22 Murky Thoughts

first time writing this romance stuff so turn your brain off for this chapter

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What a day.

The ring on my finger and hairpin he crafted glimmered in twilight as I looked at myself through the river.

Although he's a demon now, his body hasn't changed much, if anything he became cuter!

Aaaaahhh I still remember his horrified yet flustered face when he realized that as my husband, he was supposed to sleep together with me. Thankfully I have good self control or I might've just blanked out only to wake up on top him.

I wasn't a pervert, there's no way I would bed him when he's still conscious, I'll have to gather some wisteria on my way back. According to the folktales, those should be a fatal weakness to demons but I'm sure he won't remember anything after a heavy dose.

...Wait no, that's not my goal.

Yea... I need to turn him back.....bedding him can come later....wait NO!

DAMMIT, what is wrong with me. He really is insufferable.

I'll have to start working if I want this relationship to progress. Since demons exist, there must be a force to counter them, I'll need to keep yuuji out of their reach.

....

....Ughhh.....get out of my head yuuji.....this wasn't supposed to happen.

Perhaps I should join them? But how? I don't even know where to start...

"Haaa~ it's just one thing after another."

I was quite excited about my marriage. The wedding night was supposed to be perfect, perhaps it was fate that the carriage back home had a broken wheel which delayed my return.

I was terrified when I saw the blood at the front door back then. Even more after seeing a red headed demon with crystalline horns.

The stained yet still recognizable clothes indicated who it was but that only added more misery.

I was about to flee right then and there if not for glancing at his eyes..

Endless red....

They held signs of torment yet an astonishing indifference. It was clear that this being was on the verge of insanity.

Looking at him I remembered my younger days at the festival where we would see the jester doing all sorts of tricks with a happy face, a mask to even fool himself.

He resembled the jester..

That was not yuuji, that was something else wearing my husband's skin. He stole my husband!

I wanted to blame him for my loss, I wanted to vent. But that would not be fair to him. Call it instincts but I knew that he was not to blame..

I had set a goal that day.

To turn my husband back into a human. If turning into a demon brought him here then maybe turning back would bring my husband back too.

With that goal set, I had to hold him close. I couldn't let him escape with my husband's body.

So I took advantage of his radiating innocence....that almost made me...

𝑪𝒐𝒖𝒈𝒉.

It was obvious that he held himself responsible for possessing yuuji so I made him take responsible for the marriage.

It was embarrassing to prostrate myself and ask him to not abandon me. I had no choice, his highlighted lean muscles giving off a blue hue was a clear indication of the strength he had.

Those lean sweaty muscles...

𝑪𝑶𝑼𝑮𝑯!

Luckily he heeded to my request.

Now he's staying in the cave at the mountains while I collect intelligence about the forces at play here.

I still have no lead but I already expected this. I can't just expect to stumble on a secret organization on my way right?

The last thing to note was that I felt strangely comfortable around him after the first few months of sleeping at the cave.

The damp walls and hard ground no longer bothered me, I just asked him to let me sleep on top me.

Problem solved!

It's still my husband's body, so I might as well have my daily dose of hugs!

Nowadays I would feel my heart racing every time he would craft something new for me.

I don't remember when it started but I'm not complaining.

The only problem is that I feet him getting attached to me so I had to set the line.

But this is where the problem lays.

I can't tell him to restrain his growing feelings when he thinks we're a couple right?

Thus I can decided to come clean today. I can't keep lying to him anymore.

Thus I entered the cave to come clean..

Unfortunately things got out of hand from then on.

Now I'm here looking at my reflection on the river, waiting for the rumored demon.

I still remember the words he said.

I wish I could forget them but...I also wish to never forget them...

.

[Flashback]

"I have something to say to you koko."

"What is it yuuji san? Do you want to eat some flesh, if you want I could get the lambs I bought today."

"No, you already know I can control my urges. It's about something else."

"Well go on then."

".......I'M NOT YUUJI BUT SOMEONE ELSE. SORRYFORDECEIVINGYOU."

".....could you please repeat that."

"I'm actually..."

"So you're saying you're not from this world and you now possess this body. I already knew the latter part but the former is quite shocking.."

"..."

"Then who are you."

"I don't remember.."

"I see....."

"You seem awfully calm about this koko..."

"I have good self control."

"I'm sorry for not telling you sooner."

"It's not your fault but what's your plan now?"

"Live with you..."

".....huh?"

"I want to live with you."

"W-what!?"

"I want to be with you..."

"No wait, I'm a married woman and I have no feeling for you. Although I find you amusing and charming and seductive and innocent, I have no romantic feelings for you."

"Umm...could you re-"

"Don't change the topic!"

"..."

"So what were you saying yuuji san?"

"I know that you don't love me yet but I'm confident in my abilities. I won't force you, if you feel uncomfortable I'll go away, but as long as I'm with you, I want to show you how much you mean to me."

"I-it's not possible! I'm telling you it won't work!"

"If it won't then why are you so adamant about stopping me from trying?"

"T-that..."

"I'll wait no matter how long it takes. I don't know how much you love your husband but I will replace him no matter how long it takes. I won't do much. I'll just try my best to keep you happy. I'll make sure there's me in every happy memory of yours."

"I-I need some time!"

With that, I ran away from the cave...

.

"Haaa~ what mess have I gotten into..."

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Power stone? Power stone!