17 Chapter 17: Return home

"And here we are." Lady Phenix walked through a set of thoroughly over-the-top double doors that made the entrance to a 'small residence' she had bought in the Human World.

Momonga considered the circumstances for a while before realizing that the Phenix family were, in fact, filthy rich.

'I may have to consider if I can find a way to replicate the creation of phoenix tears, or find a way to mass produce basic healing potions… to think that having a tap for healing potions in one's eyes could make one so rich.' Momonga thought as he rubbed his cheek thoughtfully, looking at the exterior of the manor in front of him. '...Then again, I'd probably just hoard the healing potions myself if I created a tap like that. Although... I already have a tap like that available, assuming Sirzech's guess that the Elder Lich I created had kidnapped Lord Phenix holds true.'

He thought about the Elder Lich that had been created into Riser Phenix's body and realized that he'd probably need to contact it at some point to see what it was doing, and relay some orders for it. There were so many experiments he needed to do but couldn't do himself due to his current situation, namely because he was flanked by his Peerage and likely constantly under the surveillance of at least one raid boss, so having the Elder Lich do the experiments in his stead seemed optimal.

'So… Can summoned undead contribute or gain experience? How much sentience do created undead have? Does the Elder Lich have Lord Phenix, and if yes, can he have the Lord cry a literal river of healing potions for resale?' Momonga thought about a series of experiments he'd have the Lich do, and paused his thoughts before he'd get too excited or his expression would change.

He glanced to the side where an out-of-breath looking delivery man was carrying a small library of magic-related books Momonga had bought from the Underworld's capital after Yubelluna and Xuelan had finished shopping for their 'replacement wardrobe' and Momonga had fought through his embarrassment to place an order for a full shipment of 'mana potions'. Afterwards he had picked up the rest of his Peerage and Ravel, getting slapped twice by the utterly enraged blonde girl for some reason that completely eluded Momonga, and then proceeded to a rendezvous point from where they'd get teleported to the Human World.

Sirzechs had been at the rendezvous point with Souji, and the Lucifer had teleported the whole group to a more modern building, which was presumably located in the Human World.

Momonga, or rather, Suzuki Satorou had to pause for a while as he looked up at the sky of the human world he had landed in for the first time, seeing clear blue skies with occasional clouds. The air had been clear and breathable, making stark contrast to the one in the 'human world' where Suzuki Satorou had lived, that being a world where the past nuclear wars and unrestricted industry had turned sky into a smoggy dome that barely let light through it, turning sickly orange come dawn or dusk, while the air itself had been only barely breathable without respirators and filters, although going for a while without air purification equipment could lead to a myriad of sicknesses or exposure states.

He hadn't been surprised by the clear air of the Underworld, after all he had thought about it as a separate 'instance' like a version of the sixth floor of Nazarik, but the Human World seemed so real in comparison.

So, since the fleshy body he had could do it, he had taken a deep breath and mentally thanked Ddraig for dragging him into the world at YGGDRASIL's end, before going forward with the rest of his Peerage in tow, albeit leaving them a bit confused over 'Issei's reaction to something as mundane as the sky. 'I should probably thank that dragon at some point… although I think that because of our first meeting he'd probably think I had some nefarious agenda that needed fulfilling and freak out if he heard me saying thanks.''

And then the group had been teleported again, this time landing in front of the 'humble' manor Lady Phenix had bought with almost frivolous ease.

"Lady Akeno, we have taken the liberty of acquiring your personal items from thine previous abode and brought them here. They are packed and are currently in the building's storage room. The purchases from today's excursion have been placed to thine assigned room on the second floor." a person, presumably a devil as well, notified Akeno while handing the girl a piece of paper that presumably contained the list of her belongings. Momonga observed the interaction from the side and noted that the girl seemed decidedly unhappy that her items had been moved.

'I can't blame her… If someone just barged into Nazarik, somehow defeated all the security systems, and rounded up everything inside and then dumped it into a new place that I had to then call home from there on forwards I'd be livid.' Momonga scratched his cheek as he thought about the girl's mood. 'I may have to talk to her about her situation, she can't be happy about this. And I think the same applies to everyone else… I should have bought a book on late teenager and young adult psychology.'

"Young Lord Phenix…" The devil who had delivered the list to Akeno then moved to Momonga. "...We have failed to acquire your personal belongings from your previous abode. A pair of people claiming to be your parents attempted to halt us, but we wiped their minds of our passing. We were denied from acquiring the belongings by force. This order came from Lady Phenix, who was advised to do so by Grayfia-sama. I hope this does not cause distress or an issue?"

'Mind-wiping? If that's what it sounds like it'd be something like [Control Amnesia] which is a tenth-tier spell… So even this humble delivery man can cast equivalents of tenth tier spells...' Momonga felt sweat falling down his back. "A-ah, don't worry about it. I'll go fetch them personally if necessary."

The man bowed slightly and moved onward after telling him that his shoppings would be transferred to the master bedroom on the second floor and the library on the first floor.

Momonga felt his earlier nervousness creep back into his mind as he realized how truly screwed up the balance of power was in the world he found himself in. 'Seriously, were Rias and her group just so incredibly weak that they almost wiped to a single Death Knight, or are just about everyone else so incredibly strong? Did I just fill my party of people who are the equivalents of level one players and everyone else is already at max level or at least close?'

Another possibility entered his mind. '...Although, there's a chance that the magic in this world is just so alien to YGGDRASIL that something it could do easily would be an impossibility for the other, and vice versa? It's a possible theory, but I'd have to test it out in combat, perhaps by fighting against someone who fights for real and seeing how they resist YGGDRASIL's spells… That red dragon doesn't count.'

When Ddraig came to Momonga's mind he realized that he should probably check up on the dragon sometime soon. It hadn't felt like that his inventory was getting messed up or anything, so he had figured that everything was alright in there. But assumption makes poor basis for decision.

Regardless, if Momonga daydreamed any longer he'd likely fall asleep standing and cause a scene so he instead herded Koneko and Asia into the manor, both of whom were staring at it goggle-eyed. It seemed that both of the girls were quite ascetic as well, since both of them had next to no personal belongings that could be relocated to the building's storage room.

"Alright, I'll chat about the management side of things with Lady Phenix. You guys should probably go explore the house or check your bedrooms on the second floor." Momonga turned to address his Peerage. "We'll gather somewhere afterwards and see about our future affairs."

A chorus of 'okay' and 'sounds good' responded to him. However, before Momonga realized it, Yubelluna and Xuelan had flanked him and both women kissed his cheeks at the same time, leaving the body-snatcher Overlord in a completely stunned state.

Xuelan waved back playfully as she and Yubelluna retreated up the stairs to the second floor after suppressing a giggle over the expressions that had spread over the rest of Momonga's Peerage's faces.

"Uwah." Koneno's voice was quite disturbed. "Hentai is cheating already. Wait, how did… is hentai blackmailing Xuelan-san and Yubelluna-san?"

"A-ah, I don't think Issei would do that…" Asia was blushing to her hairline, again, and she took Koneko's hand before leading her up the stairs as well. "Um, perhaps he's just become popular?"

"..." Koneko's eyes widened in horror and the two practically fled upstairs.

Momonga felt that the horrified behaviour of Koneko was muted somewhat by how she and Asia kept hugging the plushies Momonga had bought for them.

Yuuto seemed to sense a change in the air and evacuated himself as well, leaving just Momonga to face Rias and Akeno, the former was looking at him with her mouth agape and with a expression of shock on her face, and the latter was looking like she had just caught a kid whose hand had been in the cookie jar, complete with a sadistic and joyful expression gracing her features.

Momonga could have sworn he heard a faint 'kukuku…' coming from the raven-haired girl's direction.

"Well, um, Akeno-san, I'm not sure if your room is next to Rias's and mine this time, but I'll find a way to rectify this situation we've found ourselves in." Momonga decided that he wasn't prepared for the fallout, and decided to instead hop into a bunker that was the management conversation with Lady Phenix. "Please go check out the estate, we'll discuss this, uh, incident later. Yes, definitely. Also, despite what you just saw, please don't worry, Rias. I am not planning on committing adultery. Such would be a great disgrace for me personally and great disgrace for the family name."

Rias flinched violently, causing Momonga to pause before he realized the source of the girl's distress. "Ah, I do not think your relationship with Akeno-san is adultery towards myself. After all, she's your girlfriend from before our political union. So please don't think that what you saw was me 'getting equal', that was not at all my intention."

Rias seemed to stumble over the flat floor and Akeno caught her just before she'd fall on her face. "Ufufufufu… Rias-chan, you heard the man, let's go check~out~the~bed~room…"

Momonga mentally thumbled up Akeno for distracting Rias and made his own escape towards Lady Phenix.

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"URGH!" Rias half sobbed half groaned as she flopped on the king-sized bed of what would be her and Issei's bedroom. The soft sheets muffled her grumbling as she lied face-down on it.

"Ufufu, I thought new Issei would be boring and scary, but it turns out that he's boring, scary and entertaining." Akeno flopped next to Rias on the bed that looked like it could easily support six or seven people. "What are we going to say to Sona-chan? I think as the school council prez she'd want to know about the change in Issei. And I'm so looking forward to seeing the shockwave Issei is going to cause when he goes back to school!"

"Ugh, don't remind me…" Rias groaned. "Can we keep my status as Issei's wife a secret from everyone?"

"With your surnames changed?" Akeno covered her mouth with her hand, pretending shock. "Ara ara, I think that the new Issei would likely introduce himself as 'I am Issei Phenix, husband of Rias Phenix, pleasure to meet you' if the class wanted to know more about him."

"Fine…" Rias grumbled to a pillow she had pulled under her head. "Let's just unpack my stuff and head downstairs. You don't have much to unpack, right?"

"I'll assume my 'home' in the shrine was raided so I guess… well, it's not like I had many possessions in the first place…" Akeno's statement turned muffled as Rias rolled over and hugged her close. "Ara ara, Rias-chan, how bold, please wait until the night until we consummate our love! What would Issei, or Lady Phenix, think if we went at it in his bed, again?"

Rias groaned into Akeno's boobs as Akeno's teasing caused her to blush to her eyebrows. "I'm going to murder you."

"Ara, you're going to take me until nothing but my ravaged body remains?" Akeno returned teasing with a full broadside, causing Rias's confidence severe damage.

"Akeno…" Rias moaned in embarrassment and buried her head deeper between Akeno's breasts, causing Akeno to chuckle and then hug the red-head's face so it was mushed between her bosom. "...Buh, canth breafth…"

"Ara, death by suffocating between the breasts of a stunningly beautiful girl. Some men would pay a lot for the experience." Akeno giggled before letting Rias go, and then hopping up from the bed. "Now, then, let's sort your belongings before Issei-kun comes in and asks us to come downstairs, and finds us in a compromising position."

"Um, did you read the letter Lady Phenix put on the table this morning?"

"I did. I'll just sneak in and sleep under the bed." Akeno chuckled at Rias's mortified expression. "Just in case Issei-kun goes overboard. Remember, volcanos and lidded cans."

"Ugh… what is this, a cheap romance novel…" Rias groaned to her pillow and then stood up from the bed. "Fine, but I know Lady Phenix is not joking with her threat that she's going to come and watch if Issei and me don't c-consumm… erm… do 'that' soon…"

"Well, at least you've relaxed a bit." Akeno noted. "You couldn't stop talking about the Supreme Being attacking at any second earlier. You've gone a whole ten minutes without mentioning it."

"Ugh… I still feel that something is going to go terribly wrong, but not as strongly." Rias sighed. "That shopping trip was just too perfect to be true."

"Perhaps you two can try again by going on a date?" Akeno covered her mouth with her hand, feigning thoughtfulness. "After all, I escorted you today, perhaps the next time Issei will escort you in the underwear shop? You can show him all sorts of garment options…"

The red-head turned as red as her hair as Akeno finished her sentence. "Y-you know, let's just unpack."

"Ufufu, sure." Akeno started to go over a cardboard box that contained Rias's clothes and put them neatly in a wardrobe that spanned almost the length of the wall next to the bed. The room had a wall-wide window on the opposite side of the wall where the door was, one wall was blocked by the wide bed, and one sported a bookshelf, table, and a long couch.

The room was approximately the size of a living room, which felt oddly small considering how much of the room was taken by the bed, and also taken by the piles of cardboard boxes and moving crates that were stacked neatly on the floor.

Rias sighed as she went over to one of the stacked towers of cardboard boxes and opened the top box.

And her eyes turned as wide as saucers as she looked at the rows and rows of blue cans that were inside. Then looked over to see that the rest of the cardboard boxes that had been stacked bore similar markings, making her fairly confident that the contents were the same.

She picked up one of the cans and read the label, hoping that she was wrong.

"Oh. No."

"Ara?" Akeno turned over from the voice, and burst into laughter after realizing what Rias was holding. "Ufufu. it looks like Lady Phenix really wants grandkids!"

Rias could only stare at the cans in horror. 'Just… how much 'that' is she expecting me to do with Issei?'

"Sorry for interrupting, but we're about to go over the… ah." Issei's voice interrupted the two as he opened the door to invite Akeno and Rias to somewhere. His eyes were drawn to the can in Rias's hand. "Umu, those would be mine. Please don't worry about getting them sorted, I can put them in Inve- I mean, to storage afterwards."

Rias dropped the can in shock as she turned towards Issei. "Y-you bought them?"

"Well, they seemed useful." Issei nodded with a slight blush on his cheeks, causing Rias's already blushed face to turn the colour of a ripe tomato. "I'll have to experiment later to see if they work like I think they do, but, well, that's not important right now. We're having a conference downstairs, and I'd like for my entire Peerage to be present. Please join us when you can."

Issei closed the door, causing Rias to fall on her knees while Akeno, no longer capable of holding her mirth, just flopped back on the bed and giggled uncontrollably.

"Ara, when you said you were 'literally screwed' this morning I didn't know you referred to a power drill instead of a screwdriver." Akeno laughed, causing Rias to flop over on the floor.

"I'm so scr… you know what, I'm not going to say that."

"Already reserving yourself for tonight, eh?"

"Screw you, Akeno."

"Oo, bold. Maybe I'll climb up to the bed when you're ready to tap out and see if I can oblige with that order."

"Akenoooo…. nooo…."

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"Alright, now that we've gathered, let's go over the rules of this abode." Momonga opened the conversation as his Peerage had gathered around a dining table in the dining room of the estate. Lady Phenix had departed after Momonga had gone over the financial and management side of the house, stating that she needed to return to Underworld with Ravel and see about managing the family's finances now that she was the standing leader of the family until her husband returned.

Suzuki Satorou felt not insignificant amount of shame for knowing that he could help the woman's sorrow by contacting the Elder Lich and, if he still had the Lord, have him 'escape'.

But Momonga's cold rationale won as he reasoned that Lord Phenix likely knew too much already, and thus could possibly blow his cover, not to mention the benefits of a tap of Phoenix Tears at hand.

In the end Momonga had just escorted the woman to the entrance of the house, flanked on the other side by Ravel who had seemed incredibly annoyed with Momonga, and followed by the service staff who had been responsible for flash-renovating the estate with magic.

He shook his head mentally to clear it of stray thoughts and focused on his Peerage who were looking at him after his initial announcement.

"Firstly, there are three floors to this house and a basement. First floor contains communal rooms like the living room, dining room, kitchen and relaxation rooms that contain games, couches, and suchlike. The storage room is on the far side of the building in the first floor. The basement has a small pool and a gym. The second floor has your personal rooms and bedrooms. The third floor has some extra storage, a magical research room, and a library." Momonga listed the building's layout. "In addition there is a shed outside that contains a emergency teleportation circle that takes you to Phenix family's grounds in the Underworld, but the teleporter works only one way and due to being unsupported by a leyline, it won't last more than a dozen teleports or so. In addition the shed has a set of teleportation circles that takes us to an undisclosed location in the Underworld where we can train, but the circles have to be renewed after a single two way trip. Any questions?"

"Where do the servants sleep?" Xuelan asked, lifting her hand. "This place has to have service staff, right?"

"Well, no. A group of janitors will come every other weekend but outside that, there won't be any long-term servants in the premises." Momonga tilted his head. "I felt that we probably won't need any so I requested none to be assigned."

In truth, having someone dedicate their job to just feeding Momonga and cleaning his place of stay seemed incredibly demeaning, not to mention he didn't really feel comfortable getting followed by a maid or a butler everywhere. Thus the decision made sense to him, even more so since it allowed the third floor to be turned into a place of research and library instead of being turned to servants quarters.

"Then who's going to cook and clean?!" Xuelan seemed outraged. Yubelluna seemed confused, while others were more accepting of the situation, albeit Rias looked a bit resigned.

"We'll have to make a rotation." Momonga placed a pen and paper on the table, causing all colour to flood out of Xuelan's face.

"W-we have to cook for ourselves? And clean?"

"Yes."

"...This is a bad idea. Really bad idea." Xuelan glanced at Yubelluna, who tilted her head at the qipao-wearing Rook in confusion. "Please, don't make Yubelluna cook. No-one should be subjected to that witchcraft."

"Hey, I think Riser liked it!" Yubelluna objected. "He ate the whole bowl!"

"You made instant ramen, and he tipped the bowl to a trash can when you weren't looking. How exactly did you manage to make a cthulhu from a pack of food that self-cooks if you just add hot water?"

"Alright, in that case we'll just have to cook together. This will be an excellent team-building exercise." Momonga clapped his hands together before the fight between two women could get out of hand. 'Interesting, Yubelluna has skill levels in Poisoner. That is a very useful skill, although I'll have to be careful to keep her from creating food that is eaten by allies since friendly fire exists in this place.'

"And on that note, has anyone here cooked extensively before?" While Suzuki Satorou could cook to a decent degree Momonga had no levels in Cook, so he probably couldn't help. But he could at least ferry ingredients.

A few hesitant hands lifted themselves and the preparation for the dinner started.

Which, after managing to distract Yubelluna, went surprisingly well.

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"AAAH!" a pained cry echoed in a cavern as a blob of roughly human-shaped flesh quivered under the pain [Stitch] caused.

"Hm, interesting. It looks like the regeneration ability doesn't spread if foreign flesh is stitched into the host, at least under normal circumstances." The Elder Lich whose body was once known as Riser Phenix noted on his research papers, putting aside his needle and thread. "Necrotic flesh is healed to a degree by the tears, while undead flesh is burned. Same applies when flesh is attached to host via [Stitch]. However undead flesh that is stitched onto phoenix flesh, when the latter is under [Sealing Cloth], is turned into living flesh once the cloth is removed…"

The now partly broken and mummy-like lips of the creature spread into an inhumanly long smile. "My research is advancing at a rapid pace, all thanks to you, Lord Phenix. For that, I am truly grateful."

The blob of flesh let a pained groan as the Elder Lich cut the now-alive stitched flesh off the man's stomach and placed it in a vat. "Soon… very soon… Soon I will no longer be a disappointment to the Supreme Being! Soon I shall be a true Undead Phoenix!"

Crackling laughter echoed in the ominously lit cavern, the light revealing rows of lesser skeletons, zombies and heavily armored undead of fourth tier that the Elder Lich had created in his pursuit of reaching the goal his perfect master had decreed for him.

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Rias shivered as she felt that something was about to go horribly wrong, which had nothing to do with Yubelluna trying to assure Issei that she could be trusted to add spices to a piece of meat simmering in a pot.

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