I love you

Ty bursted into loud laughter, his face lighting up, his eyes twinkling, his dentition beautiful and welcomed.

God I loved seeing him like that! All happy and boyish and free…

"Hell no. You should have seen him. He looked like… hell I don't even know what he looked like in that suit but he wasn't pretty."

"There's no arguing that one." I adjusted my right leg that had been resting on his left one, then I propped myself up on the car seat. Electric current ran through my body as Tyler's hand innocently rubbed my leg.

Thank God I was wearing pants today.

With one silent sigh, I pushed the thought of Tyler's hand caressing my leg away. "Question. Do you think you'd look good in a tux?"

Tyler smiled smugly. "Have you seen me?"

I bursted out laughing. "Damn! You think you're that pretty?"

"Oh I don't think I'm pretty. I know I am." His grin was filled with overconfidence.

"Wow. Talk about prideful with an ego. You probably think everything looks good on you."

With another smug smile playing on his lips, he bit his lower lip almost painfully and I almost melted.

Tyler was beautiful. Long lashes, long legs. Pretty on some days and handsome on others. This was no exaggeration; he had the body of an athlete. And his hair, long black thick hair he always braided. The boy was too fine to be real. And he knew it. I was very sure he capitalized on it too. But I wasn't going to give him the satisfaction of knowing that I thought he was the most beautiful man that ever lived.

"You are such a narcissist." I said blushing.

"Whatever you say."

We continued to talk about celebrities who looked like shit in their tux. Just as we decided to look up celebrities who looked horrible in dresses, Tyler's phone rang.

I busied myself with my phone as he conversed with his dad, forcing my ears to close shut which was basically impossible since we were just inches apart.

"…yeah… Of course not... Will do… Okay… Bye."

"Sorry about that, my dad was simply being the pain he's always been."

Because I didn't know how to reply to that, I simply nodded and looked outside my window. Thoughts of my dad came like a whirlwind, but i pushed them aside and focused on my window. I gotta admit, it was a beautiful night to be outside.

"By the way," Tyler spoke again, "you said you had something to tell me. What's up?"

I'd decided to tell Tyler about Andrew staying with me because I thought about it and I'd hate to be in a situation where he found out on his own. But that wasn't all I had decided to tell Tyler about.

Andrew had warned me that telling Tyler was a bad idea, but I had stubbornly called Ty up and asked to meet. Now I was beginning to doubt if I'd thought this through. If this was the okay thing to do.

"What's up? Did something happen?" Ty looked curious and a bit concerned.

In the last three days all I could think about was ways to gently break the news to him. Now? Now I couldn't even bring myself to tell him Andrew was staying at my house. The same house I'd forbidden him from entering many times.

"Uhm…" I smiled, deciding against telling him. At least until I figure out what exactly to say to him. "Nothing Ty. Everything is perfect."

"You missed me didn't you? That's what you called me out."

I scoffed and sighed, an exasperated expression I didn't mean plastered on my face.

He stared at me for a while, a smile playing on his lips, his head now reclined on his seat.

"You have such beautiful eyes."

I blushed.

I was still in recovery when Tyler sat up abruptly and lightly placed a kiss on my lips, and stayed there. I kissed him back, liking our proximity.

The tingling sensation I was feeling at that moment was new and different. I knew what it meant, why I was having it, but I wasn't ready. Not yet. So I relaxed in our kiss, immersed and so distracted by it that I hadn't realized Tyler's hands had moved to my waist.

It was nothing to worry about at first, until he began to caress me.

Nervous. The butterflies in my stomach dissolved and all I felt was nerves. I tried to control it. Tried to relax and enjoy the moment, tried to go back to the place I'd been before his hasty hand movement, but Tyler's grip tightened a little and I could have sworn I heard a small moan escape his lips. That pushed me off the edge.

"Tyler." I pulled back, panting. I was almost out of breath.

"Oh my God, Sophie. I'm so sorry. Did I hurt you? God!"

The second guilt took over his face, I calmed. I wasn't even sure I was angry before. Whatever I was feeling before just dissipated.

"Hey. It's okay." I tried to console him.

He pulled back, creating more space than necessary between us. "No. No it's not. I shouldn't have… i am so

Sorry."

"Ty…" I took his right hand. He tried to pull it away but I held it firmly. "Listen to me. It happens."

I didn't even know if what I was saying was the truth. Actually, it didn't matter if it was all lies. The most important thing was getting Tyler to stop feeling guilty about what happened.

His hand found my cheeks and he rubbed gently and lightly.

"I hate myself." His eyes watered a little and shook. I could see the great restraint in his eyes.

"I said it was fine."

"Not just for this, for taking so long to ask you out. You're so beautiful. Inside and out. I feel so lucky to have you. I love you."

I froze. And so did he. But immediately he unfroze and smiled. "I do. I love you."

"Tyler…" I could feel the stiffness on my face. I could feel the world turning. I could feel my insides threatening to burst. I could feel my heart pounding too loudly.

"You don't love me, or you're not sure? It's fine." He didn't stop smiling. "You don't have to say it because I'm saying it. You can take all the time you need. C'mon Sophie, relax. You look like I just told you I'd murdered someone." Tyler managed to chuckle in our situation, but I couldn't find it in myself to. Relaxing my face was still a problem.

"Sophie," our eyes locked despite my desperate attempts to look elsewhere, "do I look like a petty guy to you? Cause i think only petty people get mad in situations like this."

I managed to shake my head but I still couldn't say what I had in mind.

"I'm not gonna force you into saying what you're not comfortable with." Tyler's eyes held only kindness. Holding back my tears was getting harder.

"Meet me at your pace." He smiled.

A lot of things had come to my mind to ask. Why do you like me so much? Why aren't you mad that I couldn't say three simple words back to you? Why are you being so understanding?

"When did you become such a grown up?" Was what came out of my mouth instead.

Tyler took my hand in his and smiled brightly, and then seconds later he started laughing.

I thought I could laugh too. No. I wanted to laugh so badly. The situation was awkward and stiff. It was very uncomfortable for me. I'd said that to lighten the mood. And yet, I couldn't bring myself to laugh with him.

"You really mean it? Everything you've just said?" Again, I found words I hadn't given permission, come out of my mouth.

"I do." There was no hesitation in his voice. " Say it when you're comfortable. When you're ready. And if you never feel it," he shrugged playfully, his African American accent more pronounced now "then shawty, I'm cool with whatevs. It will sting like hell, but it's all cool." He chuckled.

I finally laughed. And with every soft sound that came out of my mouth I felt a little less awkward. A little less horrible…

"I still ain't putting out though. You cool with that too?" I tried to mimic the thick accent Ty had used earlier but found myself laughing at how weird it had sounded.

Instead of laughing at me, Tyler said with a serious expression, "I'm willing to wait. Cause you worth it."