Where The Fuck Am I?

I stood frozen for a moment, unable to comprehend what I was hearing. As the reality sank in, I cautiously approached the door to my room, my heart pounding faster than ever.

The door was slightly ajar, and the unmistakable sounds of intimacy echoed through the room.

Anger and disbelief surged within me as I pushed the door open, revealing a sight that shattered my world.

There, on our bed, were Alex and another woman tangled in each other's arms. The room, which had once been a sanctuary of love and trust, now felt like a battleground of betrayal.

Tears welled up in my eyes as I took in the scene, my hands trembling with a mix of anger and heartbreak.

The moans that had filled my ears now felt like a mocking chorus of betrayal. I couldn't comprehend how the man I thought was my future husband could do this to me.

"Yes, Alexander, spank my ass, baby," the female voice screamed. "Alexander?" I staggered at those words, my body fell on the door, and I found myself sprawling on the floor of my room, watching my fiancé with another girl, whose face I hadn't seen yet in my presence.

He turned his attention to the door, and our eyes met. I expected him to stop and rush to his knees to beg for forgiveness, maybe if he did, I would forgive him. Instead, he tore his eyes away from me and continued to thrust into her more forcefully. My heart shattered into a million pieces.

"How dare you!" I screamed and wailed at the same time, and immediately, the lady flinched, pushed Alex away, and tried to hide her face. That's when I got a better view of her.

"Caroline, is that you?" I asked in a shaky voice, but she remained silent, trying to cover her face with her hair.

"Answer me, you fucking bitch!" I yelled angrily, banging my fist on the tiled floor.

"Yes, it's Caroline. What are you going to do about it!" Alex's voice thundered, piercing deep into my heart like a dagger. Slowly, Caroline lifted her head, which was previously hidden in shame, but now she seemed confident, Alex had boosted her confidence.

"Why are you doing this to me, Alex? Am I not good enough? Even if you're going to cheat on me, why must it be with my blood sister!" I yelled in pain. This pain was too much for me, today is supposed to be a happy day for me—why? I cried, clutching my heart, which hurt as if it's going to explode from my chest at any moment.

"I liked you at first, but in the long run, I got bored! You're too boring! Too easy! Too loving! Too masculine! You work like there's no tomorrow, making me forget I'm a man. I'm supposed to do those things for you. You don't push me to be a better person, and you are no longer beautiful, you are aging faster than you should. I want to be with your younger sister. She's feminine, and I want to be with someone like her, someone I can protect and provide for, not the other way around."

He ended those words and pulled my twenty-year-old sister to his chest, caressing her hair.

"Caroline baby, did he force or manipulate you to do this?" I questioned my little sister, hoping she would give me a positive answer. Instead, she shot me a deadly glare and hissed loudly.

"What do you think I am? A nine years old? Be for real!" she snapped rudely. "He already told you you're getting old."

"But I do those multiple jobs to take care of you and send you to college, Caroline," I cried bitterly, hoping this could be a dream, but I guess it's not.

I clenched my book angrily and tightly in my hand and ran out of the room in shame, disgust, and resentment overwhelming me. The two people I love most in my life just betrayed me, why is my life so miserable?

As I stepped out into the night, the cold air stung my tear-streaked face. My phone buzzed, a text from Olivia asking if I got home safely. I couldn't find the strength to respond, instead, I clutched my heart in pain and rushed to the rooftop deck of the ten story building I live.

Olivia was right all this time, I was a pickmesha. She told me countless times to stop being too nice that I'll get taken for granted, but I ignored her advice.

So she was right all this time. I wailed sadly.

I sent Alex through university and even got him the part-time job he's doing right now. Even though throughout that time, I was jealous of how lucky Olivia is to have men do things for her, I still held on to Alex with love.

I clutched my book against my chest and moved closer to the railings demarcating the rooftop.

I leaned closer to the railings and took a deep breath while my tears continued to stream from my eyes down to my cheeks and jawline.

"Maybe I don't deserve to be loved in this life, maybe this world doesn't want good people like me anymore. Maybe leaving is just the best," I murmured and carefully sat on the railings.

I closed my eyes, clutched my book unto my chest, thinking that if I'm to leave this world, I should go with something I cherish the most.

I took a deep last breath and tilted my head, freed my body, and off I go down the ten-story building.

{A few moments later}

I opened my eyes slightly, and a bright ray of light shone directly into my eyeball. I flinched and quickly shut my eyes before I get blinded.

Wait, what! Didn't I just try to unalive myself?

Am I not supposed to be rotting in hell already?

I shifted my face away from the direction of the sunlight and carefully opened them.

I couldn't believe what I was seeing, I saw the most beautiful landscape ever, green grass and colorful flowers graced this vast field. The heavenly scent of flowers filled my nostrils, and gently I rose to take a better view of the unknown location I found myself.

The view is breathtaking, it's just as if it was in paradise, at this point, I accept that I'm in paradise....hahahaha....

Death doesn't seem to be as scary as it was portrayed on Earth.

I began to walk around, hoping I will see a living creature apart from the butterflies flying around the field.

I haven't walked much when I began to hear a rustling sound coming from the covered path before me. As the path was covered by weeds, I quietly parted the stubborn grass, creating a hole that perfectly fit my head.

My eyes fell on something baffling, what is this creature? I tried to take a better look at the huge creature before me, but unfortunately, he turned his huge head, and his glistening soulless eyes fell on me.

Omg! I'm done for! Knowing there's nowhere to run to, I cunningly dropped to the grassy ground, faking a coma.

This ain't no paradise, where the fuck am I!!!!!????