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Critical Hit: The World’s Clumsiest Sword Saint

[Target in sight.] [Skill Critical Eye has been activated.] Being clumsy is quite common. But Luke Hunter’s clumsiness is on a different level. As the young man quite literally stumbles through life, he wonders if there’s something more he could be doing in the world. His dreams may come to be realized, as a freak accident causes Luke to wake up as Klum, in a completely different setting than his day-to-day life. His Dexterity, a skill that measures things such as flexibility and how well one holds themself, sits at the level it was in his past life; 1. And yet, he finds his skills to be suited for an extremely coordinated individual, especially after he meets the only other Sword Saint to have ever existed, an individual who is the strongest Swordsman among those both alive and passed on. It’s up to him to find his way in his new life, and strive to reach the path of the highest Swordsman — the Sword Saint. Will he be able to transform his 1 Dexterity into a 1000? Or will he be dragged into something much deeper — much darker? Credits to valeri_mirley on fiverr for the new cover! Updating 5-10 chapters a week, and now posting on RoyalRoad!

kyci · Fantasy
Not enough ratings
116 Chs

Chapter 102 - A Chicken

I felt like I was being kidnapped in the most brutal way possible. I mean, if my stats weren't boosted as they were now, I'd be dead by now.

This damn bird flew off so fast the cord broke straight through the pillar, leaving a small gap in it. The portion of the wall then sags down, until the pillar was touching its bottom half again.

I find myself being dragged once again, unwillingly, through several objects and towards the windows. Even covered in scrapes, bruises, and cuts, I refuse to let go of my handle. I knew she was counting on me to hold it, but if I let go, it would fly away with her in the time it took to de-materialize the solid Mana, meaning I would lose my only (worthwhile) weapon.

"Ahhh… Dammit."

[Free Stats: 21 -> 16]

[STR: 37(+11) -> 42(+12)]

[Stats taking effect in 3…]

I kick a desk out of my way, and in the back of my mind I note how the open room looks very much like my old office — the one that followed me into my dreams.

This thought is quickly overshadowed as I realize how little space I have before open air, once more.

[…2…]

"Why the hell does the countdown even exist?!" I complain loudly, digging my bloodied bare heels into the ground again and extending the cord as long as I can make it. But, it's not enough, as my momentum continues pushing me forward. The bird goes crashing out the window, and…

[…1.]

[New Stats have come into effect.]

"Fuuuuck!" I scream, snapping the cord taut again as I yank my arms back and push my legs forward. Every bone in my body screams back, threatening to snap at any moment, but the reverse force that I've turned on my body snaps the damn wet-shitter trying to fly off back, twisting her body at an awkward angle. She begins to fall as she tries to right herself, and feeling my body reach its limit, I jump up and yank the cord with both hands, sending me flying towards her.

'Revert,' I think, and the cuff slips off, slinking quickly towards me and whipping back into a sword, which I draw back. I circulate Mana in the chainsaw shape around the edge of the blade, activating my Skill.

[Skill Mana Blade has been activated.]

[Agile Bird has activated Skill Deadly Talon.]

While still flailing in the air, the stupid bird's talon swings around her body, blocking the blow. A dark purple and black swirl around each other in a continuous shower of sparks. She's used this as an opportunity to right herself, spreading her wings in preparation to take off. With lack of a better idea, I throw my left arm forward, grabbing her right wing and yanking it to my left so that she can't bend or flap it. She screeches, trying to push off with her talon, to no avail.

We spin and roll around as the ground races to embrace us, locked together. She opens her beak, and black fog spills from it, her eyes rolling back in her head.

[Skill Detect Dark was activated.]

[Warning! Dark Seed sprouting!]

"…Really?! You're chickening out? You a little chicken now? Bawkkkk bawk bawk!" I yell at max volume, my voice cracking in places because of it and the high, cold wind hitting my face and throat. "You're going to give away your life to a demon to win?! Sounds like an L to me!"

* * *

"Bawkkkk bawk bawk!"

Though she was losing consciousness, the condescending words of the boy still hit Agile Bird's ears. 'I have to kill him…'

She was being pulled further into her own body; it felt as though something within her chest was reaching out and grabbing her mind, her soul… Using it as a stepping stone to escape.

"You're going to give away your life to a demon to win?!…"

'A demon? What on Puria is he talking about? I would never,' she thinks, but she can't move her mouth to say so. The thing inside her chest halts, albeit only for a moment before it resumes tugging. 'A demon can't have me. I have to take care of my daughter. My daughter…'

"My… daughter…"

Flashes of memories swim through her head — the first time holding her newborn child, when she learned to walk and talk, when she learned how to use her wings to fly, even just a little. She was a Hippogriffus, part lion, part bird, part human.

'She will do great things one day. Much better things than me or her father. But we did it all for you, dear…'

Her chest rumbles, as the thing hiding within it loses patience, clawing violently to overtake her soul. 'A demon, huh?' She wonders, her eyes unseeing, no feeling within her body. '… I can't let you take over.'

Focusing, the woman begins forcing her Mana through her veins, which feel as if they're stuffed with sludge. She finds the source, preparing to isolate it.

Her body still isn't hers again, but she can feel the air whistling through the feathers of her wings. She smiles a bit, although it's mostly a mental one, because, well… she currently has a beak.

'Oh, how I love the sky,' she thinks as she switches her focus entirely to the source of the sludge filling her.

* * *

Arctic blue Mana courses through the chicken's body suddenly, overpowering the black magic spreading across her body. "Woah," I say, subconsciously letting go of her wing, which unfurls gracefully. Two rings form around the Seed inside her, forcing the Seed back to its initial state, which eventually becomes invisible to my eye, leaving only the two spinning rings.

The wind begins to catch her, lifting her gently. And in the process, I find myself continuing to fall. "Fuck, wait!—"

Folding her limbs in, the now cage-free chicken divebombs towards me, spinning continuously so that her beak looks like a drill beelining straight for my stomach. I open my mouth to scream, and the wind is knocked out of me, preventing me from doing so as large claws wrap around my gut, pulling me into her plummet.

Yet, by the time I've taken in a breath, she's extending her wings and we're flying straight up, the Gs crashing on my body flattening my lungs a second time.

While I'm trying to take ONE breath, this fucking bird seems to be having the time of her life, tossing me in the air and flying upside down before my limp body falls back into her bird feet, and then she loop-de-loops down to the ground in an empty alleyway, setting me on my feet before shifting back into her humanoid shape in a kneeling position. Thanks to a certain Dexterity-manipulating Skill, I'm in no trouble of being sick, but my knees tremble as my soul threatens to leave my body so that it doesn't have to deal with this shit anymore.

Just to be safe, I Analyze the woman to ensure she's not actually a demon in disguise. I'm not sure whether to be relieved or disheartened by the answer.

[Name: Yauln {Agile Bird}]

[Age: 32]

[Lv: 85]

[Class: Hybri-Morph]

[Health: 85/85]

[Mana: 136/136]

[Stamina: 95:95]

STR: 20 MAG: 20

AGI: 123 DEX: 75

VIT: 19 INT: 60

ACC: 99

DEF: 19

POW: 40

[Skills: Full-Raven Transformation (Super Rare), Hyper-Flight (Super Rare), Deadly Talon (Rare), Peck+ (Rare), Chirp (Uncommon), Slash+ (Uncommon)]

[Spells: Tailwind's Push, Headwind's Pull, Sudden Updraft, Air Current]

[Affinities: Wind, Dark]

"If she had just gone all out and fought me, I'd be a goner…"

She was only the second case I had ever seen of someone having over 100 in her stats. It was no wonder Close the Gap had activated, and even then I was heavily outclassed.

With a sharp breath, I suck in the bits of my soul attempting to escape, turning to the bird lady, who is joyfully running her fingers across her skin, which is as black as the feathers that had just been covering her body. "I never thought I'd be so happy about being in my own body," she says, eyeing me up and down. I return the look, holding my sword defensively. It's comical, really; I'm in a dirtied white t-shirt and black shorts, and she's in short shorts and a tank top, holding one of the talon weapons in her hand to become more of a claw weapon.

"We… still doing this?" I ask suspiciously, gripping my sword in both hands. She shakes her head. "I'm not a demon, or whatever you called me. I have—"

"A daughter. With who you serve, you really thought that was the best idea?"

She scoffs, throwing her weapon into her Inventory, and I do the same with mine. " It's not like it was… planned. You know, my orders were to kill you if I ever laid my eyes on you?"

"Well, your eyes are just looking at me, not on me, so I think we're good."

She stares blankly at me for a moment. Then, a grin grows on her face, and she begins to giggle slowly, growing louder until it's full-blown laughter. "Ah, I get it! That's quite funny!"

I blink several times in response. "You… don't get out much, huh?"

"On the contrary, I travel often. I'm traveling right now."

"… Anyway, why did you decide to work for the Stringmaster? It's pretty obvious he'd fuck you over." I bite my tongue to keep from adding, 'And what the fuck is Chirp?!'

She shrugs. "Pantholeo and I were sold to him, so it's not like we had much choice. I guess he saw potential in us. After all, he's a werebeast and I'm a hagraven, both incredibly rare."

Ding!

I ignore the message, focusing on the woman in front of me, my breathing becoming more regular. "So, you were slaves?"

She nods. "Unfortunately. Most major crime rings have been taken out by now, but there used to be a big group that took in orphaned kids of all races — human, elf, hybrids — and sold them once they were 'trained' to be obedient. The Stringmaster allowed us to eradicate them all when we were properly trained."

My eyes flick up instantly. "Wait a minute. You've met the Stringmaster??"

She glares at me, and I avert my eyes quickly. "What? You said you got rid of them all, right? No slavers to worry about."

She shakes her head, clearly a bit aggravated now. "Not ALL of them. They still work in the shadows, and with all the time that's passed, they've collected themselves to resume operations."

"Then as the next Sword Saint—" I cringe at the phrase, remembering a certain heretical asshole who claimed incessantly that HE was the next Saint. "… As the World's Clumsiest Sword Saint, I promise to take them down, after I get the Stringmaster. If you can provide the information I need, anyway."

She mulls it over, biting her lip. After a minute of uncomfortable silence, she gives me a wide grin, white teeth completely opposite of her skin.

"Fine. But, I have one condition."

Happy memorial day!

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