19 - Playing Some More

Gaming Center, Second Floor

Turns out a couple of wolf packs aren't a challenge for a trio of semi-pro players working together, and Sara finds herself falling in rhythm almost thoughtlessly as she supports Zach and Charles, filling the gaps in their near-perfect duo with easiness born from hundreds of hours of practice playing together.

'Another three. West,' Charles warns calmly, seemingly unbothered by the dozen or so wolves chasing after his PeaceSeeker.

Having already noticed the new threat, Sara moves to intercept them before they could close in on their archer, eliminating the first wolf by baiting its pounce and timing her attack as it lands defenselessly at SlashingWind's feet.

'So… You guys down for some chatting?'

'You know we're supposed to keep comms clear while fighting,' Zach points out, not without bitterness in his voice. 'What would Avril say? West side clear. Four more, east.'

As the wolf she was about to engage dies to an arrow mid-jump, Sara one hundred and eighties her character to cover their second flank, even as she sighs from the pettiness of her teammate.

'C'mon, you love talking! You're just upset because we ignored you earlier.'

'Unlike you, I desire certain standards to be met by my gameplay. Practice is practice. We'll talk as much as you want once we're in the clear.'

'But this isn't practice,' Sara points out as she rolls her character under a wolf's pounce. 'Technically, I'm not even a part of the team yet. By the way, how many arrows have you got still? Want me to grab some for you?'

'I've been grabbing them. And I have enough to last for a while, regardless. Now shut up, backstabber. Two, southeast.'

'She has a point,' Charles interjects, bouncing a wolf back by using his shield on the poor canine's face. 'Technically, this isn't practice.'

Zack groans. 'I'm surrounded by traitors. Fine, have it your way. My concentration is already broken, regardless.'

Praise where it is due, Sara has yet to see Zach miss, even as they pull monsters without stopping their mad run through the forest, constantly fighting against new waves of enemies.

Divine Arrow sounds about right, even if she won't ever admit it to the person themselves.

'What did you wish to discuss, Sara?' Charles asks, 'If it is about the team meeting regarding your readmittance, I'm afraid we know as little as you. I assume we'll simply vote? Avril told us to meet near the final boss, and little else. You know how she is.'

Sara bites her lip. 'Thanks for telling me. But no, that's not what I was going to ask. Actually, I was curious about Julius and Perla. Last I heard, they were ready to start playing for Innocent Whisps, but I noticed their names weren't in their player roster for this season. Did something happen?'

'Contract negotiations fell through last month. They really wanted to play together, but the team couldn't afford both of them after the season they had, and they ended up going with TID last minute. Their offer was simply better.'

'The Turtles? Shit, that's… good? Bad? IW is better, right?'

'Yes, and they'll have to move as well. Perla was pissed, but what can you do? They should be happy to be offered something in A league, considering the odds of becoming a full-fledged professional player nowadays. They'll be fine.'

'Like you're one to speak,' Zach interjects.

'What? Why? Something happened?'

'He has offers… As in, multiple of them,' Zach explains.

Sara blinks. 'But the year just begun? I thought they weren't allowed to scout until midterms.'

'They aren't allowed to offer me anything official, but there's nothing illegal about making themselves known, showing interest, or having a couple of conversations with potential players, granted they don't go too far. By the way, I'm ready to go. Follow on three.'

Charles bashes another wolf with his shield, dashes after it as it falls, and decapitates the canine before it can rise again. Then, now surrounded by his many pursuers, he has PeaceSeeker stand still for a moment, only to roll his character backward just as they're about to pounce him.

Sara is already running past him, even while arrows fly by her character, giving the now disorganized wolves no chance to breathe.

'And? What kind of offers did you get?' Sara pries as she weasels her character throughout the pack of wolves, leaving a trail of bodies in its wake.

'Above the Clouds and Companions of the Forest are the ones you'll probably be interested in.'

'ATC and CTF?! Are you kidding me?! Why are you still here?!'

Charles laughs in good humor. 'I still have a full year left, Sara. Even if I wanted to skip school and start earlier, they wouldn't take me. And besides…'

Charles's character gradually comes to a standstill beside Sara's as they inspect their surroundings, only to realize there are no more wolves to be seen.

Sara checks the dungeon's time, confirming there's still plenty of time left.

'Besides?'

'Besides, I'm not sure either of them is the right choice for me. Remember that foreign guy whose opposing team's audience triplicated after he trash-talked some of the Clouds' members? Their fanbase is insane, and not the good kind of insane. I'd rather not have my career end after a single mistake on stage… Honestly, playing with this amount of pressure would scare me.'

'Yeah, I remember. And I suppose I get it. But what about Forest? Didn't they also go pretty far into regionals last year?'

'They finished third,' Charles admits with some hesitation, 'But they want me as a second string for their main tank, HeavyChiken, so I don't know if or when I would even get to play a real match.'

'But you'd still participate in their scrims, right? And have a chance to learn from real professionals on a daily basis? I don't think it sounds like such a bad deal for you.'

'He's picky,' Zach interjects as his DivineArrow walks calmly amid slaughtered wolf corpses about to disappear to pick up what arrows he manages to find still intact. 'But he has a right to be. Offensive player like you and me, Sara? A credit a dozen. But a true, reliable tank who can keep his cool during matches and serve as a cornerstone for the team? There's a lot of value in that. Because you don't need just the skills, you need the right type of personality. Many seek to shine as the star of the show, but few are willing to do what needs to be done even if it means they'll soon be forgotten.'

'Is that why you decided to play as a tank, Charles? So you'd grow in value?'

'No. Zach thought it would be a good combination for his play style, and I agreed to it. Eventually, I realized I had a knack for it and began to enjoy it. I suppose I never put much thought into how it all started.'

Sara snickers. 'You better come up with something better than that for the interviews, unless you and your twin manage to end up in the same team as well.'

'I don't know. People seem to enjoy an honest approach rather than an embellished history most of the time. Do you not think so?'

'I see you haven't changed, Sara. Always pretending none of this concerns you, squirming around the edges of the team and feigning indifference. For how long do you plan to continue treating For Glory as a simple game? Strangely, you seem to love it as much as we do; I can see it in your eyes when you play. But in your current position, it is hard to say if any pro teams would ever consider contracting you even as a second-string.'

Before Sara manages to answer, Charles cuts in, 'She has potential.'

'Do you think I would waste my words if I thought she didn't?! Do you know how many people would kill for having half a chance at entering this place?! She was thrown in front of heaven's open gates, but still chooses to walk away from paradise! It pisses me off to watch it! And you, Charles, who knows damn well as I she's wasting her talent by not playing seriously, but is still unwilling to speak up about it, is a coward!'

Sara clears her throat. 'Hey, I'm still here, you know? And don't worry, I'm not walking away from anything. Not anymore.'

'If you say so.'

'Well… I do agree with Zach that you should consider focusing more on the team, Sara, if pursuing a career through the game is your goal.'

Sara sighs. She wishes she could explain she has always cared about the team, but that she simply didn't have much time or energy left for them given her circumstances… Still, she can't bring herself to ignore the fact she disappointed them many times before. Sara can't really blame Zach for not believing in her either.

'Thanks for worrying about me, Charles. And you too, Zach. Still, even after I left.'

'Shut up, idiot. It was obvious you would beg us to take you back sooner or later.'

'Fuck off! I was going through a hard time, all right?'

Sara chuckles, quickly wiping at a treacherous drop of sweat which most definitely was not a tear before forcing herself to focus on the game once more, lest Avril realizes they were wasting time chatting rather than running toward their object as they should.

'So, now what?' she asks, indicating the somber, snowy forest around, now devoided of enemies.

'We're close. The entrance shouldn't be far from here.'

'In that case, lead the way, oh mighty knight.'

***

Earth in Words Institute

Absently, Beatrice heads away from the Music Center, surrounded by well-cared-for vegetation as her mind wonders through the dreadful situation of her new reality.

What now?

What now?

What now?

Her thoughts spiral out of control, arriving nowhere, and all she can do to avoid a scream from bursting through is to put one foot ahead of the other and breathe deeply, never stopping for more than a moment at every intersection.

If only her steps could lead her to a new life. If only she could fix the past, or escape her broken future…

Abruptly, Beatrice stops, frozen in place by a terrifying thought.

'System, how many credits do I… How much do I own?!'

'Currently, Miss Swain's credits amount to: 81.654. Warning, unable to perform monthly due rent payment. Warning, monthly rent paying due in 2 days.'

"Eighty thousand…?" Beatrice murmurs, incredulous. But she… She made so much by helping Seijuro. She did enjoy spending her money rather than her father's whenever she could, but… but…

How could this… Most of her clothes are worth more than that, including her current outfit. Her violin is worth at least the triple, and a weekly rent of her apartment…

'Warning, unable to perform monthly due rent payment. Warning, monthly rent paying due in 2 days.'

Beatrice laughs, her voice cracking in suppressed rage even as blistering tears of frustration run through her cheeks.

It's real, isn't it? Her father has gone and done it. She's disowned now. Beatrice. Just a nobody, like the rest of them, may they choke in their mockery.

Beatrice. Not Swain. Just Beatrice. Only chaos, no beauty.

What now?

What now?

What now?

What now?

What now?

What now?

What now?

An urging will to scream at the top of her lungs strikes Beatrice as she bites her lip, strongly, in order to stop herself from doing so.

"Are you sure about skipping? Because I can't take another deduction."

"You'll be fine! I'll come up with something."

"Will you really? Because last time-"

Beatrice widens her eyes, conscious of the fact she has been crying for a while now. What if they ask why she is here? What if it is written all over her face now, how much of a failure she is?

Unable to bear the thought, Beatrice hastily wanders off the trail, blending among the trees as she runs away from the voices' source.

What is wrong with you!?

As Beatrice runs, her face burns, and her stomach aches. Still, she continues on running until the voices have faded into the distance, and some more still.

Why can't you just be normal?!

Once her legs are no longer able to carry her forward, Beatrice drops her case and rests her forehead against the closest tree. Her sweat is cold against her skin.

Everyone is tired of your shit.

'Dangerous levels of user distress detected. Warning, no immediate emergency contact selected. Suggestion: A cup of water. Deep breaths.'

Shut up.

Why are you such an embarrassment?! I wish you'd disappear already!

Shut up!

Beatrice bites into her arm and screams, muffling her own voice as she doubles over herself and allows her anger and frustration to take over.

Cursed be them all! She doesn't need anyone! She doesn't need her stupid family! And she doesn't need their stupid money! She doesn't need her sister or her stupid approval! She'll make do without any of it, and she'll prove she has always been better than any of them!

Panting, Beatrice quickly inspects her arm, relieved to find the bite wasn't strong enough to break the skin. Gods know what sort of excuse she'd have had to come up with in order to get it fixed.

Beatrice laughs as she glances toward her dropped case.

Excuses. Simple problems. Yes, she should focus on solving solvable things first. One at a time.

Her apartment… It's obvious she'll have to move, either to the school's dormitories or to somewhere much, much cheaper.

Even if the image of her things being dragged out fills Beatrice's body with unbearable rage. Madness.

Speaking of which, she'll probably have to sell most of them anyway. Both to sustain herself and because she'll most likely not have enough space for them once she moves…

In practice, she'll have to find somebody willing to take the apartment with most things still in it. It's the only way she'll make anything out of them in a reasonable time frame.

But not her clothes. She can't bear the thought of giving away her clothes for any number of credits.

She'll probably be able to transfer the contract as long she finds someone willing. They'll take over the rent, and give her some money for her things, which she'll then use to find a cheaper place.

Beatrice sighs as she crouches to grab her case. The sound of running water is perceivable nearby, now that her thoughts aren't so unbearably loud, and she decides to head toward it.

…There's no way she'll share a room with anybody, so dormitories are out of the question. Meaning, she might have to find a part-time job after school, granted Seijuro doesn't find enough enemies to feed her.

Few still challenge her rule these days, Prince Uren excepted.

Maybe she could go back to selling to others, like before?

But… Seijuro forbade her. Exclusivity was a part of their agreement.

Part-time job it is, then. Something related to playing, perhaps?

A soft morning breeze blows against her hair, and Beatrice finds herself wiping at her still-wet face as she enters a clearing where a small, artificial waterfall constantly falls toward the calm waters of a small lake.

The school had a place like this? It reminds her of a particular spot in her mother's garden, enough so she wonders if it was created by the same designer. Given her mother has worked with most of the city's garden designers at one point or another, the idea doesn't seem too far-fetched.

It's calming, Beatrice decides, as she watches the occasional falling leaf and the ones currently on the water. She feels as though she has entered a place where time is a strange concept, and nothing could truly hurt her.

It reminds her of something else, besides her mother's garden. Well, her mother's garden has always reminded her of that person in the first place.

"Seijuro…"

'Set immediate emergency contact as, User: Seijuro Aston?'

Beatrice blinks. What? She can do that? They do share a link, but…

'Immediate emergency contact set to, User: Seijuro Aston. Initiating connection.'

"What?! No-!"

'Beatrice? Did you just set me as your emergency contact?'

Beatrice freezes as her gaze desperately wanders through the calm clearing in search of some sort of excuse for the odd malfunction, coming up empty.

It is a near-perfect system. It has never ignored her wishes before.

'You know I'm in the middle of class, right? And that I can't refuse the connection if you do that? Beatrice?'

'Y-yes, I knew… I'm sorry, but can I talk with you for a sec?'

Beatrice hears a mental sigh through the connection.

'Fine, you have two minutes. What's so important it can't wait two hours until our break?'

Beatrice's mind goes blank. Something to tell? A reason? How would she know any of those things when the call was purely an accident?! Her deceiving skills, which Beatrice has always been proud of, seem to have suddenly decided to take a vacation.

'…You don't actually have something to tell me, do you?' Seijuro asks plainly.

'No, wait! I do! I was just working on how to phrase it! It's about, err… The project we were working on. You know, the one we talked about yesterday.'

Beatrice bites her lower lip as she stares into the calm waters of the artificial lake.

'Sure. What about it?'

'You think it's enough? Or should I continue to… Improve upon the design?'

'You're the professional. You tell me.'

'I saw you did your part this morning. By the way, a warning would've been nice, since we're working together and all… But I was impressed! Everything you do is impressive! No, I mean…'

'It was something I thought of after our talk last night. Somewhat of a whim, I suppose. I wasn't sure how well it was going to work, since I'm not used to being this direct. What did you think of my acting? Convincing enough?'

'It was for me! I was so angry at first, until, you know… I connected the dots and realized what you were doing… And then I also realized you could've done it without me in the first place. Everything. And the result would still have… S-still have been the same, wouldn't it? No, actually, you probably could do a better job than me…'

Her voice cracks, a sob escapes through, and Beatrice realizes then her family isn't the only thing weighing on her mind. She was supposed to be one in the shadows, doing the dirty work. If Seijuro can do that part too, then she doesn't need Beatrice. And if Seijuro doesn't need her, then what use is she for? What is the point of everything she has gone through?

'Oh, Gods, Beatrice, are you crying because I interfered without warning you? Seriously? By everything that's sacred…' Seijuro sighs. 'Fine, I guess we're doing this. Do you remember what I told the first time we met?'

'…T-that if I continued to spread untrue rumors about you, you would make me wish I was expelled before the end of the week?'

Seijuro laughs. 'No, after that, you idiot. You had this look on your face as if you just met your idol. And then you broke down crying, apologizing for everything you had done. Do you remember what you told me?'

Beatrice feels her cheeks heating under their wetness, even as they're brushed by another cold morning breeze.

'I said I was jealous. That everything you did was perfect, and it wasn't fair… And, t-that… I just wanted you to look at me, even if it meant… Even if it meant becoming your enemy.'

'That's right. And what did I tell you in response?'

'That everybody has their place. That being perfect is your burden, and being a jealous brat is my privilege. But that if… If I was so insistent on overstepping, then I should at least make myself useful. To you, and the country.'

'Yes. Do you think you have been of use to me, Beatrice?'

'I… I hope so? I thought so…'

'Beatrice, do you think a queen has the time to clean every restroom in her country?'

'Err… No? I mean, why would even she-'

'Shut up, let me finish. My point is that, even if she could, perhaps, accomplish a better job at cleaning restrooms than many of the people assigned for the job, she's even better at doing other things, things they can't, or won't. Do you understand me?'

'I… I think I do? You're saying… I'm your restroom cleaner?'

'No, you fucking idiot, I'm saying you're useful to me. And that's not going to change anytime soon, because I'm only one me. I can't do everything, even if I had a hundred times the number of hours than the rest of you.'

Beatrice blinks. Useful. She? To Seijuro?

'You could replace me any time.'

'Stupid. You do a good job. Why would I go through the trouble? Now, repeat after me: I'm a useful asset to Seijuro Aston and Elysium.'

'I'm… A useful asset to Seijuro Aston and Elysium.'

'Again. Make me believe you understood me.'

Beatrice intakes a shaky breath, raising her head slightly.

'I am a useful asset to Seijuro motherfucking Aston, and by such, Elysium!'

'So you do understand. Good. Now answer me what I asked you earlier. Do you think it has been enough?'

'To crush his reputation? Not yet, no, at least not if you want the damage to be permanent.'

'Not permanent, no. Only for a couple of months, or maybe a year or so.'

'In that case, he's in his last straw. I doubt many people are still willing to talk to him, but since he's so new here, some might still give him the benefit of the doubt. For what you want, I'd suggest something more decisive… But, you know, not bad enough that it would destroy his image forever.'

'Got it. See? Useful. And since this matter happens to be somewhat personal, you can leave it to me from now on. Just this once, all right? I'll think of something. And don't worry, I'll still pay you the full price. You did a good job with the video.'

Personal? For Seijuro? Does she dare ask?

'T-thank you. And, you know, about the money… I…'

'Yes?'

'No… n-never mind.'

'Is that what the connection was actually about?'

Damn it. Why is she so insightful?

'You know, actually, weren't you in a hurry? Maybe we should talk later.'

'You interrupted me in the middle of a spar. But it doesn't matter anymore. Just spit it out already. What is this about money? Do you want more of it?'

'Wait! Before that, why does the spar not matter anymore?'

'…My sparring partner happened to suffer an unfortunate accident after he ignored my notice for time and attempted to take advantage of my distraction. So, the spar doesn't matter anymore, since he's being taken to the infirmary now.'

Beatrice feels her jaw slacking.

'And this happened… During the connection? While you were giving that whole speech about restrooms and queens?'

'Well, technically, it happened when I told you you had two minutes. He was already being hovered away during the speech. I fucked up. Satisfied? Now don't think I haven't realized you are trying to change the subject.'

Beatrice finds herself smiling. Amazing. Just… Amazing. And the crazy thing? Beatrice has learned to expect nothing less from her princess.

'Okay, okay, I'll tell you! Just don't send me to the infirmary if I touch your arm when you're distracted, yeah?'

'You brat. Shouldn't you be focusing on your class? I heard Advanced MA can be pretty brutal.'

'I… We're on break.'

'Liar.'

'You know what?! You'd know I flunked MA if you read my messages! I have time because I was expelled from class today for playing badly! In normal MA!'

Realizing her outburst, Beatrice widens her eyes as she covers her own mouth. Needless to say, the action amounts to nothing, given she wasn't using her mouth to speak in the first place, and she finds herself staring at the beautiful, peaceful clearing with only her breathing as company for several seconds of silence until Seijuro speaks again.

'Sorry, I had to leave that place. What did you say? You flunked last semester? And you were expelled from class today?'

Beatrice releases a small sigh of relief.

'T-technically, I left on my own… But it was obvious I was ruining it for everybody.'

'Really? Are you sure?'

'Yes! Everybody knows I've no talent! Literally no one was surprised when I flunked! Even Melinda knew about it, and she just shrugged, as if it was expected!'

Admitting it out loud, even in thought, seems to take something out of Beatrice. Releasing a deep breath, she blinks away her blurry vision and puts her violin case to a practical use for once by carefully sitting atop it as she stares into the trees above and the partially hidden sky beyond their branches.

'So, now you know I'm a failure. Please, say something.'

'…Well, I was surprised. I know nothing about talent for music, but I've always enjoyed hearing the melodies you compose. You showed them to your teacher, right? Or to somebody else with knowledge on the field?'

No. No, she didn't. She was too afraid and embarrassed to. It is true Seijuro almost always praised them, but Beatrice thought she was doing her princess thing and…

'You didn't, did you? You idiot. If you spent all of your time composing those melodies, then didn't show them to anybody, of course they think you have no talent!'

'You r-really think so? Aren't you saying this just to make me feel better?'

'Fine, I'll tell you what. Meet me today after class, and we'll show your work to a couple of teachers. I can't promise anything, but maybe they'll reconsider flunking you. It might not be too late to get you into AMA this year… If you want to, of course.'

Beatrice can scarcely believe her hearing.

'You… You'd really do that for me?'

'Sure. Why not? It won't cost me much. But in return, you have to promise me you'll not flunk again, since I'm putting my reputation on the line for you.'

Swallowing with difficulty, Beatrice struggles for several seconds to put her thoughts into words.

'O-okay, I promise I'll do my best… But what if they don't like my music?'

'I know how much you love playing, and I know how much work you put into your songs. If they don't like it, then I suppose I'll look like a fool, and you'll stay flunked. Wouldn't you rather have tried?'

'Seijuro… Thank you for doing this for me. Truly. I thought… I thought you didn't care about me.'

'Err… See you after class, I guess?'

'Wait, there's something else-'

'Sorry, but we'll have to talk about your money problems some other time, okay? I suspect I can only handle one Beatrice disaster at once.'

'Oh… Okay then. See you.'

Well… The whole school will probably find out about it sooner or later, given how rumors tend to work here.

'Bye.'

'Bye.'

The connection ends, once more leaving Beatrice to her own thoughts as she stares at her surroundings in astonishment.

That was… Well…

…Now what?