Chapter 8: Searching for Traces

[Words: 6588]

A/N: Chapter is going to be long, and the first part of the chapter will explaining Kurushima's plans, and a couple of other things with what he per example tasked Kushida in depth. 

As for the second part, you'll see.

--

[22nd August, 8.21]

[Third-Person Pov]

Arriving at his class, quite a few of his classmates were looking at him. It seemed like the rumors had spread further about him.

"Is there anything wrong?" he asked.

Although he was sure why they had gathered around him, it was just a polite way of saying, 'What are you staring at?' since he didn't even dare to think of saying that. 

"Ey Bro, is it true that you're dating someone? Who was it again? Ah, that girl from Class C?" Sudo, being his friend, was the first one to ask this.

Of course, seeing no reason to deny them dating, he admitted it. "Yes, we are. Why are you asking?"

Seeing him casually speaking about that like that made them shocked. Ayanokoji simply stared at him in slight curiosity. 

'A girlfriend, huh? He knows that the class might object to his relationship with the girl. In a competition between classes, it's quite unusual if two people from different classes date. Especially if that includes the leader of one class.' Ayanokoji thought, looking at Kurushima.

"I mean, isn't she in a different class? Don't you think she might be a-"

He looked annoyed at Sudo. 

"A spy? Hahaha, good joke. If you truly want to tell me with whom I should be together, you should stop right now, Sudo. Is there anyone else who wants to object to my relationship with her, perhaps?"

People seemed to have recognized that no matter what would happen, he wouldn't think of answering this kind of question. A couple of people, including Ayanokoji, didn't even know he was in a relationship.

He was never someone to check out rumors or other things out.

Kurushima began to sit himself down. He was quite annoyed because, these past few days, everyone kept asking him that. 

His phone alone was full of messages.

Why couldn't people just care about their own problems?

He frowned with a deep sigh. 

"Congratulations, uh, Kurushima."

"Thank you."

As the lesson ended, he headed towards Class C. 

Since he was still fairly convinced not to stay at this school for the long term, he wanted to spend every minute with her. 

For the first time in these past eight years, he could genuinely smile when he was together with her. Something he thought he lost after their deaths.

It wasn't false, like the smile he always puts on, but a really genuinely one.

However, this happiness won't last for long...

After all, now that he had the poison, influence didn't matter to him precisely anymore, so staying any longer was not needed anymore. 

He could now bring Chairman Sakayanagi efficiently to talk. 

The only reason he kept on continuing to grow his influence was because he had planned to expel people, admitting it to him, and continuing it, making him slowly despair, if the plan with the poison did not work, as there was no poisonous substance within the school. 

There was something he could make, but for that, he needed poisonous substances to work with that component. But poisonous substances were something not available in the school. 

He nearly gave up on that plan with the poison, which is why he planned on joining the Student Council and becoming the President, until the perfect opportunity was there: The Island Exam. 

With the Island Exam, he had two objectives: Testing Ayanokoji's abilities to see whether he might be a threat to his plan, of expelling students. His other objective was to see if he could find any poisonous berries on the island, to see if he had to rely on the first plan or could change to his Poison plan.

Unexpectedly, he found them. It was a miracle that the school decided on keeping them there, but who was he to object that decision?

The school wanted the students to survive, even with poisonous berries on the Island, but never did they think someone would take them, to create a Poison. 

Neither did he. 

He put so many resources and efforts into his other plan, just to get Chairman Sakayanagi to talk. 

He gained enormous influence, popularity, and fame, is rumored to be one of the best students ever, and also, brought the class of the defectives, Class D, into Class A, something no one had achieved before in school history.

Of course, if he had never heard the conversation between Ayanokoji and his homeroom Teacher, Chabashira-sensei, he would have done the Island Exam by himself. But since there wasn't any need to do it, he let Ayanokoji do it.

As for Chairman Sakayanagi, this school was entrusted to him by his father, so for him to fail, what would that mean?

And what could he do against it? 

Nothing. 

Promising graduates would be expelled because of him.

And worst of all, he cannot uphold his father's legacy; he surely would have despaired, seeing how everything goes into the ruins.

That was how Kurushima had initially tried to confront him. 

Knowing his own position so well that he cannot easily expel him, and certainly even without the special exams, since he would be simply absolving them, he wondered what method he would be thinking of.

He was also making sure to get 20 Million Points in case something went wrong, to negate his expulsion. 

One of the reasons Kushida was important to his previous plan was that she was instructed by him to give the upper-class men a piece of paper.

It wasn't just a piece of paper, but one with whom he could easily deduce their personalities to a great extent. 

A simple method, where he spares quite a bit of time. Besides, while girls might be open to him, boys certainly are not. 

Unlike Kushida's situation, the boys don't tend to reveal them to him too much. That was one of the reasons why she was effective for this task.

Seeing that she was making great progress with it, he didn't mind getting ahold of a decent amount of the upperclassman's personalities.

He could fabricate an expulsion by framing it on Nagumo, or he could not do so. He had many choices. 

As for how Kushida had to do it, he had suggested a few ideas, but just act like the junior who cares about her upperclassmen and wants to know them better.

In short, how she always acted like.

She had just had them fill out these papers. Say it is for a survey, or something else; it didn't matter to him.

All she had to do was give them the 'Twenty-Statement Test' and explain to them what to do; afterward, just give it to him in an envelope. 

You had to fill in the blanks within twenty sentences, starting with the letter "I" with whatever you liked. 

There were no restrictions. 

Just write something starting with the letter "I.". Sounds easy, right?

But, in fact, it isn't. 

It's a self-reflection paper to see what the person thinks about themselves. 

With these questions alone, he could create schemes of expelling them properly, without arriving suspicious, or he could offer those who were more carrier-oriented lucrative offers for his company.

Alone, the company itself has a positive image, as it's one of the few that don't overwork their workers, don't expect them to stay without pay as long as the superior stays, nor are they forced to come along drinking. 

They could simply go, without being afraid of being fired, and could enjoy their free time in peace. Aside from that, there were various other good offers. 

However, these things were certainly very uncommon in Japan. 

That fact alone should make them try to befriend him.

Of course, some might not do this test, but there were also, of course, many that would do them. 

If she used her charm well, a proper amount of people would do it. 

After all, who could reject such a cute junior? 

While some might ask what it is, he doubted some to see his true intentions from this alone. No one in particular could imagine that those are used to expel some of them, perhaps.

Although, the piece of paper wasn't the only thing she had at her disposal. He had instructed her to wear a certain cloth, which had been designed by him, with much effort, to have a specific pattern.

It's a design from one of the ten inkblot tests from the [Rorschach Inkblot Test], which was designed by Psychologist Hermann Rorschach, by asking people what they see when they look at an abstract, symmetrical drawing. 

There were up to ten different Inkblots, to help people who have trouble telling their psychologist about themselves and to make it easier to identify their problems.

Each one of these Inkblots was different and had different meanings, depending on the inkblot and how the client interpreted them. 

Let's take this Inkblot as an example:

[Image:] 

It's the first Inkblot out of Ten from the Rorschach Test. This card can be a crucial starting point in understanding the intricacies of an individual's psyche, or at least one aspect of one's subconscious mind can be understood with it.

If one sees a mask, it can symbolize that one conceals the truth, as they themselves are wearing a mask in front of others', acting different than they are. 

Kushida herself saw it also as a Mask, just thinking that the 'bastard' who was 'blackmailing' her, made a couple of hints from her personality on the cloth.

She hasn't realized at all what he intended to use it for.

But this was also quite troublesome.

While it might sound easy, in hindsight, it really isn't. If you want to fully analyze one person, there's far more needed than that: to understand an individual completely. 

Usually, when you do such a Test, you're asked to say the first thing you see in the Inkblot. Once answered, and you have no remaining thoughts of what it might be, you're given the next Inkblot. 

That process continues until you completed all 10 Inkblots, whereas your psychologist notes everything you say to accurately grasp your problem.

The bothersome part for Kurushima came here. If you want to accurately make a diagnosis of your client, you'd need to use the [Exner System Of Scoring], which was a scoring system created by Dr. John E. Exner, published in 1969, to interpret the [Rorschach Ink Test].

It was something too troublesome for him to do. Besides, he doesn't want Kushida to question his identity currently, so asking for something more than that, was too much. 

[A/N: In the Paragraph] 

He wants her to expel the person he is inciting on being the 'blackmailer' so he doesn't have to bother doing it himself.

If she can't do that, he has to prepare a few things, and he'll make sure it becomes interesting for her too. 

Of course, he himself could deduce a lot of things from people alone, such as how they're dressing themselves and how they act in certain situations, but these two methods were effective themselves either.

He didn't plan on observing every student in particular to deduce just a few pieces of information, that they put much thought into being clean or not. 

Besides, he was focused on a certain other thing.

Sakayanagi Arisu, to say precisely. 

Arisu Sakayanagi has a special heart condition, more precisely a congenital heart disease, and has to take a special medicament for treatment. 

Knowing this even before he came to school, he also knows that he can use it for his own advantage.

As students are not allowed to leave, the school has to deliver the special medicament she requires for her condition. Usually, you only get a couple of those prescribed, and as far as he knows, until now, that also didn't seem to change when she entered ANHS.

He couldn't precisely look into her medical file; however, the condition was known to him. It didn't take much effort, but even then, you could still deduce it, if you tried.

In equivalence, it also meant you could deduce which medicament she needed, and given the fact that doctors cannot prescribe too much medicament, she will be getting a new load of her medicament soon.

Also, there's a limit on how much medicament you can get without a doctor's receipt, which means she would, from now onwards, get the maximum amount that is allowed in her case. 

In short, once that time comes, he'll confront Chairman Sakayanagi. 

All he could do in the meanwhile was wait. If he hadn't observed her for a long time, he would not know when it comes.

But three days before she entered ANHS, she visited a doctor, to get the maximum amount of medication prescribed by them. 

It all was a simple matter of waiting a bit longer, nothing more.

He could wait. 

He had waited for eight years already.

Three and a half months were nothing. 

Besides, he'll even have time to further perfect his plan. 

One of the reasons why his plan had a great probability of succeeding was that she didn't take pills, but had to take capsules where the medicine was in.

If it were the other way around, it'd be impossible, as long as he didn't have the necessary equipment for doing it.

He also had medication capsules with him capsules when he enrolled in school, identically matching the amount of hers, likewise with capsule color and other details, so all he had to do was exchange these two, if he intended.

If he couldn't exchange the capsules, all he had to do was exchange the water bottle, with the untraceable poison he was creating. But either way, these two options are currently available to him.

As for getting the poison beforehand, it wasn't quite possible. No, it was, in fact, but he was also very afraid. 

He was afraid that the only person with whom he had a bond, his guardian, his father figure, would want to cut ties with him when hearing about his plan.

His butler, Aoki, was the only family and the only bond he had left. 

He'd be deeply disappointed in him.

Alone, that thought itself made it very hard to try to get an effective poison beforehand.

If you overlook this issue, there was also the morality of his actions that was plaguing him day and night. 

He wasn't doing anything good; he knew that, but for the sake of revenge, it was necessary.

What other method, aside from this, would be as effective?

But he really hoped Chairman Sakayanagi would tell him everything of his own accord without being threatened. 

He wants to expel Sakayanagi, but anything more than that...

No, if it's necessary, he has to resolve this. Saving a life for a life, the choice will be Chairman Sakayanagi's to tell him everything, and to decide his daughter's fate.

--

A couple of minutes later, he could see someone opening the door. Unfortunately, it wasn't his girlfriend but the tyrant of her class.

"Kurushima. You seem to date someone from my class. Don't do anything stupid. I'm warning you."

"I didn't plan on doing that."

Without much talk, Ryuen left. He was with his group. They consisted of Ibuki, Kaneda, Albert, Ishizaki and him.

A couple of seconds later, she came out.

"Should we go eat something?"

She nods her head in approval.

"Let's go then."

As the two of them were eating together, they noticed the spree of attention they had gathered around the cafeteria.

Seemingly, it wasn't because he bought himself quite an expensive meal and sometimes shared a couple of chopsticks with her.

Well, it didn't matter what the others were thinking at all. As long as he and she were fine with that, that was all that mattered.

--

[Third-Person Pov]

[22nd August, 15.40, in Kurushima's Room] 

Lying next to each other, Hiyori notices her boyfriend's absent gaze.

"Kaoru, is everything alright? I don't see you too often spacing out at all. Is there something you're worried about?"

"Worried? Yes, that's right... I certainly am. But don't worry, it's because of something else."

'She must have heard it, too, huh? Well, dating someone from different classes is indeed strange and doesn't make you all too popular. But it's not something I particularly care about,' he thought.

"Oh, I see. If it doesn't bother you, would you tell me what's on your mind?"

"I think I can do that. You know..."

"... I asked Chairman Sakayanagi for permission to search for my parents' school year pictures, and he allowed it. But strangely, no matter where I searched, I didn't seem to have found it...." 

"Today, I have searched in the basement of the school with the Chairman's permission, but I've yet to find something from years 87, 88, and 89."

"But I really have to find something. It's... very important to me."

She felt strange. He was never specifying anything when talking about his parents at all. However, she also didn't know if she should ask him about that. 

She arrived at a couple of conclusions herself, based on her conversation with Koenji, but even then, she didn't try to think about it too much.

It felt like she was invading his privacy. If he wanted to tell her something, he should do it himself. Otherwise, it feels very wrong.

"If you don't have anything against it, I can help you with your search."

"But you surely had something you wanted to do right now, didn't you?"

She shakes her head. "No, not in particular. I planned on re-reading "Whose Body," but it's not something I have to do now. I can always re-read it later, so you don't have to worry, Kaoru. I'd gladly help you with your search," she said, smiling brightly.

"Thank you, Hiyori. I appreciate it."

"Isn't that for what a partner is there for? Helping each other in need?"

Seeing no objection to what she said, he replies. "Yeah, I guess that's true."

"Well, then, shall we?"

"Yes, let's go."

--

[Hiyori Pov]

[22nd August, 18.51]

"Twenty-eight cardboard boxes and still nothing? Hah... are they even here? Perhaps, it was disposed of a long time ago. Why do I even search at all? It's been hours already... I wasted your time and mine too. Damn it."

I could see him clenching his fists. 

Seeing how annoyed he was, I wanted to help him calm down. 

I hugged him from the back. "Kaoru, I'm sure we'll find it. Don't worry, we still have a lot of time. Today, tomorrow, and that day afterward, I'll help you find it, until we have found it."

"Thank you. Really, thank you. I appreciate it very much. I really... don't think I deserve you."

I feel like he wanted to tell me something really important with his last sentence, but I couldn't hear him well. Why did he decide to mutter it?

"Anyway, I think we should go. Today, we searched enough."

"Are you sure? I don't mind searching for a couple of hours further."

"No, we should set ourselves limits. Today, we searched enough."

'If it were me alone, I wouldn't have minded searching for the whole night... But with her, it is different. I can see that it's exhausting for her.' Kurushima thought.

"Hiyori, can I invite you to dinner, as a token of my appreciation? Only if you'd like, of course. I don't want to make you feel forced."

"Don't worry, I'll gladly accompany you to a dinner." 

--

Two hours later, I arrived at my room, throwing myself out of embarrassment in the bed. I was never that type of person to get embarrassed, but love does seem to do many things with me.

We had a romantic dinner—a really romantic one. Aside from us, no one seemed to be there, so we had the whole restaurant for ourselves. I didn't think it'd make such a difference, but it really does.

Whenever I'm alone with him, I feel so comfortable. I feel like the books I read when I was younger describing the encounter with your soulmate weren't just fairy tales anymore, but have now become my reality. 

I never expected to fall in love when I entered this school. It's so fascinating how I'm lately enjoying my life to the fullest only through him alone. 

These two days were really special for me. We spent day and night together; we would read together, laugh together, and... I kiss him on the cheek.

I'm still not fairly accustomed to kisses on the cheek yet...

Everything sometimes feels a bit too surreal for me...

I'm still in awe of how we became a couple.

I had heard so often in the past how he has gotten Love letters in his locker, that it made me feel less confident whenever he was meeting up with a girl that he might suddenly have a girlfriend. 

It was one of my constant worries...

Looking back at it, I should have mustered my courage. 

If I had done that previously, we could've perhaps spent the Cruise Ship as a couple. It was so beautiful, and I somehow regret not confessing, because it seemed like the perfect opportunity to do so.

In the end, I too was simply a girl, afraid of being rejected by her love. I'm just glad that everything is fine now. 

I'm happy with him, and I want us to remain like that, after school and perhaps even further... for a long time...

Oh, my... Hiyori what are you even thinking? We're just spending two days together. I'll creep him out in the end, if I tell him my thoughts.

Although... a part of me tells me he would be surely happy about it...

But I do wonder... if he's interested in that? Being together after school?

Surely, he is, right?

Throwing my legs up and down and feeling the embarrassment on my face, I wondered whether I was still the always calm and rational person anymore.

Mostly, I am. 

Just not around Kaoru. When I'm around him, instead of being rational, I'm becoming a girl driven by her emotions. It sure is a wonderful thing.

I now understand why love is always depicted as a positive thing in most of the books, because it sure is something beautiful.

I just hope it lasts really long...

I don't want to part away from him... 

I want to keep reading books with him, spend time, and do different of other things with him, too. I really like him... so I hope nothing bad happens.

--

[26th August]

Today was Friday, the 26th of August, and we still had yet to find something. Of course, one of the reasons why it took so long was because of the preparations for the upcoming Sports Festival. 

While I'm certainly not good physically in particular, Kaoru certainly is. He is both academically gifted and physically gifted, and surely, in terms of intelligence, there are a few who might be on par with him.

While he usually keeps quiet about a couple of things, when we play Quizzes out of fun, he always beats me. 

I feel like I'm playing against a Computer sometimes, because he has an overwhelming amount of knowledge regarding everything. In the end, I wasn't able to defeat him in any of these quizzes. 

"Sorry for being a bit late. We had to discuss a couple of things in class." I said.

"No worries. Shall we go, then?"

I nodded my head in approval.

After a couple of minutes, we arrived. 

"Well, let's get to work," he said.

"I'll resume where I last stopped."

"Likewise."

After one and a half hours of searching, we had by now looked into a decent amount of cardboard boxes. "And with this one, it's the 156 cardboard box. Hah... I think it's better to stop entirely."

"Don't say that, Kaoru. We've come so far. Let's search further. Our strategy hasn't been wrong. It's just difficult with the amount of cardboard boxes to get ahold of the chosen few."

"That's true. We've made great progress, haven't we? We covered up the years 1995–2012 already. Certainly, we're near the cardboard box for 87, 88, and 89." 

For the next remaining hour, we searched further. 

I opened another cardboard box in the hope of something being there. It was by now the 167 cardboard boxes we have opened and checked. 

It was quite a difficult task, but I didn't want to fail.

Besides, Kaoru was the one who took the cardboard boxes with a lot of weight, while I took the ones with less weight. So I shouldn't be exhausted.

At least not yet. 

In a hour it might be different, though. 

When I opened the cardboard, I saw something strange.

It was a name list, but the year wasn't written there. I scanned the name list quickly, until I got ahold of one name in particular: Kurushima Shu. 

Since the year didn't stand on the list, I didn't plan on giving Kaoru hope, if it just happened to be a stranger or a relative of his.

A bit later, I could see a couple of pictures. 

One picture in particular made me attentive. It was a picture of two young teens in their second year it seemed, who had under themselves seemed to have written down their own names; Shu X Miyuu were written down. 

For a moment, I couldn't recognize it, but then I noticed it. At the top right, the number 88 was written down. 

Kurushima Shu... that was one of the names on the list. Does that mean... that this person is his father? He does resemble him, but his eyes do not. 

He doesn't have the same eye color as him.

"Kaoru, I think I might have found something."

"Hmm?" He slowly walked towards me, looking behind my back. 

"That's..."

"Is that your father?"

He looks quite similar to him. It's just a slight difference in the face and eyes. Perhaps, he has gotten the face from his Mother then? Is she, perhaps? 

"That's my father and my mother. You found it. The cardboard box for one of those three years, Hiyori. Thank you."

Seeing him behind me made me quite embarrassed. It's one of the few times I've seen him like this. He's so vulnerable; it's as if he's constantly hiding something.

I was always the person who liked mysteries, but the mystery surrounding him was something I was afraid to explore. I don't want to put my relationship with him on the line because of my curiosity about him.

So, even at this moment, I've tried to detain my curiosity. 

I knew well that the topic of his family was a sensitive topic for him.

"A high school relationship developing into marriage? It's quite—"

"Beautiful, isn't it? It's very rare nowadays, but it does happen. For my parents, at the very least, that was the case."

"I agree!"

I looked into the picture in my hand. "Your mother is really beautiful. I don't think I have ever seen someone as beautiful as her. What about you?" 

Is that a strange question?

I mean, I think so.

But I'm not entirely sure either.

"I have."

"Hmm? Who?"

"You."

I couldn't help but get embarrassed. I could feel my cheeks getting redder and redder each second. I always feel around him so different.

When I encounter other people, that doesn't even happen.

Unless, a classmate of mine has done something wrong to a person, like destroying their things, I apologize and compensate them. 

Otherwise, I'm just interacting with Ryuen-kun when he needs advice, or with Albert, Ibuki, Ichizaki, and also with Mii-chan, a friend of mine from Kaoru's class. That'd be all the people with whom I'm interacting with. 

"Sometimes you're quite dense, Hiyori. It's quite rare to see you like that. But I like it. I like it when you're so immersed in reading books that you don't even perceive anyone else. And so do I like this side of yours—the clueless side of yours."

"You always tease me, Kaoru."

"I'm not teasing you. I'm just stating the truth. Why shouldn't I find my girlfriend beautiful?"

"Ahm.... Thank you."

I didn't think saying 'Thank you' was the proper thing to say in this situation, but it was all I could think in that particular moment.

I got out of his way for a moment, as I still stood in front of the cardboard box and let himself see what's inside.

There were a proper amount of pictures in there. A surprising amount, actually. But a decent amount was just in general pictures with random students'.

But there it was: a small folder that had, just like before, their names written down. I could see him hesitating. His hands were shaking enormously. And I could feel how everything was eating him up. 

I said at that moment what I wanted to say so long ago to him.

"It's alright. You're not alone anymore, Kaoru."

It felt like the right thing to say in this situation. There wasn't anything else I could think of to say to reassure him.

"Yeah, that's right."

He resolved himself and opened the folder, which had a couple of pictures in it. It wasn't a large folder by any means—a rather small one, actually.

Seeing him looking at the first picture, I could see his mouth twitching a bit. Is it really something sensitive? I guess... No, I don't want to conclude it.

If he wants to tell me about it, I have to hear it from him. 

He looked to picture after picture, until he was at the last one. 

"I remember my father telling me about this. At that time, I couldn't believe that they did this. But they have taken pictures of it, it seems. Hahaha, they really wrapped the Chairman's Office with toilet paper. I wonder... what they were thinking when they did it." 

He couldn't help but laugh.

"Kaoru...? Is everything alright?"

"Yes, sorry, it's just a bit strange seeing it. My parents always used to lecture me about not doing any inappropriate behavior, yet they have done it themselves. It's a bit funny, I admit."

"Yeah. For a moment, all I felt was to laugh. But now... I'm not sure anymore... My heart is clenching in pain like crazy. I wonder: Will it ever stop? That pain of mine... Could it perhaps be my destiny... perhaps, to be pitiful and..."

"No, never mind. I'm becoming quite talkative now, aren't I? Sorry to have bothered you with this, Hiyori. Let's search further."

"How long are you planning to keep quiet, Kaoru? I'm your partner now. You can tell me the things that are bothering you. If you say things like that, I feel like I can't help you at all. I want to be a pillar of comfort when you need it. You don't have to hide anything from me. So please, rely on me. That's what partners are there for, aren't they? Tell me your worries, please."

He looked a bit hesitant at first, but was seemingly convinced. 

"Okay, but this is not the proper place. Let's head to my room. I'll answer everything that you want to know there." 

"I don't want to force you. If you don't want to talk about it, that's also fine. I want you to tell me those things out of your own accord."

"You're not forcing me; don't worry. I should have done this a long time ago. It's slowly getting time to tell you the truth." 

--

Arriving there, he offered me a seat on his bed. He sat down on his chair, facing me in the opposite direction. 

"Where should I start, huh? As you might have suspected from the way I was talking about them, you must surely have figured it out at least. Today, I was a bit more vulnerable than usual, when talking about my parents."

"As you might have concluded already based on today, my parents are no longer alive anymore; alongside my younger sister Kaori, and my younger brother Kyo, they died in a car accident eight years ago."

"Since I didn't have any other relatives left, Aoki, the butler of mine, became my guardian and essentially my parental figure throughout these years. He was the person my parents wanted to be our guardian, if something happened to them. In the end, just Aoki became my guardian, not that of my siblings."

"... Ever since their deaths, I've had yet to find something to bring me joy. Life... has been nothing but a pure hell. I didn't properly attend school anymore; I had panic attacks almost every day and everyday nightmares, and because I was their son, I had to look out for their legacy."

"Everything I do affects their conglomerate. Whether people were fired or not was sometimes dependent on the grades I was writing. So I've decided to become someone without flaws, Kurushima Kaoru, the genius son, who, despite his hardships, was able to perform anything he did flawlessly."

"In the end, the stress was making me feel absolutely crazy. One of the reasons I rarely attended middle school was because I wanted no one to see my panic attacks. I didn't have the intention of having the media know that."

"Something like this could crush everything they worked for. I didn't have the intention of anyone destroying their hard work and passion they spent years for, not even myself. A legacy... I had to preserve it. That was my task. My burden..." 

"I knew it very well and had resolved myself to do this. Until today... I have seen people only use me for their own gain. For them, I was a means for their purpose. Friends, whom I thought they were, only befriended me because of my Status and wealth."

"That was what Kurushima Kaoru was for society. The heir of one of Japan's wealthiest families and an opportunity to rise through their own individual ranks. For that reason, in the end, I could neither trust other people nor bond myself with other people."

"I always kept myself at an appropriate distance from others'. However, to prevent rumors from leaking... I was always kind and helpful to everyone. In the end, I guess that's one of the reasons I seem to be rated rather cooperatively from the school's perspective."

"When I entered this school, I thought everything would be different, but the fact of myself being an heir to a conglomerate was soon revealed afterward. Hah, the information I had no intention of revealing had been revealed."

"I was going to be judged again. But I've always kept quiet about everything. Not once did I specify anything. Even if I were one, they wouldn't know to what extent. At least, the school kept their promise."

"Anything relating to me was removed from the Web. I was a bit reassured. If it wasn't my wealth that made people drawn to me, I could perhaps... form a friendship, bond or something else here now." 

"But in the end, if Wealth wasn't the criteria anymore, the criteria were now my looks. Well, I guess it was still better than people approaching me because of my wealth, at least... I think..."

"That's my life summarized, Hiyori," he laughed, painfully.

'She doesn't need to know everything. This much, should be fine,' he thought, looking down dejectedly at the floor.

Even before I could realize it myself, my body moved for a hug. 

"Kaoru... I'm so sorry to hear that. I can't imagine how hard it must have been for you, all these years. I'll be by your side, no matter what. If you ever feel like it becomes too much to bear, you can just rely on me. I'll be there to help you as much as I can. Thank you, for sharing this with me. It means a lot to me that you decided to share this information with me."

"Can we stay like this... for a couple of minutes further?" he asked.

"Everything you want."

Six minutes later, he seemed to be ready to talk again.

"I think, I'm going to sleep, Hiyori." 

"Okay. Kaoru, I'll stay too."

"Hmm?"

"I'll be sleeping here tonight, if it's okay with you."

"Don't feel forced to do so. I'm really okay."

"I'm staying here because I want to. You can be really dense sometimes, Kaoru. But that side of yours, the clueless side of yours, is a side I really like."

A tear from his left side of his eye was slowly coming down. 

He hid it, by turning himself against the wall, while lying on his bed.

I lied myself next to him and hugged him from the side.

That was all I could do, in the moment.

After ten minutes, my eyes became darker and darker, until I fell asleep next to him.

--

A/N: Well, Kurushima isn't lying to her, he's just not entirely stating everything. The things he said were true, but he's keeping the fact with them being murdered or other things completely to himself.

But anyway, this was a rather long chapter. 

How did you find it?

He's normally never vulnerable like that, but he's also just a traumatized child, whose past is greatly affecting him.

He isn't like Ayanokoji, since his past is well-known to many people, it's just that he chose to hide it. Besides, he does feel a great range of emotions, which affect his behavior and his plans.

Expelling Sakayanagi and Kanzaki is an emotional choice, not something that is an essential need for his revenge. He does it, because he wants to ruin their future, like their parents might be the ones who ruined everything in his life.

The real revenge is against their parents, if they're found guilty.

While they might not be the ones who did something against his family, they're people who have knowledge regarding at least something, which they keep quiet, so for him, they're guilty and corrupt to their deep core. 

That's also why he's surprised Chairman Sakayanagi was kind to him, when he visited him. He wonders whether his perception about him was false or not.

In the end, it does not change his plans, though. 

Because he knows, Chairman Sakayanagi knows something.

He's really an Interesting character to write. I don't think I ever felt like that, when I wrote other characters. Not in regards of this story, but regarding other fanfic stories, for which I have drafts for, and made an OC.

But anyway, how do you find Kurushima? Do you like him as a character?

He's very different from other fanfic OC's, since his actions have actual purpose. 

Please leave a comment or a review there.

I really appreciate them. 

The next chapter will be where he expels someone.

I'm technically finished with it, but the plan might not be perfect. If you still want me to upload it, please write a comment, and I'll do so. I think it's good enough, as I created a decent enough scenario, I believe. 

Anyway, that'll be all.

Goodbye! Have a great day.