Chapter 16

Flocks of guests arrived at the inn before nightfall. Magnolia Inn was the best accommodation in the area and Lord Waldorf's invitees flooded the place every year at the same time, in the end of autumn.

"Gosh, I forgot my handkerchief!" Lady Byrne suddenly said when Ava escorted her to the large dining room. It was dinner time and the guests started to pour into the room.

"Can you fetch it for me, darling?"

"Of course, my lady. I'll be right back."

As soon as Ava rounded a corner and disappeared, Lady Byrne rushed to an elegant couple sitting at the best table in the room.

"My lord, my lady. How delightful to see you."

Lady Byrne greeted the couple as she performed an elegant curtsy.

"Countess Byrne, nice to meet you here." Lady Cecily replied politely while Lord Carlton nodded at the older woman. A moment later, both ladies talked about the weather and their journey.

"I haven't seen His Grace and His Lordship. Surely they're coming as well?" The lady mentioned Magnus casually, and of course she had to mention his cousin as well not to raise any suspicion.

"His Grace is coming with Lady Selene Wyndham and her parents, Lord Wyndham and Her Royal Highness Princess Charlotte, they will be joining us here at any moment."

Lady Cecily paused for a while.

"My son has to go to London to settle some important business matters regarding our investment in the railways. It's kind of ... urgent."

Lord Carlton snorted beside her.

"Oh, dear!" Lady Byrne blurted. "That's too bad."

"Pardon?" Lady Cecily frowned at Lady Byrne unexpected response.

"Oh I mean... that's too bad His Lordship couldn't attend Lord Waldorf's house party. He would miss all the amusement there."

"Indeed." After a moment's silence, Lady Cecily replied. Lady Byrne made a polite excuse and left the couple. Ava joined her some time later at their dining table.

"Oh, dear." The lady looked at her with pitiful gaze.

"My lady? What's wrong?" Ava glanced worrily at her.

"Nothing..." the lady looked away from her, pretending to scrutinize the pattern of the tablemat.

"Good Lord! Carlton!" Lady Cecily hissed as she squeezed her husband's hand.

"Look who's sitting next to Countess Byrne!"

Lord Carlton followed his wife's gaze.

"Who's the girl? Her relatives?"

"It's the peahen Magnus was crazy about not so long ago!"

"How could she be here? Little chance she was invited to Waldorf's party, isn't it?"

"I don't know!" Lady Cecily frowned in disdain.

"I guess she is coming with Countess Byrne. Looks like she is doing a job as the lady's companion. Such an ambitious girl. She certainly knows how to make her way up to a higher ground. To be a companion allows her to be seen by nobles and gentry..... We should be grateful Magnus ran away."

"It won't change the fact that his allowance will be sliced in two until an indefinite time."

Lord Carlton replied indifferently. Strongly disapproved of the idea, Lady Cecily threw a schorching glare at him.

Ava was observing Lady Byrne's sudden change of mood when something alarmed her. She turned to the doorway as if something called her from the direction. He appeared there and her heart sped up at the sight of him. In split second she noticed Lady Selene was with him, holding his arm as they swept through the doorway. The couple drew admiring glances as they crossed the room.

"Beautiful couple, aren't they? They're perfect."

Lady Byrne sighed in admiration.

"I've never seen a couple so perfectly fit for each other."

For some reasons, she couldn't bring herself to reply. She pretended to take a goblet of water and sipped slowly. A sudden thought crossed her mind.

If the duke and his family were here, it meant... Magnus was here as well. She checked across the room quickly. Her heart began to pound at the anticipation of seeing him in the most unexpected time. Both Magnus' parents and Lady Selene's were at the table, but Magnus wasn't there. After a thorough observation for some time, she found out that there was no sign of his presence.

She wondered when she would be able to see him again. It had been months since their last meeting. In the first few days of their separation, she half feared, half expected him to come to see her anyway. She spent many times thinking of the right answer if he ever came to her and asked her to be back. She imagined him telling her that he missed her, that he realized that he couldn't live without her, and that he would elope with her. But it never happened until now. Did he miss her as much as she missed him? Although she never promised to wait for him, she still believed someday he would come back to her.

There were times she was really tempted to walk to the captain's house to see him, but she was too afraid to do it. She feared that the duke would carry out his threat if she dared to ignore his order.

And quite suddenly and unexpectedly things changed in a matter of days. In turn and twist of fate, now the duke and she were on friendly terms. And in the midst of cold and arid loneliness, she had somewhat infatuated with him.

From a distance, Ava stole a glance at the duke. He was sitting beside Lady Selene, and Ava saw him serving the lady first, putting some food in her plate. The lady said something to him, most likely in a low voice because he leaned closer and lowered his head to her, then murmured his reply in her ear. Ava imagined him whispering answer to his fiancée in a sweet voice, and felt a stinging prick inside her.

Did he always speak softly to his lady? Did he always say nice and kind words to her? But he admitted that he didn't know much about his fiancée. She averted her eyes from the couple. Why did she feel this way? She shouldn't be bothered by their intimate gesture, as much as she shouldn't be pleased that he wasn't that close to his fiancée.

An hour later, most of the women started to leave the dining room while the servants were serving wine to the men. Ashton was staring idly at the burgundy liquid in the crystal glass when Lord Kent, one of a few noble fellow that was quite close to him, came over and gave him a friendly pat. The young lord sat on the empty chair next to him and lifted his glass.

"Cheers to your good health and happiness, Vermont."

Lord Kent shifted his gaze following Selene who was walking out of the dining room with her maid.

"I would give anything to take your place. You have everything most men could only dream of. Superior title, a considerable amount of wealth, great power and a goddess of a bride. I can't imagine if there is more you could possibly want."

Unfortunately there was more. There was things he wanted more than what he already had. If he could, he would give up anything he had to get it all. As he watched the raven-haired beauty across the room, he couldn't help thinking if only things were different. If only he were born as his cousin.

Magnus had everything he could only wish for, anything he could never have. Magnus was the one who had her heart. Magnus was the man she truly loved. Magnus had a little more freedom to do what he really wanted. He had a father and a mother who loved him unconditionally, and his parents loved each other as well. He had a real family.

From the corner of his eye, he noticed his uncle was talking with his wife with a disapproving look. Despite the couple's relentless arguments every single day, somehow he knew, they couldn't live without each other. His uncle was a cold, calculating man, so it surprised him the first time he knew that his uncle didn't allow his wife to bear another child after her long, suffering hours of giving birth to Magnus. Aunt Cecily survived a dangerous loss of blood at the time and his uncle swore never to make her pregnant again. He wondered if he could have such a fortunate union with Selene.

It was funny how a person could value anything he didn't have, yet took for granted anything he had. He and his cousin were perfect examples. Magnus envied him for all his life, for things he considered simply a full responsibility, and he wanted what Magnus had already had, yet failed to properly appreciate.

He caught a glimpse of her rising to help the lady on her feet. As if she could feel his stare, she turned her head and met his eyes. She smiled faintly at him over her shoulders before leaving, and he felt twinged inside. Just hours ago he thought he would lose her forever and never see her again. And when he knew that she wasn't leaving, he couldn't remember when he had ever been that happy in years. Just a glimpse of her could bring every nerve in his body came to life, and he couldn't help thinking that the sight of Selene had never stirred an intense emotion like this. He would never understand how Magnus could totally comply with his order to separate from her, because if he were Magnus, he would never let her go no matter what.

*****

Long past midnight, after hours of unavailing attempt to get some sleep, Ava finally gave up and rolled stealthily out of the bed. She kept one eye on the lady as she moved quietly across the room and put on her silk robe. Through the window, she got a glimpse of the sea gleaming in the moonlight. She trod to the door and pushed the knob very carefully as to not making any sound and sneaked out.

She slipped out of the inn and crossed the empty road. The dark road was illuminated by the moon's pallid radiance, the cool wind blew through her hair. As she made her way down to the seashore, she was suffused with a wild excitement. The comforting rhythm of ebb and flow and the sea-scented breezes surrounding her.

Suddenly she caught sight of a dark shape in a short distance ahead. She held her ground instantly and peered at the lone figure. A man was standing in the dark. She prepared to turn around and run. The inn was only a few feet away across the street. The clouds rifted and a pale light found its way down the shore. Moonbeams cast over him, and she recognized him in an instant. She didn't understand why a series of coincidence continued to happen between them, but she knew she couldn't let it go further. She turned around, aiming to leave at once.

"It's dangerous for a woman to be out alone at this hour."

She stopped at once. Slowly she turned toward him. He was looking at her over his shoulder.

"Seems like these accidental meetings are becoming a habit."

She blushed. Did he imply any suspicion that she was stalking him all along?

"I'm sorry I've intruded your privacy. I thought no one was around."

"Do you always wake up this early?"

She didn't want to tell him she was wide awake all night reliving their moments together the afternoon before, so she offered up a small lie.

"No, I just happened to wake up some time ago and can't get back to sleep. What about you?"

"I haven't slept an hour, I have a lot on my mind."

He paused and his eyes retraced their path back to the shore.

"I can't stop thinking about Matthew."

"You can't sleep because of that?"

She stared at him with widening eyes. She wouldn't expect him to care so deeply about the child.

"Do you think he will come tomorrow?"

"Supposed to be. Why won't he?"

"Suddenly I got a bad feeling that I've lost him."

She considered the possibility.

"If he never comes, it means he wants to be free. Some people just don't want to come under someone else."

"I should have taken him with me rightaway."

She observed him with newfound curiosity.

"Will you feel the same way about another kid?"

"What do you mean?"

"There are so many children like him in the street. Will you do the same if it's not Matthew? Will you feel the same way to any other child like you feel about Matthew?"

When her question met with silence, she asked again carefully.

"He is somewhat special, isn't he? What makes you so bothered? Why do you care so much about him?"

He stared at somewhere in the end of the ocean, it seemed he was in deep thought.

"I don't know, it's just... he makes me feel more than just a deep sympathy for him. I feel moved."

She recalled how forlorn the child was in his skeleton face.

"Because he is so frail and vulnerable?"

"It's not his fragility that moved me. I feel drawn to him, not by pity, but by his strength..."

There was an unmistakable hint of admiration in his voice.

"He might look plainly vulnerable, but he has a stout spirit. He doesn't easily crack under pressure. He has persevered a tough life on his own. I stand in awe of him."

She felt like everytime they met, she discovered something new about him, and it never failed to amaze her.

"I never imagined I would ever heard something like that from you."

"What?"

"You, admiring a guttersnipe."

She anchored her attention on him.

"At first I thought you were just another heartless aristocrat who cared nothing but your personal interest."

Once it was said, she regretted it immediately.

"Sorry. I shouldn't say that."

Unexpectedly he responded softly.

"Tell me more."

When she fell silent in hesitation, he encouraged her.

"I want to know. All you think about me. The worst things."

"Really? You won't be angry?"

"I promise."

"I thought you were cold, arrogant, cruel, derisive and... you have a devil of a temper. Until I got the chance to know you and find out what you truly are."

"What did you find?"

"I found you're all that and more."

"I'm all that?"

He raised his brow as if irritated, but she caught a faint, helpless smile on the corner of his lips. Noticing that he was rather amused, she replied playfully.

"In every way possible."

His smile was contagious, she found herself smiling back at him. She walked toward him slowly, absentmindedly, as if charmed by the moonlight captured in his eyes. She stopped a step away from him.

"But I also found that you are virtuous, brave, dutiful, reliable and you are sensitive and caring... you are a true nobleman in every sense of the word."

It seemed like the moon cast its spell upon him too, because his eyes riveted on her face, not wasting a second to stray or blink.

"Would you like to know what I think of you?"

"I guess at first it was anything but nice."

"I thought you were an enchantress."

He had a way of saying it without making it sound terrible. Actually she was rather flattered.

"Whatever it means, I'm glad you've finally come to realize that you're quite mistaken."

"Not entirely."

His eyes beheld hers in a way that stole her breath.

"Because right now, you truly look like one."

A sudden alarm caught her in the vulnerable moment. She turned away immediately, her mind racing with a rising sense of panic. She had gone too far, again and again, she was flirting with danger. She startled with a gasp when he took hold of her hand and forced her to face him.

"Why are you suddenly leaving?

"I should never have been alone with you at this very moment."

She said, couldn't quite meet his eyes.

"If anyone sees us, your reputation will suffer and it might lead to a terrible scandal."

Being reminded of their differences once again, his fingers on her wrist loosened, and she pulled away from his grip. All traces of delight faded in the realization of the cold, absolute fact.

"I must leave now."

She turned around, averting her face from him.

"Wait. I have something to say to you."

She stopped walking with a sudden leap of heart. Yet she couldn't bring herself to face him. Her heart thudded against her ribs in the expectation of his words.

"I think you are a respectable woman in every way that matters. It's not just it being in the blood..."

A moment's silence before he continued.

"Forgive me for the way I treated you before. It was terribly wrong."

"I appreciate your apology."

It was all she could say. And she dashed across the stony land to the road. He watched until the last sight of her vanished beyond the inn's wall. He should be glad she withdrew before he could have said or done something that would humiliate them both in the morning, but all he could feel was an absurd feeling of loss.

He stared down the rolling waves crashing the rocky shore. The rhythmic sound was soothing before, but now somehow it had turned to be an empty beat. Suddenly the ocean was lonely and dreary, and the sky above him darkened as a mass of drifting cloud swallowed up the moon. The last glint of moonbeam faded, leaving him with nothing but the whine of the ocean and darkness.

*****