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Cultivator Battle Royale

Every year, a group of the weakest cultivators in the planet is offered the chance to compete in the Cultivation Battle Royale, a chance for them to rapidly gain power as they defeat other cultivators and risk their lives for valuable herbs, pills, and techniques. Xing Wenghu, The reincarnation of the Immortal 9 Quadrants Chicken Wing Emperor is chosen to enter. Having failed the Thunder Tribulation of moving out of his parents house, he risks life and limb to overtake the other "Bizarre" cultivators he competes against. A satirical parody of many cultivation tropes, stories and characters.

SmilesS · Fantasy
Not enough ratings
10 Chs

Prologue

Xing Wenghu dramatically stared out the roof of his parent's house, gazing into the night sky.

He deeply reflected the lessons he was meant to learn in this reincarnation. The memories of his past life that led him to this moment ran through his mind and filled him with great anger.

Xing Wenghu had been just an ordinary boy, selected by the supreme Dao deities to ascend and become one of the most powerful cultivators in existence.

You could say, he was indeed a special young man because of this.

He had trained in their subspace dimension, learning only the most powerful of techniques and rapidly breaking through barriers nobody on this mortal earth could ever surpass.

Because of this, he had a large target placed upon his back.

Xing Wenghu was the target of great envy amongst several of the celestial deities and cultivators.

A tragedy, that led to him killing his mentor in self defense.

This scene was most significant to him, the two were standing in the Celestial Primordial Cultivation gardens. The once beautiful grass had been torn to shreds and destroyed by their conflict.

Several cultivators around them laid dead or defeated, Xing Wenghu's mentor laid on his knees on the ground prepared to recite his last words.

"Oh God...Oh Fuck...Y-Your.. You're so much more powerful than me Xing Wenghu!!!"

His mentor's voice was weak, and preparing to beg for mercy.

Xing Wenghu only stood in front of the man he formerly respected, his hair glowing all sorts of colors from how advanced his cultivation was at this point in time.

He didn't need to waste any more time with this weak "Boomer".

With just a raise of his hand, Xing Wenghu united the man's head with the ground.

Xing Wenghu stood in the middle of the Primordial Celestial garden, utterly uncaring and unemphatic from this event.

He didn't need any of these weak cultivator Boomers to tell him what to do.

With his own power he would easily grow to surpass far more of them!

Over the next several thousand years, Xing Wenghu gained massive amounts of power, cultivation and took over several galactic quadrants.

He had even achieved the title of 9 Sects Immortal Phoenix Chicken Wing of the Honey Roast Emperor!

His harem of women was so massive and big, just like his cultivation. Thousands of Jade Celestial Beauties from all over the galactic quadrants ran over to worship and please Xing Wenghu.

But this would prove to be his fatal mistake.

One day, after a night of "entertainment" with his most favored Jade Empress. He awoke to find his meridians slowly evaporating, and feeling as if his entire body were on fire.

The smug visage of Jade Empress Xiao Hua was seen over him, laughing at his misery.

"Silly man, you never should have trusted me. Now I will take all of your secrets, and crown myself the Immortal Phoenix Chicken Wing of the Honey Roast Empress!"

Her voice was boastful and arrogant, as Xing Wenghu could only curse in frustration and anger.

"Damn you vile woman, I'll kill you in my next life!!!" were Xing Wenghu's final words as he was forced to feel the sensation every character he killed up to this point had felt.

The feeling of becoming irrelevant and dieing.

He collapsed, waking up in the body of an average 18 year old boy who lived with his parents.

With determination in his heart, Xing Wenghu set his mind on recovering his former powers, and getting revenge on that damn bitch Xiao Hua.

This was what Xing Wenghu truly believed as he stared out the roof of his parents house, having failed the tribulation of getting a job and moving out.

Luckily, a opportunity for power had slipped into his fingers.

He had been selected as one of the lucky participants for the National Cultivator Battle Royale, which took place in America.

Where only the weakest amongst cultivators could participate.

There, they would be forced to survive for weeks in an undisclosed secluded island while surrounded by cultivation resources and martial scrolls.

The lucky winner would have untold power, only at the deaths of everyone else.

He clasped his hand, determined to take advantage of this opportunity.

In his past life, he knew exactly everything about the battle royale, and where every single martial herb, scroll would be located. Nothing could stop him now.

"Xiiiiiiinnnnng, I need you to take out the trash!!!" Xing's mom loudly called from below at him. A vein threatened to burst from Xing's forehead, how dare his mother interrupt him!

"Moooooom, I'm having a monologue!!! Don't interrupt me!"

He shouted back down at her, before going back to thinking in deep contemplation.

He wouldn't dare lose the battle royale, for it was his first step to reclaiming his power as the Immortal Phoenix Chicken Wing of the Honey Roast Emperor.