1 CHAPTER 1

I lay down on the bed again with my face tucked up under my knees, it was hurting my back but I did not dare move because I knew the moment I tried, the more pain would engulf me, so I lay down feeling this horrifying pain. So is this what depression is like?

The persistent feeling of sadness or loss of interest that characterises major depression have lead me to a range of behavioural and physical symptoms or at least this is what I heard at my psychology class. Further, it may include erratic sleep pattern, irregular appetite, lower energy levels, concentration issues, lower self-esteem, high anxiety levels and sometimes eventually result in suicide.

Sooner or later, everyone gets the blues which differ greatly from depression- feeling sadness, loneliness, or grief when you go through a difficult life experience is part of being human. But what if you don't bounce back? What if you remain stuck at the rock bottom? What if that is how things will end for you? What happened to taking life as it comes?

Suddenly I hear a knock on my door. I raise my head a little, squinting my eyes I don't know how long I have been laying on the bed, obviously doing nothing. Again a knock, I see Kiara, who is three years older than me coming in with a plate of pancakes. God! This girl knows how to cheer me up.

"How are you feeling bitch!"she asked.

I look at her smiling, shaking my head, "Umm,you can say a little fine now." I stare at the plate and spread my both hands out like a little baby. She scoffs and hands me the plate. I do a sharing part here because I don't like eating alone, so I give her half of my pancake. She smiles kindly, the 'smile' which people could die for.

She was the most beautiful human being that I could ever have in my life. People wanted her presence but the anti-social person that she is, she maintained her distance. Her eyes were dark brown, the colour of mud after a heavy rainfall. She had brown hair that shone golden in the sun, which made me jealous somedays but always adore the life out of her. I'm proud of her, I have always been proud of her. The way she carried her self, the way she controlled her emotions and yet remained an emotional fool who cried for silly reasons, was nothing but marvellous. Since our mom died, she was left disturbed but I know that someday she will make her peace with it and realise that she is gone for her own good.

Our mother died in February. The time when Kiara had her finals, the most crucial part of her life but she still managed to score a solid 89% inspite of the tragedy. She managed to a 94% again to get her into the college of her dreams. She was the star child of our family. I don't know I could ever meet a more all-rounded person in my life other than my mom.

I gulped down my pancakes in two minutes, she stared at me with wide eyes, "You are a pig." And she began laughing.

"As if you finished an hour later", I said

And suddenly we both start laughing like hyenas.

No wonder she always made me smile. Then I hear a knock again and see dad standing there with his hands in his pockets smiling at us. Kiara invites him to come and sit with us. His strides were always long which I never could keep up with when walking with him. He sits beside us and smiles. We ask him about his day. He says us all about who he met and who called him. That was the thing I liked about our family. We started sharing everything now.

"How's school going?"

"Just normal, no new assignment, completed all projects so same old, same old", I said.

He looks at me with tired eyes which I realise is an indication that he wants to have some sleep.

"Dad, I think you need some sleep, your eyes have turned red."

"Yeah, I think so too because I don't see your grubby face right now", he smirked as he got up to leave.

I glare at him and at Kiara and we both begin laughing. We push him away out of the door, Kiara hugs me and gives me a peck on the cheeks. I laugh, she always had a habit of kissing me whenever she got a chance because she found different ways to irritate me everytime and she knew how short-tempered I was and also how much I hated it.

Turning my heels towards the bed I ran and jumped into the bed, pulled my sheets over me. Just lying there because I knew it was going to be a long night. I didn't usually sleep at night, and even if I wanted I couldn't. Since tomorrow I had school I set an alarm for 7 and turned towards the window, putting an effort to admire the moon, which I did most of the nights, in vain.

Perhaps tomorrow might be a new day.

*****

Hello beautiful people!

This is my first story I am going to give a shot at writing so please don't judge me just on this because, well I'm still 16 :)

So please any queries or suggestions, please do let me know.