Chapter 69
Beautiful sunshine wakes me flooding through the window, I feel the warmth on my face. The children must be awake and with Sakura as they are not in the room. Lori is opening the curtains saying "wakey wakey sleepy head". I sit up and check the time, it's 9:30am. "Morning!" I say with a croaky voice. I take a mouthful of the tea she has put by the side of my bed. She really knows how to look after me.
She comes and sits by me and asks if i'm ok. I nod, and then remember that I haven't updated her on the latest. We put off the conversation yesterday because of little ears. I tell her what was said between us in the bedroom, how I held my nerve and stayed in control to a point, feeling a little rage when mentioning STI's. We discussed the overheard conversation between him and Jimin and then our brief time in the kitchen. "So how has all that made you feel?" She asks.
"I do believe he regrets it, and I don't think he would lie about not feeling mentally well at the moment. Honestly I want to throw my arms around him and tell him it's all going to be ok, but I don't want him to think i'm a push over so I am going to hold back a bit. Did he apologise to Yoongi like he told Jimin?"
"Yoongs mentioned they had talked but didn't really go into detail about what they said, but i'm sure he will tell you if you ask" she says. I pull the covers off of me and get up. I take another swig of my tea and say "I need to go and work out. I think running with my music on might help me focus my thoughts and feelings. Fancy it?" She shakes her head. "Oh yeah I forgot, you don't need exercise to have a hot body! It all comes naturally to you lucky cow". I laugh.
"I am going to prep for the party later, I need to wax, I want to paint my nails and toe nails and do a face mask. Oh, the boys have organised for 2 ladies to come later to do our hair and make up. Do you know what you are wearing yet?" She asks intrigued at what my choice might be. "I had something in mind, but I think I might go in another direction now. I will come and show you after my work out".
I head into mine and Joons room to pop on some workout clothes, and Lori heads off to her room for her pamper session. I will shower after I have worked up a sweat, but I brush my teeth as last nights pizza has my mouth feeling furry. Thankfully Namjoon isn't in there so we don't have to have another awkward interaction. I change, grab my air pods and head down to the gym.
When I arrive Jungkook and Namjoon are both in there. Maybe they both need to throw themselves into a work out to focus too. They seem quite relaxed with each other, so hopefully they have worked out any issues they had from the last couple of days. "Morning" I say being politely but not overly so. I grab a towel and a bottle of water and head to the treadmill. Jungkook says good morning and carries on hitting the heavy bag and Namjoon comes over to me and says "hey, how did you sleep?"
"Like a baby" I answer. He looks at the floor and fiddles with the edge of the towel he has around his neck looking slightly uncomfortable or upset, I'm not sure which it is. "I slept really badly, I missed you. It's not the same not having you to cuddle up too" he says finally looking up at me with hope on his face for a soft response. If I tell him I missed him too I might look weak, but if I say something back that is harsh I won't be helping him to feel good about our relationship or himself. I don't want to carry on being a bitch, his little face looks so sad I can't stand it. "I know what you mean, I felt like that the night before".
I think I have managed to be understanding but also to reiterate that this is not my doing but in a subtle way. He puts his hand on to mine and I don't move away. He strokes it with his thumb and it feels so nice. "Will you come back to our room tonight? I'm not expecting anything to happen, but I would like to be close to you" he asks. I turn the treadmill on and start to walk, I smile at him and say "we are out in public tonight, we are going to have to be tactile and look like a couple if we don't want loads of press questions, don't get that confused with me being ok with everything. If I am not too overwhelmed then maybe, but I am not promising anything". I move my hand and turn the treadmill up, put in my air pods and press play on my prodigy playlist. He smiles and nods and goes back to his workout. I think that interaction may have made him happy.