Chapter 5

Chapter 5

Brittany -

I didn't know how to describe the feelings battling inside me.

The few moments spent in the simple bathroom felt like ages slowly passing.

I opened the door and stepped out to find her with her head down and arms loosely crossed.

‘So you invited me to coffee, and drove me out here, because you want to beat me....to hurt me?’

Dani: ‘Will you please sit? I have no intention of touching you unless you say it's ok. I messed this up, I let my attraction influence me, so that...’

‘So that you could be some sick predator?’

Dani: ‘Only to fully consenting prey.’

She wasn't being defensive shockingly and her words held confidence with mild humor.

Dani: ‘You can eat on the other side of the room if you'd like, but would you please eat?’

She took a sip of my wine and picked up my fork, taking a bite of my food.

Dani: ‘It isn't poison. I wouldn't waste good food or wine for that matter. I might like some twisted stuff, but I'm still the person you were talking and laughing with all afternoon.’

Part of me felt like I really might be over exaggerating, but part of me felt like I wasn't exaggerating enough.

Then, there was a part of me that was oddly still curious and intrigued.

‘You still didn't answer me, about wanting to hurt me...’

I walked over and just placed my hand on the back of my chair.

Dani: ‘I don't really know you well enough yet, but if I had to guess, if you were ok with it I think it could be something we both enjoy.’

‘That's....but you....’

She reached over catching me off guard, pulling my chair just a bit then pushing it with her foot and giving me a sideways nod.

I sat down and pushed food around on my plate.

Dani: ‘Ok be honest, do you want to kiss me?’

I started studdering and acting awkward.

Dani: ‘I'm going to take that as a yes even if there would be conditions. Like if you knew me better, or if you knew I was genuinely interested, and if you could trust me. The initial physical desire is there though, but I'm willing to bet you've been hurt. You've been used to satisfy others physical desires and been burned. So now you promise yourself there has to be more. That you deserve more. The thing is you deserve so much more than you've ever been given, but have been forced to accept....fuck!’

I felt tears form in my eyes and brought my hands to hide my face.

She put hands softly on my leg and must have read my face as I moved my hands.

Despite everything that had been circling around in my head all I wanted was a hug right then.

She stood beside me and held me firmly with my face to her chest.

I felt things I hid in the back of my mind forcing themselves to the surface.

It wasn't that she said anything too deep, but it was so true.

I sat alone in that bakery week after week because being hurt like I had made me prefer being alone.

I knew it was easy to guess any girl had been hurt or been given reasons to be guarded, but the way she spoke hit me just right.

She spoke like she wasn't just talking about me even, but like she spoke from personal experience.

I didn't realize I was really crying until she moved.

She just bent over and scooped me up.

I heard her mumble to me so I held my breath.

Dani: ‘I'll put you down if you want. I didn't mean to go there and get deep. I couldn't see you cry and do nothing.’

I just shook my head as I felt us going down onto the couch.

She made calming sounds and lightly bounced me in her lap.

She started whispering quietly, and slid her hands up the back of my shirt gently scratching.

‘I-I should go, um, wa-wash my face. I'm an ugly crier. I should....’

She pushed the messy hair from my face.

Dani: ‘Sweetheart, you are absolutely beautiful. I've seen you many Thursday nights now and I'm not sure you could be anything but entirely gorgeous. I know my timing is awful and my delivery is worse, but unless you stop me I'm about to kiss you.’