59 Chapter Fifteen: Mid-Terms Yet Again

Over the course of the next couple of weeks, several changes occurred. The first was that all students switched to their winter uniforms. The girls' uniform remained nearly the same, with the only difference being the sleeves were now long instead of short. As for the guys, they were required to wear a navy blue blazer that match the same blue on the girls' skirts. And as per usual, most of the students complained about how late the switch was. Being so far north, it had already been on the colder side in Iwanai, so the fact that it took until mid-October to make the uniform change was one that confused and irritated many.

The next thing to affect the student body was that a certain time of year had come once more. Mid-terms were now just around the corner, getting students to shift into study mode. The hallways were buzzing with a mixture of "I'm not worried at all!" and "I'm doomed!"

However, while changes went through the students of Iwanai Municipal High School, there was one change that struck only an individual. During these past couple of weeks, she'd been fraught with lingering worries, doubts and fears. With a friendship teetering on one end and a love interest tipping toward the side she didn't want, Haruna Endo's mood kept worsening.

It wasn't as if she was always mad or bothered. Really, it was just that Haruna was in a constant state of unease. Michi and Chiyo had gotten closer recently while Haruna was still in limbo with the gal, adding more to her already building worries that Kanako was going to get swept away by Akio. All of these concerns coursing through her mind made it very difficult to focus on studying.

She knew there were simple solutions to her problems, but as is the case with most people, Haruna kept letting her own pride get in the way and instead kept opting to let herself overthink everything. Doing that did her no good, as it only served to make her unease rise. Perhaps the real problem was that Haruna had been doing nothing but thinking recently. She thought she had had a wave of momentum to ride with Kanako, but just as soon as she had thought that, it had been dashed away by Kanako herself (even if it was unintentional). Since then, Haruna had done little, and it was because of that that she took yet another hit.

In the time leading up to mid-terms, Haruna had thought about asking Kanako to study together, but at the same time she went to ask, Akio had beat her to the punch. The pair then ended up going to the library, with Haruna following them. It felt childish to do such a thing, but she couldn't help it. Part of her thought about jumping out at joining them in an attempt to ruin whatever plan Akio had. But for some reason, she hadn't done that. Haruna ended up just watching them. Nothing really noteworthy happened, but just seeing Akio and Kanako get along so well put Haruna's stomach in knots.

There had been other moments recently as well. Akio getting Kanako alone for lunch, convincing her to walk home with him while Haruna was at her conditioning practice for her club, and once he had even surprised her with a random gift. It was clear to Haruna that Akio was stepping up his efforts. She knew that she should respond in kind, but instead, she just kept letting it go on. Haruna didn't have a clue what she should do, and it was the feeling of being lost that reminded Haruna just how much she needed Chiyo.

Without the gal by her side, events between Kanako and Akio would just keep happening while Haruna stood still. If what had happened recently was any indication, Akio would just keep upping his game until Haruna was left far behind. That had become all too clear after something Haruna had witnessed one day after school.

On a day that both Haruna and Kanako had club activities, Haruna had been on her way back into the school to change into her uniform. After, she would follow the usual routine of stopping by Kanako's clubroom and picking her up. Then as the two of them went to leave the school, Akio would join them. It had all become pretty normal, but one day, just as Haruna had started walking down the hall, she heard familiar voices. "Is that...Kanako?" she wondered.

Making a turn and coming to a stop, Haruna nearly froze before ducking back behind the corner. There at the end of the hallway was Kanako, all alone with Akio. "What are they doing?" she thought. For the most part, it looked like the two of them were just talking, but the conversation seemed awfully friendly. Akio and Kanako were standing fairly close together, with the girl beaming and the guy appearing to be having a genuinely good time. Seeing Akio act like that was especially off-putting to Haruna. "He doesn't even actually like her does he?" she thought. She remembered all of the moments she had seen so far that Akio had looked not so much interested in Kanako as much as he seemed uncomfortable. "If it bothers him so much, then why is he acting like that?"

Unfortunately, watching from a distance could only tell Haruna so much, and she still needed to change clothes. So reluctantly, she had left the scene behind, and by the time she had gotten back, the two were waiting for Haruna like usual. She had nearly made a comment about what she had seen, but then thought better of it. "If Miyashita-kun thinks I was spying on them, he'll never let me forget it," she thought. Plus, it felt like so much of what Akio did with Kanako was intentionally done to provoke Haruna in one way or another. "It's a little hard to believe he'd plan something like a private conversation with Kanako and know I'd see it..."

Of course, whether it had been planned or not, there was no denying that the whole scene Haruna had witnessed had looked a lot like flirting. That alone was enough to really push her into a panic. "If Miyashita-kun is actually getting serious, then..." she thought. If Akio really did want to go out with Kanako and was making a real effort to win her heart, then Haruna knew she wouldn't stand a chance. "With the way things are now, Kanako would pick Miyashita-kun easily..."

Just that reminder made Haruna's heart hurt, perhaps more than usual. After feeling so good before, it felt like now only more and more worry was seeping in. It wasn't to the point that Haruna felt like she had already lost, but with each action that Akio took, Haruna believed she was dropping further and further back in the race. "Not that it's a competition, but..." But with Akio getting more aggressive, Haruna couldn't help but wonder just how much time she had left.

Because of Akio, Haruna had found herself thinking about a question she hated: if Akio confessed to Kanako, would she say yes? The answered seemed obvious, and just imagining it made Haruna feel like her heart was being shattered. If even the thought of the two of them getting together was enough to draw out such a dramatic reaction from Haruna, would she even be able to be around them should Akio and Kanako actually become a couple? Would she start skipping school? Transfer? Move? "...Maybe that's a bit much," Haruna sighed.

Haruna had never been one to believe she was weak-willed. It was simply her lack of experience that kept her from giving her own confession. If Akio and Kanako became a couple, she was sure she'd find a way to live with it somehow. But, knowing her own faults could be the cause for such a situation is what really dragged her spirit down. "If only I could just say it..." Haruna thought dejectedly. If she could just say she was in love with Kanako, at the very least, the other girl would have to give it some thought. She'd be unable to choose Akio so easily. Kanako would have to at least consider Haruna's feelings. Maybe it wouldn't go the way Haruna wanted and maybe she'd come out of it with a broken heart, but at least she could say she tried.

However, at the moment, Haruna couldn't even say that much. There was her lack of experience for one, but the other main factor was one that she had yet to truly overcome. While Haruna could now accept that she was in love with another girl, confessing those feelings was another obstacle entirely. It was a scenario that Haruna had envisioned many times.

How would Kanako react to hearing another girl say she loved her romantically? Would she be confused? Disgusted? ...Happy? There was no way to know. For as long as Haruna had known Kanako, the girl had only ever shown interest in one person ever. No other guy (and certainly no other girl) had ever landed on Kanako's love radar. Whatever interest she might have in anyone else was impossible to know. On the one hand, that meant Haruna had a chance. If Kanako had never looked at anyone other than Akio romantically, then that meant she wasn't turning people down left and right. She might stop and think about a confession she received or maybe even accept it.

On the other hand, because of how narrowed her vision was, there was the possibility that Kanako would refuse to consider anyone except Akio. After all, she's been in love with the boy for most of her life. Anyone trying to get over that mountain had a long journey ahead of them, let alone a girl like Haruna. And to make her own situation worse, Akio knew about Kanako's feelings. All in all, the boy was one move away from putting Haruna in checkmate.

Stopping her train of thought, Haruna vigorously shook her head as she sat in her living room, sending her long black hair flitting from side to side. "I have to stop thinking like that. I still have a chance. I mean, it's not like I haven't made any progress at all," she told herself. "Besides, I should really focus on studying." In a couple of days, mid-terms would begin, and Haruna was one of many in preparation mode. But for as hard as she tried, she couldn't shake her worries completely.

Those same worries slipped into her ability to focus, and by the time mid-terms arrived, Haruna was in no state of mind to be test-taking. Of course, life wouldn't be so kind as to take that into account, meaning that the tests would go on regardless. When the first one was set in front of her, Haruna picked up her pencil and began trying to fill in the answers. Multiple choice didn't provide too much of a challenge, but Haruna felt like she couldn't be sure if she had just been guessing or not. When it came to fill in the blank or essay questions, every line of thought Haruna tried derailed. "Damn it..." she muttered under her breath. "What the hell is going on with me?" she wondered.

Unlike her test questions, she knew the answer. And yet, she asked herself anyways, hoping that maybe a different answer would present itself. If one did, Haruna felt like it would make everything a lot easier. But that was a convenient wish, and one that would not come true. Answer sheet after answer sheet and paper after paper, Haruna jotted down her responses in a daze, her attention held captive by problems found nowhere on her mid-terms.

By the time the final bell rang, Haruna felt entirely exhausted. It had taken all of her efforts to maintain even half of her focus, and still she was sure that a strong possibility existed that her grades would come back with nearly or all failing marks. Her parents would certainly be mad, but honestly, that felt like a small concern. "I just wish I could at least come up with a plan to counter whatever Miyashita-kun does," Haruna thought. For a moment, she considered going to Chiyo, but yet again a mixture of pride and stubbornness stopped her. "...I should try to figure this out on my own," Haruna decided.

*****

Haruna was not the only girl having trouble giving 100 percent of her focus to her tests. As she worked on the first one placed on her desk, Kanako Nakatomi found herself continuously trying to understand recent events.

She wasn't oblivious to her surroundings, at least she didn't think so. That was why it seemed so strange to her that Akio had been approaching her more and more. Naturally, the first thought that came to mind was, "Is he falling for me?" Kanako wanted to believe that was the case, but part of her didn't think that was quite it. It was certainly true that Akio was around more. Inviting Kanako to eat lunch together was a new development, and she had even been getting to walk home with Akio alone. She liked walking with Haruna, but being able to be with just Akio gave her a different feeling.

Taking into account how her birthday had went, it felt possible that Akio was now really making an effort. Little by little, Kanako and Akio were getting closer, closing that distance that had inadvertently opened up once they had entered high school. Kanako hoped that effort was intended to be for her and her alone, but that almost felt like too much optimism. "It was only last summer that he seemed pretty against the idea..." Kanako remembered Akio being quick to point out that their summer outing wasn't a date. On her birthday, however, he had done nearly the opposite. And now, considering how much time they were spending together, it seemed only natural to Kanako for her to draw such a romantic conclusion.

Eating lunch together and walking home together had become little things that Kanako had been taking great joy in. As long as Akio kept reaching out his hand to her, she'd keep taking it. The other day was a good example, as Akio had taken Kanako out to a hallway a short distance away from most other students. As it had turned out, it hadn't been for anything of great importance. He just felt like talking. For Kanako though, even that was enough.

It hadn't taken long for their conversation to shift from present to past as they reminisced. They talk about all sorts of fond memories, laughing about a lot of their old stories. Kanako enjoyed it a lot, and over time, she noticed that the physical distance between them had closed, placing boy and girl mere centimeters apart. It made Kanako smile even more than she had been. "I'm doing it!" she thought happily. "Akio-kun is getting closer to me!"

Seeing Akio having a good time as well, Kanako was convinced that it was due to her efforts. Surely, with a little more time, she'd be the one in Akio's heart. But, while they were both clearly having a good time, there had been a moment that had caught Kanako's eye. Briefly, Akio had looked away from her and over her shoulder. His eyes had squinted slightly, and then Kanako swore she had seen a small smirk before he went back to normal. She had no idea what that could've meant, but she also didn't bother trying to figure it out. In that moment, thanks to the power of love, Kanako was blind to anything that wasn't Akio's presence.

While taking her mid-terms, Kanako kept thinking about that moment and others, along with her own feelings. She tried putting those feelings aside for a while as she tried to take a test, but she couldn't even wipe the smile from her face. "He's taking an interest in me. He has to be!" Kanako thought. Despite her own self-warnings, she threw caution to the wind and submerged herself in the belief that Akio was falling in love with her.

"...wait," Kanako stopped, staring at the paper in front of her. "Huh?" She flipped over her answer sheet. Every answer was A. "Oh no!" she exclaimed internally, luckily managing to prevent the shout from escaping her lips. Checking the time, she saw there wasn't much left. As quick as she could, she began changing answers. "I can't keep my head in the clouds right now! I need to focus!" she scolded herself.

However, even with her best efforts, Kanako couldn't stop her mind from drifting back to the boy she had longed for for so long. For years, Kanako had held onto feelings for Akio. She had never been the type to say, "As long as he's happy, I don't need to confess," but she had never felt like she needed to be in a hurry either. Surely, when the time was right, she'd confess and they'd become a couple. That was what Kanako had believed. There had been no urgency or worry that Akio would get taken.

That is, until one day in junior high. It had been purely an accident, but Kanako had happened to be around a part of the school that most people didn't go to. And it was there, when she looked out the window, that she saw Akio and a girl talking to each other. Kanako hadn't been able to tell what they were talking about, but the first thing that had come to mind was a confession. As it turned out, it had been nothing of the sort, but to Kanako, the idea of giving her own confession had rocketed up her priority list.

Then, after endless conversations with Michi, Kanako had finally felt prepared enough to tell the boy her true feelings. Going with the classic plan of leaving a note in a shoe locker, Kanako had gone to wait behind the school for Akio. Of course, to her surprise, she had met Haruna there instead, and events unfolded that led to the two of them becoming friends again. Kanako was grateful for that, but a part of her was still annoyed that things hadn't gone as planned. However, thanks to Akio's recent actions, Kanako had renewed hope, and it was a hope she was putting a lot of faith in.

"Time's up!" a teacher's voice called. Kanako looked down and breathed a sigh of relief. Somehow, she had been able to answer every question without paying attention. "...but I actually don't know if they're right do I?" she thought, now wishing she had been trying harder to prevent herself from daydreaming.

Unfortunately for Kanako, this process kept repeating. For as much as she wanted to focus on her mid-terms, she couldn't seem to stop think about Akio. Part of her felt like that wasn't a bad thing, but she knew that was just her feelings talking. Realistically, she knew she needed to keep her pencil to the paper and make sure she passed. "I really don't want to get lecture by mom and dad..." she thought, remembering a time when that had happened once. Her parents weren't strict with her, but that didn't mean free reign. Freedom came with effort, so if Kanako didn't do as well as she should, then it was possible she'd have to spend more time studying, which meant less time spent with Akio.

"We've finally been getting reconnected, and we're making progress. I don't want to lose him again, or Haruna," Kanako thought resolutely. But in that moment, when Kanako thought of the girl she had grown up with, she paused. "Haruna..." she repeated.

Suddenly, an intensely sharp pain shot through Kanako's chest. "Nngh!" she let out quietly, wincing. "Nakatomi-san, are you okay?" the teacher asked. "I-I'm... fine..." she breathed. The pain had quickly passed, but the memory of it was very fresh. It was a pain that spoke to Kanako. It spoke of loss. Of sadness. Of loneliness. It reminded Kanako of how much she had missed Haruna when they had been apart. Just the thought of losing her again almost felt like too much.

It had been such an idle thought, one simply meant to help Kanako focus. But instead, it had backfired, dredging up feelings of the past and slamming them into Kanako's heart one after the other. "No... stop... I don't want that..." she thought. Quickly, she tried to overwrite those old feelings with new ones. Her current memories with Haruna rose to the surface.

The first time Haruna had said Kanako's name in years. The time they had had tea and talked into the night, with Haruna leaving with a lovely smile. The night of Kanako's birthday as they watched the stars on the pier. Each moment helped to ease Kanako's mind. Bit by bit, her anxieties lowered, until they at least felt more manageable.

But perhaps Kanako had underestimated her past feelings. Their roots were years long and could not be so easily forgotten. Instead, they remained, permeating the corners of Kanako's mind. The unease they created from just that small amount alone made Kanako nervous. "It's okay... She's not going anywhere... We're friends again..." Kanako thought to herself, but it didn't seem to be working.

Suddenly, Kanako's pencil dropped out of her hand. It fell onto the desk and rolled, but stopped short of falling over the edge. Staring at her hand, Kanako could see it shaking. "Haruna..." she squeaked out at the hand. It was the left one, and it was often the one that Haruna held. In that moment, Kanako found herself wanting for nothing more than for Haruna to hold it once more.

The next thing Kanako knew, there was a shadow over her desk. Looking up, she saw the female teacher standing next to her. "Nakatomi-san, are you sure you're alright?" she asked with a look of concern on her face. Brought out of her fears, Kanako took a deep breath in before letting it out. "Y-Yes. I'm fine," Kanako said with a weak smile. It didn't sound entirely convincing, but the teacher believed her anyways.

Once she walked away, Kanako slipped back into thought. "...What was that?" she wondered. The nerves she had felt just seconds before had disappeared, but there was no forgetting the pleading wish that Kanako had felt inside of her that had so badly wanted Haruna by her side at that moment. She was confused. After thinking about Akio so much and her feelings for him, it seemed like it would've made more sense for her to think of his name in times of trouble. "...but instead, I thought of Haruna," Kanako thought. "What... does that mean?"

Faced with a very important question for Kanako's heart, the girl herself wanted to look for the answer, but the current time wouldn't allow it. Sitting in front of her were physical questions with concrete answers, and they had to be taken care of first. Kanako sighed. "I guess I'll have to think about it later..." she decided, finally getting back to her test.

*****

At long last, the week finally concluded. Students rejoiced throughout the building when the final test was completed, and they were granted free time from lunch onward for that Friday. Many students roamed about, gathering in various classrooms with their friends and discussing their predictions for how they did while they ate. It was fun for many, but it was also impossible to deny that it felt a little more crowded than usual. With the weather officially getting too cold for comfort, those that usually ate outside were now inside.

The regulars of the outside group (Haruna, Chiyo and Jasmine) had decided to gather in a corner of an offshoot hallway. This hallway only had two doors in it. One was a janitor's closet, and the other was an electrical room. Located on the second floor, the three girls were joined by three others as they sat in their winter lunch spot.

"Geez, I'm so happy those tests are over! I thought they'd never end!" Itsuki said loudly as she flopped backwards. "Yes, I'm happy too. This mid-term's math test was particular difficult," Mayu said. "I'm just hoping I passed," Jasmine said plainly. "I bet I'll beat you in scores this time!" Chiyo said confidently. "Well if you're that confident, then I'm probably fine," Jasmine said nonchalantly. "Why're you so mean Jas-chin?!"

Noticing two people hadn't commented yet, Chiyo turned to them. "What about you two?" she asked. Haruna and Kanako both jumped. "I... probably bombed it," Haruna said, hanging her head. "I-I'm too afraid to see my test results..." Kanako moaned. "That bad huh?" Chiyo commented. "Well, whatevs! At least it's over now!" "I guess ignorance really is bliss," Jasmine said sarcastically, directing her remark at her fellow gal. Chiyo puffed her cheeks. "Stop being meeaaan!' she complained, bopping Jasmine's arm a few times with her fists.

While Jasmine ignored Chiyo's "attack," she looked over at Mayu. "Oh. Mayu-chi, hold still," she said suddenly, picking up a napkin. "Hm?" Mayu let out, turning to face her. "Aaand, there. All clean," Jasmine said with a soft smile as she wiped Mayu's cheek. The girl in glasses went slightly pink at Jasmine's actions while the rest of the group gaped. "T-Thank you," Mayu said, appearing to be a little embarrassed. "Huh? Jas-chin, since when are you so...doting?" Chiyo asked, trying to find the right word to describe what she saw. "Or more like, since when are you two so close?"

"Are we close?" Jasmine asked Mayu. "Huh? Why are you asking me?" she said. Jasmine turned back to Chiyo and shrugged. "I don't know. Maybe it's more like I wanna take care of her." "Take care of her?" Chiyo repeated. "Yeah. She reminds me of like, a cute bunny or something," Jasmine explained with an odd sense of pride. "B-Bunny?!" Mayu exclaimed, surprised to hear someone describe her like that. "No good, Mayu-chi?" Jasmine asked, looking at the girl next to her with sultry eyes. "Well... I suppose it's fine," Mayu said, averting her eyes as she felt like she couldn't say no.

As lunch went on, the conversation was lively, and it seemed like it was the first time in a while that there wasn't a ton of tension hanging in the air. It was still awkward between Haruna and Chiyo, and Haruna still wanted to ask Kanako about what she had seen the other day when she saw Kanako and Akio alone in the hallway, but all issues seemed to get pushed aside. It was only when Chiyo got up that the talking stopped.

"Hm? Where're ya goin' Chiyo?" Jasmine asked. "I'm gonna go look for Mi-chan," she said happily before leaving to look for the only girl not present. As Chiyo walked away, Jasmine shook her head. "That girl..." she mumbled, but if anyone heard her, no one bothered to ask what she meant by what she said.

*****

With all tests done and most clubs cancelled for the day, students were free to leave when they wanted. Naturally, most decided to leave as soon as possible, and it was shortly after lunch that the group of Haruna, Kanako, Jasmine, Mayu and Itsuki began to head out as well. Reaching the gate, they split off in three separate directions, with Haruna and Kanako going one, Mayu and Itsuki going the opposite and Jasmine going somewhere in the middle of the two.

"It sure is cloudy today," Haruna said as they began walking home. "Y-Yeah. I didn't think there was anything about rain in the forecast, but maybe they were wrong," Kanako said, staring up at the sky. Then, within a minute after leaving school grounds, a drop hit the side of the road Kanako and Haruna were walking on. There was one, then another and then another, until finally cold water began to cascade onto the city of Iwanai.

End of Chapter Fifteen.