42 9.4 The Man In The Mirror

So there is good news and bad news.

The good news is Stanley managed to get a reservation for next week Saturday which gave him adequate time to do some research. The bad news is it turns out the dinner was going to be a bigger hassle than he thought, specifically the preparations for said dinner was going to be more of a hassle than he thought, much more.

He actually Googled fancy restaurant just to get an idea of what to expect but what he found began a downward spiral into the abyss that is the art of fine dining. The first thing he learned was that the technical terms for fancy restaurants were 'fine dining' restaurant or 'white tablecloth' restaurant because disposable napkins were for peasants. If Stanley sounded unreasonable about this topic it's because he had a copy of the restaurant's menu.

That is a lot of money to spend for something he could have for a fraction of the cost if he bought it in a store and have Ezraphel cook it. He's also pretty sure the quality would be the same too but since he never actually ate at a 5 Star restaurant that has yet to be seen. That's part of the reason why he wasn't calling this off but let's be honest the only reason he was going through with it was because of Ezraphel.

This was going to be a first for them, which at this point is a miracle because they don't have a lot of 'firsts' after last week. For all of the time they had until the day, Ezraphel's mood has been on a high that just wasn't coming down. It was actually kind of annoying since in contrast to her enthusiasm he was a ball of nerves and frustration. Remember when he referred to 'fine dining' as an abyss, well he wasn't just talking about finances.

He had felt a bit irritated that he would have to rent a tuxedo for the venue but actually he didn't have to because as it turns out the modern dress code for table cloth restaurants was actually a combination of clothing termed 'business casual'. Stanley has never heard of such a thing and upon consulting Dr. Google he found that none of his current wardrobe fit the images he was presented with and so he had to take a trip to a name brand clothing store to get the good stuff.

And if you think buying a new set of wardrobe was the end of Stanley's problems this week, ho-ho you are in for one hell of a ride.

The purchase itself went against everything he stood for when it came to his definition of economic spending but as with every time something like this pops up he always felt that Ezraphel was worth it. He had planned to go by himself but somehow Ezraphel found out and managed to give a pretty good argument as to why he should let her go with him. No she didn't have get on her knees or take off her clothes. She just conjured a full length mirror and stuck him in front of it.

That pretty much killed any arguments he might have against bringing her along.

Yeah, he forgot his sense of fashion sucked and it would be much preferable to have Ezraphel's impeccable taste in wardrobe selection, gained from hours upon hours of binging fashion videos, be his guide. He was hoping for a smooth transition but he should have known that was a fool's dream and that he was being stupid for hoping any public outing with Ezraphel was going to be smooth.

They'd showed up at the clothing store that sold the best brand and the first thing of note to happen was that one employee mistook them for relatives. Well Stanley thought it was a mistake but in actuality, according to Ezraphel it was the first of a series of subtle probing questions to find out if she was in a relationship with someone.

Of course the guy didn't expect Stanley to be that someone and the look on his face when she rectified his 'mistake' in hindsight was almost worth the sudden migraine when Ezraphel introduced herself as his wife.

"The rings are still being made" Stanley remembered saying from within the palms covering his face.

That epic failure of an attempt at flirting practically set the tone for the rest of the trip. Even when she wasn't deliberately looking like sex incarnate Ezraphel drew the most unwanted attention. He just wanted one good outfit but she wanted a Stanley Fashion Show and dressed him up in any outfit that looked good. Thank god he had the physique for it now otherwise it would have been more embarrassing which was saying something.

Aside from that bit Ezraphel's over the top displays of affection, which he knew for a fact was deliberate, drew eyes to him and that is never a good thing. Stanley and public perception don't have the best relationship and it stemmed from the bane of most adolescent life, fucking Highschool, but that wasn't a can of worms he was willing to open, ever. But long story short, he adopted the art of not giving a fuck about anything or anybody and told himself into thinking that it didn't matter what people thought about him.

To a degree that was true.

He thought he knew the reason for their gawking before (Ezraphel) but then something happened, an event that caused him to gain perspective. At the cashier Stanley happened to catch a glimpse of a full length mirror, one of several in the store and this one happened to catch both him and Ezraphel standing side by side. Ezraphel looked happy enough and very stunning even as a human. As for him even with the cosmetic change brought on by Ezraphel's spell he still saw a troll next to a Super Model. Objectively handsome he may be but his unkempt hair, wrinkled t-shirt, baggy sweats and flip flops did not do him any favors.

Stanley really didn't care for what strangers thought of him and he knew Ezraphel could give a damn about the opinions of sheep but some things would not slide. The thing about why his appearance was bothering him so much was because he realized that unlike Ezraphel who always does her best to 'represent' in their relationship, Stanley doesn't. Here she was dressed in her best, looking like she leapt out the pages of a fucking catalogue and meanwhile he literally just threw on the first thing he could get his hands on.

It shouldn't matter to him what other people thought, fuck em, but at the same time what does it say about him that he wasn't willing to actually try? After a bout of self reflection vowed to himself that he would at least try. He wasn't about to go beyond the pale and pretend to be something he wasn't like a cliché but at the very least the next time they are in public people wouldn't be so surprised that a manlet managed to score a woman like Ezraphel.