place and not any of the others so clearly that means something, right? Maybe I am just looking into this too much. Maybe I should just fall asleep. After all, I am tired and it should help me not think about what happened. Plus, I shouldn't look too much into it. She was just holding me because I was scared, nothing else. 

I take off my shirt and I lay down on my stomach to sleep. I'm not use to going to bed unless I am really tired from work but I guess I should now as I won't be going into work for a while.