4 Rude Awakening

Groggily, I dragged my head off of the pillow and into the air.

Actually, never mind. My discombobulated brain defaulted to what usually happens when I wake up once every few days; in reality, I shot up out of whoever's blanket was covering me - since I know I don't own one - as if I was hit by a bolt of lightning..

My eyes flew open, rapidly glancing around the room like a cornered wild animal, seeing a woman raise her hand away from my diaphragm. Apparently, she wasn't the only stranger that day who planned to confuse and daze me, because a man in a suit next to her brought his finger towards my forehead, where he subsequently flicked me.

This time, instead of jumping into an upright position from the sudden sensation, I hurtled into the mattress of the bed like an artillery shell - and, while there wasn't an explosion, I heard a large crack from the frame of the bed.

"Wait for a minute or two. He should be fine by then."

'Fine'? I had to lean over and vomit all over the floor right after whatever witchcraft that was. What exactly does he mean by 'fine'? Able to function without dying?

"Okay. It's been long enough. Get up." The impeccably dressed man began snapping his fingers in front of my eyes. "Griselda, give me Alessandro's water." After that, he splashed water all over my face. "I don't have all day." Next, he grabbed me by my shoulders and began shaking me like a ragdoll.

All I could do was mutter unintelligible curses.

He stopped harassing me after a minute or so, letting me come to my senses, and I did. I hate to admit it, but all that he did definitely did speed up the process.

But I doubt this man is a medically qualified practitioner, or even a doctor at all. Was that Chinese witchcraft? Or maybe Indian. I can't differentiate between the various pagan heresies performed by their sinners.

"Okay, let's go quick. What is your name?" he said, bringing out a notepad and pen.

"What's yours? Why do you want to kn-"

He smacked me on top of the head for that.

"I ask the questions. Stop wasting time. What is your name?"

I should've thought everything through before opening my mouth. I deserved that, even if it's only because I was just touched and infected by heretical hands.

Oh. Never mind. The suited man is wearing a rosary and the girl is dressed in a nun outfit.

Anyway, back to the immediate issue. It'd be better to not antagonize my potential capturer, and if they wanted to kill me, they'd have done it by now.

I heard them mention Alessandro's name, so it looks like that kidnapping theory I had was true. The explosion and all that were probably hallucinations from all the drugs they pumped into me when my guard was down. Or maybe not. At this point, I can't be sure of anything.

"Ioann." [1]

"You know how many Ioanns there are in this world? Millions. [2] Give me your full name." Impatiently, he tapped the notepad with his pen.

He's not wrong.

"Ioann Maksymovich Ivanov."

He stared at me with a frustrated expression. "...You're serious?"

"Yes. Why?"

"How are we supposed to determine anything from that? It's basically John Smith in Russian form."

Is he Polish? He's incredibly barbaric and uncivilized, no matter how much his fancy clothes try to convince me otherwise.

My father used to call such people 'Slobodans'. I don't know why, but it was funny to me as a child.

"Anyway," he tapped the notepad again, "how much do you eat per day?"

"I don't eat on a per day basis. I eat once every few days to a week."

"...What?" He gave me a once-over. "You're over two meters tall. When we threw you in an older, smaller bed, it cracked under your weight. Your assailant here," he jabbed the pen at the girl next to him, "had to use Mana to pick you up. And you're telling me you eat as often as a cat? You should be about as skinny - or dead - as the average Soviet if you're telling the truth."

Why'd he call her my assailant? And yes, I know that my biology is special in some ways. Now that I'm looking back, Alessandro's reaction to me being able to see in my kitchen might've been justified. I thought my vision was normal, considering that I never compared it with anyone, and the duo with me could see just fine.

It's no surprise, however. I've always known that I was gifted to be superior to everyone else by the Lord's will.

But uncivilized philistines like him never react well to such obvious truths, so I merely gave him a shrug.

He looked up to the ceiling and sighed.

"Fine. When did you awaken your Sacred Gear?"

"Sacred Gear?"

He looked frustrated again, but this time, instead of directing it towards me, he stared at Alessandro, who I knew was in the room but didn't notice where at. Strangely enough, Alessandro was in a bed identical to mine.

"Alessandro. Care to explain?"

He looked offended at that. "I have nothing more to explain. Cael should've told you all what happened. I only woke up recently myself."

"Well, feel free to enlighten me, then." He spread his arms. "I'm afraid I wasn't deemed worthy to be privy to such important information."

Alessandro sighed. "We ran out of time when we had just begun telling him everything."

The man began moving his pen in a back-and-forth motion, as if trying to say 'move it along'.

"And…?"

"I can't."

"What do you mean you can't?"

The girl stepped in, still looking down at her feet. "...He got a visit from His Eminence Abercio. It probably has something to do with that."

Looks like I'm important. Or controversial, at the very least. She put a lot of emphasis on this Abercio's name and even used 'His Eminence', implying that he's of high status; if the top dog himself came around to deal with matters concerning me, it means I'm considered important in some way.

Whether I'm important in a good or bad way has yet to be determined, but I'm leaning towards the former; I'm still alive, after all.

The man scratched his head. "Oh. No wonder. Were you there?"

"I was asked to step out of the room."

"And I'm assuming you didn't eavesdrop?"

She scoffed. "I'm not that dumb."

"Sure. Anyway, back to him." He turned to me. "Do you have a special ability or trait that no one you know has?"

Yes. It's just that I don't have anything much to say about it.

"Gloves."

That is genuinely the most I can tell him. I was planning to hide as much information about the thing as I could, but then I realized that I had no information to hide in the first place. It's not like I'm hoarding away any information; I told him everything I know that isn't unlikely speculation.

"...Sure. When did you discover this?"

I notice that he's not prying as much now. Looks like 'Abercio' isn't someone to be messed around with.

"Between the ages of seven and twelve."

Again, he smacked me on the head, but this time, it felt like a cannonball; the adrenaline from my 'rude awakening' had worn off, and all that was left was an agonizing ache. "Don't be smart with me. I've wasted enough time on you already. Be specific."

I guess there are limits on what I can get away with. Fairly obvious conclusion, but I wanted to see what that limit was, and I've figured it out: Don't be insolent.

"To the best of my memory," I murmured, trying my hardest to recall such old memories with my still dazed mind, "it was at the age of ten."

"Late bloomer. Not by too long though." He scribbled a bit more on his notepad. "Did anything major happen in your life around that time? More specifically, some sort of traumatic experience?"

Well, yes. It wasn't really traumatic though. I actually quite enjoyed it.

"My father died."

"Hm." He wrote some more. "Pretty standard stuff. This is good enough for now. I'd recommend that you get Alessandro - and Griselda, I suppose, as she's here - to finish the talk you were having yesterday. You'll be summoned in around… thirty minutes, and not knowing even the basics will make everything seem nonsensical. And no questions," he said, seeing that I was about to open my mouth, "you'll understand what I mean later."

I have a feeling that I'll be hearing that phrase a lot in the future.

"Any objections?" He looked at the other two he mentioned. "Okay. Griselda, you should tell him," he pointed at me, "what happened. Oh, and you owe me a favor. But you already knew that."

"Sure, Jacques. Sorry." Alessandro shrugged..

"Griselda owes me a favor. Not you. But nice seeing you. Good luck finding a new arm or at least learning to deal with it. I'd recommend you visit old man Calliope; he should have some advice to share with you."

New arm? And the man's name is Jacques, allegedly, so that might mean he's French. Or I'm misunderstanding them and they're actually saying 'Jack', in which case, all bets are off.

"Yeah…" Alessandro seemed to sober up, looking down at his armless shoulder.

Looks like I did that. I'm not sure if I should consider myself to be powerful or weak; on one hand, I demolished an area the size of a small village, and on the other, I couldn't kill one person not even a meter away from me. It sounds like Cael survived as well, so make that two.

Jacques waved to us while leaving. "Good luck in general, to all of you."

Thus leaving me in a room with a man I had crippled and a woman who had supposedly assaulted me. It's a good thing I don't care about awkwardness; why should I feel anxious amongst scum lower than me? Why should I let their unimportant attitude affect my own mindset and actions?

They're not important to me whatsoever.

What's important is that I get some questions answered.

"What were you two doing to me as I woke up?" I switched my focus to the girl.

"...All I did was jolt you awake with a mediocre pulse of Mana. Jacques did the actual Magic."

I turned towards Alessandro for an answer right after, because hers told me nothing of value.

"It's a medical practice," he explained. "After a patient's head wound is treated, they'd be in a discombobulated state for days or even weeks, so, if the patient is considered to be valuable enough, our doctors are trained to rejuvenate them… it's just that barely anyone can do it. We have around five people who can; Jacques is one of them. We were thanking him because doing that procedure takes up a lot of Mana, and for that reason, Griselda offered to do the first part: waking them up and slightly energizing them with a jolt of Mana. I'm not a doctor, so I'm not privy to the secrets of the Magical Medicine field, but the actual procedure most likely involves stimulating the brain with Mana, which is probably why so few can do it; it needs an ungodly amount of control to not harm the patient."

For someone claiming to not know their secrets, he knows an unnecessary amount of information.

"Interesting." So it wasn't a hidden attempt of brainwashing, hypnosis, or a failed attack. "Can you tell me 'what happened', Mrs. Assailant?" I asked, looking at the girl.

I certainly want to know her slight against me. I always make sure to keep things like that in mind.

For some reason, she seemed to be angry towards me. "Well, you see, I saw Alessandro looking like he'd just come back from a fight with a High-Class, of all things! So, since I knew that you had caused it, I punched you in the back of the head." She clapped. "It's that simple. You can't blame me, just look at what you did to him!"

High-Class? Fight? Is Alessandro a boxer? I thought he was a priest.

"Griselda," Alessandro said, "you forgot to mention how you cracked his skull and nearly killed him."

"Okay?"

What a flippant attitude towards my attempted murder.

Well then. I'll be sure to remember that, as well as the fact that she seems to be very protective of and subservient to Alessandro, given how she couldn't meet his eyes when he spoke. Maybe she's his wife?

"Good to know," I responded.

No need to let her know that the hate is mutual. She's hiding it, and even I can't tell just by looking at her, but, given how she acts like a lover or best friend to Alessandro and considering the fact that I've probably just ruined whatever career he had by crippling him, she definitely despises me.

If she sees that I apparently don't hold a grudge, she may warm up to me - or it'll at least discourage her from doing anything to me over it. It also makes sure that her own hatred for me won't grow.

Meanwhile, mine will fester deep in my heart, never to be forgotten, always evolving.

Deuteronomy, chapter thirty-two, verse thirty-five: 'Vengeance is mine, and recompense, for the time when their foot shall slip; for the day of their calamity is at hand, and their doom comes swiftly.' [3]

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[1] Ioann is pronounced "eye-oh-ann" and means 'God has favored me'.

[2] Ioann is the Russian form of John, which is the context behind this little interaction. And his last/middle name doesn't literally mean 'Smith'; it's a comparison to show how generic it is. The last name is 'Ivanov', meaning 'son of Ivan', and Ivan also shares the same root as John/Ioann. I don't think anyone will appreciate the humor of making an MC named 'John, son of John' (after you dig into the etymology at least) in a sneaky way, but it's something for me to snicker about on my own.

[3] This is taken completely out of context; the one saying it is God, I'm pretty sure, and it's a reference to how the Bible always says to not enact your revenge because God will do it for you in the afterlife: 'Do not say, "I will repay evil"; wait for the Lord, and he will deliver you.'

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I was planning to finish their entire interaction in this chapter and leave it off at a cliffhanger when the MC is 'summoned', as mentioned in the chapter, but I won't make the chapters of this fic too long. I felt that this was a decent stopping point, even if it'll take a bit longer to get to the real story. Around half a chapter or so of boring stuff (being stuck in that room) left.

Also, the MC's full name sounds fancy and prestigious, but it's an incredibly basic Russian name. As Jacques said, 'it's basically John Smith in Russian form'; there's probably a hundred thousand Russians with a similar full name, not even counting the other Slavic Eastern European countries who all have reskinned versions of each others' names (Russian: Vladimir, Ukrainian: Volodymyr; the same logic applies to last names).

Next chapter will probably have a discord server for you guys to join too… I don't know how I'll make it, but I will.

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