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Death by Cake

These books are works of fiction. Names, characters, places, and events are either products of the author's imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual events, locales, or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental.

No part of these books may be stored, reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means without express written permission of the author.

Notes from the Author:

This book was first written in 2009, but this series has been changed to be more engaging to a general audience. While this first book has little mention of it, there is something contagious in the air. It's more prevalent and plot intensive by book 3. This part hasn't been changed and does not have anything to do with the 2021 pandemic. It's just integral to the whole series and cannot be changed.

This series contains some tongue in cheek type humor but it also features people dying and being murdered of all ages, including children. The scenes are not heavily dripping in description. Its biggest changes were language and sexual inferences. It also contains a lot of name-calling from heroes to villains.

Also note, that while this book and book 2 seem to dissuade from unhealthy food? It wasn't written by a vegan/vegetarian and is not here to change your own mind. I actually eat meat/junk food/dessert all the time, and book 3 will throw a twist into this way of the audiences thinking anyway.

Chapter 1: Dropped Off Stranger

Lost Secret's sign was clearly written by a child. It's L and E were backwards. Shari Kari expected no less since the town was full of children. No adult on Earth would be found there, except visiting parents, and apparently her.

She heard her sister Tracy mutter a warning, some repeated instructions about where she would reside, then heard the wheels squeal off. Shari saw the suitcase her sister had stood beside her and dragged up a sigh along with it. Shari never had any problems compared to Tracy, but she had just been informed she had a hit on her. Which was the only reason she was in Lost Secret.

Safety.

Tracy said she'd take care of it and refused to tell Shari much. Shari didn't know how to feel about that, as words with Tracy were never what they seemed. The word 'babysitter', 'I love you extra special', and 'just some things' were never sincere. What could 'hit' mean though?

Anyone else could demand an explanation, but Shari had no room to quarrel. Tracy was in charge of her, always. Finances, relationships, career, everything.

"One thousand one, one thousand two, one thousand three," a woman chanted, her bosoms moving up and down as she jumped roped with two other women. Shari, at first, almost laughed. Women being goofy or nostalgic happened at certain intervals in their lives. Boys and girls alike rushed by with a cloud of laughter.

Her mouth found itself being tucked upward. Youth. She continued to walk, knowing her new rental property would not be far. After such a strange day she could go for a nap. This hit had to be Tracy's fault, and hopefully it would be cleared up soon.

"No, no, leave me alone," a little girl yelled as she ran past Shari. Shari looked back toward a man chasing her. A rugged man in overalls? Before Shari could even think of what to do next, the little girl began laughing. "Can't catch me, Benji," the little girl laughed again as she darted on the other side of Shari.

"No fair," the brisk baritone voice spoke as he crossed his arms and stomped his foot like a spoiled child. "No fair using people not in the game, Rosa, I'm tellin'!"

Telling? At that point, she remembered the women that had been jump roping and acting like children. She turned and examined more of the new town she'd be living in. Children far and wide, played in the trees and in the roads ahead, running from house to house. Lost Secret was nothing but a playground for everyone, she knew that before she came. However, the word everyone actually meant more than just children?

Adults acted like children.

"You normal?"

Shari jumped as a finger poked in the middle of her back. She turned around and saw a man who didn't seem to embody the young vibe everyone around him did. He wore a black suit with a red tie. His face was stoic and stood out in the middle of the playing crowd. He had a small and pudgy side to him, but not much more than she did.

"You look normal," he said in a gruff manner as his eyes trailed up and down her. His gaze felt more curious than predatory. "Well dressed, and no stupid bows in your hair. You're a visitor, new to Lost Secret."

"Yes," Shari admitted. "I'm a new resident. Temporary."

The gruff man almost smiled, but not quite. "A new resident? There are no new residents that stick around unless you're under the age of ten. Or if you are leaving sniveling kids behind for me to deal with." He cracked his fingers one at a time as he spoke.

Not a winning attitude. If she had kids, this is the last place they would end up. "I'm sorry, who are you?" Shari had to ask.

The gruff man stood straight with honor and pleasure peeking through his expression. "Timothy Varmen. Only sane person in Lost Secret."

"Timmers Varmint," a few of the kids laughed out loud as they pointed at him. "Timmers, Timmers."

"Varmen, Timothy Varmen," Timothy corrected them as he looked at Shari again. "I didn't see you drop off your kids, so why are you here?"

Just arrived and Shari already had a problem. Right now, information was best avoided. "I thought this would be a peaceful community."

"Then turn back around," Timothy twirled his left index finger in a circle, "because you made a mistake. This place is anything but peaceful."

"I'm aware of that now," Shari said briefly looking around again. "So, Mister Varmen, have you been a longtime resident?"

"Mister?" Timothy chuckled. A strange, unpleasant choking chuckle, like when someone eats and laughs, but gets food caught in their throat. He was clearly not in the best medical shape. His tough stance eased as he answered her question. "I grew up here, left, and came back." His nose twitched with disgust. "I had hoped things changed, but it's the same pathetic excuse for a town."

Shari leaned against her cane, her attention focused on Mister Varmen. It seemed someone had agreed with her about how atrocious these dumping grounds had been. "I agree Mister Varmen. It isn't right, and children should have parents around, or adoptive guardians." She wiggled her fingers against her cane, "By the way, the adults around here -"

"Grew up here, never left," Timothy finished. "Sad fate, so you should turn back around and leave. This town isn't fit for normies." Shari cocked her eyebrow up as he continued. "Normal people. Temporary kids that are here back and forth are tempies, and the ones who live here forever are permies. Better get used to that lingo."

"It's too late, I've got a place I'm renting," Shari said, "and besides anything's better than Calibri." A slight upward crook graced her face. "At least there won't be any Adventurers." Mister Varmen gestured toward the middle of the town, where an out-of-place tower resided. She lost the crook in her face. "An Adventurer?" The last thing she needed was one of those cliché heroes nosing around in her business. She wasn't an Adventurer groupie, someone who sighed and had posters of their buff naked chests hanging in their rooms. Adventurers were worse than rock stars when it came to popularity.

Or modesty.

"No, just a Paladin," Timothy said as Shari's grip on her cane became loose in relief. An Adventurer fought considerable danger, saved women and they were even commissioned to save the world. A Paladin stopped people from damaging trees, breaking small laws and polluting rivers. Some were even scientists, trying to find cures for diseases or growing safer crops.

"Paladins are well respected," Shari said. "Is the Paladin a scientist, or considering the area, a counselor for neglect?"

Timothy seemed to gag. "No way. Zeke is the one keeping the residents safe. He's the reason Lost Secret exists in this form. If anything happens to anyone, he's fired."

"Oh," Shari's mouth twitched up. Even better. "His name's Zeke, and he's just the town babysitter?"

"Yes, yes, that's it," Timothy clapped his hands at her statement. "He's a babysitter. Oh, I am so calling him that next time, I can just see his face, its priceless. Nyah, nyah, nyah, nyah, nyah." His antics and excitement stopped, most likely from seeing her face. "Sorry. Habit-er-handicap." He covered his mouth and cleared his throat. "This place is a contagious disease. I don't recommend sticking around."

Shari shrugged, "Look, if it's better than Calibri City and as long as I can get…" She leaned off her cane as she tried to cover her mouth with her left hand. "…some rest." She noticed the curious look on his face. No use hiding it. "I have a rare condition, so I don't exercise or get out much. I'll leave it at that."

"Really?" Timothy reached in his pocket and pulled out an asthma inhaler. "We have something in common," he said as he twirled the inhaler around his finger. "I like you better by the minute."

Shari tried to keep a blush from striking her cheeks, but she felt herself becoming warm. Few men paid much attention in such a way. Shape wise, she was okay, but far from perfect. "Well, thank you. Timothy, was it?"

"Yes. Timothy." He covered his top lip with his bottom. She could tell he was almost as excited as her. "Miss, or Mrs.?"

"Shari Kari," She reached out her hand as if she could grab her mistake. "Oh, Miss Shari Kari."

"Oh, well Miss Shari Kari," Timothy chuckled his strange choking laugh again. "If you're stuck here, and insist upon staying, then I welcome you." He placed his inhaler back in its pocket. "Perhaps we could even become good companions while you're here?"

Companions? Shari placed a hand on her face. He moved even faster than she expected. "Well, you see, Mister Varmen, I mean uh, Timothy? I've recently got out of a relationship. That doesn't mean it's a no forever, but we could start as friends? I usually don't move so fast."

Timothy's eyebrow rose as he seemed to regard her response. "Okay."

"Okay. We could meet for a friendly movie," Shari suggested. "Timothy. Mister Varmen. I will see you around then." She walked away quickly but politely. That position became quite uncomfortable. She was never right with guys, having never actually dated anyone that she picked out herself.

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