Chapter 16: Piece of Memories
The melodies of morning swimming through the air, chirping birds and calm breeze classing together. The leaves that were blown by the wind created a flute like sound, almost like a whistle in the morning. This morning embraced by the small animal cheerfully, even though winter soon will comes around, and all of them going to sleep.
Joshua, the poor soul, still engulfed himself inside the warm embrace of the blanket, curled into the baby position. Still feeling like a cracking glass yet to be broken. So cold he thought to himself, he just wanted to just sleep and forget everything. He felt a big part of him refuse to wake all his body parts, but another part of him, the small yet stronger, forced him to open his eyes.
A song playing not far from his ear, as much as he likes that song, he can’t lie that it’s disturbing him. The song kept playing in the loop from the device that vibrated on the table that was not far from his bed.
The boy's upper body rose, his hair still untamed, eyes still closed. But his entire face shown displeased about the entire situation, hisses comes out from between his teeth. Doesn’t bother with anything, he snatched his phone and without looking at the caller name he picked up the call.
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I sighed heavily, I could hear some mumbling voices from the other side, but my brain and consciousness were not yet able to process it. I try to shake my head and rub my eyes, and the voice starts getting clearer.
“Don’t tell me that you are still sleeping”
A familiar cold and rough voice can be heard as soon as I touch the dial button on the screen.
With how early this is, I’m totally not in the right mood to answer anyone. The voice that is talking on the other side doesn’t have anger or annoyance in the tone, but still sends me flying to the high alert mood swing.
“This is…”
My voice cracked while trailing off the memory lane trying to match the owner of the voice.
“It’s me Daniel, let’s talk about our group work”
I pull my phone that was glued to my ear and inspect the screen display, my sleepy eyes starting to focus from the blurry image. An image where I am sleeping on a onesie with a man buried in the crook of my neck starts getting clearer. The more I squinted my eyes to the one part of the image, the more that digital form give me right display of time.
[07:01]
The moment I realize what time this is actually, I want to teleport to the other side and punch Daniel square in the face. I bring the phone to my ear once again, and try to contain the anger, but of course I can’t.
“Goodness, for god sake! Daniel what time is this?!”
All I hear is Daniel's voice laughing teasingly to my anger tone.
“I’m not even reached the school yet, and this is early in the morning”
The laugh did not even die down.
I let myself fall down, my face immediately hits the pillow buried once more. I lazily rolled to the side and let my back lay on the bed. My eyes are looking at the white ceiling, but my mind already goes to Daniel and kicks him.
“Fine then, I’ll wait for you at the school parking lot, make sure you come with some snack”
As soon as the voice stops speaking, not long after the call cut short. I buried myself to the pillow once again, I sniffed up all my own scent back to my nostril. Why suddenly people like to wake me up early in the morning like this? I don’t have class today. I really don’t want to be bothered anymore.
Alas, I still bring myself to clean up and prepare to go out, even stuff up some necessary things for a long period of time outside.
My hands froze in the air, just before I closed the zipper of my bag.
When my life started to depend and connected with all these people, I never was in this position ever.
Every question starts to pile up.
I slowly walked back until my leg touched my bed and made me sit down on the soft surfaces.
I never got close with anyone before, all people that ever were in my life mostly just like fleeting dreams. Each of them only comes and goes, most of them do not even have a distinct purpose. My brain and mind take me to the old days, to the distant past.
I can’t remember any of them. All of them just become shadows now, I can’t even recall their face nor their name.
This is not how I want my wake up to be, questioning myself again and again.
As if I’m not doing the same every single night.
In the end I just throw all that question away and stand up, take my bag and go out of my room, quickly before I make Daniel wait for me.
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I was standing alone in the almost deserted parking lot. Today it seems not many students come to campus for some reason. Despite today not even being a public holiday or any special kind of day, the campus is almost empty.
Maybe I am just not aware of campus activity, perhaps today they have something going on, it is just me that always keeps myself oblivion.
But I see some people still coming, I assume some normal class is still going normally like any other day. And I saw some sports club train in the field, so that is a great indicator I’m not alone in this massive place.
Daniel said I should wait for him at the parking lot, not sure why, but I followed it anyway. I see nobody here, except some gardener and campus officer walking here and there. Luckily this place has a good waiting bench and seat, even in the summer this kind of facility for students is definitely welcomed with open arms.
I snuck my hands inside my pocket feeling cold for waiting in this kind of weather. My breath created mist that was flying out from my mouth, clouding my glasses blocking my view. I let my view cloudier and clean again and again, letting the water particles play with my eyes.
Not long after I hear a sound from a loud machine that is getting closer and louder.
A sharp brake soon filled my ear and when the cloud view cleared up I saw someone on his black bike parking in the front of me.
His muscle tenses inside that black biker leather jacket. His hand reached to his own helmet and took it off, revealing a piercing face that I was way too familiar to see. His smile crooked, almost mocking me, what an annoying bastard.
Daniel throws another helmet to me which I catch mid-air. I quickly hug that white round thingy and inspect its plain colour and model.
“Been here waiting?”
“Damn right”
I position the helmet on my hip, I’m feeling like a grumpy widow every single morning.
His head moved and snapped to the other way, signalling me to hop on to his back seat. His bike is huge, I feel like his black R1 snicker at me. While I am standing there, Daniel is playing with the ignition as he seems lost and wants to get out of this place immediately.
I walk toward him, passing the metal bar that divided us, my heels clacking against the cold concrete deafening the silence. I shove back the helmet back at his hard chest.
“Dream on, I will not risk my life to be on that”
Daniel laughed at me ridiculously.
“Stop being a lion that is in a bad mood. Come hop on!”
His rough hand holding on to my arm, dragging me closer to him.
“No”
Daniel shakes his head.
“We don’t have all day, come closer let me help you”
His big hand that was covered with leather grabbed my face, and his other hand helped me put on the white helmet. The plastic surface slid slowly and gently with Daniel help, his finger traveling down and locked the safety belt.
He patted my helmet a couple of times.
“There you go, don’t want your head splattered on the concrete. Come on!”
Daniel ignites his machine once again, the masculine engine purring, as if it’s waiting for me to ride him. I walked closer and hesitated to climb on the back seat, and Daniel was still eyeing me from his rear window. In the end, I did not have many choices, I quickly climbed up and sat down awkwardly.
“I’m going to kill you if you ride this thing wildly”
I tried to muster as much as killer intent I have to warn Daniel. But the said person only laughed at my attempt.
“Oh I forgot something”
Daniel's head turns sideways, and I can see his eyes vaguely inside those dark glasses.
“What now!”
I grabbed a chunk of his leather fabric and yanked his body from the back.
“You better hold on to me real tight or else your weak limb will be laying on the ground”
I was dumbfounded for a while, pausing to try to make sense of his words.
And in an instant Daniels suddenly pulled his bike gas as strong as necessary, making the machine purring louder and giving me sudden force. I immediately scream and hold on to his body to my dear life while cursing at him. If you like to play with fire that much, I’ll show you fire.
But all I heard was his laugh.
He is having so much fun isn’t he?
Why does his action remind me of a certain person?
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We passed so many buildings and suburban houses, steadily the scenery kept changing as Daniel kept his bike speed in the same pace for a while now. My both hands holding on to his waist that warped by tattered black leather.
I keep looking right and left, studying the different types of building that we passed. The more we passed through the time, the type of the building kept changing and changing. The engine below me keeps on making a low groan, but I don’t mind the noise.
I see a great big wall with a bunch of gravity painted on the surfaces. I see a lake from the distance, I see a couple walking side by side on the road step.
The scenery keeps changing and changing.
And suddenly the view changed drastically. This place is still suburban, but it’s something different painted instead. The house here it’s not like the previous one we passed. Some are broken and tattered, some look like they have been abandoned for a long time.
When we passed the street name, my mouth silently read the words.
‘DownTown East’
Suddenly I recalled Daniel saying his living place is not ordinary one.
The vehicle stopped in front of white coloured house, it looked old but well kept. The grass at the front of the porch looks very tamed, like someone keeps it on check every week. Some part of the wall seems to have decayed and the paint looks cracked. Despite how clean the house looks, it also looks very old and damaged.
When the vehicle stops shaking and purring, I immediately jump off from the seat, take off my helmet and hit Daniel with it.
“I swear to god if you're going to drive like that again I’m going to kick you to death!”
But he didn’t faze, only a muffling laugh inside that helmet and jokingly protecting his body from my hit. With such ease he caught my next hit with one hand, while with his other hand he used to take off his helmet.
His laugh is still going on, but this time without his helmet, his playful voice playing directly to my ears. He lightly yanked the white helmet and I just let him be. I immediately slumped on the green grass in front of his house, feeling grateful I’m still loving after the whole ordeal of his driving skill.
“Can you? Can you really kick me without hurting yourself?”
His eyebrow rose, taunting me. His masculine and rough voice only agitated me more. So I stand up again, and this time I punch and kick him directly. But again, all he does is just sit down on his bike without moving, not even budge with my force, as if it's ticklish for him.
Daniel catches my hands mid-air with ease, smiling mockingly at me.
We keep playing like that while we both walk to his front door. I kept throwing fist and kicking which either he avoided easily or took the blow but nothing happened. He just let me hurt his body, if you can hurt him at all.
“Dam you! Dam you!”
My words are like a wind for him, because I can’t wipe that smile from his face and say sorry.
Daniel kept laughing and laughing, until suddenly his face twisted and changed into grim scowl. He grabs my hands hard, I can feel the hard pressure on my hands like he wants to snap it into two. I try to shake his grip but it won’t budge.
“Daniel… stop! It hurt!”
His eyes looked forward and passed me at the same time I heard a laugh from behind. Daniel pulled out a key and gave it to my hand that he strongly gripped. Placed me to his back, blocking my view from the person that is standing not far from the two of us, I can’t clearly see who is that. Every time I tried to take a peek, Daniel moved and covered me.
“Go inside…”
His voice turned cold and full of malice. But I shake my head not following him, feeling annoyed.
“No! what is wrong with you!”
And suddenly Daniel turned to my side, took the key open the door quickly, and yanked me inside. I feel down flat on the floor but before I can see and process what is happening, the door is already closed behind me.
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I can hear his mocking clap into my eardrum, his eyes and smile as rotten as ever.
“What a knight in shining armour…”
I stood there, not replying to him, ignoring but sending him a hard glare. Seeing my reaction even prompted him to smile mockingly at me.
“Is he your new toy, Daniel?”
He comes closer until we stand face to face at eye level.
“It’s none of your business, and scram off”
He whistled and put both of his hands inside his jeans pocket, rocking his body back and forth.
“Oh really, I believed that you living in my territory, and I believed that this is all my concern and business”
His pupil grows darker and dilated, and he brings his face closer to mine. That disgusting smile still plastered on his face, I want to rip off that smile and spit on it. All action he is made to just to taunt me and to make me flinch. Knowing him he will do anything to make that happen.
“I warn you, he has nothing to do with our business”
No matter how chill my tone is, he just stares at me smiling. His eyes peek behind me, staring at the door and coming back to me again.
“Say… is he good? With that face and body, I don’t mind to taste him too…”
And I snapped, I grabbed his collar and slammed him right to the hard wall. I let out growl right in the front of his face. My blood boiled I’m really close to snap his neck right here, right now.
But all he did was only groaning and laughing, a smile still not wiped from his face. I tighten my grip, and I can see from his face he starts having difficulty breathing.
“Listen to me, Kyle. If you dare to lay even one finger to him, I’ll make you pay, I’ll kill you…”
His laugh grows louder even in this state. And then his poisonous lips let out a menacing whisper.
“I bet he will let out a sweet moan…”
Just with that, all I see is red. I slammed his body to the ground, and immediately threw a couple of punches, blood started to come out from his face. My breath get getting quicker, and my chest felt hot and burning.
“Dan…! …Iel! Daniel….!”
My first stop mid-way and my vision starts getting clearer the moment I recognize that voice, that mumbling voice comes from behind the door. The door keeps pondering and pondering, and the louder it becomes, the more I come back to my senses. His voice is still ringing like a bell, the louder it becomes the more I see everything clearer.
I see a body below me, bloodied and wounded hard. But what irritated me, despite his face hanging to the back because I held on to his upper shirt, He keep the laugh and the smile still there and not gone.
“God… your punch still not changing…you not rusty at all… one more punch I’ll lose my conscious for sure”
I let go of his shirt and his body fell down to the ground. His body shaking with his laugh that comes out from his bloody mouth and bloody face. The more I listen to it the more I want to end the owner of the voice right away.
“Don’t show your face in the front of me again, you piece a shit”
I turn my body and walk toward the door, but his sudden voice makes me stop abruptly.
“Come back to us Daniel… we are your family…. Come on, let’s come back to old days”
I stop listening to him and leave him there rotten like what he is supposed to be. I keep on walking and open the door, which I greeted with a scowling face of a short boy in the front of me. His eyebrow knitted together, his eyes from the back of those clear glasses squinted hard toward me.
His both arms folded at the front of his chest. No matter how hard he try to look intimidating, he just ends up like a grumpy kindergarten. His lips open up but I can’t hear any words, but it seems he keeps yapping nonstop.
I just stood there smiling.
I’m glad you are safe.
This time around I won’t fail anyone, I have promised myself and him. I won’t let another soul go like him again ever.
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I kept yelling and yapping for I don’t know how long, but the person that was standing in front of me just stood there silent with mouth slightly open and eyes looking almost damped. I’m not sure if he can hear me or not, but I kept on pressing him, which resulted in nothing from him.
“Hey! Did you hear me?!”
My voice finally reached him, which prompted him to shake his head and give me his usual teasing smile. He just walked past me but before long I grabbed his jacket and forced him to halt on track.
“What was all that about? Answer me”
His back facing me, I can’t read his body and can’t read his face, but I felt a great distress emitting from him. Shortly after I hear a heavy sigh from him, and he turns to see me.
“There is nothing really… he was just really annoying old friends”
“Doesn’t look like that to me…”
I folded my arms, still waiting for his more logical explanation.
He threw his head to the back, inhaled a great amount of oxygen before facing me again, but this time he showed me a bored facial expression and tone. His eyes soften when he sees me, that depressing aura that is emitting from him depleted.
“Joshua… there is nothing to worry about, trust me. If anything let’s focus on our assignment”
His right hand try to reach me, but before it could touch my hair, I realized something. There is blood running from his palm, his knuckle looks busted. My whole face turns the moment that iron smell hits me.
“Daniel your hand!”
He realized something and retracted his bloody palm before I could touch it.
“Daniel are you okay?!”
Without answering me he went deeper into passing his living room to the back of the counter where he started the water faucet. The water soon turned red when it touched his bloodied hand. I can’t imagine how strong that is, but I see no change with Daniel's face.
“Daniel! What happened?!”
“It’s nothing…”
“I’m not blind!”
I try to help him, but before I can touch his hand, his other hand grabs me firmly.
“You have nothing to worry about… just sit down, I’ll be there”
“No!”
“Joshua… I’m okay, this is nothing, and I had worse. Please wait for me at my room”
He looked at me directly, his eyes softened with sadness glimmering inside. He try to smile but the more I see it the sadder he looks.
“Fine! Suit yourself!”
I walked out from him and went past the living room and kitchen, until I stopped in front of two doors. Both have the same white colour, but both have a distinct look. One full of stickers and ornaments, the most distinct one is the panel with name written on it.
‘Beowulf room, don’t come closer’
Beowulf?
Who is that? Such a mouthful name. But which one is Daniel’s room again? Should have asked him a moment ago. I guess my anger mixed with his rejection just bring the worst of me. But I shake my head and proceed to open the plain door without any sticker on it.
The moment I open the door, Daniel's body odor oozes through my nostril. I exhale my breath feeling grateful that this is a high chance in his room.
The wall is painted with mixed red and black, on each side. The chair, the table all placed in a way that looks much laid back and freestyle. The room looks tidy but still has a rough sense to it, like the owner not even trying to clean the entire room but still looks clean.
A classic guitar and electric guitar placed together in the corner of the room. There is one wardrobe in the middle of the room, but there are many clothes hanging onto the hanger beside it, I guess he used his wardrobe for different purposes.
There is a big bed placed across the wardrobe, but it looks very old. My eyes flickered with the light that spring into my eyes from the reflection of the mirror that stands beside the bed. His window curtain opens partly letting the sunshine go inside this room. I walk back till my foot hits a chair that is positioned neatly beside the study table with a PC on the top of it.
From the look of it, it is just a normal PC, from the model I see this PC only used for necessity and no more. My eyes shifted to the big speaker beside the table, it seems he likes to use it occasionally.
A white box caught my interest, the moment I found it I quickly went toward it and picked it up. Open it carefully and inspect the inside, this is a first aid kit. And before long I hear a foot step follow with a big body standing behind me.
I can feel all conflicted aura from him, but I refused to push him, it’s not my place to question his life at all. But perhaps the bigger part of me, the most egoistic one, just doesn't want to get caught between the crossfire.
I’m just a coward.
“Show me your wound…”
This time Daniel said nothing, but he showed me his wounded hand. By the look of it, it’s not pretty at all, as if he punched a wall hard and countless times.
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“Does it hurt?”
The whole time I tended his wound, I heard nothing from him, which made me even more worried. I feel like swimming inside the sea with land mines, which I don’t know whether I ever hit one or not.
“No…”
“I’m not surprised”
I laugh at him. Despite the look of the wound, if it’s me, I'm probably crying like a baby, but someone like him, in his calibre, this is probably child play. Why does every man that I know always seem stronger than me?
This is hurting my pride.
We sat down on his bed in silence. I don’t know what to say, and I don’t want to say anything but I'm still curious, and I can’t lie. But Daniel just keeps his mouth shut like he is trying to hold any plague.
“You have pretty tidy home”
I tried to sift the focus and topic somewhere else. Trying to forget what was happening.
“Hey, do you expect me to have such a dirty place to live?”
I scoff at him.
“Damn right”
His hand patted my head and shook it hard, I almost lost my balance.
“You little brat!”
We laugh together as if nothing ever happened. I patted his bandaged hands a couple of times, feeling sorry for myself and him for not able helping him more.
“Shall we start?”
I look up to his face with a smile, and he returns me with his mocking smile.
“Yeah, let’s not waste our time”
We both open our laptop and start focusing on the task at hand, the entire time we just focus and focus, nothing else. Even when we exchange words, it’s nothing but discussion and assignment, not much of chit chat. Time fly really fast, the moment we are finished with it, we realize the afternoon will soon come.
“I see nobody here…”
“My brother is out with his friends till night time”
Right, I remembered he said he has one younger brother.
“Where is your parent?”
“They are both passed away couple years ago”
I was stunned when I heard that answer, but Daniel didn’t faze.
“I… I’m sorry…”
“Nothing to sorry about, it’s stay in the past”
“But still, I really sorry to bring it up”
He nudged me with his big arm, and locked my neck with his arms.
“Stop being gloomy, sad face didn’t suit you”
“Arg! Let me go!”
I’m glad we were able to put everything aside and come back to our senses. Daniel is a lot scarier if he is not his usual self.
“You should go now”
I look at my phone screen and inspect the time.
“Well, I don’t mind, plus we are done with our assignment, but it’s too early, no?”
“That’s the whole point, before my brother come home”
I taken aback by his reply, raised my eyebrow together.
“Don’t get me wrong, he is very nosy, and difficult to deal with”
Before I can ask why, Daniel quickly explained his reason. And with that he is done preparing himself ready to help me go home.
The two souls ready themselves for the road drive, but before they leave the room the younger boy sees the glimpse of a family photo not far from Daniel's room. Woman and man smiling with two of their soon, Daniel looks so different there, he lot thinner and his brother only infant that holding by Daniel.
However, the same exact moment his eyes got blurry.
His vision changed into something else. He remembered the old man and a woman crying, the snowy falling and blurred his vision. The old man gave a wooden block with something written on it to the infant's hand. A voice started coming back to the boy.
“Please… be happy for me”
The tear, the deafening voice filled his head. And the headache came back to him.
“Joshua?”
The boy snapped back and quickly went after the man that was standing in the front of the door.