494 Chapter 7 : A Settled Night

IT WAS PAST 11 p.m., after the lights-out time.

In the shared room, it seemed that everyone was still awake, spending time talking quietly or looking at their phones. At the beginning of the camp, the unfamiliar members made the atmosphere uncomfortable, but now I didn't care what that atmosphere had turned into.

While occasionally participating in conversations with Hashimoto, Oda, and kōhais, nodding in agreement now and then, my phone vibrated as I was watching a patchwork video.

[Are you still awake?]

A message from Hiyori was displayed at the top of the screen.

[I'm awake. All the boys are still awake, so don't worry.]

I told Hiyori to make it easier for her to continue sending messages.

[Thank you. Actually, I just noticed that Yamamura-san is missing.]

Yamamura is missing? It was basically forbidden to leave the room after lights-out.

[You mean outside the room? What about her phone?]

[It seems to be left in the room. I was contemplating whether to go and look for her now... I was wondering if I could ask for your help, Ayanokōji-kun.]

Hiyori probably wasn't good at this kind of thing, to say the least. Especially if she couldn't act stealthily, a patrolling teacher would easily spot her.

It could be said that it was the right decision to ask for help here.

The camp was almost over, but it seemed better not to leave Yamamura alone.

She had a particularly gloomy expression during yesterday's card game.

A possible reason why came to mind. I should go and look for her right away.

[I understand. I'll go and check on her, so Hiyori, please wait in your room. We need a way to confirm if Yamamura comes back.]

When I told her that it would be more useful for her to stay in the room without leaving, a reply came back with a cute animal stamp saying 'Thank you.'

"I'm going out for a bit."

"Eh? Hey, it's past lights-out, you know? If they find you, you'll get in trouble."

"I'm going looking for something. I'll try to come back without being noticed, if possible. If something happens, you guys can get mad at me."

When I gave my answer, Hashimoto and the others didn't try hard to make me stay. Instead, they seemed quite happy and saw me off cheerfully.

The corridor was, of course, dark and silent since the lights were off.

Now... where should I start looking?

Wandering aimlessly wouldn't be efficient.

There were two possible reasons why Yamamura, who wasn't the type to break basic rules, left the shared room: either she was called out by someone, or she left the room voluntarily. However, in this case, the possibility of the former was quite low since she left her phone behind.

I proceeded with the assumption that she left voluntarily.

The next thing to consider was why it had to be after they turned the lights off.

In contrast to the night's silent environment, countless distracting thoughts flooded my mind.

There might've been times when you'd want to run away from the surroundings after all that

But at that time, it wouldn't be strange to subconsciously seek a place where you could feel at ease.

The conclusion reached by the line of thought belonging to a student named Miki Yamamura—if I were to derive that…

I quietly showed my face in the lobby.

Immediately after, I felt someone's presence and hid in the shadows.

It seemed that a patrolling teacher was walking around with a flashlight.

The visibility was poor, but it was easy to see where the light was shining.

He thoroughly illuminated the surroundings, but he didn't seem to be actively seeking a rule-breaking student who had left the shared room.

He was just doing it as part of his job as if he was doing it out of obligation.

Therefore, it was very easy to get past him, and his presence disappeared from the lobby as soon as I waited a little. It seemed he went to check the dining hall.

Considering the route he took, he must've gone to either the shared rooms or the experiential classrooms afterward.

There was a brief pause. I headed straight to the vending machine without hesitation.

I had a hunch that the odds were high, and I was able to confirm my guess immediately.

There wasn't a girl sitting alone, instead, she was leaning against the vending machine, looking down.

The hallway was chilly, so she might've been trying to keep warm, but that might be reading too much into it. I thought she would've noticed me eventually, but she didn't seem to be aware of my presence at all.

There was no change in expression, no sighs, as if nothing triggered a memory.

She just stared at a single point on the floor, not moving at all.

"The teachers probably don't even think there's a student here."

I couldn't just keep watching her, so I decided to call out to her.

"Ah… Eh!?"

Yamamura, startled, turned her face towards me.

Her eyes were filled with fear, but as soon as she realized it was me, that fear dissipated.

"Wh-wh-wh-why are you here...?"

"They'll get mad if they find you. I came to take you back before that happens."

"I was confident that… I wouldn't be found… but if you found me, I can't use that excuse, can I…?"

Yamamura could certainly avoid the teachers' surveillance and even return to the shared room.

"...How did you… notice I was gone?"

"There's no special reason. Hiyori just noticed you were gone, and she told me about it. She was worried."

"I'm sorry… I just really wanted to be alone..."

"You can't be alone in a shared room unless you lock yourself in the bathroom."

She nodded slightly, indicating that I understood.

"Can I… stay here a little longer...?"

"Do you have to be next to the vending machine?"

"Yes. When I listen to the sound of the vending machine, the unnecessary voices in my mind disappear..."

This behavior seemed to be a standard way for Yamamura to protect herself.

"Then I guess this is the only place. So? Did the unnecessary voices disappear?"

"Wh-why are you asking that...?"

"If they don't disappear and I take you back, you might run away again. Besides, I hate to say it, but it didn't look like it was working."

"Usually, they stop immediately and it's resolved… usually..."

In other words, it was different now. From Yamamura's downcast expression, I could tell something serious was going on.

"If you have something bothering you, you should try expressing it."

"...No. I'm fine."

"Really? I've been watching you here for about five minutes, and I didn't get that impression at all."

"F-five minutes!? Really...!?"

"Sorry, I lied. It was about 30 seconds."

The fact that she didn't doubt even an arbitrary number of minutes suggested that she wasn't aware of her surroundings.

"Do you not like talking about your troubles with others?"

"It's not about liking or disliking, I just… don't have that kind of experience..."

Even without discussing it much, it wasn't hard to imagine Yamamura's life.

She probably spent a lot of time alone from a young age and spent more time with her mouth shut rather than open.

Even though our circumstances and situations were very different, I could tell that we had similar experiences.

"I'm not good at talking either. If there's a small problem, I tend to keep it to myself or try to solve it on my own. So I rarely have the opportunity to consult with someone about my troubles."

"You too, Ayanokōji-kun? But to me… you seem normal. You seem to have a lot of friends. And Shiina-san too. She's bright and cute… I'm jealous..."

If you only look at the present, it probably wasn't unreasonable to feel that way.

However, everyone has had a less mature side in their past, different from who they are now.

"Can you picture how I was during the earlier part of last year?"

She probably wasn't helping Sakayanagi at the time, so she wouldn't know.

"...Now that you mention it… I don't know anything."

"Right? So you could only be sure that I wasn't a student who left an impression on many people. Fortunately, I was pulled along by my lively classmates and was able to build some relationships, but that wasn't something I arranged myself."

"But why have you become like this now?"

"I wasn't close with those around me, but at least in these last two years, I've started to try to close the distance, little by little. I think that's had an impact. I've started being able to express what I've wanted to say around that time."

Yamamura still couldn't understand it.

"I'm… probably scared. Of voicing my thoughts. And of those thoughts spreading unintentionally. I'm scared of being known..."

Yamamura's style until now had been the opposite.

Picking up other people's thoughts in secret and passing them on to a third party.

It wasn't unreasonable to feel a strong resistance when transitioning from being the one who knows to being the one known.

"I won't force you. You should judge for yourself."

Without making her too conscious, I slowly sat down in front of the vending machine, leaving some distance.

I could feel the slight vibration of the vending machine and the sound of the fan through my back.

Yamamura wasn't the only one who feared loneliness.

Whether it was Yōsuke, Kei, Ryūen, Sakayanagi, or any other student, human nature was the same.

Unable to bear loneliness, they couldn't live alone.

That was why those who stood by you without asking anything in return were important.

Even though I didn't feel it applied to me, I understood that it was an answer.

The contradiction it contained.

No, that fact doesn't matter now.

The Yamamura in front of me wasn't foolish.

She wasn't seeking loneliness, nor did she think loneliness was right.

If there was someone who could offer a proper helping hand, she wouldn't make a mistake.

"...Can I talk to you?"

Yamamura, who sensed no hostility, began to voice what she had been holding back.

"Since the last special exam ended, I've had one question in my mind..."

It was about the details of what happened in Class A during the survival and elimination special exam.

In a situation where defeat was certain and a dropout had to be chosen, Sakayanagi chose to draw lots. No matter how she decided, there would be pros and cons.

Since everyone didn't have the same abilities, there would always be those who were dissatisfied, whether you directly named them or played rock-paper-scissors.

To Sakayanagi, who saw all students other than herself, as equals, the lottery was probably the most equitable decision.

However, she must've realized that it was a mistake.

Even if she was disliked by those around her, she should've kept the person that was most convenient for her.

If Kamuro had stayed, Sakayanagi's weakness wouldn't have been exposed.

But Sakayanagi wasn't the only one who was hurt.

Yamamura was standing on a side of the scales that separated the final two choices in the lottery, life and death.

"When I hesitated to draw a lot, Sakayanagi-san said she would stop the lottery. If you didn't have the courage to draw a lot, it was the same as abstaining..."

If she refused to draw for a long time, it was certainly a choice she could make.

But Yamamura felt that it was too quick a judgment to call it a careful consideration.

"Did Sakayanagi value Kamuro and try to cut you off?"

Yamamura quietly nodded. It wasn't just a guess, but Yamamura's conviction.

"I strongly felt that Sakayanagi-san wanted me to withdraw at that moment."

And she continued.

"I understand that it can't be helped. At least, when comparing me and Kamuro-san, the value was clear. I didn't wish to have special treatment. I didn't even want to be greedy and wish to be considered a friend. But... I was shocked to know that my existence was something that could be discarded in an instant... even though she used me, saying I was a valuable person..."

Sakayanagi had found Yamamura, who had always been alone, and highly valued her ability. However, when she weighed her against Kamuro, she realized that the difference between the two was so great that it wasn't even a contest.

In the end, she knew Kamuro would be chosen, but she thought she would hesitate.

Yamamura's small wish, one that she belittled herself for, was mercilessly denied.

"Sakayanagi may have indeed seen a difference between you and Kamuro, but whether she thinks you're irrelevant or not, isn't that a separate issue?"

"...I want to believe that, but..."

She probably hadn't had any contact with Sakayanagi since that day.

So she must've been questioning herself this whole time.

"I've been thinking about talking to Sakayanagi-san during this camp, but I couldn't muster the courage. I couldn't call out to her..."

Although she had spotted her several times, it seemed she had never managed to speak to her. It must've been a considerable hurdle for Yamamura, who usually waited to be spoken to.

"More people were clinging to her than I thought. In the middle of it all, Tokitō-kun got into trouble... It looked like a difficult time."

Yamamura expressed her thoughts, revealing Tokitō's attempt to extend a helping hand to a dispirited Sakayanagi.

However, being witnessed led him to be summoned to an experiential classroom and interrogated.

"As a result, Tokitō-kun was... forcibly restrained and threatened by Ryūen-kun and his group."

It was probably an appropriate decision on Ryūen's side, who was tense in preparation for the end-of-year exams.

If the opponent they were going to fight in the future was unexpectedly weak, they would either leave them alone or weaken them further. Although some parts were too radical to ignore.

He seems to have established a strong sense of alertness, intending to approach the next end-of-grade exam thoroughly prepared.

For Ryūen, who was confirmed to compete with Sakayanagi in the end-of-year exam, it was natural to think that he didn't want to stimulate and revive her.

He seemed desperate to take advantage of the situation where she'd been tripped up by an unexpected defeat.

In other words, it was proof that Sakayanagi was an opponent who couldn't be underestimated and lacked weaknesses.

Tokitō's purge in the flow of things was expected to come to a fast end. However, Tokitō's groupmates, Hōsen and Utomiya, joined in, and there was a risk of a brawl. It seemed that the situation was resolved when the number of students who heard the commotion suddenly increased all at once, and they dispersed.

<Illustration >

"But I'm impressed. You watched the whole thing and no one noticed?"

"That's all I'm able to do..."

Yamamura was perfectly suited to gather information, utilizing her lack of presence.

Sakayanagi's skill in promptly recognizing and utilizing that ability was once again impressive.

This time, Yamamura was able to witness the scene because she herself was concerned about Sakayanagi.

Indeed, Sakayanagi was now on a downward slope.

"What do you want to do?"

"Huh...?"

"As a classmate and as someone who's likely to be abandoned by Sakayanagi, what do you want me to do?"

"I, um..."

"I want to hear your feelings."

"I have... two wishes. One is... I want to know what she thought of me then, and what she thinks of me now. "

"And the other one?"

"... I think... Sakayanagi-san doesn't suit losing... I don't want to see her struggle in the end-of-year exam... I hope she wins."

There were no personal calculations, no wanting her to win just because she was a Class A student, just a genuine concern for a student.

"Is that so…? I see."

Sakayanagi might need a little push. And soon.

"Why don't you try telling her? No one has the right to condemn your actions."

"What if... what if... she doesn't even want to listen to me...?"

"In that case, let's say, I'll get stuck in between some vending machines and talk it over."

When I told her that, Yamamura looked at the vending machine a little shyly and nodded.