"Unknown"

Chapter 9

The current time is 11:26pm. We finishes eating dinner few hours ago. Amane along with Diane and Asuza have gathered in single room to have some girl talk. I don't know anything about it but since it's girls gathering, I didn't bother to pry since I'm out of place.

The lights in my room was still on, it happens because I'm resting my slightly red cheeks due to cold wind on my palm at the open window, gape at the night sky, almost look like some stupid kid day dreaming.

I wanted to smoke cigarettes before going to bed but don't have any stick left. "I guess I should go to convince store..." I speak to myself and head out of the bedroom.

On my way outside, I could hear three of them laughing together. They were probably talking about ridiculous things which only girls could comprehend. I look away from their door and keep walking downstairs. The sounds of their laughter becomes quieter everytime I take a step downstairs.

The convenience store isn't far away from my home. When I reaches the shoe cabinet, I change my slippers into my outdoor and head out of the house.

The moment I step outside, strong breeze of wind hits my legs and cold creep around my body. It gives me chills buy I didn't pay ignore the cold and keep start to take a step to the convenience store.

All of the lights inside the house of neighborhood have been turned off. Only the light from lamp post guiding me, on my way to the store. Despite moving to a different town where security with high level of security, I still couldn't let my guard down.

After all, someone can take me out in the dark area of this town. More than ten minutes have passed and I reaches the empty convenient store.

This place is always full during day time and only number of people stay during night time. This place is mostly being use by students, buying different kinds of stuffs.

I pushes the glass door and head inside. The cold air comings from air conditioner and the cold temperature outside give me frozen feeling, as if I'm wandering inside the freezer.

I don't want to stay at the cold place for too long so, I immediately purchase the pack of cigarettes and pay, it was rather fast transaction between me and the staff.

At first I'm planning on staying at the park to smoke. However, that place is far away from my current house. So I just put the pack of cigarettes inside my pocket and keep on walking. "I guess, I will smoke cigarettes when I came back home...." I muttered to myself.

On my way home, I glance at the street and notices a strange color combinations of signal light. Without a doubt a car is following me, I turn around to see what kind of transportation it is and sighted a familiar looking vehicle.

"A police mobile?" I speak out loud after witness the car. At first I thought it was ambulance or some kind of night patrol, I did expect it to be a police mobile.

I stop walking on my tracks and keep an on the blue and red lights which flickering without sounds of siren. The car slows down and the driver give me a light honk.

The black tinted window is being slowly open, and a familiar looking person made an appearance. Out eyes meet each other and she start talking to me. "Oh Ameguri-kun, what are you doing outside at this late hour?" It was the pair of police officer, Tachibana and Ramirez.

"I'm just out for a shopping." I respond to them and look away.

"Come on now, head inside we are going to give you a ride." Ramirez give me an offer but I just shake my head indicating my refusal.

"No thanks... I'm good besides it would be better if you patrol here instead of giving me a ride." I turn around and keep on walking but her next words stop me from my tracks.

"Actually, I have something important to tell you." Ramirez speak to me with low voice, hinting that it's an important matter.

"Something important to tell me?" I asked them a question for clarification after slowly turn my head on them.

She didn't say a word and only give me a nod as sign of response.

"Alright... But we are going to a different location... I move to a different house." I open the car door at back seat and head inside.

"Did you move to a different house? Well it's a good thing if that was the case but never mind that..." Ramirez cut her own words, I reaches my phone towards her showing the location of my new place.

She glance at it and immediately focus her gaze on the street. While driving, she started to talk about the thingsshe wanted to say. "About the important matter Ameguri-kun... I happen to overheard the conversation between my chief and some unknown caller."

Ramirez cut her own words. I keep my eyes on her and notices that the expression on her face turns into serious one. "The caller is requesting for information about you, when I say information. I meant everything we know about you."

Ramirez stops talking and Tachibana continue in her place. "Normally, we cannot give any important information to outsiders but it seems the chief is even wary of the caller, he is probably a high ranking official."

I put my index finger on my chin along with my thumb and gently rub it wjein deep thoughts. After thinking for a minute, I ask them a question. "About me? Are you guys sure it's requesting for my information?"

"Yeah... The chief is even confused why someone with high rank wants information about you. Since we cannot refuse an order, I write a full report." Ramirez explain the situation to me and informed me what kind of things were happening behind the scenes. "Anyway, Ameguri-kun... Our authority isn't that high so we can't help you even if we wanted too... I even asked chief about things he knows but it appears that someone is puppeteering the high ranking official behind."

"I see... So it involves politics huh... Anyway, if they simply wanted information about me. It's nothing harmful, you don't have to worry about it andfocus on your daily lives. Who knows what kind of thing they will do to you if they found out that you were interfering with their plans." I give them a light warning and hinting I'm aware who is the person working behind the scenes.

"Do you know something Ameguri-kun?" Tachibana stare at me as if she is analyzing my thoughts. I don't want to get them involve so I express what's inside my head.

"I only have vague idea but I'm not certain about it. Anyway what you told me is certainly helpful. Thank you." I slightly lower my head to express my gratitude.

On the same time the conversation ended, we reaches our destination. "Is this your place?" Ramirez asked me a question and I simply nod at her. "You don't mind if we pay a visit right?"

"I guess..." I give her a reply and head outside of the car. I closes the door and look at them. Tachibana wave her hands at me and they drive away.

I stand still outside of the gate while in deep thoughts. "Someone who can make their chief move huh... Politics..." At first I thought it was my sister but Arthur told me, they investigate me before, it simply means I'm being followed by them and have me as their sources of information.

Which means it's the other third party that has been following me since my encounter with Melissa. "Is there someone who keep an eye on her? I don't know..." I stop talking to myself and take a deep sigh.

I open the gate and head into mini park in my garden. Since they always keep the house clean, I just casually sit down on bench and light some cigarette. I continue thinking the things earlier and create some theory about it.

"Third parties... Come to think of it Melissa told me that her family always get involved in military... could it be that she was being monitored since she left the house without the consent of her parents? But who is it? Someone who have feelings for her?" I keep asking my self question one after another.

At first I couldn't comprehend his motive but I came into realization later. "I get it now..." I muttered out loud and light another cigarette. "It's probably someone who values her the way like her parents. Perhaps relatives such as auntie or uncle which have access to police or military. They probably investigate Melissa and keep an eye on her... I see so that's how it is!" Realization came one after another. "I get it now..."

I'm starting to grasp what's happening behind the scenes. "The unknown third party which following me the night I meet Melissa and my sister guards the two of them were watching me during that time with two different reasons. The person who sent to check over Melissa came from her family relatives. They keep an eye on her without her parents consent and was supposed to save Melissa during the time she was getting assault or even make a contact with her if assault didn't happen. They didn't make a move until she was separated from her partner. And by coincidence, I arrive the stage they set up and intervened. Since they notices how I fight they probably got intrigued and starts to investigate me. It also solves the third party which following us when we deliver back Melissa to her house. On top of that when I sent them a message with an order to investigate the person who lives with Melissa, for some reason he disappeared as if someone get rid of him. And now they have their eyes set on me to see what kind of background I have, since I save Melissa and killed someone easily they probably thought I'm dangerous individual. However, I deliver Melissa back to her home safely and didn't say a word to her parents about what happened other than Melissa experiencing rape."

I relax my body on the chair and look at the night sky. "I'm lucky since the other third party stops following me before I attack six division otherwise they will probably dispose me too."

I put the filters into bin and stand up. "Since their only goal was to make sure Melissa was safe and get rid of the people who hurt her it doesn't affect me in some way. So I will put them at the back of my head and deal with them when the time comes."

I disregard the thoughts in my mind and head inside the house. I open the door and the sound of silence make my ears deaf. "It seems the three girls were asleep..." I talk to myself and quietly head upstairs. I reaches the door on my room but before opening it, I averted my gaze to Asuza's room and look at it for few minutes.

"It seems they have fun..." I muttered to myself and open the door on my bedroom. However, the moment I open the door unexpected things happen inside.

Chapter 9.1

My girlfriend Amane Shina, my older sister Asuza and Diane were inside the room. Asuza and Diane were lying on my bed and my girlfriend Amane was standing near the door frame with her arms cross.

She notices when I open the door and glare at me intensely, words aren't needed without a doubt trouble is bound to happen because the frustration was written all over her face.

"Where did you go at this late hour?" She asked me. Despite smiling I could tell she is frustrated.

"Ehm... Uhm..." I look away from her and starts to mumble nonsense words. I couldn't come up with a reason, so I just look away and keep on mumbling.

"Oh we can talk once you get inside..." She talk to me with gentle voice and take a step back, inviting me inside my own room.

I take a step forward and when I get inside, she locks the door and grab my shoulder. "Now speak..." This time she talk to me with furious voice, releasing an intimidating aura. It feels like I'm going to get eaten by wild animal.

"Uhm... I just went to the convenience store..." I look away from her and talk with normal tone of voice, which sound feminine for some reason.

When I stated my reason for going out late. Amane sniff the air around me as if her nose caught something. "What is that smell? Smoke?" After putting a guess, she look at me intensely. The same goes for Asuza and Diane, everyone approaches and focus their attention to me.

"Don't tell me..." With a look of disbelief on her face, Amane move in front of me and using her two hands she lightly slap both of sides of my hip at the same time. Then, she move her hands around my body as if searching for something. Her hand made a contact with hard object on my pocket. When that happens, she move it forcefully inside and pull out the contents.

"What is this!?" She clench the pack of cigarettes along with lighter on her fist and move it closer to my face. Despite knowing what kind of object was my possession, she still ask for the sake of it.

"Box of cigarettes and lighter..." I look at her with an expression of "it's normal for me" and stated what king of things she found on my pocket. I give an answer to her question because she asked me. However, it looks like my response make her angrier.

"I know what this is! I wanted know why are you smoking cigarettes!?" Now she started to yell at me.

I only look at her with a look of "I didn't do anything wrong" on my face and answer her question. "I think it's fun..."

"Fun...!? Fun you say!" She smack my head with her free hand. My body reacted on pain, I rub the top of my head with my hands and look at her dumbfounded. I certainly think there's nothing wrong with my actions and reasons for smoking.

"We just look away from you, hayama! And you started to do ridiculous things again... I certainly cannot leave you alone! I cannot trust you to be by yourself since you keep doing this like this! Who knows what will happen if we let you roam around..." Amane scolded me as if I'm her troublesome child that requires parental guidance. Her words were harsh and hurtful in some way especially the part where she stated "I cannot be trusted".

Without bathing an eye on her, I keep my head down and stare at the floor. Not saying a single word nor moving an inch. An awkward of silence hit upon us after she say those harsh words.

My sister Asuza, perhaps can no longer bear the sight of me getting scolded decided to intervened. "Do you think it's enough, Amane? He might be smoking cigarettes and doing things that can be considered as stupid but I think it's unnecessary to say those words against him. He has feelings to you know" With a look of concern on her face, she speak to my girlfriend.

Realizing her actions were too harsh, Amane immediately turn her gaze to me and apologize. "Hayama... I'm sorr-" She reaches her hand to me while apologizing, but before she finishes her words. I cut her off by turning my back on them and leaving the room.

I silently walk downstairs and get out of the house. What Amane stated might be considered as hurtful but it wasn't enough to hurt me in fact I don't feel anything when she scolded me, rather the words that mark on my mind during that time came from my sister, Asuza.

"He has feelings to you know..." I don't think that was the case. "Feelings? I never have those things called emotions..." I might know it's offensive words because they taught me it's offensive so, I avoided saying it. However, I never felt those words or to be more accurate I never considered it as offensive.

They say it hurts because they feel the pain from experience but I didn't feel anything and only know it hurts based on their experience, not mine. Some people will get frustrated after insulting words but that wasn't the case for me.

People might call me abnormal or special. Ever since I was born, I neither cry nor smile. No matter what kind of pain I experience, I only know it hurts but its not enough to make me cry. No matter what kind of good things they do, its not enough to make happy. They can disect me alive and I will only feel pain, I won't shed a single tear or even sent resentment towards them. They can give me everything I wanted, I won't smile for slightest.

Sadness and happiness are two sides of the same coin which lies behind the meaning of life. But what lies beyond me is nothing. There's no such a thing like emotions.

"Am I even alive?" I asked myself and stop walking at the street. I raise both of my hands and look at my palm. "If emotions were needed to be considered as human being then, what am I...? a monster?"

If I am a monster only capable of tormenting and slaughtering individual then it's pointless to dig things any deeper. "Happiness and sadness, the true meaning behind life..." I could search for decades or even century if I'm still alive but I won't be able to find things that doesn't exist.

"It's been ages of searching and I haven't produced a good results." I clench my fist and continue speaking. "I'm going to give up chasing after those things..." I'm throwing the towel since search is no longer necessary. I already have an answer before the search begins but I stubbornly believe that such a thing truly exist. "I wonder what I'm going to do from now on?"

The only things I'm capable off are act and imitation, I follow the script written for me and act to please them like some entertainer. My reasons for living and doing things, it was all fake. "Justice? Love? Friendship? Those things didn't happen because I wanted too, it happens due script..."

I'm only acting based on what they expected me to do. If that was the case then... "I will probably continue the show... However, the characters will be different since I'm giving up." I muttered out loud and put my palm on my face as if I wore an invisible mask. With my hands covering my face, I wipe it down and continue.

"You should sleep now, Ameguri Hayama. The thing you are looking for doesn't exist... Since you are someone who cannot lie and even do anything by himself. Just let me do the acting for you, I promise you a better ending where you can live with emotions, inside your head. HUA HUA HUA! " I let out sinister sounds of laughter like some evil guy from the movies.

In that moment, I started to close my eyes. It feels like my consciousness was being drag into abyss where light doesn't exist, an eternal darkness. I just let my body sink and slowly forget everything that happens to me today since I'm not going back... I will die in suffocation a fitting death for monster.

Few minutes have passed, I open my eyes and scrub my hair. "Hmmm... I feel like I'm asleep for decades." I muttered out oud and stretches my body. "Anyway, it's time to make a move... Uhm... What is my name again..." I put my index finger on my chin and started to think. A light bulb pops up on my head, and I pound my palm after coming into realization. "I see... It's Utsubyo Kanashi."

I joyfully leave the town and head into a specific location, walking for few minutes. I arrive at my destination. "So this is the place huh..." I look up at the billboard. It says "24/7 hair salon". I open the glass sliding door and head inside.

"Welcome, what can I do for you?" A woman on her forties, greeted me as I walk. She guided me to the chair with her hands and I sit down happily.

"I wanted to cut my hair, please make it short and neat. I also wanted to dye it, make it white." I told her what I wanted as costumer. She gave me a pleasant smile and starts to cut my hair.

[Inside Ameguri's house]

"Do you think we should search for him?" Diane asked them a question. "It's been half hour since he left." Despite asking, neither of the girls she was talking to put up a word. They just stand still and waited for him to come back.

"What ever..." Feeling like they won't make a move. Diane stand up from the couch and starts to walk on her way outside.

"Where are you going?" Asuza speaks to her making Diane frozen in her tracks.

She turn around and give her a reply. "I'm going to search for him..." Diane look away from Asuza and continue on her tracks.

"If you wander around aimlessly and something happen to you-" Asuza started to argue with Diane but she say something which make her mouth shut.

"If somethings happens to me? Do you think I'm so weak that I won't be able to defend myself? I might lose to Hayama but our strength is not that far apart." I'd say if he is at scale of 100, mine would be 80-85.

"Just stay here for now. I already asked my guards to search for him. If he comes back later and you aren't here he might go out of his way to search for you." Asuza spoke before Diane could open the door.

She stops reaching the door knob and head back into the living room. Perhaps, thinking the best choice would be to wait for Hayama to come back.

Anyway, they silently waited for him for an hour... An hour becomes hours, hours becomes days, and days eventually becomes a week. However, neither Hayama nor Asuza's guard made an appearance.